Archive for the ‘White House’ Category

Inconvenient Facts (Limerick)

Wednesday, November 19th, 2014

Inconvenient Facts (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Republicans love to get traction
By using executive action
As a pretext to jaw:
“Barack breaks the law!”–
Despite similar acts by their faction.

Immigration reform, for example:
Though Bush Senior and Reagan did ample
Such executive acts
It would seem, despite facts,
That on laws only Democrats trample.

Here’s a must-read, if you really want to understand the debate over deportations.

Purloined Limerick

Thursday, October 2nd, 2014

Please don’t rat me out. But while the Secret Service wasn’t looking, I swiped this limerick from President Obama’s desk:

Dear Republicans, thank you for caring.
I’m touched by the worries you’re airing.
Then again, you’ll concede
That my death might impede
Your aspersions on me, now unsparing.

Sleazy To The Core (Limerick)

Wednesday, August 27th, 2014

Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal, formerly a Common Core enthusiast, now claims that the U.S. Education Department’s initiative is an Obama “power-grab.” He’s even suing the federal government, in an appeal to wingnutty Tenthers.

Ka-ching!

Sleazy To The Core (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Bobby Jindal has filed a fed suit
To get Common Core given the boot:
Obama, claims Bob,
Did a power-grab job:
A prez wannabe, raising some loot.

Golf Wars (Limerick)

Friday, August 22nd, 2014

As a devout liberal, I’ve been pretty disappointed in Obama’s presidency. But the constant complaints about his letting off steam via golf are absurd.

To those who claim Obama’s too indifferent to public opinion, think about this: When no matter what you do you’re under constant (often nonsensical) attack, you might as well do what you want.

And don’t even get me started on the fact that most of the horror we’re embroiled in right now is a direct (or indirect) result of the war of choice in Iraq that George W. Bush (Mr. Vacation himself) lied us into.

Golf Wars (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When Obama goes golfing, the press
And the pols say the world’s in a mess,
So the prez should not play.
But they’ll bitch come what may.
So he might as well drive off some stress.

Limerick Ode To “Awesome” Rick Perry

Wednesday, August 13th, 2014

Although Texas Governor Rick Perry hasn’t announced yet, it’s pretty clear that he’s planning to run for the GOP presidential nomination. Now I don’t know about you, but I’m looking forward to some more juicy “oops” moments.

Amusing bits like this will probably be the least of it:

Perry seemed pumped up after his enthusiastic, heckle-free reception at the Register’s Soapbox. When the Register’s moderator thanked him as he came off the stage, Perry said: “You’re welcome. I’m awesome!”

Limerick Ode To “Awesome” Rick Perry
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“You’re welcome. I’m awesome!” said Perry.
Oops, was Perry pumped up? I’d say, “Very!”
Seems another prez run
By that man will be fun.
No debate, Rick will help us make merry.

John Boehner’s Open Limerick To Obama

Friday, August 1st, 2014

John Boehner’s Open Limerick To Obama
By Madeleine Begun Kane

How dare you slow implementation
Of a law that is bad for our nation!
You’re impeding our rush
For a law that we’d flush.
Now show leadership! Fix immigration!

Impeachment “Scam” (Limerick)

Wednesday, July 30th, 2014

Impeachment “Scam” (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

John Boehner appears to be riled.
Dem impeachment talk’s driving him wild:
How dare Dems boost their brand
When impeachment ain’t planned
For that Oval defiler, reviled!

***

Yesterday, John Boehner called the impeachment notion a “scam” invented by Democrats to excite their base and raise money.

No doubt that will remain Boehner’s claim … right up to the moment the House starts the process to impeach.

Double Dactyl For Chris Christie

Thursday, July 17th, 2014

Have you noticed the new wave of stories about Chris Christie’s upcoming Iowa visit? This renewed coverage of Christie’s presidential aspirations gives me an excuse to post this non-limerick of mine, which I entered in the Style Invitational’s recent double dactyl contest:

Bridgery Fridgery,
Governor Christie is
Stuck in a scandal and
Can’t bridge the gap.

Oval-aimed dieting,
Indefatigably,
Hoping to run as a
Skinnier chap.

If you’re not familiar with the double dactyl, I summarize their rules here.

And, by the way, I lost. You can find the winners’ list here.

Warren, We Hardly Knew You (Limerick)

Wednesday, July 9th, 2014

Warren, We Hardly Knew You (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

It seems Harding had sex on the brain.
His “Jerry” was active, it’s plain.
For his letters, risqué,
Show the singular way
That he scored in his short White House reign.

“Bush’s Brain” Does It Again (2-Verse Limerick)

Wednesday, May 14th, 2014

Karl Rove a/k/a “Turd Blossom” a/k/a “Bush’s Brain” is at it again. And this time his target is Hillary Clinton. First he strongly implies that she had “traumatic brain injury,” while greatly exaggerating the length of her hospital stay:

“Thirty days in the hospital?” Rove said, according to the report. “And when she reappears, she’s wearing glasses that are only for people who have traumatic brain injury? We need to know what’s up with that.”

Next he denies using the specific phrase “brain damage,” as if that makes everything copacetic.

Of course this sort of dirty tricks attack is SOP for Karl Rove.

“Bush’s Brain” Does It Again (2-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Rove’s method is slur and then flee.
His hit jobs leave drive-by debris.
He’ll strongly imply
Something’s true, then deny
That he used a set phrase he deems key.

Rove’s now on an anti-Hill spree,
Lodging brain-health aspersions with glee.
He’ll imply Hill’ry’s brain
Has been damaged, then feign
Complete innocence: Smear her? Not ME!

Infantile Pundits Give Birth To More Wind (Limerick)

Monday, April 21st, 2014

I just love Jeff Greenfield’s take on the “Baby Clinton Madness.” I’m referring, of course, to all the nonsensical opinionating about its effect (or non-effect) on Hillary Clinton’s presumed presidential candidacy.

Infantile Pundits Give Birth To More Wind (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

OMG! Chelsea Clinton’s with child!
Watch political gas-bags go wild,
As they mindlessly mine
Its effects and opine.
Yes, those pundits are rightly reviled.

Limerick Flashback

Wednesday, March 26th, 2014

Limerick Flashback
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The date to apply by is near.
Health care bennies soon lost, many fear.
So the Prez moves the date,
Which makes no one irate;
It was Bush, and ’06 was the year.

Barack & Zach (Limerick)

Wednesday, March 12th, 2014

Bill O’Reilly is outraged, once again, at Barack Obama. What is it this time? The president had the audacity to go where the twenty-somethings are, in order to plug the Affordable Care Act and HealthCare.gov; he gamely appeared on Funny Or Die’s “Between Two Ferns,” for an interview with Zach Galifianakis.

Barack & Zach
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Obama’s appearance with Zach
Has inspired O’Reilly’s attack:
A strong prez would not go
On a comedy show
To plug HealthCare.gov and just yak.

It seems Bill is a psychic. Oh my!
He’s an all-knowing, soothsaying guy,
Who swears Lincoln would never
Have gone on (not ever!!!)
A show done by Funny Or Die.

Ode To Wingnuttery

Tuesday, March 11th, 2014

Ode To Wingnuttery
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Obama is a “tyrant,”
wingnuts tell us ev’ry day.
But they also claim his “cowardice”
makes Putin go astray.

Seems Obama’s “too aggressive,
seizing power with his pen,”
when he isn’t just a “weakling.”
You bewildered yet? Amen!

Bracing For The SOTU (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 28th, 2014

Bracing For The SOTU (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Tonight we’ll be glued to our set,
Even though it’s a very safe bet
That, as always, the SOTU
Will drive us to go to
Strong drink. (We’ve no hash cigarette.)

SOTU Antics (Limerick)

Monday, January 27th, 2014

SOTU Antics (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Watch the SOTU’s bipartisan fight,
As the Prez walks the aisle Tuesday night.
Pols will lunge for his hand
Or a cheek, so they’ll land
On TV in this annual rite.

*****

And speaking of the State of the Union Address, remember the good old days when there was one yearly State of the Union speech and a single response from the opposition party?

Then, suddenly, the Republicans added a second rebuttal (referred to as the Tea Party response.) This was done in accordance with the “Oh my God! There’s a black president!” rule.

Well this year, two Republican responses have been deemed insufficient. (The “Why hasn’t he been impeached yet?” rule.)

So this Tuesday night we’ll be treated to three Republican rebuttals from Cathy McMorris Rodgers, Mike Lee, and Rand Paul, respectively.

What’s the matter? No room for Chris Christie?

Maybe next year, if he hangs on to his gig in New Jersey.

Exchangeable Views (Limerick)

Thursday, October 24th, 2013

Exchangeable Views (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The Republican stance is still no:
“Obamacare’s bad and must go.”
So explain why they bitch
That something they’d ditch
Does things they don’t want way too slow.

Clean Messaging (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 8th, 2013

In President Obama’s October 8 news conference about the current budget and debt ceiling stalemate with Republicans, Obama said: “We can’t make extortion routine as part of our democracy.”

Clean Messaging (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

We can’t make extortion routine,
Said Obama, and that’s why a clean
Bill for spending and debt
Is a requisite get,
Else democracy’s sure to careen.

“Party First” Politics (3-Verse Limerick)

Wednesday, September 25th, 2013

“Party First” Politics (3-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When the government runs out of cash
And shuts down, then just who will you bash?
If you’re paying attention,
The party you’ll mention
Is Republican — that’s who you’ll trash.

But misinformation’s widespread
Cuz the public is constantly fed
Big Republican lies
Which attempt to disguise
Who would chop off the government’s head.

Yet the GOP’s mission is clear:
It’s a goal they’ve chased year after year
To stymie Obama,
No matter the trauma
To all that our nation holds dear.

War Weary Limerick

Thursday, September 5th, 2013

I do not support U.S. military intervention in Syria — seriously!

War Weary Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Though I’m constantly knocking and mocking
The Republican habit of blocking
The President’s moves,
I think it behooves
Both parties to thwart his war hawking.