Archive for July, 2007

Chinese Exports — The Real Poop

Monday, July 30th, 2007

I was a bit grossed out to learn that “The Chengdu Giant Panda Breeding Base has come up with a  dung-for-profit scheme that turns droppings from the endangered species into odour-free souvenirs ranging from bookmarks to Olympic-themed statues… .”   Such creative marketing cries out for a limerick, don’t you think?

Chinese Exports — The Real Poop
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Did that Chinese-made gift make you whoop?
I must warn you — they may have used poop.
I mean panda dung. Yuck!
Don’t want giftware that’s muck?
Well, at least they don’t use it for soup.

(You can find more of my animal related poems and humor here.)

Every Bushie’s Testimony Summed Up In A Single Limerick

Tuesday, July 24th, 2007

Alberto Gonzales is but one of the Bushie liars and Bush enablers whose Congressional hearing testimony can be summarized by this limerick: 

Every Bushie’s Testimony Summed Up In A Single Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“Don’t recall, don’t remember, can’t say
What I did or I said on that day.
But I happily swear
On the life of ma mère,
I did nothing that’s wrongful.  No way!”

(You can find more of my Gonzales satire here, my legal humor here, and my limericks and other satirical verse here.)

UPDATE: Don’t forget to vote in my Bush Impeachment Poll! [tags]Bushies, Liars, Congressional Testimony, Senate Testimony, House Testimony, Senate Hearings, House Hearings, Deposition Humor, Subpoena Satire, Bush Cheney Administration, Bush Enablers, Convenient Memory, Alberto Gonzales, Gonzo, Liars[/tags]

Political Madness Bush Impeachment Poll

Sunday, July 22nd, 2007

I’ve been itching to impeach Bush for as long as I remember.  In fact, I’m starting to lose track  of all the song parodies, poems, and limericks I’ve written on the topic. 

I’ve also been itching to post polls here and I figured why not start with an impeachment poll. And now that I’ve found this very cool Democracy WordPress poll plugin, here’s my first ever poll. (You can also find this poll on my sidebar.)


UPDATE:  I’m running a far less controversial poll at my other non-political humor blog. [tags]Impeach, Impeachment Poll, Impeach Bush, Impeach Cheney, WordPress Poll, Impeachment Song Parody, Impeachment Verse, Impeachment Poems, Impeachment Limericks, Democracy WordPress Poll Plugin, Sidebar Poll[/tags]

Probing Question (Haiku)

Saturday, July 21st, 2007

Requisite Bush colonoscopy snark:

Dick Cheney’s in charge
While George Bush is unconscious.
How’s this day different…?

(You can find more of my news haiku here.) [tags]President Bush, VP Cheney, Bush Colonoscopy, Bush Snark, Politics Haiku [/tags]

Yet Another Filibuster Song Parody (The Full-a-Bluster Song)

Tuesday, July 17th, 2007

Remember when the Republican majority flipped out at the mere whisper of the word filibuster? Remember when GOPers led by Bill Frist, Mitch McConnell, and Trent Lott threatened the “nuclear option” if Democrats had the audacity to filibuster any of George Bush’s extremist judicial nominees?

Those were heady days back then, when Republicans would scream “Up or down vote!” and decry Democrats as “obstructionists,” and the media would obediently parrot their condemnations. Oh yes … and the Democrats caved and failed to filibuster, giving us a whole slew of rightwingnut federal judges who will haunt us for many decades to come.

Well now that the Republicans are the minority party they just love the filibuster and have conveniently forgotten that they ever condemned it.

Back when filibusters were “bad,” I wrote a filibuster song parody to the French-Canadian children’s song Alouette.  Somehow it seems like a good time for a new set of lyrics to the same tune:

The Full-a-Bluster Song
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Ban the filibuster!”
Ancient bluster
from the GOP.

With a Dem majority
Republicans think differently:
“Great device!
Ain’t it nice.
Blocks Dem bills!
They’re all on ice.”


Suddenly has luster.
Grand Old Party’s
Hack Hypocrisy. 

(You can find more of my political song parodies here.)[tags]Filibuster, GOP Hypocrisy, Trent Lott, Mitch McConnell, Bill Frist, Song Parody, Republicans, Iraq War, Nuclear Option, Up Or Down Vote, Obstructionism, Judicial Nominees[/tags]

An AWOL Email

Monday, July 16th, 2007


Subject: Our “Pretty Please Pretend To Plan to End The Iraq War Eventually” Proposal

Thanks bunches for making the rounds yesterday with all that Bush veto talk. Karl was right!  It was just what we needed to make antsy constituents think our amendment actually does something. [tags]Stephen Hadley, Senator Richard Lugar, Senator John Warner, Karl Rove[/tags]

Just One More

Sunday, July 15th, 2007

Teenage Bush: Just one more toke.

Businessman Bush: Just one more beer.

President Bush: Just one more surge. [tags]George Bush Addiction, Dry Drunk, President Bush Satire[/tags]

Where’s James Dobson When You Need Him?

Sunday, July 15th, 2007

Something tells me that James Dobson and his Focus on the Family most definitely wouldn’t approve of this. [tags]James Dobson, Focus On The Family, Marriage Protection[/tags]

Message: I Share … Your Goals. (Bush to the Revolting Republicans)

Wednesday, July 11th, 2007

Dan Froomkin isn’t surprised that “confronted with a tide of anti-war sentiment and a growing number of defecting Republican lawmakers, the White House is changing not its policy on Iraq, but its message.”  Froomkin pithily sums it all up:

Enter the new White House talking point: You want out? We want out, too!

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Message: I Share … Your Goals. (Bush to the Revolting Republicans)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Bush’s party has grown rather sick
Of the war in Iraq spawned by Dick,
Cause Election ’08
Looms and threatens their fate,
And Rove platitudes won’t end it quick.

(You can find more of my antiwar humor here.) [tags]Bush War, Iraq War, Antiwar Sentiment, Revolting Republicans, Election 08, Defecting GOP Lawmakers[/tags]

Happy 5th Blogiversary Skippy

Tuesday, July 10th, 2007

Wow!  My good pal skippy is celebrating his fifth blogiversary today.  Time flies when you’re being tortured by the worst president in U.S. history! Happy blogiversary to one of my favorite bloggers! I’m so fond of skippy, I once wrote a limerick in his honor.[tags]skippy, Blogging News, Blogiversary, Blogger Anniversary[/tags]

Ode To Jim Capozzola – Limerick (Updated)

Tuesday, July 3rd, 2007

I’ve already written a post about Jim Capozzola’s tragic death, but I felt the need to do more.  So I’ve written a limerick in his honor:

Ode To James Capozzola (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Let us all sing a lefty blog hymn
On the death of our Rittenhouse-Jim.
He had insight and wit.
Capozzola had “it
With a mast’ry of wisdom and whim.

UPDATE: It’s no surprise that the lefty blogosphere is packed with tributes to Jim Capozzola. Here are just some of them:

* Skippy
* Avedon Carol
* Julia of Sisyphus Shrugged
* Elayne Riggs
* Susie Madrak
* Leah at Correntewire
* TalkLeft
* Noz
* Pharyngula
* MaxSpeak
* PatriotBoy
* Demosthenes
* Scott
* Digby
* Ginger
* Roger Ailes
* Ezra
* Signorile
* Richard
* Albert
* Philly Future
* TBogg
* Wampum
* Kevin Hayden
* The Talking Dog
* Sir Oolius
* Mithras
* Matt Yglesias
* Brendan
* Duncan
* The Crone
* Blinq
* Maru
* Tattered Coat
* More Tributes Via Memeorandum [tags]Jim Capozzola, James Capozzola, Rittenhouse Review, Left Blogosphere Mourns Death, Jim Capozzola Limerick[/tags]

Lawless President Pays Off Law-Breaker Libby (News Haiku)

Tuesday, July 3rd, 2007

I can almost hear that promise Bush and Cheney surely made to Scooter Libby way back when:

Tell no tales,
And you won’t go to jail.

Scooter came through with flying (and lying) colors and has now gotten his unjust deserts:

Bush obstructs justice,
Rewarding Scooter’s silence:
Prison-free pay-off.

(You can find more legal and lawyer humor and satire here and more news and political haiku here.) [tags]Scooter Libby, Lewis “Scooter” Libby, Commutation, Commuted Sentence, Bush Obstructs Justice, President Bush, VP Cheney, Cover Up, Valerie Plame[/tags]

Progressive Blogosphere Loses Another Great: James Capozzola (1962-2007)

Tuesday, July 3rd, 2007

I can’t begin to tell you how saddened I am by Jim Capozzola’s death. While I only met him once, I considered him a friend, and I’d like to think he felt the same way about me. We emailed each other many times over the years, often talking about getting together again. Alas, we never did manage another meet-up.

Jim’s Rittenhouse Review was one of the first liberal blogs and one of the best.  His writing sparkled with insight and wit and was always a joy to read. I join the countless bloggers, readers, friends, and fans who mourn his loss.

UPDATE: I felt the need to do something more, so I’ve written a limerick Ode To Jim Capozzola. [tags]James Capozzola, Jim Capozzola, Death In Liberal Blogosphere [/tags]