Archive for the ‘Family & Relatives Humor’ Category
Saturday, August 6th, 2022
“I’ve been faithful! You’ve NOT been deceived,”
Said a gal to her spouse. “I’m aggrieved
And can’t handle your doubts,
Accusations, and shouts!”
“Don’t worry! I’ll soon be bereaved.”
Tags: Argument Humor, Argument Limerick, Argument Verse, Battle of the Sexes, Husband and Wife Humor, Marital Relationships, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Relationship Humor
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Relationship Humor | Comments Off on The Not So Happy Couple (Limerick)
Monday, July 11th, 2022
Wherever I go (or I’ve been)
Bugs attack me, ignoring my kin.
I scratch and I itch
And I can’t help but bitch…
Cuz mosquitoes get under my skin!
Update: August 20 is World Mosquito Day.
Tags: August Holidays, Bug Humor, Bug Limerick, Bugs, Husband and Wife Humor, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limericks, Insect and Bug Humor, Insect Bites, Insect Humor, Insect Limerick, Insects, Mosquito Humor, Mosquitoes, Odd Holidays, Outdoors, Summer Gripes, Summer Humor, World Mosquito Day
Posted in Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Insect Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays, Outdoors Humor, Relationship Humor, Seasons Humor, Weather Humor | Comments Off on Still Bugged By Mosquitoes (Limerick)
Wednesday, June 22nd, 2022
A young fellow sensed something amiss
With wife Fran from her lackluster kiss;
She had downed sev’ral beers,
Then compounded his fears:
“I’m not Fran, but her evil twin sis.”
(“National Kissing Day” falls each year on June 22.)
Tags: June Holidays, Kiss Humor, Kiss Limerick, Kissing Day, Kissing Humor, Kissing Limerick, National Kissing Day, Odd Holidays, Twins, Twins Humor, Twins Limerick
Posted in Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays, Relationship Humor | Comments Off on The Off-Kilter Kiss (Limerick)
Thursday, June 9th, 2022
“My niece Mary’s a likeable lass
Who, alas, is engaged to an ass.
Though I’ve warned her, ‘Be wary,’
She’s anxious to marry.
What I need is a ‘Hail Mary pass.'”
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Engagement Humor, Engagement Limerick, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Limerick, Hail Mary Pass, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Relationship Humor
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Dating Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor | 2 Comments »
Saturday, May 28th, 2022
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SHOW at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TRICKS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TRICKS-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
FAIL LOUD POP LAWYER SACK
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on June 26, 2022, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you four full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, June 25, 2022 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SHOW-rhyme limerick:
Though my recall is poor, I don’t mind,
Cuz forgetting can sometimes be kind:
It might “freshen” a show,
Whose plot I should know
From a book that my mem’ry can’t find.
And here’s my TRICKS-themed limerick:
A magician was stressed out and sick.
He needed a remedy — quick:
“I can’t cancel my show!
It’s sold out — ev’ry row.”
A massage and Bordeaux did the trick.
And here is my RANDOM WORDS GENERATOR Limerick:
A lawyer’s been working non-stop
To defend an old fellow — a cop.
But alas, he has failed,
And the cop is now jailed.
Worst of all, that old cop is his pop.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Anxiety and Stress, Books Humor, Books Limerick, Competition Limerick, Lawyer Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Magic Humor, Magic Limerick, Magician, Memory Humor, Memory Limerick, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Shows Humor, Shows Limerick, Stress Humor, Stress Limerick, Tricks Humor, Tricks Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Books, Contests, Entertainment Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 190 Comments »
Wednesday, April 27th, 2022
The aptly named newlywed, Dick,
Refers to his bride as a “chick”
And never extols her.
He boasts he “controls her”
By using “both carat and stick.”
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Relationship Humor, Relationship Limerick
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Family & Relatives Humor, Idiom Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Relationship Humor | Comments Off on A Dickish Limerick
Sunday, April 24th, 2022
He showed off his coat with a swagger:
“It’s a one-of-a-kind,” said the bragger.
Then he brandished a knife:
“I’ll use THIS on the wife!”
His behavior? Sub-par cloak-and-dagger.
Tags: Braggart Verse, Bragging Humor, Bragging Limerick, Cloak And Dagger, Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Coat Humor, Coat Limerick, Idioms Humor, Idioms Limerick, Knife Humor, Knife Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Weapons Humor, Weapons Limerick
Posted in Clothing Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Idiom Humor, Marriage Humor, Weapons Humor | Comments Off on Cloaked In Bravado (Limerick)
Tuesday, April 19th, 2022
Well aware that his rich aunt would savor
Chole Masala — her favorite flavor,
Greedy Greg bought her lunch
At an Indian brunch.
His goal was (of course) curry favor.
Tags: Food Humor, Food Limerick, Greed Humor, Greed Limerick, Indian Food, Relatives Humor, Wills Humor, Wills Limerick
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks | Comments Off on Dishy Verse (Limerick)
Thursday, April 7th, 2022
A young gal grabbed her daughter to scold ’er:
“You should know better, now that you’re older.
Throwing snack food is rude,
Also wasteful and crude,”
Said the mom with a chip on her shoulder.
Tags: Badly Behaved Children, Child Humor, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Parenting Humor, Parenting Limerick, Snack Food Humor
Posted in Children Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Parenting Humor | Comments Off on Snack Food Grievance (Limerick)
Monday, November 1st, 2021
Ev’ry day when I rise, hubby greets me
With political news, which depletes me.
He’s eager to share it,
But I just can’t bear it,
Cuz pre-caffeine info defeats me.
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Caffeine Humor, Caffeine Limerick, Coffee Drinks Humor, Coffee Humor, Coffee Limerick, Food and Drink, Husband Wife Humor, Marriage Humor, Media Humor, Media Limerick, News Humor, News Limerick, Personal Humor, Political Humor, Timing Humor, Timing Limerick
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Media Humor, Personal, Political Satire, Relationship Humor, Social Media Humor | Comments Off on When I Rise, I Don’t Shine (Limerick)
Saturday, September 25th, 2021
“It’s easy to hoodwink that stinker,”
Said a man of his wife, a big drinker.
“When coition’s my mission,
She thinks I’m out fishin’…
And falls for it hook, line, and sinker.”
Tags: Battle of Sexes, Bawdy Humor, Bawdy Limerick, Dishonesty, Fish Humor, Fish Limerick, Fishing Humor, Fishing Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Wordplay Humor
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Family & Relatives Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Marriage Humor, Wordplay | Comments Off on Fishing For An Alibi (Limerick)
Saturday, September 12th, 2020
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SEAT or DECEIT or RECEIPT or CONCEIT at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to ADVICE, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best ADVICE-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on Sept. 27, 2020, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, Sept. 26, 2020 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SEAT/DECEIT/RECEIPT/CONCEIT-rhyme limerick:
“My husband in court must be beat.
Cuz I’m sickened by all his deceit.
He lies just for sport
And in bed he falls short…
So he needs to go down in defeat.”
And here’s my ADVICE-themed limerick:
“Loosen up. Time to let down your hair.”
“Take a risk, but don’t act on a dare.”
“Grow a pair. Roll the dice.”
Uninvited advice
Makes me wig out and bristle. Beware!
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Advice, Competition Limerick, Court Humor, Deceit, Divorce Limerick, Law Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Lying, Marriage Verse, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Advice Humor & Poems, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Family & Relatives Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 147 Comments »
Wednesday, April 8th, 2020
Hubby’s hair is in need of a trim.
It’s approaching the length of a limb.
But a barber is out
Cuz that virus has clout.
Will he let me wield scissors? Not HIM!
Tags: Barber, Beauty Parlor, Covid-19, Hair Humor, Haircut, Husband Humor, Pandemic, Physical Appearance, Quarantine
Posted in Family & Relatives Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Physical Appearance | 3 Comments »
Saturday, March 10th, 2018
It’s National Genealogy Day. (2nd Saturday of March)
A woman whose quest for her roots
Revealed relatives deep in cahoots
With a killer and bandit,
Has finally canned it
And buried her fam’ly tree fruits.
Tags: Family History, Genealogy Day, Genealogy Humor, Odd Holidays, Relatives
Posted in Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Happy Genealogy Day! (Limerick)
Sunday, March 4th, 2018
It’s risky when parents show flair
In naming their child, so beware!
If you pick a bad name,
You may shoulder the blame
And the cost of a therapist’s stare.
Happy Celebrate Your Name Week (1st full week of March.)
Tags: Celebrate Your Name Week, Children Humor, CYNW, March Holidays, Names Humor, Naming Humor, Odd Holidays, Parents, Psychology Humor, Therapy Humor
Posted in Children Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Parenting Humor | Comments Off on Name-Blame (Limerick)
Saturday, August 27th, 2016
Parents dish out some phrases with glee:
“Just because!” “Cuz I said so!” “We’ll see!”
“Till you pay your own way,
You must do what I say!”
“Do you think money grows on a tree?”
Happy “Just Because Day!” (Aug. 27)
Tags: Child Humor, Children, Just Because Day, Odd Holidays, Parenting Humor, Parents
Posted in Children Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Limericks, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Odd Holidays, Parenting Humor | Comments Off on Pat Parental Retorts (Limerick)
Tuesday, May 24th, 2016
Oh brother! It’s Brothers Day. Wow!
I’ve got me a good one. And how!
With a heart off the chart
Arthur (now known as Art)
Is unrivaled. Please Art, take a bow.
Brothers Day (May 24) is actually meant to celebrate the bond between brothers. But since I missed Brother And Sister Day on March 26, and Siblings Day on April 10, this will have to do.
Tags: April Holidays, Arthur Begun, Brother And Sister Day, Brother Humor, Brothers Day, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, March Holidays, May Holidays, Odd Holidays, Relatives Limerick, Sibling Humor, Siblings Day
Posted in Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Relationship Humor | Comments Off on Happy Brothers Day! (Limerick)
Tuesday, November 25th, 2014
Limerick Ode To Greedy Stores
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Don’t reward greedy, cynical stores
For behaving like gluttonous whores:
If they’re open on days
Like Thanksgiving, it pays
To shop elsewhere. Don’t walk through their doors!
******
A Companion Haiku:
Stores, be on notice:
Open doors on Thanksgiving?
Brace for a boycott.
******
Tags: Family & Relatives Humor, Holiday Humor, Money & Finance Humor, November Holidays, Shopping Humor, Thanksgiving
Posted in Family & Relatives Humor, Holiday Humor, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Shopping Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Greedy Stores
Saturday, August 16th, 2014
Happy National Rum Day! (August 16)
Limerick For National Rum Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal called her husband a lout
And threatened to highball it out
If he kept drinking rum.
He at first was struck dumb,
Then obligingly switched up to stout.
Tags: Alcoholic Poems, August Holidays, Beer, Drinking Limerick, Family & Relatives Humor, Liquor Humor, Marriage Humor, National Rum Day, Odd Holidays, Rum Humor, Stout
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Limerick For National Rum Day
Thursday, May 15th, 2014
May 16th is National Bike to Work Day. Of course, some rides work out better than others:
A Spousal Ride (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Spousal nagging pushed hubby to strike
Some balance by riding a bike.
But when ego and ass
Took a beating, alas,
He told biking and wife, “Take a hike!”
Tags: Bicycle Limerick, Bike Humor, Exercise Humor, Husband Wife Limerick, Marriage Verse, Outdoor Activity Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Exercise Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Outdoors Humor | 1 Comment »
