Archive for July, 2012

Mitt Romney Dances Away From Dressage (Limerick)

Saturday, July 28th, 2012

In a healthy marriage, spouses share each other’s joys and take pride in one another’s accomplishments. For instance, imagine a married woman whose horse makes it all the way to the Olympics. If her marriage is a good one, you’d expect her to watch and root along with her spouse.

Alas, Ann Romney won’t be experiencing such loving togetherness. Why not? Because Mitt has made his indifference quite clear, presumably for political reasons: Dressage is Ann’s thing, and he doesn’t plan to watch it.

“I have to tell you, this is Ann’s sport,” he said. “I’m not even sure which day the sport goes on. She will get the chance to see it, I will not be watching the event…”

Mitt Romney Dances Away From Dressage (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Ann’s horse in Olympic contention
Has been causing Mitt’s camp apprehension:
He won’t watch it compete.
What a strange way to treat
His fine wife. Should she skip his convention?

Limerick Ode To Mitt (The Diplomat) Romney

Thursday, July 26th, 2012

Dear Mitt Romney: How on earth did you manage to cause a diplomatic incident in Great Britain?

Just what we want in a president — someone so desperate to show off his knowledge about the Olympics, that he insults our best friends, the Brits, while a guest in their country.

LONDON — Mitt Romney’s carefully choreographed trip to London caused a diplomatic stir when he called the British Olympic preparations “disconcerting” and questioned whether Londoners would turn out to support the Games.

“The stories about the private security firm not having enough people, the supposed strike of the immigration and customs officials, that obviously is not something which is encouraging,” Mr. Romney said in an interview with NBC on Wednesday.

That prompted a tart rejoinder from the British prime minister, David Cameron. “We are holding an Olympic Games in one of the busiest, most active, bustling cities anywhere in the world. Of course it’s easier if you hold an Olympic Games in the middle of nowhere,” an allusion to Salt Lake City, which hosted Games that Mr. Romney oversaw.

Limerick Ode To Mitt (The Diplomat) Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Mitt’s Olympian need to convey
Expertise nearly caused a huge fray.
A prez needs the skill
Of diplomacy: Shrill,
Blow by blow game-host insults? Bad play!

Outgunned By Cowardice (Limerick)

Wednesday, July 25th, 2012

Roger Simon says it all about gun baloney, but I still have to write this limerick:

Outgunned By Cowardice (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Both Obama and Mitt are distressed,
By the movie house murders depressed.
But those gun lobby fears
Beget action-free tears:
Tighten gun control? Surely you jest!

(Cross-posted on Limerick Debate.)

Limerick Ode To Mitt (The Wonk) Romney

Wednesday, July 25th, 2012

Mitt Romney’s a real foreign policy wonk. Who knew?

Limerick Ode To Mitt (The Wonk) Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Here’s the message that’s coming from Mitten:
Barack has been mean to Great Britain—
He has dissed Winston’s bust,
For which Romney has lust,
And Obama ain’t Anglo-Sax smitten.


Thursday, July 19th, 2012

Let me confess up front that tithing big bucks to your church or synagogue doesn’t impress me … and not just because I’m an agnostic. In my opinion, generosity to one’s religious peer group often tends to be self-aggrandizing: “Hey, look at me — I’m a big church-macher!”

Now give the same amount of money to a food or health charity or a symphony or art museum, for instance — one that you’re not directly affiliated with — that, to me, is generous.

And this isn’t my only problem with Ann Romney’s defense of hubby Mitt’s tax return secrecy. Here’s what she said to Robin Roberts in an ABC Good Morning America interview:

He’s a very generous person. We give 10 percent of our income to our church every year. Do you think that is the kind of person who is trying to hide things, or do things?…

We’ve given all you people need to know…

In other words, if “you people” could see Mitt’s secret tax returns, “you people” would know there’s no need for “you people” to see them.

Tithing-Schmithing (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Just what is Mitt trying to hide?
In secrecy, Romney takes pride.
How ironic and blithe:
We should trust him; his tithe
Means he’s good — so decreeth his bride.


Four years ago, Mitt Romney gave John McCain a slew of tax returns, hoping to become McCain’s running mate. McCain didn’t pick him, but now says Romney’s tax returns weren’t a problem; Sarah Palin was simply a “better candidate.”

Obama’s thank you note’s in the mail.

Limerick Ode To Wimpy Mitt Romney

Tuesday, July 17th, 2012

According to Bloomberg Businessweek, Mitt Romney may have a wimp problem.

Limerick Ode To Wimpy Mitt Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Is Romney a wimp? So it seems:
“Take it back” is the message Mitt screams.
Say “you’re sorry,” retract;
That’s Mitt Romney’s whole act.
So is that how he’d deal with regimes?

Running-Mate Rumblings (Limerick)

Tuesday, July 17th, 2012

A VEEP pick this early in the campaign would be very unusual. Yet the media is packed with rumors saying Romney’s VP announcement is imminent. Gee … I wonder just who’s feeding those rumors.

Running-Mate Rumblings (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Here’s a rumor conveyed with a swoon:
Romney ‘s VEEP pick may come very soon.
Mitt is desp’rate for eyes
On NOT-Bain: No surprise
That the news now is VEEP-gossip strewn.


Mitt Romney, on his post-February 1999 affairs:

I did not have corporeal relations with that company, Bain Capital!

Limerick Ode To Mitt “How Dare You Call Me CEO!” Romney

Friday, July 13th, 2012

Anyone who’s ever been a corporate lawyer (and I confess that that includes me) knows that corporations take SEC filings very seriously. So if someone (ie., Mitt Romney) is designated as Bain’s “CEO,” “President,” “Chairman of the Board,” and “sole stockholder,” he can’t disclaim responsibility. In other words, either Romney’s lying now, or several Bain documents are deceptive, if not fraudulent.

Limerick Ode To Mitt “How Dare You Call Me CEO!” Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Romney’s goal to be president’s fraught.
In Bain’s titular web he’s been caught:
Says Mitt, “chief exec”
Has no meaning. Then heck,
Being POTUS must also mean naught.

Open Limerick To House Republicans

Wednesday, July 11th, 2012

Open Limerick To House Republicans
By Madeleine Begun Kane

House Republicans, kindly get real:
Your big focus is health care repeal—
Over thirty such votes!
Where’s your bill that promotes
“Jobs, jobs, jobs” with equivalent zeal?

Open Limerick To Chief Justice John Roberts

Monday, July 2nd, 2012

Open Limerick To Chief Justice John Roberts
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Justice Roberts, your allies are mean,
And their attitude’s often obscene.
When they hate one decision,
Their answer’s derision:
Your meds fried your brain. No more sheen!

With people like that in your camp,
Perhaps it is time to revamp
Your views and opinions.
Dump low-lives as minions.
Convert! Be a working man’s champ.