Posts Tagged ‘Trump’

Does Trump Despise His Own Supporters? (Limerick)

Thursday, August 30th, 2018

Headline: “Trump Secretly Despises His Own Supporters”

Donald Trump shows contempt and disdain
For Jeff Sessions; he’ll often complain
That Jeff’s accent and schools
Are both southern. Trump-tools
Are undoubtedly viewed in that vein.

Open Limerick To Folks STILL Defending Trump

Saturday, July 7th, 2018

Do not call me naive or a hick:
Snatching kids from their parents is sick:
If you still defend Trump,
Then you’re worse than a chump.
You don’t care? Then you’re evil or thick.

Trump Chickens Out Of Summit (Limerick)

Thursday, May 24th, 2018

The summit with Kim is a fail
Cuz The Donald’s decided to bail.
Yes the meeting’s been tossed,
But not all has been lost;
The Commem’rative Coin’s still for sale.

Women’s Health News To Make You Gag (Limerick)

Friday, May 18th, 2018

Headline: “New Trump Administration Rule Will Force Doctors to Stop Saying “Abortion””

Planned Parenthood hit once again
Via “gag rule?” Seems Trump has a yen
To use power and wealth
To impair women’s health.
Gals could die from the stroke of his pen.

Donald Digs Yet Another Hole (Limerick)

Friday, March 9th, 2018

The Donald lacks impulse control,
Making damage control his staff’s role.
Trump said “yes” to young Kim
On an ego-filled whim.
Reckless acts, once again, take their toll.

Trump To Meet With Kim Jong-un — OY! (Limerick)

Friday, March 9th, 2018

Always vaunting his deal-making skill,
Trump expects to meet Kim and to kill.
Will he plunder, or blunder?
I worry and wonder
What nuclear secrets he’ll spill.

Not Wright For The EPA! (Limerick)

Saturday, March 3rd, 2018

“Trump EPA Pick Works for Dow Chemical”

Donald’s EPA pick works for Dow,
And all I can say’s “Holy Cow!”
If confirmed, Peter Wright’s
Brand new job’s toxic sites.
Is Dow Chemical happy? And how!

Ode To Donald “Genius” Trump

Sunday, January 7th, 2018

Dear Donald, when people are smart,
And their genius is way off the chart,
They do NOT have to brag
And make ev’ryone gag,
Cuz their brains shine as bright as Descartes.

Trump Versifies (Limerick)

Saturday, January 6th, 2018

How dare the Dems say I’m a bum,
And lazy and crazy and dumb!
I am really, like, smart,
Stable genius with heart.
No collusion! No puppet! They’re scum!

Trump On The Attack

Tuesday, December 26th, 2017

Trump’s attacking his OWN FBI.
And no one should have to ask why:
After decades of sinning,
Capped off by some winning,
His Reckoning Day appears nigh.

Demented Trump (Limerick)

Friday, December 1st, 2017

While speaking, Trump zigzags alarmingly,
Though supporters might swear that it’s “charmingly.”
Is his brain missing sprockets?
’Tween topics he rockets:
Taxes, Kim, taxes, Kim — NOT disarmingly!

Here’s the Trump quote I’m referring to:

“Because these massive tax cuts will be rocket fuel … little rocket man, rocket fuel for the American economy. He is a sick puppy.”

The Distraction Game (Limerick)

Saturday, October 28th, 2017

Mueller’s team has been hustling and humming;
Rumor has it arrests are forthcoming.
While we wait, watch the right,
Armed and eager to fight,
Weave their web of distractions mind-numbing.

The GOP Mantra (Limerick)

Saturday, October 28th, 2017

O! M! G! Trump’s in trouble! Deflect!
Hit the Left with some bullshit. Infect
All the news with confusion
Encourage delusion!
That’s the GOP mantra unchecked.

Mueller’s Halloween Surprise?

Friday, October 27th, 2017

Is Trump in the throes of affrightment
Over news about Mueller’s indictment?
Who’s been charged? We don’t know
Cuz it’s sealed. Even so,
I’m aglow with a growing excitement.

The Trump Threat (Limerick)

Saturday, October 21st, 2017

Is Donald a threat to free press?
Well of course my response must be yes.
But much more is in peril
From President Feral;
There’s no end to his menacing mess.

*****

As I train my brain
on our Oval Office bane,
staying sane’s a strain.

*****

Those Military Bereavement Calls (Limerick)

Wednesday, October 18th, 2017

Making service-death phone calls is tough
And, alas, Donald lacks the right stuff.
So although I believed
He should call the bereaved,
Never mind. They have suffered enough!

Open Limerick To Donald Trump

Thursday, October 5th, 2017

Dear Donald, the news isn’t fiction.
So enough with your “made up” depiction!
It’s your tweets that are fake;
You’re a bum, liar, snake!
How I ache for your fel’ny conviction.

Trump v. The Press (Limerick)

Thursday, October 5th, 2017

Donald Trump’s always fighting a war on
The media, trying to score on
The press via Twitter.
The fellow’s a bitter
And nasty old man and a MORON!

Sundry Trump Limericks & More

Thursday, September 28th, 2017

*****

Politico Headline of the Day: “Trump takes on a new cause: ‘Make the United Nations great'”

I don’t think we can take any more greatness.

*****

This headline deserves a limerick: “Price cut — Health Secy quits after Trump complains of travel ‘optics’”

Price is OUT! Why is Donald so mad?
It’s NOT that Tom’s plane use was bad.
Yes those charters were pricey,
But THAT’S not what’s dicey;
Trump’s upset by the “optics.” Egad!

*****

Trump’s hired a notoriously poor succession of personal lawyers since RussiaGate began. My limerick explains why.

The best lawyers prefer to be paid
YUUUUGE fees, right on time, for their aid,
And they’re bound to be miffed
When they find themselves stiffed…
Which explains why Trump’s DON’T make the grade.

*****

A 2-verse limerick about Trump’s retweeting a vile animation, described here by the LA Times:

“In the first part of the animation Trump retweeted on Sunday, the president is seen in golf attire, teeing off. The second shows footage of Clinton tripping as she boards a plane, with the video altered to show her being struck in the back with a golf ball.”

What’s it take to make Donald feel tough,
Like a fellow who has the right stuff?
Being seen with a swing
That’s so strong, he can fling
A ball, knocking Hill to her duff.

Nothing else can explain his retweet
Of a golf gif that Donald finds neat–
Animation conveying
Misogyny saying:
Striking women at will can’t be beat!

Limericks and Sundry Humor (September 2017)

Thursday, September 14th, 2017

Dear Donald, I wish you’d vamoose
It ain’t safe in DC with you loose.
The whole nation, in fact,
Would at last be less racked,
If you’d simply become a recluse.

*****
The Donald is starting to backtrack
In response to fierce tweets from the whack-track
That their love for him’s gone
Cuz he’s “Amnesty Don.”
DACA deal with the Dems? Cue sad sack-track.

*****

The media’s only too glad
To opine that Trump’s pivoting. Sad!
Though he turns on a dime,
Those ain’t pivots; Each time
It’s a sign he’s insane. The guy’s MAD!

*****

CNN Headline of the Day: “Trump has nominated 42 people for US attorney. Only one is a woman”

No doubt Ivanka is VERY disappointed.

*****

Devastating Hurricane: “WRONG Time To Mention Climate Change!”

Mass Shooting: “WRONG Time To Mention Gun Control!”

Anyone detect a pattern here?
*****

Headline of the Day: “Upbeat Trump raves to Schumer, Pelosi about news coverage of their deal”

Donald loves to be praised in the press,
Which is rare, cuz his reign is a mess.
But the deal he just made
With the Democrats paid
Off in cov’rage that’s easing his stress.

Seems the same can’t be said for old Mitch
And Paul Ryan. (Betrayal’s a bitch!)
With high hopes for some wins,
They put up with Trump’s sins.
Their reward? They’ve been dumped in a ditch.

******
Press Query: What will you do about X?
Trump: We’ll see.
Child’s Query: Can I do X? Can I? Can I?
Parent: We’ll see.

*****
Trump has a long history of taking undeserved credit for donations. Will Hurricane Harvey be yet another example?

Do not rush to give Trump an ovation
For his one million dollar “donation”
To victims of Harvey;
Though pledges are marvy,
Please buck promise and payment conflation.

******
Trump proclaimed he’d treat Dreamers “with heart,”
But his vow was a lie from the start.
Dumping DACA, he’s dashed
All their dreams; hope’s been smashed
By a bigot who’s slashed us apart.

*****

This probably sounds cynical, given Trump’s obvious instability.

But despite Donald’s mental unfitness, I don’t believe the powers that be will ever use the 25th Amendment to remove him from the presidency.

Hence my limerick rant:

Has the Donald succumbed to a funk?
Is his psyche okay? Oh what bunk!
Why fret NOW? It’s too LATE!
Foolish votes sealed our fate.
That ship’s sailed and, alas, we are sunk.

*****
Is anyone else sick of stories claiming that Ivanka and Jared tried really, really hard to get Trump to do the right thing?

Poor Ivanka and Jared are sad,
Once again disappointed by dad
After trying sooooo hard.
If you buy this canard,
You’re as blind as daft Donald is mad.

*****

Two-Verse Limerick:

Have you read Donald’s tweet-rants today,
Aimed at partners of DPRK?
They clearly were meant
To scare China. Trump’s vent
Was a threat to stop trade. Foolish bray!

Even Donald would rather not crash
Our economy. That would be rash.
So his threat to stop trade
With China charade
Is naught but nonsensical trash.

*****

Trump to Pence: I saw photos of you in Houston, hugging Harvey victims and clearing debris.

Pence: Just doing my part, Mr. President.

Trump: Stop trying to make me look bad!

*****

Dearest Trump fans, condemning Obama
For Katrina, with Sturm, Drang, and drama,
Is a waste of Snopes’ time.
Dopey gripes are a crime.
Did he also cause Black Tuesday trauma?

*****

Dear Donald, I hope you’re aware
That you’re poor at pretending to care.
Though some suckers still buy
Ev’ry pretense and lie,
Being selfish is all that you share.

*****

Trump: “Harvey. It sounds like such an innocent name, but isn’t.”

Me: Donald. It sounds like such an innocent name, but isn’t.

*****

Trump on the Hurricane Harvey recovery: “We want to do it better than ever before. We want to be looked at in five years or 10 years from now as this is the way to do it.”

I, for one, am looking forward to all the congratulatory phone calls Trump will be inventing.

*****

Pro-brutality, favors rascality,
Can’t accept or contend with reality,
Badly raised, must be praised,
His mentality’s crazed;
Trump’s normality — national malady.

*****

FEMA Adviser: The Dallas Convention Center will house 5000 Harvey refugees.

TRUMP: Unacceptable! I’ve banned ALL refugees!

*****

Journalist: During the campaign, you claimed to have no dealings with Russia.

Trump: That’s right, and I didn’t!

Journalist: Then how do you explain your Moscow Trump Tower “letter of intent?”

Trump: I INTENDED to have dealings. Bigly different!

*****