Archive for January, 2013

Limerick Ode To Tom Harkin

Monday, January 28th, 2013

Here’s a headline I sure didn’t want to read: Veteran Iowa Sen. Tom Harkin to retire after the 2014 elections.

Harkin, a staunch liberal who advocated for serious filibuster reform, announced his retirement very shortly after Sen. Harry Reid caved and made a pathetically week filibuster “reform” deal with Sen. Mitch McConnell.

While I’m no mind reader, I’m betting the two are connected.

Limerick Ode To Tom Harkin
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Tom Harkin is stepping aside.
His loss will be hard to abide.
I blame Reid, cuz he blew
His big chance for some true
Filibuster reform, which has died!

Limerick Ode To McCain, The Conciliator

Tuesday, January 22nd, 2013

Republican pols, most notably John McCain, didn’t find Obama’s second inaugural address sufficiently conciliatory. Here’s McCain:

“There was very little reaching out to the other side,” he said. “It was a fine speech, but I didn’t hear any conciliatory remarks. I didn’t see any specific reference like, ‘I reach out my hand to the other side of the aisle.’ “

Limerick Ode To McCain, The Conciliator
By Madeleine Begun Kane

As Obama’s Inaugural wraps,
John McCain now complains of a lapse:
Just where in the speech
Does the President reach
Cross the aisle to invite some more slaps?

The NRA Plays Games (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 15th, 2013

After yesterday’s Weapon Wonderland Song Parody, I thought I was done with gun posts for a while. But I guess not:

The NRA Plays Games (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“Violent video games are to blame,”
Claims the NRA, much to its shame.
Then it issues its own,
Meant for kids barely grown.
Yes, hypocrisy’s NRA’s name.

UPDATE: There’s some speculation that the National Rifle Association may not be behind this app. However, thus far, the NRA hasn’t disowned it.

Weapon Wonderland Song Parody

Monday, January 14th, 2013

You can hear me attempt to sing my Weapon Wonderland song parody a cappella here. But since I have a lousy voice, it might be safest to just read my parody lyrics:

Weapon Wonderland Song Parody (to be sung to Winter Wonderland)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Gun sales surge. Are you listenin’?
Ammunition keeps glistenin’.
They’re arming tonight and causing a fright.
U.S. Constitution arms the land.

People die for no reason.
Children shot! ‘Tis the season.
A terrible blight, each night after night.
Gun rights absolutists harm our land.

NRA and cronies claim our homeland
Must allow their arms in every town,
Claiming guns will help us.
We say “No man!
“The murder stats have got to go way down.”

Weapon fans have conspired.
Now our nation is mired.
With lives we have paid.
New laws must be made.
Or soon we’ll have a gun in every hand.

(Linked at DVerse Poets)

White House Diversity’s Owed (Limerick)

Thursday, January 10th, 2013

I have nothing against white guys. (Some of my best husbands are white guys.) But President Obama’s second term appointments are really starting to annoy me.

White House Diversity’s Owed (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Where’s Obama’s diversity minder–
His “qualified female” staff finder?
He’s named white guys galore
To positions top-drawer.
Perhaps he should borrow Mitt’s binder.

A Driving Attack On Corporate Personhood (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 8th, 2013

I can’t help admiring the audacity and creativity of this fellow’s Citizens United-inspired legal argument:

A driver in San Rafael, California is attempting to appeal a traffic citation for driving alone in a High Occupancy Vehicle lane. Jonathan Frieman and his attorney, Ford Greene, argue that since Frieman had corporate incorporation papers in his car when he was stopped by an officer, he was actually carpooling at the time…

He’s sworn to chase the case all the way to the Supreme Court should the first trial not go his way in an attempt to “expose the impracticality of corporate personhood.”

A Driving Attack On Corporate Personhood (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I’m not driving alone, said the guy
In the HOV lane, and here’s why:
Corp’rate personhood rules,
And my corp files, you fools,
Are right here. My defense — you must buy!

Batty Birthers Are Gunning For … Justice Roberts??? (Limerick)

Monday, January 7th, 2013

The Birthers are making trouble once again:

The reliably unhinged crazies over at WorldNetDaily have a new axe to grind when it comes to their tiresome obsession with proving that President Obama is not legally entitled to serve in the office he’s held for four years and counting. Their latest gambit involves insisting that Chief Justice John Roberts is violating the Constitution by administering the oath of office to the president for the second time on January 21, and warning that he will be subject to “impeachment and eternal dishonor” if he does so.

Batty Birthers Are Gunning For … Justice Roberts??? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The birthers are at it again:
Stop Barack’s Oval swear-in, their yen.
Oath of office — abort,
They John Roberts exhort.
Seems impeachment’s their wet dream — both men.

Limerick Ode To Hillary Haters

Tuesday, January 1st, 2013

Now that Hillary Clinton has been diagnosed with a blood clot in her head, Jeff Greenfield asks an excellent question:

Wonder if those sarcastically doubting Sec. Clinton’s health will have the decency to apologize….I’m not exactly holding my breath.

Limerick Ode To Hillary Haters
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The haters are out to get Hill,
Spewing venom and meanness and swill,
Asserting with shrillness,
“She’s faking her illness!”
Is a blood clot sufficiently ill?