Archive for the ‘White House’ Category

Grassley’s Gonna Sit Right Down and Write The Prez a Letter

Tuesday, May 14th, 2019

From the Washington Post, re Trump’s tariffs:

“Senate Finance Committee Chairman Charles E. Grassley (R-Iowa) said he planned to write a letter to Trump to explain the concerns of farmers because he felt the argument he had repeatedly made to the president in person was not registering.”

I apologize to Ahlert and Young for these song parody lyrics:

I’m gonna sit right down and write the Prez a letter
And make believe that Trump can read.
I’m gonna write words, oh, so sweet.
They’re gonna help guys growing wheat.
A lotta kisses on Trump’s bottom.
He’ll be glad he got ’em.

I’m gonna smile and say I hope he’ll end his tariffs.
Then I’ll close with love the way I do.
I’m gonna sit right down and write to help the farmers.
And pray my letter helps me too.

Don Jr. Is Lucky It’s JUST A Subpoena (Limerick)

Sunday, May 12th, 2019

Like Rachel Maddow, I think Don Jr. is lucky it’s JUST a subpoena. (He could have been hit with a perjury indictment referral like other such liars.)

Poor Donald Trump Jr. is mad;
A subpoena’s been served on the lad.
But he’s dodged a referral
For perj’ry — demurral?!?
He should THANK Richard Burr and be glad!

Trump’s Tariff Whopper (Limerick)

Sunday, May 12th, 2019

Donald Trump likes to brag and enthrall,
By claiming his tariffs are all
Paid by China — a LIE
That his base seems to buy…
Just like Mexico’s paid for the wall.

“Case” Not So “Closed” (Limerick)

Thursday, May 9th, 2019

“Members of President Trump’s inner circle are frustrated that the Republican-led Senate Intelligence Committee subpoenaed Donald Trump Jr.,” according to CNN.

It’s over and done, so “case closed,”
Says McConnell, yet Burr has imposed
A subpoena on one
Of Trump’s sons. (NOT so done!)
Here’s hoping Don Jr. is hosed.

I Dislike Likability (Limerick)

Sunday, May 5th, 2019

Headline: “Is ‘Likability’ Biased Towards Men?”

“Likability” — what a odd word;
It appears that most any male turd
Can be deemed by the press
As more likable — yes —
Than a non-turd-like female. Absurd!

Whiner-In-Chief (Limerick)

Sunday, May 5th, 2019

Headline: “Trump: 2 years of my term were ‘stollen’”

The first half of Trump’s term has been “stollen,”
Complains Donald by tweet; he is all-in
On his claim of harassment.
His Twitter amassment
Of gripes shows the guy can’t stop bawlin’.

Trump Testy Over Mueller Testimony (Limerick)

Sunday, May 5th, 2019

Headline: “Trump Objects to Mueller Testifying Before Congress”

Donald Trump is beginning to panic
Over threats to a long reign, tyrannic:
What has roused Donald’s fear?
Mueller’s said he’ll appear
Before Congress. (Cue terror volcanic.)

Our Lawless President (Limerick)

Wednesday, April 24th, 2019

Trump delays and defies and he sues;
His flawed policy’s thwart and refuse.
Tell him “Follow the law,”
And he’ll yell or guffaw.
Don’t believe it? Try reading real news.

Republicans Scan Mueller Report … And Shrug (Limerick)

Tuesday, April 23rd, 2019

Have Republican consciences shrunk
To the point where the GOP’s sunk?
Donald’s Senator/flunkies
Scan Mueller like junkies
Who (strung out on Trump) deem it bunk.

Bracing For Barr’s Mueller Report Whitewash (Limerick)

Monday, April 15th, 2019

Headline: “Mueller Report Coming on Thursday”

Though the “Mueller Report” soon’s a-coming,
Many Sharpies are busily humming
With redactions galore;
A “blackwash” full-bore!
Thanks to Barr, through a sham we’ll be thumbing.

Open Limerick To William Barr

Sunday, April 14th, 2019

Dear Bill Barr, you have gone very far,
And your rep once was well above par.
But like most who have deigned
To join Trump, you’ve been stained;
Tainted, marred by a sycophant’s scar.

Mayor Pete v. Pence (Limerick)

Friday, April 12th, 2019

There’s a Mike Pence/Pete Buttigieg feud
Cuz the Veep is an anti-gay dude,
Who pretends to be pious
To justify bias…
As he praises a Prez, crude and lewd.

Limerick Ode To Roger Stone’s Woes (Two-Verse)

Friday, April 12th, 2019

Headline: “Roger Stone’s woes: He’s broke. Donald Trump doesn’t call. And his wife broke her ankle.”

Poor Roger — he claims that he’s broke.
Are we s’posed to feel bad for that bloke?
He’s been gagged and is under
Indictment; his blunder
Is breaking the law. What a joke!

Roger Stone also whines that he misses
Good pal Donald. (No calls, hugs, or kisses?)
What a horror he paints;
Roger’s full of complaints.
But I find it quite easy to diss his.

Trump’s Fiendish, Foolish, Fullness Ploy (Limerick)

Tuesday, April 9th, 2019

Headline: “Trump Says the U.S. Is ‘Full.’ Much of the Nation Has the Opposite Problem.”

Says the Donald, the U.S. is “full!”
As always, Trump’s trying to pull
A fast one, to stir
Up his base and deter
Immigration — Trump’s typical bull.

Kirstjen Nielsen, Buh-Bye! (Limerick)

Monday, April 8th, 2019

Donald’s infamous Child-Caging Queen
Has been fired by Trump. Some might glean
That the caging is why
She’s been dumped, but (oh, my!)
Seems the Sec’s insufficiently mean.

Trump’s “Complete And Total Exoneration” (Limerick)

Tuesday, April 2nd, 2019

New York Magazine Headline: “Trump Aides Fear He Is Overselling His ‘Exoneration’”

Trump lies, as he brags to our nation
That he’s gotten complete vindication
From the Mueller Report,
While some staffers exhort:
Don’t distort please, in worried frustration.

Open Limerick To Joe Biden

Tuesday, April 2nd, 2019

Dear Joe Biden, I liked you as Veep,
But it’s clear that you simply can’t keep
From invading the space
Of gals. It’s off-base,
And the price of such action’s now steep.

Trump Ruins Another Holiday (Limerick)

Monday, April 1st, 2019

I have failed, despite numerous tries
To concoct some good holiday lies
For April the First.
But with Donald we’re cursed,
And the President’s lies take the prize.

Meaner Than Mean (Limerick)

Thursday, March 28th, 2019

The Donald is meaner than mean.
His venom is base and obscene.
He’s perniciously vicious
And cruelly seditious…
Wreaking havoc while venting his spleen.

Trump v. Healthcare (Limerick)

Thursday, March 28th, 2019

Pre-existing conditions protection
Is, to Donald, an evil infection;
Any “Kenyan’s” creation
Is bad for our nation.
All Obama erected? Ejection!