Archive for the ‘Campaign Humor’ Category

Limerick Ode To Republican Hypocrisy

Tuesday, September 22nd, 2020

“Toobin: McConnell engaging in ‘greatest act of hypocrisy in American political history’ with Ginsburg replacement vote”

I despise all the brazen hypocrisy
From Republican pols. Seems democracy
Has been callously cast
Aside. I’m aghast
At their theo-and-corpora-tocracy.

Mask Mandate Madness (Limerick)

Wednesday, September 16th, 2020

Headline: “Biden on Trump’s Attack on Him for Not Introducing Mask Mandate: ‘To Be Clear, I Am Not Currently President’”

“Where’s the national mandate for masks
Biden promised to give us?” Trump asks.
For logic, I mourn,
Cuz I sure could have sworn
That’s among Donald’s President-tasks.

Trump’s Killer Instinct (Limerick)

Tuesday, September 15th, 2020

Headline: “Trump ignores science at dangerous indoor rally”

Donald’s base should start writing their wills,
Cuz he feeds on large audience thrills;
Crammed together indoors,
Scanty masks, chair-filled floors.
Donald Trump doesn’t care whom he kills.

Ante Up! (Limerick)

Tuesday, September 8th, 2020

Ante up, if you’re anti the guy
In the White House. You surely know why:
If we fail to vote out
That liar and lout,
Bid all that is good a goodbye.

Voting-Fraudster-In-Chief (Limerick)

Thursday, September 3rd, 2020

Headline: “Trump Committed Felony Urging Supporters to Vote Twice”

Donald Trump told supporters: “Vote twice,”
Which is awful, unlawful advice.
His words aren’t just flawed;
He’s encouraging fraud.
Yet another Trump crime with no price.

Pious Donald (Limerick)

Sunday, August 30th, 2020

Dear Donald, it’s Sunday today.
How was church? Did you mask-lessly pray?
Oh that’s right — church is just
A photo-op must.
“We want GOD!”? A fake-pious display.

Another Promise Unkept (Limerick)

Friday, August 28th, 2020

Trump way back in 2016: “I am the law and order candidate.”

“Law and Order’s” a Trump campaign vow,
But the promise that Trump’s making now
Is a ’16 repeat
That he broke. So unseat
Donald Trump and let Joe take a bow.

Pandemic? WHAT Pandemic? (Limerick)

Friday, August 28th, 2020

Headline: “Trump Pretends Pandemic Is Over”

Donald Trump and his cronies pretend
That COVID has come to an end.
But magical thinking
Solves nothing: No shrinking
Of death counts — infections ascend.

Trump-Logic (Limerick)

Friday, August 28th, 2020

Blaming Biden for civil unrest
Falls afoul of ye old straight-face test.
Cuz the last time I checked
Trump was prez, and he’s wrecked
Our great nation. (So much for “Be Best.”)

Limerick Ode To The Liar-In-Chief

Tuesday, August 25th, 2020

“Dems will steal the election,” says Trump —
A small part of his regular dump
Of bald fabrications
In Donald’s orations;
Our Liar-In-Chief on the stump.

The Trump Cult (Limerick)

Monday, August 24th, 2020

“In lieu of a party platform, Republicans express ‘strong support’ of Trump.”

The GOP seems to exult
In becoming the Donald Trump Cult.
No platform this year —
Just a Donald Trump cheer;
Lots of toadies, but not one adult!

If Susan B. Anthony Could Write Limericks

Tuesday, August 18th, 2020

“President Donald Trump on Tuesday signed a pardon for women’s suffrage icon Susan B. Anthony, who was arrested in 1872 for casting a ballot when women could not vote.”

Dear Donald, your pardon’s rejected;
I despise pardonees you’ve protected!
Stop pretending to care
About gals, and don’t dare
Use my pardon to get reelected.

Trump’s Executive “Order” Scam (Limerick)

Monday, August 10th, 2020

Washington Post Headline: “Here’s what is actually in Trump’s four executive orders

The details on payroll taxes, unemployment and evictions are not as generous as he made them sound.”

Dear Donald, how sneakily clever!
Will your “orders” help voters? No never!
But your base who’s unschooled
In the law may be fooled
By your “efforts” while pulling that lever.

Rally Folly (Limerick)

Monday, June 22nd, 2020

Dear Donald, you seem to be sad
Cuz that rally in Tulsa was BAD.
Your turnout was poor–
A shanda full-bore–
Just deserts for a self-dealing cad.

Irrational Polls (Limerick)

Friday, March 27th, 2020

Headline: “Trump’s Approval Jumps Five Points”

A rise in the Donald’s approval
Transcends logic; he merits removal!
Such a gain in our national
Polls is irrational…
As peculiar as numbers from Liouville.*

*If you don’t understand my reference to mathematician Joseph Liouville, here’s a helpful link. And no, I’d never heard of him before, either. But when you’re desperate for a rhyme word, sometimes you have to research math.

Applauding Mayor Pete (Limerick)

Sunday, March 1st, 2020

I’m bracing for the angry comments likely to come my way:

Mayor Pete, thanks for ending your race.
Though it isn’t your time, you’re an ace.
By shrinking your lane,
The “Stop Bernie” train
Might succeed — that’s the challenge we face.

That “Perfect” Ukraine Call (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 8th, 2019

The Donald insists on defending
That infamous phone call, pretending
There was “no quid pro quo” —
It was “perfect.” E’en so,
I predict it’s the start of Trump’s ending.

Limerick Ode To The Horn-Blower in Chief (Limerick)

Monday, October 7th, 2019

Trump Tweet: “As I have stated strongly before, and just to reiterate, if Turkey does anything that I, in my great and unmatched wisdom, consider to be off limits, I will totally destroy and obliterate the Economy of Turkey (I’ve done before!)…”

Trump’s “wisdom” is “great and unmatched.”
(Donald’s claim via Twitter, dispatched
In a horn-blowing tweet.)
Seems his feed is replete
With proof that Trump’s brain has been snatched.

Limerick Ode To Trump Enablers

Thursday, October 3rd, 2019

Headline: “The Mad King’s Enablers”

Though elected Republicans know
That Trump is unfit, they still show
That their stance is protect
And defend and deflect…
No matter how low Trump will go.

Law-Flouter in Chief (Limerick)

Thursday, October 3rd, 2019

Headline: “Trump Just Committed More High Crimes on the White House Lawn”

For his upcoming ’20 campaign,
Trump solicited help from Ukraine.
China too, as we’ve seen
Right in public! Trump’s keen
To flout laws for his personal gain.