Archive for the ‘Justice Department’ Category

A Plea Deal For Donald? Don’t Even Think About It! (Limerick)

Friday, August 11th, 2023

Headlines like this drive me nuts: “Is It Possible Trump Will Strike a Plea Deal to Avoid Prison?”

A plea deal for Trump? That’s just mad!
Speculation like that’s simply sad.
Any pact he might make,
He would instantly break!
Trump’s a slippery snake of a cad.

Whining For Time (Limerick)

Monday, August 7th, 2023

“Trump’s defense needs more time!” That’s the plea
From John Lauro, last week in DC.
But the judge should be tough,
Cuz oddly enough
John had time for “full Ginsburg” TV.

Smith v. Trump (Limerick)

Friday, August 4th, 2023

Though Donald’s the lowest of low,
His infamy slide’s been too slow.
But the courts are all humming,
And justice is coming;
Trump’s finally battling a pro.

Donald Trump’s Finally Trumped (Limerick)

Wednesday, August 2nd, 2023

Another indictment’s been filed,
And Donald’s both anxious and riled
And undoubtedly frightened.
The vise has been tightened,
And law shall prevail! (“Will be wild!”)

Trump’s “Delete The Server” Woes (Limerick)

Friday, July 28th, 2023

Security footage begone!
Ordered Trump, like a mafia don.
Said a tech in IT:
I can’t do it. Not me!
And so Trump is a soon-to-be con.

Trump’s “Bravado” Defense

Wednesday, June 28th, 2023

Headline: “Trump says it was just ‘bravado’ when he claimed having Iran attack plan in caught-on-tape Bedminster meeting”

Caught on tape, Trump’s exposure is dire,
So he seems to have taken a flyer
On a novel defense
For admissions immense:
He just labels himself a big liar.

Hope, At Last? (2-Verse Limerick)

Thursday, June 15th, 2023

The Donald has many a flaw;
For instance, contempt for the law.
Then there’s meanness and greed
And his self-centered creed.
Plus he lies with each flap of his jaw.

So our household is filled with excitement
Over Donald Trump’s fed’ral indictment.
He at last just might pay
For his crimes. Till that day,
I shall savor my dream with delightment.

Limerick Ode To Trump’s Federal Indictment

Saturday, June 10th, 2023

Trump’s fed’ral indictment’s a beaut,
Packed with facts very hard to dispute.
He may fin’ly be nailed
And at long last be jailed!
(In the meantime, he’ll raise tons of loot.)

Stop The TEASE!

Thursday, March 23rd, 2023

Is anyone else feeling teased
By Trumpian news? I’m displeased!
Yes, there’s LOTS of excitement,
But where’s the indictment?
No perp walk? No plea? Not appeased!

Trump Just Deserts? (Limerick)

Saturday, December 31st, 2022

My last Trump limerick of the year. (I hope it isn’t unduly optimistic.)

When Trump is at long last arrested,
Will he fin’ly acknowledge he’s bested
And surrender with grace
And a smile on his face?
Ha, he’ll protest with falsehoods time-tested.

A Legal Adieu To Special Master Review (Limerick)

Thursday, December 1st, 2022

Trump has lost his appeal in a rout;
Cannon’s pro-Donald rulings are out.
Special Master review
Has been halted. So cue
Sev’ral rants from that “former guy” lout.

2-Verse Limerick Ode To Donald “Won’t Partake” Trump

Sunday, November 20th, 2022

Since a Trump Special Counsel’s been named
By Garland, the AG’s been blamed
For political smears,
While Trump and his peers
Keep claiming he’s framed and defamed.

Trump insists that he will not “partake”
In the probe, for that treacherous snake
Thinks it makes him sound tough,
As he struggles to slough
Off his fears. Yes, he knows what’s at stake.

Open Letter To Donald Trump

Friday, November 18th, 2022

Dear Donald:

Congrats on your 2nd very personal Special Counsel.

What a shame that THIS TIME, you don’t have an AG willing and eager to lie about his report.

Trump, The Extortionist (Limerick)

Tuesday, August 30th, 2022

Headline: “Trump Is Trying To Extort America”

Donald Trump is so desp’rate to thwart
Prosecution, he’s apt to resort
To additional crimes,
Like extortion ofttimes;
Indict Trump! Get that felon to court!

Garland v. Trump

Thursday, August 11th, 2022

Dear Donald, it seems that your bluff
Has been called, and in you’re in quite the huff.
Garland’s move to unseal
That warrant? Big deal!
Seems you’ve shot yourself right in the duff.

Barr Pens A Limerick

Thursday, February 13th, 2020

Dear Donald, your tweets make me look
Like your lapdog; my staffers are shook.
So stop! I’m not kidding.
Cuz doing your bidding
Is hard when I look like a schnook.

Trump’s Fixer (Bill Barr) Does It Again (2-Verse Limerick)

Tuesday, February 11th, 2020

Two-Verse Limerick for Dueling Headlines:

Headline 1: “Trump Denounces Proposed Sentence for Roger Stone”

Headline 2: “Justice Department undercuts own prosecutors on Trump ally Stone’s sentencing”

The dictator’s at it once more,
Ably aided by Barr; ev’ry chore
Donald orders, Barr does
Why’s he do it? Becuz
They’re both scoundrels and vile to their core.

Barr forgets he’s our nation’s AG,
That his oath’s NOT to Donald, you see,
So when Donald Trump tweeted
That Stone’s been mistreated,
Fixer-Barr fulfills Donald’s decree.

Bracing For Barr’s Mueller Report Whitewash (Limerick)

Monday, April 15th, 2019

Headline: “Mueller Report Coming on Thursday”

Though the “Mueller Report” soon’s a-coming,
Many Sharpies are busily humming
With redactions galore;
A “blackwash” full-bore!
Thanks to Barr, through a sham we’ll be thumbing.

Open Limerick To William Barr

Sunday, April 14th, 2019

Dear Bill Barr, you have gone very far,
And your rep once was well above par.
But like most who have deigned
To join Trump, you’ve been stained;
Tainted, marred by a sycophant’s scar.

Unconstitutional Stench of Whitaker Appointment (Limerick)

Monday, November 19th, 2018

Headline: “Senate Democrats Sue to Block Whitaker Appointment”

Will a judge block Matt Whitaker’s rise
To Acting A.G.? I surmise
His appointment’s unlawful–
Unspeakably awful…
But just fine in Trump-bootlicker eyes.