Posts Tagged ‘Election 2020’

Mask Mandate Madness (Limerick)

Wednesday, September 16th, 2020

Headline: “Biden on Trump’s Attack on Him for Not Introducing Mask Mandate: ‘To Be Clear, I Am Not Currently President’”

“Where’s the national mandate for masks
Biden promised to give us?” Trump asks.
For logic, I mourn,
Cuz I sure could have sworn
That’s among Donald’s President-tasks.

Trump’s Killer Instinct (Limerick)

Tuesday, September 15th, 2020

Headline: “Trump ignores science at dangerous indoor rally”

Donald’s base should start writing their wills,
Cuz he feeds on large audience thrills;
Crammed together indoors,
Scanty masks, chair-filled floors.
Donald Trump doesn’t care whom he kills.

Ante Up! (Limerick)

Tuesday, September 8th, 2020

Ante up, if you’re anti the guy
In the White House. You surely know why:
If we fail to vote out
That liar and lout,
Bid all that is good a goodbye.

Another Promise Unkept (Limerick)

Friday, August 28th, 2020

Trump way back in 2016: “I am the law and order candidate.”

“Law and Order’s” a Trump campaign vow,
But the promise that Trump’s making now
Is a ’16 repeat
That he broke. So unseat
Donald Trump and let Joe take a bow.

Trump-Logic (Limerick)

Friday, August 28th, 2020

Blaming Biden for civil unrest
Falls afoul of ye old straight-face test.
Cuz the last time I checked
Trump was prez, and he’s wrecked
Our great nation. (So much for “Be Best.”)

The Trump Cult (Limerick)

Monday, August 24th, 2020

“In lieu of a party platform, Republicans express ‘strong support’ of Trump.”

The GOP seems to exult
In becoming the Donald Trump Cult.
No platform this year —
Just a Donald Trump cheer;
Lots of toadies, but not one adult!

If Susan B. Anthony Could Write Limericks

Tuesday, August 18th, 2020

“President Donald Trump on Tuesday signed a pardon for women’s suffrage icon Susan B. Anthony, who was arrested in 1872 for casting a ballot when women could not vote.”

Dear Donald, your pardon’s rejected;
I despise pardonees you’ve protected!
Stop pretending to care
About gals, and don’t dare
Use my pardon to get reelected.

Trump’s Executive “Order” Scam (Limerick)

Monday, August 10th, 2020

Washington Post Headline: “Here’s what is actually in Trump’s four executive orders

The details on payroll taxes, unemployment and evictions are not as generous as he made them sound.”

Dear Donald, how sneakily clever!
Will your “orders” help voters? No never!
But your base who’s unschooled
In the law may be fooled
By your “efforts” while pulling that lever.

Rally Folly (Limerick)

Monday, June 22nd, 2020

Dear Donald, you seem to be sad
Cuz that rally in Tulsa was BAD.
Your turnout was poor–
A shanda full-bore–
Just deserts for a self-dealing cad.

Trump Pens Another Limerick

Wednesday, May 6th, 2020

“The Democrats want me to fail,
And they’re rooting for death to prevail.
Since election’s their goal,
They’d applaud a large hole
In our markets … plus vote-fraud by mail.”

Irrational Polls (Limerick)

Friday, March 27th, 2020

Headline: “Trump’s Approval Jumps Five Points”

A rise in the Donald’s approval
Transcends logic; he merits removal!
Such a gain in our national
Polls is irrational…
As peculiar as numbers from Liouville.*

*If you don’t understand my reference to mathematician Joseph Liouville, here’s a helpful link. And no, I’d never heard of him before, either. But when you’re desperate for a rhyme word, sometimes you have to research math.

Crisis-Mishandler-In-Chief (Limerick)

Saturday, March 7th, 2020

Empty bluster, denial, subversion,
Specious happy-talk, falsehood immersion;
Ev’ry Trumpy technique
For a crisis seems weak
When applied to a viral incursion.

AWOL Test Kits? (Limerick)

Friday, March 6th, 2020

Headline: “‘BROKEN’ CORONAVIRUS TESTING PROCESS IN U.S. COULD HAVE ENABLED COVID-19 TO SPREAD ‘SILENTLY’ FOR WEEKS, EXPERTS WARN”

U.S. testing for COVID-19
Is so lacking, the number’s obscene.
Tests promised by Feds
Never come. Virus spreads!
But to Trump, things are great! Peachy keen!

Leave It To Trump To Make A Bad Situation Much Worse (Limerick)

Thursday, March 5th, 2020

Headline: “Trump floats his own coronavirus hunches on ‘Hannity’ The president contradicts public health experts statements on death rate, contagion.”

The Donald’s profusion of lies
Has gone viral, so death could arise
From confusion he sows,
Contradicting the pros.
A worse plan one could never devise.

Applauding Mayor Pete (Limerick)

Sunday, March 1st, 2020

I’m bracing for the angry comments likely to come my way:

Mayor Pete, thanks for ending your race.
Though it isn’t your time, you’re an ace.
By shrinking your lane,
The “Stop Bernie” train
Might succeed — that’s the challenge we face.

Victim-In-Chief (Limerick)

Saturday, February 29th, 2020

Headline: “Trump Identifies the Real Coronavirus Victim: His Presidency”

There’s a virus whose spread causes dread.
It began in a land once called “Red.”
Though its victim counts stun,
To Trump there’s just one:
It is Trump — reelection hopes dead.

One Crime Too Many? (Limerick)

Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Trump’s a knave who has gone way too far.
(So too, has his pal AG Barr.)
An impeachment is nigh.
There’s no choice, and here’s why:
Trump behaves like a tyrant and czar.

What If Trump Refuses To Step Down? (Limerick)

Monday, September 16th, 2019

Headline: “What Happens if Trump Won’t Step Down?”

People fret: “What if Donald Trump loses,
And when told to step down, he refuses?”
No prob! End of term,
Dump that blood-sucking worm
At any Trump golf course he chooses.

Trump Messing With The Wrong Actress (Limerick)

Sunday, September 1st, 2019

The Donald is twitter-obsessing,
And his topic this times’s Debra Messing.
But his story won’t sell;
Used his “called me “Sir” tell.
Trump feels threatened by Debra, I’m guessing.

Trump’s Bitches And Sulks As Poll Numbers Slump (Limerick)

Sunday, August 18th, 2019

Headline: “Trump Blames ‘Racism Witch Hunt’ for Low Poll Numbers”

Donald’s numbers seem stuck in a slump,
And the media caused it, claims Trump:
It’s “a Racism Witch Hunt.”
(His pass-the-blame glitch-hunt —
Self-pitying tweet from his rump.)