Posts Tagged ‘Election Humor’

Rally Folly (Limerick)

Monday, June 22nd, 2020

Dear Donald, you seem to be sad
Cuz that rally in Tulsa was BAD.
Your turnout was poor–
A shanda full-bore–
Just deserts for a self-dealing cad.

Irrational Polls (Limerick)

Friday, March 27th, 2020

Headline: “Trump’s Approval Jumps Five Points”

A rise in the Donald’s approval
Transcends logic; he merits removal!
Such a gain in our national
Polls is irrational…
As peculiar as numbers from Liouville.*

*If you don’t understand my reference to mathematician Joseph Liouville, here’s a helpful link. And no, I’d never heard of him before, either. But when you’re desperate for a rhyme word, sometimes you have to research math.

One Crime Too Many? (Limerick)

Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Trump’s a knave who has gone way too far.
(So too, has his pal AG Barr.)
An impeachment is nigh.
There’s no choice, and here’s why:
Trump behaves like a tyrant and czar.

Limerick Ode To The “Never Wrong” Trump

Friday, September 6th, 2019

Headline: “Analysis: Storm spat underscores Mr. Never Wrong’s mindset”

Trump admit a mistake? No not ever!
He must keep his base thinking he’s clever;
So though facts may be clear,
Donald never will veer
From his “THEY’RE wrong! I’m perfect!” endeavor.

Trump Messing With The Wrong Actress (Limerick)

Sunday, September 1st, 2019

The Donald is twitter-obsessing,
And his topic this times’s Debra Messing.
But his story won’t sell;
Used his “called me “Sir” tell.
Trump feels threatened by Debra, I’m guessing.

Limerick Ode To The Campaigner-In-Chief

Wednesday, June 19th, 2019

Donald’s running again? What a “shock!”
His “relaunch” (so-called) is a crock.
He treats his campaign
As his job. That’s been plain
From the day of his swearing-in squawk.

I Dislike Likability (Limerick)

Sunday, May 5th, 2019

Headline: “Is ‘Likability’ Biased Towards Men?”

“Likability” — what a odd word;
It appears that most any male turd
Can be deemed by the press
As more likable — yes —
Than a non-turd-like female. Absurd!

Trump’s Team Of Crooks (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 18th, 2018

Slate: “The DOJ has made a pretty thorough case that the Trump campaign was filled with crooks.”

Trump’s campaign-team was teeming with crooks
It surely was one for the books;
His affinity for
That felonious corps
Was driven by greed. (Not good looks.)

Trump Can Forget the “Edwards Defense” (Limerick)

Friday, December 14th, 2018

Trump’s hush money payments to gals
Is NOT a big deal, say his pals.
Trump can use the defense
That Edwards used; hence
Donald wins. (That’s their flawed rationales.)

But the “shield-wife defense” won’t apply
To Donald Trump’s pay-offs. Here’s why:
Those who made them concede
That their goal was impede
An election loss. Donald — Buh-Bye!

Trump Runs Away From Pence? (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 5th, 2018

Headline: “Trump’s Team Considers Removing Mike Pence from 2020 Ticket”

Will the Donald give Mike Pence the boot?
That’s the re-elect rumor. Each coot
Deserves only the worst.
Yes for vengeance, I thirst,
And I’m hoping this question is moot.

Death Of Democracy? (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 4th, 2018

Headline: “Let’s stop using euphemisms; American democracy is under attack

Our democracy’s under attack;
Voting systems are all out of whack.
Gerrymand’ring has wrecked
Our nation. Unchecked,
We’ll “elect” only quack, flak, and hack.

GOP Course Correction? Of Course Not! (Limerick)

Sunday, December 2nd, 2018

Headline: “Despite Big House Losses, G.O.P. Shows No Signs of Course Correction

Course correction is NOT being planned
By Republican pols, though their brand
Has been sullied by kissing
Trump’s ass. They are missing
Their balls and remaining unmanned.

Border Surge Stunt (Limerick)

Monday, November 26th, 2018

Trump’s surge on the border’s a stunt.
He did it as part of his hunt
For votes and support,
Using fear to exhort
His base, keeping bias up front.

Golfer-In-Chief Trump (Limerick)

Monday, November 26th, 2018

In the course of election-month drama,
Trump had scant time for golf — what a trauma!
Donald’s golf time was sparse
In November — poor arse —
So he managed to tie Prez Obama.

(Inspired by this Washington Post Headline.)

The GOP Draws The Wrong Conclusions (Limerick)

Thursday, November 15th, 2018

Headline: “McCarthy Blames Loss of House on ‘Historical Trends’”

Don’t expect any rueful admissions
To explain the Dem’s House seat additions.
No the GOP bends
The truth, blaming trends;
Not its actions and dreadful positions.

Trump’s Post-Election Trauma (Limerick)

Thursday, November 15th, 2018

Poor Donald is mad and depressed.
He’s failing the test to “Be Best.”
Stocks are fueling his pique.
Wall-dough funding looks bleak…
And just wait till he’s under arrest.

*************

(ALTERNATIVE VERSIONS)

Poor Donald is mad and depressed.
He’s failing the test to “Be Best.”
Mueller’s fueling his pique.
Wall-dough funding looks bleak…
And just wait till he’s under arrest.
************

Poor Donald’s becoming depressed.
He’s missing his usual zest.
Things with Mueller look bleak,
Which accounts for his pique…
And just wait till he’s under arrest.

************

Poor Donald’s becoming depressed.
He’s missing his usual zest.
The election last week
Might account for his pique…
But just wait till he’s under arrest.

Election Stress (Limerick)

Sunday, November 4th, 2018

Headline: “There’s Plenty To Stress Over In The ‘Anxiety Election'”

I’m nervous! I’m anxious! I’m stressed!
Leave the house? That entails getting dressed!
Pre-Election Day tension;
Fear, anger, dissension!
I might just pull a “Baldwin.” Need rest!

Stealing Georgia? (Limerick)

Friday, October 12th, 2018

Kemp’s afraid that more Georgians might vote,
So he blocks them from regist’ring. Note,
He’s intent on defeating
Ms. Abrams by cheating
To keep his Gov prospects afloat.

Donald The Prognosticator (Limerick)

Wednesday, September 19th, 2018

WP Headline: “Trump’s insistence on an upcoming ‘red wave’ could make a blue wave higher”

I enjoy watching Donald emote
About upcoming mid-terms; he’ll gloat
About wins and successes.
My hope and best guess is
His base will think “no need to vote!”

The GOP’s “Blue Wave” Blues (Limerick)

Thursday, August 9th, 2018

Headline: “4 signs of a blue wave from Election Day: Republicans should be running scared”

Most Republican leaders see Trump
As creating a GOP slump.
But not Donald! He’ll brag
And pretend the “Trump drag”
Is “fake news,” as our “blue wave” odds jump.