Posts Tagged ‘Twitter Humor’

Limerick Ode To Smart-Ass DeSantis

Thursday, May 25th, 2023

“DeSantis debacle: Twitter Spaces presidential announcement marred by technical problems.”

Smart-Ass Ron: Had you asked someone sane
About venues to launch your campaign,
(S)he’d have warned “Do Not Do
A Twitter Debut!”
(Sound advice you’d have viewed with disdain.)

Manchin Throws His Weight Around (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 24th, 2021

Headline: “Manchin flexes muscle in 50-50 Senate”

Joe Manchin’s extortionate power
In wielding his vote makes me glower.
He’s unreas’nably bold
With threats to withhold
Key votes, hoping Biden will cower.

Budget Director Blues (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 23rd, 2021

Neera Tanden’s Budget Director nomination appears doomed because … “MEAN Tweets!” Double standard, much?

Trump’s Tweeting career was extensive,
His Twitter posts mean and offensive.
Did this mar the support
From his party? (Loud snort!)
But those “MEAN” Tanden tweets? They’re expensive!

Banished and Bereft (Limerick)

Saturday, January 9th, 2021

Donald Trump doesn’t “get” the to-do;
So WHAT if he triggered a coup!
But he’s run out of luck
And for once he can’t duck
The backlash from acts he should rue.

Donald Trump, who’s a bully full-blown,
Lost his bullhorn; his phone’s a mere phone.
No more weapon of choice —
Just a much-weakened voice;
He’s bereft of his base and alone.

Banned At Last (Limerick)

Friday, January 8th, 2021

Donald Trump has been banished from Twitter,
And Donald’s undoubtedly bitter.
His corrupt tweet decorum
Has cost him this forum.
Now how’ll he pass time on the shitter?

Will It Never End? (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 8th, 2020

Enduring Trump’s reign has been hard;
Our nation’s been tainted and scarred.
So this question’s arisen:
Is tweeting in prison
Permitted? Please tell me it’s barred!

Liars Flee “Censorship” (Limerick)

Monday, November 16th, 2020

NY Times Headline: “Fact-Checked on Facebook and Twitter, Conservatives Switch Their Apps

“Since the election, millions have migrated to alternative social media and media sites like Parler, Rumble and Newsmax.”

If you’re fact-checked on Facebook or Twitter,
There’s no need to feel outraged or bitter;
Join Parler or Rumble.
The folks there don’t grumble
At lies. They just spread ’em and titter.

Manic Donald (Limerick)

Wednesday, October 7th, 2020

Headline: “Trump’s Tweeting Even More Erratic Than Usual”

Donald Trump sits atop of the Feds
And behaves like a madman on meds.
His tweets appear manic,
Galvanic, Satanic.
Can I panic at “Off with their heads!”?

The Craziness Never Ends (Quatrain)

Tuesday, March 26th, 2019

Headline: “Trump tweets in official capacity, but blocking users is a personal matter, DOJ argues in court”

Up is down.
Black is white.
A smile’s a frown.
Please, please indict!

Limerick Ode To An Internet Troll

Wednesday, November 28th, 2018

Headline: “Donald Trump, Internet troll”

Is the Donald an Internet troll?
He’s embraced a provocative role
Via lump-of-coal tweets
Filled with lies, memes, and bleats
That betray the huge hole in his soul.

Roseanne Reboot Booted (Limerick)

Tuesday, May 29th, 2018

Roseanne’s tweets are a vile, putrid sump,
So her network has opted to dump
The reboot. She’s expelled
And ironically held
To a much higher standard than Trump.

Our Petulant President (Limerick)

Sunday, May 27th, 2018

Trump dishonors the war dead via Memorial Day Weekend tweets:

On Twitter, Trump’s plaintive today.
To prepare for tomorrow? No way!
It’s not war dead he mourns,
But a “witch hunt” he scorns —
Selfish, petulant Trump on display!

Blockhead Donald’s Failed Blockade (Limerick)

Wednesday, May 23rd, 2018

Headline: “Trump can’t block users on Twitter, federal judge rules”

Poor Trump! How he hates to be mocked
By mean tweets! So he angrily blocked
The accounts of those writers,
Who sued cuz they’re fighters,
And won. Snowflake Donald is focked.

Tweeter-In-Chief (Limerick)

Sunday, August 27th, 2017

The Donald’s still busily tweeting
Whiny drivel and self-serving bleating.
I guess “Sheriff” John Kelly
Let Trump keep his telly…
Which means LOTS more Trump Twitter-excreting.

So Much For That Pivot (3-Verse Limerick)

Saturday, March 4th, 2017

At his speech Tuesday night, Trump seemed sane.
His proposals still sucked, but his brain
And behavior looked stable.
(Less time watching cable?)
Fawning pundits were ably inane:

Trump’s “pivot” was praised by the press,
Who perceived “presidential” finesse.
Heavy meds (I assume)
Might explain his brief bloom
Into something much less of a mess.

But his meds have worn off, I conclude,
Based on stark-raving tweets that he spewed
Just today. Yes his feed
On Twitter indeed
Proves our leader’s a bleeping-mad dude.

Trump’s Favorite Outlet (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 15th, 2017

When Donald gets bitter or pissed,
You can bet he’ll be shaking his fist
Via tweet-storming rants
About leakers and plants.
Before Twitter, how DID he exist?

Those Slippery Polls (Limerick)

Monday, February 6th, 2017

“Any negative polls are fake news.
(Trump on Twitter, expressing his views.)
Yet he can’t explain why
When his numbers are high
They’re plumb right, but when low they’re a ruse.

Donald Tweets To Putin (Limerick)

Friday, December 30th, 2016

This Trump tweet requires a limerick, don’t you think?
“Great move on delay (by V. Putin) – I always knew he was very smart!”

Donald Trump praises Putin as “smart,”
In effect telling Putin, “Take heart;
“Very soon you will own
“The Oval. Just phone
“With instructions. I can’t wait to start.”

Open Limerick To Donald Trump (2-Verse)

Saturday, December 17th, 2016

Dear Donald: Stop bragging and gloating
And mischaracterizing the voting.
Show some dignity. Preening
And boasting’s demeaning.
And so is your crude self-promoting.

You have pulled off remarkable feats,
So enough with the paranoid bleats.
Think twice before speaking
And enemy-tweaking.
And try NOT to launch wars with your tweets!

For Donald, Pettiness Trumps All (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 6th, 2016

It seems likely that Trump’s fact-free, market-skewing anti-Boeing tweet was spurred by yet another petty vendetta. (How dare Boeing’s CEO criticize Trump’s anti-China bluster!)

Donald tweets without int’rest or care
As to damage he’ll cause with each blare.
Petty grievance-borne views
Spark vendetta-spurred spews.
Spook markets? Start wars? C’est la guerre!