Archive for the ‘Bill O’Reilly’ Category

Barack & Zach (Limerick)

Wednesday, March 12th, 2014

Bill O’Reilly is outraged, once again, at Barack Obama. What is it this time? The president had the audacity to go where the twenty-somethings are, in order to plug the Affordable Care Act and HealthCare.gov; he gamely appeared on Funny Or Die’s “Between Two Ferns,” for an interview with Zach Galifianakis.

Barack & Zach
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Obama’s appearance with Zach
Has inspired O’Reilly’s attack:
A strong prez would not go
On a comedy show
To plug HealthCare.gov and just yak.

It seems Bill is a psychic. Oh my!
He’s an all-knowing, soothsaying guy,
Who swears Lincoln would never
Have gone on (not ever!!!)
A show done by Funny Or Die.

Chris Wallace Feels Dissed

Saturday, September 19th, 2009

Poor Chris Wallace has been whining to Bill O’Reilly about Fox News Sunday not getting an Obama interview. Apparently Obama’s making a huge mistake in refusing to be interviewed by such a fair fellow.

My favorite part of the video is where Wallace calls Obama’s White House, “The biggest bunch of crybabies I have dealt with in my 30 years in Washington.”

Yup, sounds “fair and balanced” to me.

This calls for a limerick, don’t you think?

Chris Wallace Feels Dissed
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Chris Wallace is feeling left out—
No Obama appearance to tout.
Wallace swears on the air:
He’s not Beck. He is fair
To those “crybabies.” Why would we doubt?

Related Post: Fox Pundits At Sea

Declaring War On The “War On Christmas” Whine

Friday, December 12th, 2008

I was heartened to read this column declaring war on the “war on Christmas” whine. Something tells me, however, that Bill O’Reilly won’t agree.

I don’t have time to write anything new about Bill O’Reilly’s war on the faux war on Christmas, because my mother’s been in the ICU for the last week. But a song parody I wrote three years ago remains surprisingly up to date:

Bill O’Reilly’s Faux War On Christmas — Song Parody (Sing to Get Me To The Church On Time)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Bill says we’re waging war on Christmas,
Spouting another Fox News lie.
Bill’s rarely proper.
Loves telling whoppers.
Ain’t nothing that his fans won’t buy.

Bill claims we’re screwing blessed Christmas.
We’re greeting people wrong, he cries.
Not saying merry,
Christmas is very,
Belligerent and most unwise.

O’Reilly’s nasty, and quite the bore.
Too bad that Fox won’t kick him out the door.

Store signs must twinkle “Merry Christmas.”
“Happy” and “holidays” won’t do.
Bill makes a rumpus,
With no moral compass.
He leaves truth in the lurch.
O’Reilly goes to church?
He fibs and fabricates and lies on cue.

Bill says we’re out to outlaw Christmas.
Some people call its tree a bush!
Bill’s not facetious.
Bill’s claims are specious.
His reasoning is packed with mush.

Bill says we’re out to kill off Christmas.
We’re harming symbols so sublime.
Bill’s got a vision.
Bill’s on a mission:
To battle his faux war prime time.

Is Bill a madman, or just perverse?
It’s hard to picture a talk show host who’s worse.

Shop lights must twinkle “Merry Christmas.”
“Seasons” and “greetings” just won’t do.
Bill likes inciting,
And people dividing.
He leaves truth in the lurch.
O’Reilly goes to church?
He fibs and fabricates and lies on cue.

Is Olbermann Turning Into O’Reilly?

Saturday, June 14th, 2008

Is it just me?  Or is Keith Olbermann turning into Bill O’Reilly?

The bombastic commentary.  The narcissism.  And, of course, the misogyny.

I’d thought that once Obama clinched the Democratic nomination, it would be safe to start watching Countdown again.  Without Keith’s daily anti-Hillary target practice, I might even be able to watch it without cringing.

Wrong!

Keith’s bloviating “Worst Person in the World” anti-Katie Couric tirade was almost enough to make me turn to Bill O’Reilly. Talk about desperate!

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Is Olbermann Turning Into O’Reilly? 
By Madeleine Begun Kane

In the past I cheered Olbermann’s rants—
Loved his anti-war, anti-Bush stance.
But misogynous bluster
Is all he can muster
In Olbermann’s mirror-romance.