Posts Tagged ‘Publicity’

Trumped Up Lawsuit (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 5th, 2013

You don’t have to be a “recovering lawyer” like me to know that such a lawsuit would be frivolous:

During a guest appearance on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno last month, Maher quipped that Trump must be “the spawn of his mother having sex with an orangutan” (Exhibit A: his orange hair). In a riff off of Trump’s own offer to give $5 million to the charity of Barack Obama’s choice if the President released his college paperwork, Maher said he would do the same for Trump if the real estate mogul supplied proof that he is not descended from an ape.

Trump, who apparently was able to prove he wasn’t fathered by an orangutan, has announced on Fox & Friends that he’s suing for the $5 million.

Trumped Up Lawsuit (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man who I’d rather not mention
Is relentlessly seeking attention:
With his Birther schtick stale,
He is desp’rate to nail
Lots of cov’rage through lawsuit dissension.

Limerick Ode To Publicity Whores

Wednesday, October 24th, 2012

I try so hard to ignore publicity whores, like Donald Trump and Ann Coulter. And yet, their obnoxious antics make me look … and limerick.

Oh, why I can’t disregard stuff like this Coulter tweet:

…Coulter sent a Twitter message during the presidential debates Monday saying [she] approved of “(Mitt) Romney’s decision to be kind and gentle to the retard,” referring to Obama.

And while I’m at it, I’d love to tune out Donald Trump’s nonsensical “bombshell:”

Donald Trump said on Wednesday that if President Obama releases his college records and his passport application, the mega-millionaire developer will give a $5 million check to charities of Obama’s choosing.

Limerick Ode To Publicity Whores
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Trump and Coulter, two bores I abhor,
And I promise myself to ignore.
But alas, my resistance
Is down. Their persistence
In boorishness strikes at my core.

Limerick Ode To Donald Birther Trump

Wednesday, March 30th, 2011

Limerick Ode To Donald Birther Trump
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I once met a man, Donald Trump,
In my lawyering days — what a lump!
This was long, long ago —
Way before his big show.
He’s no brighter while out on the stump.

Author’s Note: Yes, I really did encounter Donald Trump decades ago, early in my legal career. And no, I don’t really believe Trump will run for U.S. president. But he’s certainly on the stump … for publicity. And if you want to read about Trump’s increasingly malevolent dive into Birther-politics here’s the latest from Political Wire.

Heinous Heenes?

Monday, October 19th, 2009

Last week I managed to avoid the Balloon Boy media frenzy. Reality show participants with an endangered child on an AWOL helium balloon? Yeah … right. Then again, I don’t spend my time watching kids being rescued from wells either.

In any event, I’m not surprised that Wife Swap participants (and reality TV series pitchers) Richard and Mayumi Heene may be arrested for “concocting a publicity stunt by pretending that their young son [Falcon] had climbed aboard a homemade helium balloon and was hurtling through the skies above Fort Collins, Colo.”

The Heenes’ lawyer David Lane expects the Larimer County Sheriff’s Office to file charges this week, and Denver man Robert Thomas says Richard Heene gave him advance word of a media stunt.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Heinous Heenes?
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Two publicity mongers named Heene
Are accused of a hoax quite obscene:
Claimed their wayward balloon
Held their child. Opportune
For a shot at “reality” green.

Update: I’ve heard the Heenes’ name pronounced three different ways, two of which screw up my rhyme scheme. Since I’m not sure which pronunciation is correct, I guess I’ll leave my limerick up as written.