Posts Tagged ‘Web Humor’

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: PRO at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: Sept. 7, 2019)

Sunday, August 25th, 2019

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using PRO at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to INTERNET HAZARDS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best INTERNET HAZARD-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on September 8, 2019, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, September 7, 2019 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my Pro-Rhyme limerick:

You’re unlikely to earn any dough
By becoming a limerick pro.
But you might get applause
And some giggles, guffaws,
And awards, if you give it a go.

And here’s my Internet Hazard-Themed limerick:

Bought a gadget online — what a steal!
Quite expensive, yet still a great deal.
I just wish it would come;
The wait’s making me glum,
And I’m praying the seller is real.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Ode To The Print Encyclopedia

Wednesday, March 14th, 2012

The Encyclopaedia Britannica is the latest victim of the Digital Age:

Encyclopaedia Britannica Inc. announced Tuesday it will stop publishing print editions of its signature product for the first time in its 244-year history. In an acknowledgment of the shifting media landscape and the increasing reliance on digital references, the company said its current encyclopedia – the 32-volume, 129-pound 2010 edition – will be unavailable once the existing stock runs out. (If you’re interested, it’s yours for $1,395 and there are only 4,000 sets left.) The digital version of the encyclopedia, however, will live on.

This news saddened me. And it also reminded me about the obsolete, hand-me-down encyclopedia I grew up with in the Fifties and Sixties:

Limerick Ode To The Encyclopedia
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Brittanicas, World Books and more
Were common in households of yore.
But not in my home—
Just a hand-me-down tome
With entries, I swear, like “World War.”

Haiku Ode to the Greplin Engine

Saturday, March 5th, 2011

I’ve just discovered a new search engine that, believe it or not, does stuff that Google can’t do. It’s the newly launched Greplin, and you can read all about its young founder Daniel Gross here.

So what’s the big deal about Greplin? It indexes and lets you search stuff that’s stored up in the “cloud.” Things like your Facebook posts, Twitter tweets, G-mail, Google Docs, LinkedIn posts, business applications I’m unfamiliar with, etc.

Let’s take its Facebook interface, for instance. Just put a key word or phrase into its search box and up pops a list of your posts (and your friends’ posts) using that word or phrase. I’m finding it so handy, I even wrote this haiku:

Forecast Not Cloudy
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Greplin’s great engine
is searching what Google can’t,
and I’m on cloud nine.

Web Withdrawal Woes

Monday, September 24th, 2007

I dedicate this to everyone’s who’s ever been driven mad by a website or blog outage:

Web Withdrawal Woes (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

This outage has led me to think
I’ve gone bonkers, berserk—need a shrink.
I keep checking the site.
It’s still down—what a plight!
Web withdrawal may drive me to drink.

Ode To The Google PageRank Obsession

Wednesday, July 18th, 2007

Website owners, webmasters, and people who specialize in search engine optimization (SEO) and search engine marketing (SEM) tend to be an obsessive bunch, perpetually checking stats  in their quest for better numbers. What do improved numbers mean?  In theory, they beget better placement in search engine results pages (SERPS), more sales, and higher ad rates.

This obsession tends to reach a frenzied peak roughly four times a year, when Google’s Toolbar is updated, and you learn if your latest PageRank has risen or (heaven forbid) dropped. And while some may claim that they don’t care about PageRank, nobody believes them.

In honor of Google PageRank update season, which apparently is upon us, I’ve written this limerick:

Ode To The Google PageRank Obsession
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Google PageRank obsession is back,
‘Cause an update is due, which we track.
Have our efforts paid off?
Although many will scoff,
We need proof that we’re leading the pack.

(You can find more of my computer and technology humor and limericks here, including my song parody Webmaster’s SEO Complaint.)