Archive for the ‘Glenn Beck Satire’ Category

Political Tidbits

Saturday, March 21st, 2015

Glenn Beck just announced that he’s quitting the Republican Party.

It seems the GOP isn’t quite crazy enough for him.


To prove he really means it this time, Donald Trump is forming a presidential exploratory committee.

Some circuses just can’t have too many rings.


Dear Rand Paul, I don’t live in Kentucky,
And I think that you’re far worse than yucky.
Why’s your newsletter clogging
My email and dogging
My bandwidth with viewpoints so sucky?


Facts can be pesky
and undermine views.
But the right just discards them
like old, worn out shoes.


In a Playboy interview, Dick Cheney said Obama is “the worst president of my lifetime”.

I could have sworn that title belonged to Cheney.


Why don’t I call
the GOP pols heartless?
I hate redundancy.


Re Matt McLaughlin’s gays-killing CA ballot initiative, doesn’t his “Sodomite Suppression Act” deserve a “Matt McLaughlin Suppression Act?”

Alaska Republican Rep. Don Young suggested letting wolves loose to cure the homeless problem.

What a foxy way to angle for a job at Fox News!


The duped marks wallow
in hollow crap they swallow
from pols they follow.


Conservative commentator Dinesh D’Souza has denounced Hillary Clinton’s “lawlessness.”

But I think D’Souza is just lonely serving time for violating campaign finance laws.


Sudden clarity
of thought and reason in pols–
Can’t a gal dream?


Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker has signed a “Right-to-Work” law, a/k/a the “Right to Destroy Unions by Reaping Benefits Without Paying Dues” law.


GOP hucksters
hock our nation’s future
to gain/maintain power.


It’s Kristol Clear That Beck Is Nuts

Tuesday, February 8th, 2011

I, for one, am enjoying the Bill Kristol / Glenn Beck feud:

Last week, Fox News’ Glenn Beck launched a week-long effort to explain developments in Egypt as only he can. The deranged media personality cooked up truly bizarre conspiracy theories — even by his standards…

Over the weekend, The Weekly Standard’s William Kristol, a Fox News contributor, had seen enough. “[H]ysteria is not a sign of health,” Kristol wrote in a new column. “When Glenn Beck rants about the caliphate taking over the Middle East from Morocco to the Philippines, and lists (invents?) the connections between caliphate-promoters and the American left, he brings to mind no one so much as Robert Welch and the John Birch Society. He’s marginalizing himself, just as his predecessors did back in the early 1960s.”

Now let’s face it — Glenn Beck’s behavior has to be pretty crazy for a neoconservative like Kristol to write that sort of critique. And that brings me to my latest limerick:

It’s Kristol Clear That Beck Is Nuts
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Bill Kristol said Beck’s gone too far,
Which means Glenn’s scaled a very high bar.
Cuz when Bill says enough
To a wingnut, that’s rough.
Yes, Glenn’s sanity’s way under par.

My Dream For Glenn Beck … And America

Thursday, August 26th, 2010

I have a dream that one day crazed liars like Glenn Beck will no longer pollute our television and radio waves and the Internet.

I have a dream that one day the American people will stop being suckered by deranged media personalities like Glenn Beck.

I have a dream that one day Glenn Beck will headline a rally like his “restore honor” to America rally scheduled on the anniversary of Martin Luther King’s “I Have A Dream Speech” … and nobody will show up.

My Dream For Glenn Beck … And America (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Oh, I have a dream for Glenn Beck:
That he’ll lose his unending blank check
To spread mad, evil lies
That are greeted as wise,
When they’re really insidious dreck.

Glenn Beck, Keep Your Grubby Paws Off Yom Kippur

Tuesday, September 22nd, 2009

I may be a non-practicing Jew, but I’m deeply offended by Glenn Beck’s attempt to co-opt and politicize Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the Jewish year.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Glenn Beck, Keep Your Grubby Paws Off Yom Kippur
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Mr. Beck, you are bad to the bone,
So it’s time that you start to atone.
And stop trying to steal
Jewish holy days. Heel!
Kindly leave all my people alone.

UPDATE: Don Davis says: Forget Yom Kippur, Glenn Beck Declares A National Circumcision Day.

Related Post: Bill O’Reilly’s Faux War On Christmas — Song Parody

Chris Wallace Feels Dissed

Saturday, September 19th, 2009

Poor Chris Wallace has been whining to Bill O’Reilly about Fox News Sunday not getting an Obama interview. Apparently Obama’s making a huge mistake in refusing to be interviewed by such a fair fellow.

My favorite part of the video is where Wallace calls Obama’s White House, “The biggest bunch of crybabies I have dealt with in my 30 years in Washington.”

Yup, sounds “fair and balanced” to me.

This calls for a limerick, don’t you think?

Chris Wallace Feels Dissed
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Chris Wallace is feeling left out—
No Obama appearance to tout.
Wallace swears on the air:
He’s not Beck. He is fair
To those “crybabies.” Why would we doubt?

Related Post: Fox Pundits At Sea

Fox Pundits At Sea

Monday, April 13th, 2009

Fox News “pundit” rants always look foolish, especially when they’re packed with gleeful predictions of Democratic failures. And most especially when their predictions turn out to be dramatically wrong.

Such, thankfully, was the case with the loony rantings indulged in by Newt Gingrich, Glenn Beck and sundry Fox News personalities who “bet against the Obama administration’s ability to rescue Richard Phillips, the American ship captain who was taken hostage by Somali pirates.”

How those Fox nuts salivated in anticipation of Obama’s failure! And how disappointed they must surely be in the wake of Phillips’ rescue after the Obama-authorized killing of three pirates.

I, for one, don’t expect any gracious apologies any time soon. Do you?

Fox Pundits At Sea (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Obama’s been tested and won.
Three pirates were killed with a gun.
Now will loons who foretold
That he’d fail to be bold
Say they’re sorry, congrats, job well done?