Posts Tagged ‘Election 2020’

Irrational Polls (Limerick)

Friday, March 27th, 2020

Headline: “Trump’s Approval Jumps Five Points”

A rise in the Donald’s approval
Transcends logic; he merits removal!
Such a gain in our national
Polls is irrational…
As peculiar as numbers from Liouville.*

*If you don’t understand my reference to mathematician Joseph Liouville, here’s a helpful link. And no, I’d never heard of him before, either. But when you’re desperate for a rhyme word, sometimes you have to research math.

Crisis-Mishandler-In-Chief (Limerick)

Saturday, March 7th, 2020

Empty bluster, denial, subversion,
Specious happy-talk, falsehood immersion;
Ev’ry Trumpy technique
For a crisis seems weak
When applied to a viral incursion.

AWOL Test Kits? (Limerick)

Friday, March 6th, 2020

Headline: “‘BROKEN’ CORONAVIRUS TESTING PROCESS IN U.S. COULD HAVE ENABLED COVID-19 TO SPREAD ‘SILENTLY’ FOR WEEKS, EXPERTS WARN”

U.S. testing for COVID-19
Is so lacking, the number’s obscene.
Tests promised by Feds
Never come. Virus spreads!
But to Trump, things are great! Peachy keen!

Leave It To Trump To Make A Bad Situation Much Worse (Limerick)

Thursday, March 5th, 2020

Headline: “Trump floats his own coronavirus hunches on ‘Hannity’ The president contradicts public health experts statements on death rate, contagion.”

The Donald’s profusion of lies
Has gone viral, so death could arise
From confusion he sows,
Contradicting the pros.
A worse plan one could never devise.

Applauding Mayor Pete (Limerick)

Sunday, March 1st, 2020

I’m bracing for the angry comments likely to come my way:

Mayor Pete, thanks for ending your race.
Though it isn’t your time, you’re an ace.
By shrinking your lane,
The “Stop Bernie” train
Might succeed — that’s the challenge we face.

Victim-In-Chief (Limerick)

Saturday, February 29th, 2020

Headline: “Trump Identifies the Real Coronavirus Victim: His Presidency”

There’s a virus whose spread causes dread.
It began in a land once called “Red.”
Though its victim counts stun,
To Trump there’s just one:
It is Trump — reelection hopes dead.

One Crime Too Many? (Limerick)

Wednesday, September 25th, 2019

Trump’s a knave who has gone way too far.
(So too, has his pal AG Barr.)
An impeachment is nigh.
There’s no choice, and here’s why:
Trump behaves like a tyrant and czar.

What If Trump Refuses To Step Down? (Limerick)

Monday, September 16th, 2019

Headline: “What Happens if Trump Won’t Step Down?”

People fret: “What if Donald Trump loses,
And when told to step down, he refuses?”
No prob! End of term,
Dump that blood-sucking worm
At any Trump golf course he chooses.

Trump Messing With The Wrong Actress (Limerick)

Sunday, September 1st, 2019

The Donald is twitter-obsessing,
And his topic this times’s Debra Messing.
But his story won’t sell;
Used his “called me “Sir” tell.
Trump feels threatened by Debra, I’m guessing.

Trump’s Bitches And Sulks As Poll Numbers Slump (Limerick)

Sunday, August 18th, 2019

Headline: “Trump Blames ‘Racism Witch Hunt’ for Low Poll Numbers”

Donald’s numbers seem stuck in a slump,
And the media caused it, claims Trump:
It’s “a Racism Witch Hunt.”
(His pass-the-blame glitch-hunt —
Self-pitying tweet from his rump.)

A Trumpian 4th (2-Verse Limerick)

Thursday, July 4th, 2019

Donald’s pulling out all of the stops,
Treating tanks and our troops just like props;
Using taxpayer cash,
He’s subverting this bash
To flex his tyrannical chops.

Trump’s despoiling the 4th; he’s hell-bent
On saluting himself; this event
Is to boost reelection.
He fears our rejection.
Let’s make sure that to prison he’s sent.

If Trump Could Write Limericks

Thursday, June 13th, 2019

If Trump could write limericks:

Dear nations, both friendly and not,
I need dirt. Send me all that you’ve got.
You’ll be might’ly rewarded,
If Dems are all thwarted.
Name your price. I am easily bought.

Open Limerick To Joe Biden

Wednesday, June 12th, 2019

I joked, yesterday, that because Biden called Trump an “existential threat,” dictionaries were bracing for the existential threat of site crashes.

But apparently I’m not quite through with the topic. So here’s my limerick:

Dear Joe: Dumping Donald’s essential.
His evil’s widespread — pestilential.
He’s a “threat existential,”
His wrongs, consequential.
But the use of big words? Unprudential!

Press Coverage Matters (Limerick)

Tuesday, June 11th, 2019

New York Times Headline: “Elizabeth Warren Has Lots of Plans. Together, They Would Remake the Economy.”

Some regard Warren’s planning with boredom.
Others cheer her. Some say: “Can’t afford ’em!”
Hill had detailed plans too
But, alas, few folks knew
Cuz the media mostly ignored ’em.

Astray (Limerick)

Saturday, February 23rd, 2019

The Donald has led us astray
In ev’ry conceivable way.
Is there any path out
From under this lout?
Twenty-twenty is TOO far away!

Trump Runs Away From Pence? (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 5th, 2018

Headline: “Trump’s Team Considers Removing Mike Pence from 2020 Ticket”

Will the Donald give Mike Pence the boot?
That’s the re-elect rumor. Each coot
Deserves only the worst.
Yes for vengeance, I thirst,
And I’m hoping this question is moot.