February 28th, 2013
Michael Kinsley is amused by the Republicans’ conflicting complaints about Democrats. So am I.
Limerick Ode To Republican Whiners
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Since Dems are so often maligned
As wimpy, I’m startled to find
A new GOP gripe:
Dems are meanies, they snipe.
Please Republicans, make up your mind.
Tags: GOP Humor, Michael Kinsley, Republican Humor
Posted in GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 4 Comments »
February 22nd, 2013
John Boehner’s 2011 PowerPoint presentation provides ample proof that sequestration originated with the Republicans.
But even if we didn’t have that smoking gun slide show, the GOP’s attempt to label it “Obama’s sequester” wouldn’t pass the straight-face test. Here’s Andrew Sullivan making that powerful point:
…I simply cannot see how a political party that has branded itself in favor of drastic spending cuts can somehow win a public debate in which they are now apparently opposing drastic spending cuts, and “blaming” them on Obama. And their branding means that the slow government shutdown we will almost certainly now face will surely stick more to them than to Obama.
Sequestration Blame Game (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
What’s the key to the GOP brand?
Budget cuts that our land can’t withstand.
So it’s laughably lame
That they’re trying to claim
The sequester’s Obama’s scheme grand.
Tags: Andrew Sullivan, Barack Obama, Blame Game, Budget Cuts, Defense Spending, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Obama's Sequester, Republican Rebranding, Republicans Humor, Sequestration
Posted in Barack Obama, Blame Game, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 2 Comments »
February 20th, 2013
I won’t be visiting Jay Laze’s pizza place any time soon:
A Virginia Beach pizza shop owner is showing his support for firearm rights by giving gun owners a 15 percent discount.
The discount is given to anyone who brings a gun or concealed handgun permit to All Around Pizzas and Deli.
The Right To Bear Arms … And Eat Cheap Pizza (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This news from Virginia’s alarming,
Although some may consider it charming:
Bring your gun to Jay’s shop.
Watch your pizza price drop.
I do NOT find this fellow disarming.
Tags: All Around Pizzas And Deli, Assault Weapons, Firearms, Food Humor, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Laws, Gun Lobby, Gun Violence, Guns, Jay Laze, National Rifle Association, NRA, Pizza Discount, Second Amendment, U.S. Constitution, Virginia, Virginia Beach
Posted in Constitution Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Virginia Humor | 6 Comments »
February 19th, 2013
Here’s a Chris Christie quote that may come back to haunt him: “I’m not much different from Andrew Cuomo. I probably agree with him on 98% of the issues.”
Open Limerick To Chris Christie
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Chris, if the Oval’s your goal,
Then you’re digging yourself a deep hole:
You have said that your views
Are like Cuomo’s — bad news!
To your party each Dem is a troll.
Tags: Andrew Cuomo, Campaign Humor, Chris Christie, Election Humor, Larry Bulman, New Jersey, New York, Oval Office, Republicans Humor, White House
Posted in Andrew Cuomo, Campaign Humor, Chris Christie, Election Satire, GOP Humor, New Jersey Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off
February 19th, 2013
Michelle Obama addressed the burning question of her bangs on the Rachael Ray Show:
“This is my midlife crisis, the bangs. I couldn’t get a sports car,” she told Ray about the inspiration for her trendy new look. “They won’t let me bungee jump. So instead, I cut my bangs.”
“Midlife Crisis” FLOTUS-Style (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“How dare you get bangs,” they harangue.
Michelle laughs at the Sturm and the Drang:
Bungee jumping was out.
So’s a sports car, no doubt.
So she changed up her “do” with a bang.
Tags: Bungee Jumping Humor, Fashion Police, FLOTUS Humor, Hair Humor, Media Humor, Michelle Obama, Michelle's Bangs, Midlife Crisis, Rachael Ray, Sexist Humor, Sturm Und Drang, Subtle Sexism
Posted in Appearance Humor, Feminism Humor, General Humor, Media Satire, Michelle Obama, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, White House | 7 Comments »
February 14th, 2013
I’ve been mystified by the general reaction to Sen. Marco Rubio’s delivery of the GOP response to the State of the Union address.
Yes, his desperate lunge for water looked awkward. Nonetheless, his performance just doesn’t deserve the mockery it’s been getting. In fact, Marco Rubio is the one Republican who worries me.
I find Rubio alarmingly likeable. And I was struck by his ability to lie so convincingly and charmingly.
But I was starting to doubt my own instincts when I came across these comments from Van Jones in response to questioning from CNN anchor Carol Costello:
“Rubio is dangerous for Democrats,” Jones said. “I’m so glad we’re talking about him and we’re joking about him because right when he reached for that water bottle, he was reaching an emotional part of the speech which he stepped on.”
Jones said the while Florida’s junior senator “has an extreme record,” Rubio’s political skill shone through in the last 90 seconds of his speech, which Jones said was “extremely powerful.”
“(Rubio) is to the heart what Paul Ryan is to the head,” Jones said. “This man can connect emotionally.”
Marco’s Dangerous, Mark My Words (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Although Rubio’s drinking looked gawky,
I’m begging you Dems, don’t get cocky:
He lies better than Ryan
And charm’s underlyin’
His falsehoods. So things could get rocky.
Tags: Carol Costello, CNN, Florida, Marco Rubio, Paul Ryan, Political Speech, Political Verse, Republican Response, SOTU, State Of The Union Address, Van Jones
Posted in GOP Humor, Marco Rubio, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 3 Comments »
February 13th, 2013
I generally liked Obama’s SOTU speech. But his voting rights commission plan is unadulterated crapola. How do you give the illusion of dealing with a problem, while doing nothing at all? Appoint a commission.
Obama’s decision to create a voter suppression commission would be bad enough. But he added insult to injury by naming Mitt Romney campaign lawyer Ben Ginsberg to his two-person panel. The very same Ben Ginsberg who helped lead the 2000 recount effort for George W. Bush — an attorney who considers voter suppression a feature, not a bug.
Another Commission? “Ben” There, Done That (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Since voter suppression’s the mission
Of Republicans, voter attrition
Will keep getting worse.
A commission’s a curse.
We need action with great expedition.
Tags: 2000 Recount, Barack Obama, Ben Ginsberg, Commissions Satire, George W. Bush, Mitt Romney, Republicans Limerick, SOTU, State Of The Union Address, Voter Suppression, Voting Limerick
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Speeches Satire, Voting Satire | 3 Comments »
February 11th, 2013
As Obama’s State of the Union address draws nearer, the press (thanks to GOP prodding) has become obsessed with one question: Why the focus on a liberal agenda, instead of jobs and the economy?
Open Limerick To The Media
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Where’s your focus on jobs?” asks the press,
As Obama contends with a mess
Of issues galore,
Cuz his job at its core
Is to many dilemmas address.
So dear media, try this new task:
Press Republicans: Tough questions ask!
Like “Just what have THEY done
About jobs. Name just one
Thing they do besides block, bitch, and bask.”
Tags: Congress Humor, Economy Satire, Employment Humor, GOP Humor, Jobs Jobs Jobs, Liberal Agenda, Media Humor, Obstructionism, President Obama, Press, Republicans Humor, SOTU, State Of The Union Address
Posted in 44 Humor, Congress Humor, Economy Humor, GOP Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Legislation Humor, Media Satire, Money & Finance Humor, Money And Finance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor, White House | 2 Comments »
February 8th, 2013
Here’s a headline I could have done without: “Bill would define abortion as murder.”
State Rep. Rob Bacon believes abortion is murder and he wants the Iowa Code to reflect that.
Bacon, R-Slater, and eight other Republicans introduced such a bill in the Iowa House Wednesday. It would alter the definition of a person in murder cases to “an individual human being, without regard to age of development, from the moment of conception, when a zygote is formed, until natural death.”
Those charged with murder, under the bill, would include a mother who takes abortion-inducing drugs or a doctor who performs an abortion. It also grants no exceptions for rape, incest or to protect the life of the mother.
Bacon’s Crusade Ain’t Kosher (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
If an Iowa Rep has his way
Women’s rights will yet further decay.
Zygote-rights will be greater
Than gals’, as pols cater
To nuts. Will he fail? Let us pray.
Tags: Abortion Rights, Fanatics Humor, Feminist Limerick, Iowa, Murder Definition, Rob Bacon, Zygote-Rights
Posted in Abortion Rights, Filibuster Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Wingnuts, Women's Rights | Comments Off
February 6th, 2013
The housecleaning over at Fox News didn’t stop with Sarah Palin: Dick Morris has been cast out, as well.
That’s ONE Dick Gone (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Say goodbye to the Dick Morris snarl.
Dick (like Palin) can no longer gnarl
All his poisonous spews,
Perched at Fox Cable News.
But alas, Fox is still keeping Karl.
Tags: Dick Morris, Fox News, Karl Rove, Media Humor, Political Commentator, Sarah Palin
Posted in Fox News Humor, Karl Rove, Media Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Sarah Palin, Wingnuts | 4 Comments »
February 5th, 2013
You don’t have to be a “recovering lawyer” like me to know that such a lawsuit would be frivolous:
During a guest appearance on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno last month, Maher quipped that Trump must be “the spawn of his mother having sex with an orangutan” (Exhibit A: his orange hair). In a riff off of Trump’s own offer to give $5 million to the charity of Barack Obama’s choice if the President released his college paperwork, Maher said he would do the same for Trump if the real estate mogul supplied proof that he is not descended from an ape.
Trump, who apparently was able to prove he wasn’t fathered by an orangutan, has announced on Fox & Friends that he’s suing for the $5 million.
Trumped Up Lawsuit (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man who I’d rather not mention
Is relentlessly seeking attention:
With his Birther schtick stale,
He is desp’rate to nail
Lots of cov’rage through lawsuit dissension.
Tags: Ape Humor, Bill Maher, Donald Trump, Fox News, Jay Leno, Law Satire, Lawsuits, Legal Humor, Litigation Humor, Media Humor, Orangutan Humor, Publicity, Tonight Show
Posted in Birther Humor, Donald Trump, Fox News Humor, Legal Limericks, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Publicity Hounds | 3 Comments »
February 4th, 2013
I’m enjoying the conflicting rumors about Tagg Romney perhaps running for John Kerry’s old Senate Seat.
Limerick Ode To Tagg Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A scion of Romney, named Tagg,
Voiced a punchy, but fantasy brag
About “taking a swing”
At our prez, so his fling
At the Senate may well hit a snag.
Tags: Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, John Kerry, Massachusetts, Mitt Romney, Tagg Romney, U.S. Senate
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 5 Comments »
February 3rd, 2013
Texas Governor Rick Perry, whose reputation hasn’t recovered from his presidential campaign debacle, is trying to bolster his right-wing cred with an attack on gays. Perry, an Eagle Scout, “said emphatically Saturday that the Boy Scouts of America should not soften its strict policy barring gay members, and dismissed the idea of bending the organization to the whims of ‘popular culture.’”
Eagle Scout Perry’s Bald Wingnut Pander (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A new policy may be conferred
By the Boy Scouts. At least, that’s the word.
But Eagle Scout Rick
Thinks this change would be sick:
He’d keep flipping gay Boy Scouts the bird.
Tags: Anti-Gay Politicians, Boy Scouts, Eagle Scouts, Gay Rights, Political Verse, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Texas Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Gay Rights, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Texas Humor | Comments Off
February 1st, 2013
Rest In Peace, Edward Koch. ( December 12, 1924 – February 1, 2013)
Limerick Ode To Ed Koch
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Ed Koch sure was one of a kind:
Got my city right out of its bind.
“How’m I doing?” he’d ask.
Praise would flow, and he’d bask.
We shall miss his New York state of mind.
Tags: Celebrity Limerick, Edward Koch, Mayor Ed Koch, New York City, Obit
Posted in Celebrity Verse, New York Mayors, New York Politics, Obit Limericks, Political Limericks, Political Verse | 4 Comments »
January 28th, 2013
Here’s a headline I sure didn’t want to read: Veteran Iowa Sen. Tom Harkin to retire after the 2014 elections.
Harkin, a staunch liberal who advocated for serious filibuster reform, announced his retirement very shortly after Sen. Harry Reid caved and made a pathetically week filibuster “reform” deal with Sen. Mitch McConnell.
While I’m no mind reader, I’m betting the two are connected.
Limerick Ode To Tom Harkin
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Tom Harkin is stepping aside.
His loss will be hard to abide.
I blame Reid, cuz he blew
His big chance for some true
Filibuster reform, which has died!
Tags: Filibuster Humor, Harry Reid, Mitch McConnell, Tom Harkin, U.S. Senate
Posted in Filibuster Humor, Harry Reid, Mitch McConnell, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Senate Satire | 3 Comments »
January 22nd, 2013
Republican pols, most notably John McCain, didn’t find Obama’s second inaugural address sufficiently conciliatory. Here’s McCain:
“There was very little reaching out to the other side,” he said. “It was a fine speech, but I didn’t hear any conciliatory remarks. I didn’t see any specific reference like, ‘I reach out my hand to the other side of the aisle.’ “
Limerick Ode To McCain, The Conciliator
By Madeleine Begun Kane
As Obama’s Inaugural wraps,
John McCain now complains of a lapse:
Just where in the speech
Does the President reach
Cross the aisle to invite some more slaps?
Tags: Barack Obama, Inaugural Address, Inauguration, John McCain, Political Speech
Posted in Barack Obama, Election Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 5 Comments »
January 15th, 2013
After yesterday’s Weapon Wonderland Song Parody, I thought I was done with gun posts for a while. But I guess not:
The NRA Plays Games (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Violent video games are to blame,”
Claims the NRA, much to its shame.
Then it issues its own,
Meant for kids barely grown.
Yes, hypocrisy’s NRA’s name.
UPDATE: There’s some speculation that the National Rifle Association may not be behind this app. However, thus far, the NRA hasn’t disowned it.
Tags: Assault Weapons, Gun Control, Gun Laws, Gun Lobby, Gun Violence, Guns, Hypocrisy, National Rifle Association, NRA, NRA App, Practice Range Game, Second Amendment, Song Parodies, U.S. Constitution, Violent Video Games
Posted in Constitution Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire | 2 Comments »
January 14th, 2013
You can hear me attempt to sing my Weapon Wonderland song parody a cappella here. But since I have a lousy voice, it might be safest to just read my parody lyrics:
Weapon Wonderland Song Parody (to be sung to Winter Wonderland)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gun sales surge. Are you listenin’?
Ammunition keeps glistenin’.
They’re arming tonight and causing a fright.
U.S. Constitution arms the land.
People die for no reason.
Children shot! ‘Tis the season.
A terrible blight, each night after night.
Gun rights absolutists harm our land.
NRA and cronies claim our homeland
Must allow their arms in every town,
Claiming guns will help us.
We say “No man!
“The murder stats have got to go way down.”
Weapon fans have conspired.
Now our nation is mired.
With lives we have paid.
New laws must be made.
Or soon we’ll have a gun in every hand.
(Linked at DVerse Poets)
Tags: Assault Weapons, Gun Control, Gun Laws, Gun Lobby, Gun Violence, Guns, National Rifle Association, NRA, Second Amendment, Song Parodies, U.S. Constitution
Posted in Constitution Humor, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 17 Comments »
January 10th, 2013
I have nothing against white guys. (Some of my best husbands are white guys.) But President Obama’s second term appointments are really starting to annoy me.
White House Diversity’s Owed (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Where’s Obama’s diversity minder–
His “qualified female” staff finder?
He’s named white guys galore
To positions top-drawer.
Perhaps he should borrow Mitt’s binder.
Tags: Barack Obama, Binders, Binders Full Of Women, Diversity Satire, Employment, Feminism Humor, Feminist Limerick, Gender Humor, Gender Inequality, Mitt Romney, Qualified Females, Sexism, White House, Workplace
Posted in 44 Humor, Barack Obama, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Social Satire, White House | 2 Comments »
January 8th, 2013
I can’t help admiring the audacity and creativity of this fellow’s Citizens United-inspired legal argument:
A driver in San Rafael, California is attempting to appeal a traffic citation for driving alone in a High Occupancy Vehicle lane. Jonathan Frieman and his attorney, Ford Greene, argue that since Frieman had corporate incorporation papers in his car when he was stopped by an officer, he was actually carpooling at the time…
He’s sworn to chase the case all the way to the Supreme Court should the first trial not go his way in an attempt to “expose the impracticality of corporate personhood.”
A Driving Attack On Corporate Personhood (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m not driving alone, said the guy
In the HOV lane, and here’s why:
Corp’rate personhood rules,
And my corp files, you fools,
Are right here. My defense — you must buy!
Tags: Automobiles, California, Carpooling Humor, Cars, Citizens United, Corporate Personhood, Drivers, Ford Greene, High Occupancy Vehicle Lanes, HOV Lanes, Incorporation Papers, Jonathan Frieman, Law Humor, Legal Humor, San Rafael
Posted in Automobiles Satire, California Satire, Constitution Humor, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Limericks, Supreme Court | 2 Comments »
That’s ONE Dick Gone (Limerick)
February 6th, 2013The housecleaning over at Fox News didn’t stop with Sarah Palin: Dick Morris has been cast out, as well.
That’s ONE Dick Gone (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Say goodbye to the Dick Morris snarl.
Dick (like Palin) can no longer gnarl
All his poisonous spews,
Perched at Fox Cable News.
But alas, Fox is still keeping Karl.
Tags: Dick Morris, Fox News, Karl Rove, Media Humor, Political Commentator, Sarah Palin
Posted in Fox News Humor, Karl Rove, Media Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Sarah Palin, Wingnuts | 4 Comments »