Archive for the ‘GOP Humor’ Category
Tuesday, February 11th, 2014
UPDATE: The blogger who interviewed Governor Walker and whose Walker quote is the premise of this entire post and limerick, has corrected his story to indicate that the quote was a transcription error and that the Governor did not claim to have voted for Reagan when it was illegal to do so.
Rather than simply “disappearing” this post, I’ll leave it up with this correction notice. My apologies to anyone who was misled by my reliance on the earlier version of that interviewer’s story.
*****
Republicans have a long history of bolstering their credentials by citing some Ronald Reagan connection. So it tends to be no big deal when a Republican pol waxes eloquent about having voted for Reagan.
And then there’s Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker (R), who recently said:
I remember, I was a teenager, had just become a teenager and voted for Ronald Reagan — limited government, you know, smaller government, lower taxes, strong national defense. You knew what you were getting. You knew how a Reagan administration, a Reagan presidency was going to be better for you.
Alas, since Walker was born on November 2, 1967, he “wasn’t old enough to vote in either 1980 or 1984 when Reagan ran for president.” So if Scott Walker was being truthful, then he’s just owned up to committing voter fraud.
Scott Walker Walks Into His Own Trap (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Walker tried to increase his appeal
With a “voted for Ron Reagan” spiel.
Do the math; Scott’s denoting
His under-age voting.
Fin’ly, ONE case of vote fraud that’s real.
Tags: Ronald Reagan, Scott Walker, Voter Fraud, Votes, Wisconsin
Posted in Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Scott Walker, Voting Satire, Wisconsin | 1 Comment »
Saturday, January 25th, 2014
As the fight over Oklahoma’s ban on same-sex marriage heads to the Tenth Circuit Court of Appeals in Denver, Colorado, Oklahoma Rep. Mike Turner (R-Edmond) is worried that gay marriage might prevail. And being desperate to combat the scourge of same-sex marriage, Turner has drafted a shell bill to use in case the case doesn’t go his way:
Mike’s Oklahoma “Solution” (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Mike Turner’s prevailed in his hunt
For an anti-same-sex marriage stunt.
If you’re gay or you’re straight
You can’t wed in his state,
Says his bill; Equal rights — Mike’s out front.
Tags: Constitution Verse, Gay Marriage, Law Satire, Legal Humor, Marriage Equality, Marriage Satire, Mike Turner, Oklahoma, Same Sex Marriage
Posted in Constitution Humor, GOP Humor, Homophobia, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Mike’s Oklahoma “Solution” (Limerick)
Tuesday, January 14th, 2014
Here we go again! It’s too early to pretend to run for U.S. President. So instead, Donald Trump is fake-running for Governor of New York State.
Trumped Up Campaign (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This brainchild (I trust) won’t get far:
New York Governor Trump — TV star.
He might run, Donald claims,
But we know his true aim’s
To get press for his show … or be czar.
Tags: Apprentice, Campaign Satire, Donald Trump, Governors, Media Humor, New York, Political Campaigns, Television
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Media Satire, New York Politics, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Television (TV) Satire | 3 Comments »
Thursday, December 5th, 2013
According to a Politico story, Republicans pols and staffers are being given remedial sensitivity training to avoid further Todd Akin-style gaffes and to contend with the party’s gender gap.
Those Sensitive Republicans
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Republicans, fearful of gaffes,
Are coaching both Congress and staffs
How to talk to a dame.
(Non-offense is their aim.)
How ’bout policy change, just for laughs?
Tags: Feminism, Gender Gap Humor, GOP Humor, Politico, Republican War On Women, Republicans Humor, Todd Akin
Posted in Congress Humor, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 11 Comments »
Friday, November 22nd, 2013
Most Democrats are pleased that Harry Reid finally pulled the trigger on a filibuster rules change. Mitch McConnell? Not so much!
Open Limerick From Mitch McConnell To Harry Reid
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Mitch to Harry: You’ll live to regret
The rule change you made. That’s a threat.
How dare you show fight!
Wreaking havoc’s our right.
Will we keep being evil? You bet!
Tags: Advise And Consent, Filibuster, Filibuster Humor, Harry Reid, Mitch McConnell, Nuclear Option, Obstructionism, Senate Democrats, Senate Humor
Posted in Constitutional Crisis, Democracy Humor, Filibuster Humor, GOP Humor, Harry Reid, Judiciary Satire, Legal Limericks, Mitch McConnell, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 1 Comment »
Thursday, October 24th, 2013
Exchangeable Views (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Republican stance is still no:
“Obamacare’s bad and must go.”
So explain why they bitch
That something they’d ditch
Does things they don’t want way too slow.
Tags: GOP Hypocrisy, Health Care, Health Care Exchanges, Health Insurance, Health Insurance Marketplace, HealthCare.gov, Insurance Humor, Obamacare, Obamacare Repeal, Republican Hypocrisy, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, Government Services, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 2 Comments »
Saturday, October 19th, 2013
How does John Boehner explain away and excuse his role in the government shutdown?
“I got overrun, that’s what happened.”
The “Overrun” Speaker (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
What is Boehner’s excuse? He’s got none,
Meekly claiming he “got overrun.”
He could scarcely be weaker;
His job as the Speaker
Is leading — he’s left it undone.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Extortion, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, John Boehner, Legislation Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington DC
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Leadership Humor, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor, Tea Parties, Washington, Wingnuts | 1 Comment »
Thursday, October 17th, 2013
The federal government’s reopened and the debt ceiling crisis was averted at the last minute. So the question now is, will this happen again? Alas, many experts believe we’re doomed to have yet another shutdown.
Doomed Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This crisis is over for now,
But for those who are wiping their brow,
Please keep this in mind:
The very same bind
May in merely three months take a bow.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Extortion, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Furloughed Employees, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, Legislation Satire, Republicans Humor, U.S. Senate, Washington DC
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Government Services, House Satire, Leadership Humor, Legislation Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Partisanship Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, RNC Humor, Senate Satire, Tax & Budget Humor, Tea Parties, Washington, Wingnuts | Comments Off on Doomed Limerick
Friday, October 11th, 2013
How sadly symbolic that the historic Senate clock’s no longer ticking, thanks to the government shutdown:
The team of curators that wind the 11-foot tall, nearly 200-year-old clock every week have been furloughed, the Secretary of the Senate confirms to NBC News. It was last wound on Monday, Sept. 30 — and more than a week into the shutdown, its hands are now frozen at 12:14.
The antique clock, known as the “Ohio Clock,” serves as a landmark for both reporters and senators, who regularly gather in the “Ohio Clock corridor.”
In DC, Not Even The Clocks Run Like Clockwork (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m alarmed by the old Senate clock,
Cuz they’ve furloughed its horary doc.
Near two centuries old–
The clock’s out in the cold
With no winders — no tick and no tock.
Tags: Art Curators, Furloughed Employees, Government Shutdown, Ohio Clock, Senate Clock, U.S. Senate, Washington DC
Posted in Congress Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, October 8th, 2013
In President Obama’s October 8 news conference about the current budget and debt ceiling stalemate with Republicans, Obama said: “We can’t make extortion routine as part of our democracy.”
Clean Messaging (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
We can’t make extortion routine,
Said Obama, and that’s why a clean
Bill for spending and debt
Is a requisite get,
Else democracy’s sure to careen.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Extortion, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, House Speaker, John Boehner, Legislation Satire, Obamacare Repeal, President Obama, Republicans Humor
Posted in 44 Humor, Barack Obama, Democracy Humor, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Government Services, Harry Reid, Health Satire, John Boehner, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington, White House, Wingnuts | 4 Comments »
Monday, September 30th, 2013
Limerick Ode To The Government Shutdown
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A government shutdown’s arrived–
An avoidable crisis contrived
By the wingnutty House,
Who blackmail and grouse
Over battles they’ve lost and revived.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, House Speaker, John Boehner, Legislation Satire, Obamacare Repeal, Republicans Humor
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Government Services, Health Satire, House Satire, John Boehner, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington, Wingnuts | 2 Comments »
Monday, September 30th, 2013
Open Limerick To “Speaker” Boehner
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Boehner, while reading the news,
I’m bewildered — it tends to confuse:
Either somebody stole
Your Speakership role,
Or you gave it to Senator Cruz.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, House Speaker, John Boehner, Legislation Satire, Obama Verse, Obamacare Repeal, Patriotism Humor, Republicans Humor, Ted Cruz
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Health Satire, House Satire, John Boehner, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington, Wingnuts | 3 Comments »
Saturday, September 28th, 2013
Bad news from the Republican-controlled House:
House Republicans will vote to pass a one-year delay of Obamacare in exchange for funding the government, a plan that drastically increases the chances of a government shutdown this Tuesday.
Discredit Where Discredit Is Due (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A government shutdown’s been forced
By Republicans, sadly divorced
From our nationwide needs.
It’s clear from their deeds:
They have fiscal disaster endorsed.
Tags: Blame Game, Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Government Default, Government Shutdown, Legislation Satire, Obama Verse, Obamacare Repeal, Patriotism Humor, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Health Satire, House Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington, Wingnuts | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, September 25th, 2013
“Party First” Politics (3-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When the government runs out of cash
And shuts down, then just who will you bash?
If you’re paying attention,
The party you’ll mention
Is Republican — that’s who you’ll trash.
But misinformation’s widespread
Cuz the public is constantly fed
Big Republican lies
Which attempt to disguise
Who would chop off the government’s head.
Yet the GOP’s mission is clear:
It’s a goal they’ve chased year after year
To stymie Obama,
No matter the trauma
To all that our nation holds dear.
Tags: Blame Game, Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Government Default, Legislation Satire, Obama Verse, Obamacare Repeal, Patriotism Humor, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, Blame Game, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, House Satire, Legislation Humor, Partisanship Satire, Patriotism Poems, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Washington, White House, Wingnuts | 5 Comments »
Tuesday, September 24th, 2013
Limerick Ode To Republican Hostage-Takers
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Fail to meet our demands? Then we’ll shoot.
Any deaths will be YOUR fault, to boot.”
That’s the GOP path
On their road laced with wrath.
Bottom line? Seems they don’t give a hoot.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, John Boehner, Legislation Satire, Obamacare Repeal, Patriotism Humor, Republicans Humor, Ted Cruz
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Health Satire, House Satire, John Boehner, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington, Wingnuts | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Republican Hostage-Takers
Monday, August 5th, 2013
Repellent Republicans (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“DC’s broken right through to the core,”
Yell Republican pols as they pore
Through old laws they’d repeal
(Who needs the New Deal?)
Determined to break it some more.
Tags: GOP Humor, GOP Idiocy, Legislation Humor, Medicaid, Medicare, New Deal, Nihilism Humor, Obamacare Repeal, Repeal Humor, Republicans Humor, Social Security, Washington DC
Posted in GOP Humor, Health Satire, House Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington | 33 Comments »
Sunday, July 14th, 2013
Limerick Ode To Zimmerman’s Florida
By Madeleine Begun Kane
If you’d rather shoot people than skeet,
And enjoy killing folks on the street,
But you don’t want to pay
Any price, come what may,
Then Florida’s (f)laws can’t be beat.
*****
Florida-style “Stand Your Ground” laws encourage the aggressive use of firearms based on vague (often bias-inspired) suspicions. And jury verdicts, like George Zimmerman’s acquittal in the Trayvon Martin murder case, only serve to further encourage and rubber stamp murderous behavior.
Tags: Crime & Punishment, Firearms, Florida, George Zimmerman, Gun Control, Gun Humor, Gun Laws, Law Satire, Legal Verse, Racism, Second Amendment, Stand Your Ground Law, Trayvon Martin, Trial Humor, Vigilante, Weapon Humor
Posted in Crime, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Legal Limericks, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Public Safety, Republicans Humor | 6 Comments »
Monday, July 8th, 2013
The Kansas legislature, in its great wisdom, recently passed a law allowing gun owners to carry weapons in public buildings. And surprise, surprise, insurance companies think this is dangerous.
The EMC Insurance Cos. insures 85 percent to 90 percent of all Kansas school districts and has refused to renew coverage for schools that permit teachers and custodians to carry concealed firearms on their campuses under the new law, which took effect July 1. It’s not a political decision, but a financial one based on the riskier climate it estimates would be created, the insurer said.
Kansas Gun Law Backfires (Multi-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
In municipal spots, like a school,
Concealed weapons in Kansas are cool.
But the pols that decreed this
May soon have to heed this:
They’ve entered a sky-high risk pool.
“You are too great a risk,” said the co
That insured Kansas schools. What a blow!
“We do NOT mean to screw you,
But just can’t renew you.
It’s financial — a matter of dough.”
Forrest Knox, who’s an NRA shill
And the fellow who sponsored the bill
That started this mess,
Says insurers should bless
Teachers toting their weapons at will.
“This will make us all safer,” he swears.
“What do carriers know about scares,
And dangers and risk
And hazards. Tsk-Tsk!
I know better than they!” he declares.
What’s next? It remains to be seen.
At the least, it will take far more green
To insure any school
Where an NRA tool
Hides a gun in her purse or his jean.
Tags: Custodians, Education Humor, EMC Insurance, Forrest Knox, Gun Humor, Insurance Coverage, Insurance Humor, Kansas, Legislation Humor, NRA, Risk Pool, School Safety, Schools, Teachers, Weapon Humor
Posted in Education Limerick, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Insurance Humor, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Public Safety, Republicans Humor | 5 Comments »
Friday, June 28th, 2013
Ohio State Sen. Nina Turner’s proposed bill regulating men’s reproductive health inspired this multi-verse limerick:
A Modest Men’s Reproductive Health Reg Proposal (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Republican men who insist
On controlling gals’ bodies, we’re pissed.
Since what’s good for the goose
(It’s plain to deduce)
Suits the gander, I’ve drawn up this list:
Viagra henceforth is restricted
To those who can prove they’re afflicted
Via sex partner swearing
You’re impotent, sharing
Your plight through oath uncontradicted.
You must also sex therapy seek
To help you reach sexual peak.
And we’ll force you to take
A stress test, you rake,
And prove that your heart isn’t weak.
In addition, your doc must advise you
About celibacy and apprise you
It’s a “viable choice.”
Yes your doc must give voice
To your options, cuz some may surprise you.
Only then, will the state let your doc
Prescribe any meds for your cock.
After counsel advising
Of side effects rising
From ED pills — nothing to mock.
From then on, you’ll be monitored too
To make sure that your heart ain’t askew.
You’ll be checked and re-tested.
The state is invested
In protecting you guys when you screw.
If you think that such regs are intrusive,
Insulting, and even abusive,
All these rules don’t compare
To what women must bear:
Female freedom is gravely elusive.
Tags: Abortion Rights, Birth Control Limerick, ED, Erectile Dysfunction, Feminism, Feminist Limerick, Gender Humor, Gender Inequality, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Impotence Humor, Legislation Humor, Men's Health, Nina Turner, Ohio, Reproductive Health Humor, Reproductive Rights, Republicans Humor, Viagra Humor, Women's Health
Posted in Abortion Rights, Birth Control Humor, Constitution Humor, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Wingnuts | 19 Comments »
Thursday, June 27th, 2013
The U.S. Supreme Court’s hypocritical demolishment of the Voting Rights Act, followed by a rush by certain states to impose discriminatory voting restrictions, inspired this three-verse limerick:
The Supreme Court Preclears Voter Suppression (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Sev’ral states who once had to preclear
Any voting law change, gave a cheer:
The Supremes set them free
To restrict votes with glee,
Which they’re doing with plans in high gear.
In its holding, both sneaky and bold,
The Sup Court said the formula’s old,
And so need not be heeded–
A new one is needed:
It freed states to fair-voting withhold.
Some are doing just that with great speed,
Which proves that old formula’s need–
That it wasn’t outdated:
Bad intent’s unabated,
And there’s nothing to stop its stampede.
Tags: Constitution Verse, Judiciary Satire, Supreme Court Limerick, U.S. Constitution, U.S. Supreme Court, Voter ID, Voting Limerick, Voting Rights Act, VRA
Posted in Constitution Humor, Democracy Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Judiciary Satire, Justice Department, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Supreme Court, Voting Satire | 3 Comments »
Doomed Limerick
Thursday, October 17th, 2013The federal government’s reopened and the debt ceiling crisis was averted at the last minute. So the question now is, will this happen again? Alas, many experts believe we’re doomed to have yet another shutdown.
Doomed Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This crisis is over for now,
But for those who are wiping their brow,
Please keep this in mind:
The very same bind
May in merely three months take a bow.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Extortion, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Furloughed Employees, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, Legislation Satire, Republicans Humor, U.S. Senate, Washington DC
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Government Services, House Satire, Leadership Humor, Legislation Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Partisanship Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, RNC Humor, Senate Satire, Tax & Budget Humor, Tea Parties, Washington, Wingnuts | Comments Off on Doomed Limerick