Archive for the ‘Campaign Humor’ Category

Trump’s Donation Scam (Limerick)

Monday, April 5th, 2021

Headline: “How Trump Steered Supporters Into Unwitting Donations”

Donald Trump raked in money; a mint
From his fans, who had nary a hint
Of the sums they had given.
To shock they were driven
By boxes (pre-checked) and small print.

The Meddling “Former Guy” (Limerick)

Thursday, March 4th, 2021

“Republicans are sounding the alarm that his attempts to meddle in primaries could hurt the party’s efforts to win back the majority”

GOPers are worried and fretting;
They’re afraid that Trump’s meddling’s abetting
The Dems in the House.
For they bet on a louse,
Whose candidate picks have them sweating.

Obsequious Republicans (Limerick)

Monday, February 15th, 2021

GOPers are weary and sick
Of defending that scurrilous Dick.
Yet they’re loath to abort
Their debased Trump support.
Are they cowards, or frauds? Take your pick!

Two-Faced Mitch (Limerick)

Monday, February 15th, 2021

Mitch is trying to have it both ways:
First he joins in the “Don’t Convict!” nays.
Then he spouts a critique
Of Trump’s actions, with pique.
For hypocrisy (rank!) he wants praise?

In Acquitting Trump, GOP Senators Acquit Themselves Poorly (Limerick)

Sunday, February 14th, 2021

Trump’s acquittal by GOP wimps
Gave us more than a generous glimpse
At pols who enrolled
In the “Trump Cult” and sold
Off their souls; fawning wretches and simps!

Yet Another “If Trump Could Write Limericks”

Thursday, February 11th, 2021

With Trump finally out of office, I thought I was done writing “If Trump Could Write Limericks.” But apparently not.

So my crowd got a bit out of hand?
No big deal! I would never command
Them to kill, even maim,
And my language was tame.
This impeachment hoax ought to be banned!

Them’s Fightin’ Words! (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 9th, 2021

Headline: “Trump’s impeachment lawyers argue he only wanted supporters to ‘fight’ in ‘the figurative sense'”

Trump repeatedly told his mob “Fight!”
But he claims that he never meant “Smite!”
Funny thing though: his crowd
(MAGA-Cultish and Proud)
Clearly knew how to earn Trump’s delight.

Trump’s Case, In Brief (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 3rd, 2021

Trump denies he incited a coup;
Says his voter fraud claims are all true;
And rejects any blame.
But the rioters claim:
“We did JUST what Trump told us to do.”

My Limerick Question Of The Day

Monday, February 1st, 2021

Embracing the fringe politicians
(Pols enamored of lies and seditions)
Is the GOP’s course.
Will this soon be its source
Of failing electoral missions?

Republican Appeasement (Limerick)

Monday, February 1st, 2021

GOPers, dishonest and lazy,
Keep appeasing the evil and crazy;
They excuse acts and views
Of both Trump cult and Qs.
That’s why GOP prospects look hazy.

Kevin McCarthy Makes Nicey-Nicey With Trump (Limerick)

Thursday, January 28th, 2021

Headline: “McCarthy Kisses Trump’s Ring After Briefly Acknowledging Ex-POTUS’s Role In Insurrection”

Rep. McCarthy’s still kissing the ring
Of the Donald — a very odd thing.
You’d expect some disquiet
From Donald Trump’s riot…
Which endangered both left and right wing.

Georgia On His Mind (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 5th, 2021

Headline: “Judge Shoots Down Last-Ditch Trump Lawsuit Looking to Overturn Georgia Loss”

Poor Donald keeps losing in court;
Filing spurious suits is his forte.
Each “disgraceful” court loss
Makes him bitter and cross,
As Trump’s time in the Oval grows short.

The Stubborn Myth Of The Stolen Election (Limerick)

Sunday, December 27th, 2020

Donald’s myth of a stolen election
Lives on, though debunked; no injection
Of fact removes fiction.
Despite contradiction,
Convictions spurn falsehood detection.

Mitch Finally Admits Biden Won (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 16th, 2020

Mitch McConnell should show some contrition
For his way overdue recognition
That the winner is Joe;
This delay helped Trump sow
Mass suspicion and threats of sedition.

Whiner-In-Chief Still Whining (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 15th, 2020

Says Donald, they’re all out to get me;
RINO judges and staffers won’t let me
Overturn and undo
Biden’s “win.” I should sue
The whole crew cuz they failed to abet me.

Time’s Up! (Limerick)

Saturday, December 12th, 2020

Dear Donald, enough with your moaning
And bitching and whining and groaning!
Your lies about wins
Lead a long list of sins.
My suggestion: Some prison atoning.

Denying The Undeniable (Limerick)

Friday, December 11th, 2020

I despise all the “Biden Deniers;”
Those sniveling cowards and liars,
Who follow, unthinking,
Trump’s lead without blinking.
It’s high time that the Trump Cult retires.

Swindler-In-Chief (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 9th, 2020

It’s over; Trump knows that he lost,
But he’ll keep filing suits that are tossed,
Cuz as long as his base
Thinks he still has a case,
They will fund him, whatever the cost.

Con-Man-In-Chief (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 2nd, 2020

Headline: “Trump and crew cash in with election fraud ‘scare stories'”

Vile Donald is making a pile
From election fraud lies filled with bile;
Our nation’s chief sleaze,
Via fund-raising pleas,
Is still bilking his marks Trumpy-style.

Delicate-Flower-In-Chief (Limerick)

Monday, November 30th, 2020

Poor Donald’s a delicate flower;
The mere thought of his loss makes him glower.
So he lies and brings suits;
Claims they’re all in cahoots
To prevent him from staying in power.