Posts Tagged ‘Assault Weapons’

A Not-So-Modest Proposal (Limerick)

Tuesday, June 17th, 2014

A Not-So-Modest Proposal (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Want to thin out the NRA crowd?
Here’s a concept that’s got me quite wowed:
Pair a gun range and bar,
Cuz those folks won’t get far
When gun-toting drunks are allowed.

(Alas, Combination gun ranges/bars do in fact exist.)

Our Unhealthy Nomination Process (Limerick)

Thursday, March 20th, 2014

Obama’s highly qualified Surgeon General nominee, Vivek Murthy, is in limbo. Why? Because Murthy supports an assault weapons ban and believes guns are a health care issue.

Our Unhealthy Nomination Process (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The move against Murthy ain’t stealth
Cuz gun fans are using their wealth.
Seems his Surgeon Gen. quest
Failed the NRA test:
He thinks guns can be bad for your health.

Clueless In Colorado (Limerick)

Monday, April 1st, 2013

If you’re a Colorado spouse abuser, take heart: Republicans have vowed to protect your right to bear arms against Dem meanies, who mean to take it away.

Clueless In Colorado (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Good news for domestic abusers,
Bad news for their victim-accusers:
Colorado is where
The Republicans swear
To guard gun rights for battering bruisers.

The Right To Bear Arms … And Eat Cheap Pizza (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 20th, 2013

I won’t be visiting Jay Laze’s pizza place any time soon:

A Virginia Beach pizza shop owner is showing his support for firearm rights by giving gun owners a 15 percent discount.

The discount is given to anyone who brings a gun or concealed handgun permit to All Around Pizzas and Deli.

The Right To Bear Arms … And Eat Cheap Pizza (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

This news from Virginia’s alarming,
Although some may consider it charming:
Bring your gun to Jay’s shop.
Watch your pizza price drop.
I do NOT find this fellow disarming.

The NRA Plays Games (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 15th, 2013

After yesterday’s Weapon Wonderland Song Parody, I thought I was done with gun posts for a while. But I guess not:

The NRA Plays Games (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“Violent video games are to blame,”
Claims the NRA, much to its shame.
Then it issues its own,
Meant for kids barely grown.
Yes, hypocrisy’s NRA’s name.

UPDATE: There’s some speculation that the National Rifle Association may not be behind this app. However, thus far, the NRA hasn’t disowned it.

Weapon Wonderland Song Parody

Monday, January 14th, 2013

You can hear me attempt to sing my Weapon Wonderland song parody a cappella here. But since I have a lousy voice, it might be safest to just read my parody lyrics:

Weapon Wonderland Song Parody (to be sung to Winter Wonderland)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Gun sales surge. Are you listenin’?
Ammunition keeps glistenin’.
They’re arming tonight and causing a fright.
U.S. Constitution arms the land.

People die for no reason.
Children shot! ‘Tis the season.
A terrible blight, each night after night.
Gun rights absolutists harm our land.

NRA and cronies claim our homeland
Must allow their arms in every town,
Claiming guns will help us.
We say “No man!
“The murder stats have got to go way down.”

Weapon fans have conspired.
Now our nation is mired.
With lives we have paid.
New laws must be made.
Or soon we’ll have a gun in every hand.

(Linked at DVerse Poets)