Archive for November, 2010

Premature Concession Syndrome — A Remedial Limerick

Tuesday, November 30th, 2010

I’ve finally figured out what’s wrong with President Obama: He suffers from PCS (Premature Concession Syndrome.) The latest example is his proposed federal employee wage freeze. But as Rachel Maddow said last night in her Charlie Brown commentary: “This White House consistently gives up its concessions at the start, before getting anything in return.”

Here’s hoping this open limerick to President Obama helps:

Premature Concession Syndrome — A Remedial Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Obama, it’s Law 101
That in deal making don’t jump the gun:
Never give stuff away
With the hope that one day
You might get something back — this ain’t done.

Your opponent will simply want more.
He will threaten to walk out the door
Unless you accede
To his limitless greed.
Learn this rule or you never will score.

You claim that you earned a JD.
I’ve got one of my own, so you see
Why I don’t understand
How you fail to demand
Quid pro quo from the damn GOP.

Palin Unveils Our Newest Ally — North Korea

Wednesday, November 24th, 2010

Whenever I think Sarah Palin can’t get more stupid, she proves me wrong. This time she actually said:

But obviously, we’ve got to stand with our North Korean allies. We’re bound to by treaty –.

(Her co-host on Glenn Beck’s radio show corrected her.)

She has earned herself yet another limerick:

Palin Unveils Our Newest Ally — North Korea
By Madeleine Begun Kane

North Korea’s an ally, says Palin.
Her brain cells have clearly been bailin’.
Though her knowledge is weak,
She hastens to speak
With her fact-free assurance prevailin’.

(I have lots more Sarah Palin humor here.)

An Open Limerick To Airline Passengers

Tuesday, November 23rd, 2010

My open limerick to the traveling public was inspired by this article about gynecological pat-downs and this letter from physicist Rep. Rush Holt, which questions the safety of full body scan technology:

An Open Limerick To Airline Passengers
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Airline riders, it’s time to speak out.
The TSA rules we must flout.
Radiation or mauling —
They both are appalling.
To submit gives the terrorists clout.

(You can find my Pat-Down Put-Down limerick here.)

An Ode To The Grand Old Sabotage Party

Monday, November 22nd, 2010

Are Republicans putting party before country? Are they deliberately sabotaging the economy and undermining our nation? Steve Benen makes a convincing case that that’s exactly what they are doing.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

An Ode To The Grand Old Sabotage Party
By Madeleine Begun Kane

For a GOP rise to the peak,
The economy must remain weak.
With the White House their goal
They gave up their soul,
Ensuring our future stays bleak.

Sarah Palin Edict: Reality show contestants without talent must not compete … unless their last name is Palin.

Thursday, November 18th, 2010

Once again, Sarah Palin shows she has no sense of shame or irony. In her new book America By Heart, the woman has the audacity to criticize American Idol singers as “talent-deprived” contestants who suffer from “the cult of self-esteem.” Now mind you, this is the very same woman whose talentless daughter Bristol has been making a spectacle of herself on Dancing With The Stars.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

There’s a cult of no-talent, rants Palin.
How ironic’s her Idol show railin’!
With a daughter whose dancing
Is talentless prancing,
What’s next? Bristol’s Idol show wailin’?

(I have lots more Sarah Palin humor here.)

Pat-Down Put-Down

Tuesday, November 16th, 2010

Sorry I’ve been so quiet lately. But I have a great excuse: Mark and I went on the first annual Lewis Black Comedy Cruise. You can read all about our fun comedy cruise adventures here.

But now it’s time to get back to the work of political mockery. Fortunately, I’ve returned from my travels just in time to make fun of the TSA’s delightful new privacy-invading screening procedures. And I’m still trying to figure out which I prefer as my ticket to plane boarding: a “nude body scan or genital groping.”

That brings me to my latest limerick:

Pat-Down Put-Down
By Madeleine Begun Kane

You’re a teen and can’t get to first base?
You’re a fondler, but fearful of Mace?
Well a pat-down career
Can be yours. (Front and rear.)
Be a TSA Feel-Her-Up Ace.

Election Results Madness Limerick Audio

Wednesday, November 3rd, 2010

It’s nearly 2 a.m. here in New York City, and most of the national election news is bleak. I’m so upset, I can barely write:

Election Results Madness (Audio Version)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I’m glued to the screen through the night,
Watching Dem after Dem lose our fight.
Masochistic? I guess:
Can’t stop watching this mess.
Where the hell is this long tunnel’s light?