Posts Tagged ‘Trump’

Words Matter (Limerick)

Thursday, March 16th, 2017

Donald Trump’s been rebuked once again:

For the second time in two months, two federal judges on Wednesday refused to allow President Trump to impose a travel ban, citing his campaign rhetoric as evidence of an improper desire to prevent Muslims from entering the United States.

Remember when GOP chatter
Taunted Dems with the sentence: “Words matter!”?
Yet it’s rare that they balk
At the Donald’s loose talk…
Which has flattened his bans with a clatter.

Did Trump Leak His Own Return? (Limerick)

Thursday, March 16th, 2017

Trump’s been bitching about the publication of an old 1040 — a partial tax return that actually makes him look like a successful businessman and that does him no real harm. Moreover, he’s called it “fake news,” even though its validity was confirmed by Trump’s own office. So here’s my theory via limerick:

Dear Donald, the news makes you burn,
And your wiretap fib’s in an urn.
Ryan’s plan is a bust,
And distraction’s a must,
So I’m betting YOU leaked your return.

Trump’s Wall (Limerick)

Saturday, March 11th, 2017

Yikes! Trump’s proposed budget pays for his pet wall by raiding the TSA, FEMA, and Coast Guard budgets.

Remember Trump’s thunderous call
For a Mexico-financed “great wall?”
Coast Guard funds, FEMA cash,
And the TSA stash–
Trump will slash them to build it. What gall!

Are you feeling more secure yet?

Limerick Ode To Our Liar-In-Chief

Monday, March 6th, 2017

I used to respond with surprise
Upon hearing Trump’s venom-filled lies,
But his yarns are so chronic
(A self-prescribed tonic?)
That banking on fiction is wise.

About Last Night (Limerick)

Wednesday, March 1st, 2017

The reviews for Trump’s speech, in the main,
Were swell, cuz he seemed to be sane:
He read his speech well;
Did not rant, rave, or yell.
What a low bar we’ve set for his reign.

The Trump Revolt (Limerick)

Monday, February 27th, 2017

Yet another headline that begs for a limerick:
“Donald Trump is creating a field day for the 1%.”

While running, Trump promised to lead
A revolt v. elitists. But heed
Donald’s affluent picks;
Mostly rich, gilt-edged pricks.
His flimflam’s revolting, indeed.

Bracing For Trump’s Speech To Congress (Limerick)

Monday, February 27th, 2017

Although Trump has circulated a bullet point outline of tomorrow night’s speech, here’s what I’m expecting:

Please get ready for Donald to speak
Before Congress on Tuesday this week,
Where he’ll beef about press
And he’ll shriek “We’re a mess,
Only I can address!” (That’s my “leak.”)

Donald Trump, the Anti-Dale Carnegie (Limerick)

Sunday, February 26th, 2017

Have you noticed Trump’s habit of picking random fights with allies? Even France is rightfully peeved at the Donald for Trump’s Paris rant, which included this gem:

“Paris? I don’t go there anymore. Paris is no longer Paris,” Trump quoted his friend as saying.

Donald thoughtlessly tends to digress
Into statements that cause allies stress.
Watch his Cabinet Secs
As they turn into wrecks,
While attempting to clean up each mess.

Trump’s “Fine-Tuned Machine” Limerick

Thursday, February 16th, 2017

A “fine-tuned machine” — that’s how Trump
Says his White House is running. That shlump
Lies as much as he breathes,
As with venom he’s seethes,
While rebranding the White House: “Trump’s Sump.”

Trump’s Favorite Outlet (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 15th, 2017

When Donald gets bitter or pissed,
You can bet he’ll be shaking his fist
Via tweet-storming rants
About leakers and plants.
Before Twitter, how DID he exist?

The View From Trump’s Tweets (Limerick)

Thursday, February 9th, 2017

In the last couple of days, Trump’s been tweet-storming complaints about Senators McCain and Blumenthal, as well as Nordstrom.

So, what’s Trump outraged about (besides the media and the courts?)

1) Sen. McCain criticized Trump’s disastrous Yemen raid.

2) Sen. Blumenthal accurately quoted Judge Gorsuch’s relatively mild criticism of Trump’s anti-judge tweets.

3) Nordstrom dropped Ivanka’s clothing and shoe lines because they aren’t selling well.

How dare they!

Meanwhile, where’s Trump’s outrage at Kellyanne Conway over her blatant violation of federal ethics regulations? Where’s the angry Trump tweet condemning Conway for illegally hawking Ivanka’s products from the White House on a Fox News interview?

Conway’s breach was so egregious, that it was even strongly condemned by Republican Chairman of the House Oversight Committee Jason Chaffetz:

“That was wrong, wrong, wrong,” Chaffetz told NBC News’ Alex Moe. “It is wholly unacceptable — no if, ands or buts about it.” Chaffetz said that he was drafting a bipartisan letter with his Democratic counterpart Elijah Cummings demanding an explanation from the White House.

Yet all we’ve gotten so far is a namby-pamby statement by Sean Spicer, that Trump Counselor Conway “has been counseled.”

John McCain’s raid-remarks made Trump mad.
So did Blumenthal’s Gorsuch quotes. Sad!
Yet Donald seems fine
When his aides cross the line,
As with Conway’s Ivanka-brand ad.

Those Slippery Polls (Limerick)

Monday, February 6th, 2017

“Any negative polls are fake news.
(Trump on Twitter, expressing his views.)
Yet he can’t explain why
When his numbers are high
They’re plumb right, but when low they’re a ruse.

Trump Nominees Versus Trump??? (Limerick)

Friday, January 13th, 2017

My latest limerick was inspired by the stark differences between Trump’s signature campaign promises and the positions of his Cabinet picks.

While under the hearing lights’ glare
Donald’s picks make it clear they don’t share
Major policy views
With their prez. Does he snooze
Through their shmoozes … or simply not care?

Giving Trump His Due (Limerick)

Saturday, November 19th, 2016

Trump supporters have made this demand:
“Respect Trump as the prez of our land.”
Yes give Donald his due:
That same “honor” he threw
At Barack — just deserts for Trump’s brand.

Limerick Ode To A Sorry Apology

Saturday, October 8th, 2016

Trump’s “pussy” apology’s terse!
(The Donald is “sorry” averse.)
“You should give me your votes,”
He shamelessly notes.
“Elect ME, cuz her husband’s done worse.”

Never Judge A Bloke By His Mild-Mannered Cover! (Limerick)

Thursday, October 6th, 2016

Mike Pence is even worse on women’s health issues than I thought: As a Congressman, it was Pence who introduced the first bill to block Planned Parenthood funding. He even fathered the Republican habit of blocking essential bills and threatening government shutdowns over defunding Planned Parenthood. So it’s time for a limerick:

Trump’s a sexist, we rail and we fret,
But here’s something we’d best not forget:
Pence invented the scheme
V. Planned Parenthood. Scream
To the rafters: “Mike Pence is a threat!”

Trump’s Team: “Plane” Incompetent (Limerick)

Tuesday, April 19th, 2016

Prez Trump will be great! You know why?
His reason’s a bit hard to buy:
He will bring a “great team!”
Yet his team it would seem
Can not keep his plane reg’stered to fly.

Open Limerick To Donald Trump

Tuesday, April 19th, 2016

Dear Donald, you whine and seem thrown
By the delegate rules you’d disown.
Being prez is far worse;
More complex and perverse.
So moaning won’t cut it. You’re blown!

Who Knew Trump Could Write Limericks?

Sunday, March 13th, 2016

My supporters are peaceful and sweet.
It’s those protesters causing the heat.
So my fans should feel free
To throw punches. Their fee
For a lawyer’s on me. It’s my treat!