Posts Tagged ‘Books Humor’

Pining For Spines (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 16th, 2018

This has nothing to do with World Spine Day (Oct. 16,) but it DOES include the word “spine.” That should count for something, right?

When I try to read e-books, I pine
For the texture of paper and spine.
I can see their appeal,
But for me there’s no deal,
And I cherish my library/shrine.

Happy Dewey Decimal Day! (Limerick)

Thursday, December 10th, 2015

When I was a child (way, way, way before computers) I was fascinated by the Dewey Decimal System. How I loved perusing the sliding drawers of those beautiful wooden library cases! They were packed with tiny cards, key to my quest for the number that would lead me to a book’s aisle and shelf location.

So I feel compelled to celebrate Dewey Decimal Day with a limerick. (It’s observed each year on December 10th, in honor of the birthday of Melvil Dewey, inventor of the Dewey Decimal System.)

The U.S. librarian Dewey
Found our library book placement screwy.
“Shelve this system,” he said.
“Number topics instead!”
(So chop suey is near ratatouille.)

Note: Under this topical/numeric system, food books would generally fall into the 641 classification. Cooking and recipes would be 641.5, whereas “cooking specific kinds of composite dishes” would be 641.8.

Life With Mark Kane

Tuesday, April 29th, 2014

(All dialogue guaranteed true)

Mark: “Now that I’ve won, I can go to sleep.” (gazing down, admiringly, at his laptop’s “free cell” screen at 10 pm)

Me: “Remember that Walter Kirn book I mentioned the other day?”

Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” (still looking down)

Me: “The one about the impostor…”

Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” (still looking down)

Me: “I just started reading it.”

Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” (still looking down)

Me: “You’re not listening to me.”

Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.” (still looking down)

Me: “I said you’re not listening to me!”

Mark: “Huh??? Yes, I am.”

Me: “What am I talking about?”

Mark: “Uh…”

Me: “Remember? The Kirn book? I was telling you about it the other day.”

Mark: “Oh yeah.” (surreptitiously typing.)

Me: “You’re looking up “Kirn” in Google aren’t you?”

Mark: “Of course not! I remember you talking about Bruce Kern.”

Me: “I’ve never even heard of Bruce Kern. Stop trying to cheat with Google.”

Mark: “I’m not trying to cheat.”

Me: “Yes you are. I’m talking about WALTER Kirn’s book about the Rockefeller impostor.”

Mark: “Oh, yeah. Jay Rockefeller and the Hamptons.”

Me: “No! “CLARK Rockefeller. Driving a crippled dog from Montana to Manhattan.”

Mark: “Yeah, yeah, yeah.”

Me: “I give up!”

Limerick Ode To Roget’s Thesaurus

Tuesday, April 29th, 2014

Limerick Ode To Roget’s Thesaurus
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Serenade, sing, belt out, croon in chorus:
Happy Birthday to Roget’s Thesaurus,
Sterling word-meister’s brew,
Published Eighteen-Five-Two
In late April. The tome is a Taurus!

(Dr. Peter Mark Roget released his ground-breaking English-language word reference book, Roget’s Thesaurus, to the public on April 29, 1852.)

Escapist Limerick

Thursday, September 20th, 2012

Claudia over at DVersePoets asks us to write a poem about our quiet moments:

Escapist Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When I need to escape and relax,
I read thrillers — fictitious attacks
On a gal or a fellow
I’ll root for while mellow—
Avoiding true life’s ugly facts.

Wedded Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, May 27th, 2012

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow was planning to wed…*

or

A woman was planning to wed…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Wedded Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow was planning to wed
A gal rather awful in bed.
When he gave her a sex book,
Her answer was textbook.
So he married the author instead.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Ode To The Print Encyclopedia

Wednesday, March 14th, 2012

The Encyclopaedia Britannica is the latest victim of the Digital Age:

Encyclopaedia Britannica Inc. announced Tuesday it will stop publishing print editions of its signature product for the first time in its 244-year history. In an acknowledgment of the shifting media landscape and the increasing reliance on digital references, the company said its current encyclopedia – the 32-volume, 129-pound 2010 edition – will be unavailable once the existing stock runs out. (If you’re interested, it’s yours for $1,395 and there are only 4,000 sets left.) The digital version of the encyclopedia, however, will live on.

This news saddened me. And it also reminded me about the obsolete, hand-me-down encyclopedia I grew up with in the Fifties and Sixties:

Limerick Ode To The Encyclopedia
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Brittanicas, World Books and more
Were common in households of yore.
But not in my home—
Just a hand-me-down tome
With entries, I swear, like “World War.”

Ghostly Limerick

Thursday, March 10th, 2011

Ghostly Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

There are those who like being a ghost —
Not the dead kind. Who wants to be toast?
I mean writers whose name
Gets no credit (or blame.)
Here’s my problem with that: You can’t boast.

(More ghost and hauntings verse over at Big Tent Poetry’s Thursday Think Tank)

Tasty Books

Thursday, October 7th, 2010

Tasty Books (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Please don’t tell me you’re “moved” by a book,
Cuz I surely won’t give it a look.
I love thrillers and wit,
But abstain from chick lit
And spurn texts that explain how to cook.