Archive for the ‘Computer Humor’ Category
Wednesday, October 26th, 2011
Sleep-Deprived Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
An inventor was trying to nap,
But snoozing just wasn’t on tap.
His constant fixation
With tech innovation
Required a sleep-prompting app.
(Author’s Note: I’m not an inventor, but I’m a life-long insomniac who could use such an application.)
Tags: Application, Aps Humor, Computer Verse, Insomnia Humor, Insomnia Verse, Inventions Poem, Sleep Poetry, Technology Humor, Technology Limerick
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Computer Humor, Limericks, Sleep & Insomnia Humor, Technology Humor | 4 Comments »
Thursday, October 20th, 2011
No Siri for me — I’m serious!
I’m referring to Apple’s wise-cracking, female-voiced digital personal assistant, now available on the iPhone 4S.
Limerick Ode to the iPhone’s Siri
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There’s a newfangled Apple bot, Siri—
A bantering gal, rather eerie.
What a talkative lass!
I’m planning to pass.
Would a male bot be somewhat less cheery?
Tags: Apple, Artificial Intelligence, Bot Humor, Cell Phones, Computer Verse, Digital Personal Assistant, IPhone, Robots, Siri, Technology Humor, Telephone Verse
Posted in Computer Humor, Limericks, Odd Trends, Technology Humor, Telephone Humor, Weird News Snark | 3 Comments »
Thursday, September 29th, 2011
Fickle Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A popular gal who was fickle
Found herself in a terrible pickle:
A fellow she spurned
Launched a web site that turned
Her long wooers-list into a trickle.
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Computer Humor, Dating Limerick, Relationships Poetry, Technology Humor
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Computer Humor, Dating Humor, Relationship Humor, Technology Humor | 6 Comments »
Thursday, September 22nd, 2011
Regular readers know that Facebook’s News Ticker has been driving me mad! It’s also driven me to write three anti-Facebook limericks.
If you share my problem, or if you simply feel sorry for me, you’ll be pleased to know I’ve uncovered a solution: Google Chrome has an extension that makes Facebook’s annoying Ticker vanish.
I’ve installed it and the extension works great. No more News Ticker. Yippee!
Time to celebrate with a limerick:
No Longer Tickered Out
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My outlook is better today
Cuz I’ve sent Facebook’s Ticker away:
Yes, a cool Chrome extension
Does Ticker prevention.
To Google, big thanks and hooray!
Tags: Chrome Extensions, Computer Verse, Facebook Limerick, Google, News Feed, Scrolling, Social Media Poetry, Stress Humor, Technology Humor
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Google, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, September 21st, 2011
I’ve been trying to find something good to say about Facebook’s new News Feed, and here it is: It’s very inspirational! Last night it inspired me to write this dizzy limerick. And now I’ve written two more:
If you like things that constantly flicker,
You’re sure to enjoy Facebook’s ticker.
As for me, I must flee:
My sore brain needs Chablis,
So I’m off for some Advil and liquor.
*****
I am not one to bitch and to bicker,
But I hate Facebook’s stupid new ticker.
It makes my brain ache!
How much more can I take?
Enough with the scrolling and flicker!
*****
(Here’s a fun post about limericks, where you can submit your own.)
UPDATE: Good news! I’ve found a solution to Facebook’s terrible News Ticker problem. You can read all about it here, including a celebratory limerick.
Tags: ADD Humor, Attention Deficit Humor, Computer Verse, Drinking Limerick, Facebook Limerick, Liquor Humor, News Feed, Scrolling, Social Media Poetry, Stress Humor, Technology Humor
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor | 21 Comments »
Wednesday, September 21st, 2011
Much to my surprise, I’ve found myself defending Facebook lately. For instance, I think its new subscription feature is a great idea. But an even newer change is driving me nuts — the ever-scrolling News Feed on the upper right corner of the screen. The damn thing is making me so dizzy, I can’t even think straight.
Limerick Ode To Facebook’s Dizzying Changes
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Facebook, you’re making me dizzy
Cuz your feed on the right is too busy.
I’ll say this politely:
Your scrolling’s unsightly.
I am now in an A.D.D. tizzy.
(I’ve written two more limericks about Facebook’s annoying new Ticker here.)
UPDATE: Good news! I’ve found a solution to Facebook’s terrible News Ticker problem. You can read all about it here, including a celebratory limerick.
Tags: ADD Humor, Attention Deficit Humor, Computer Verse, Facebook Limerick, New Feed, Scrolling, Social Media Poetry, Technology Humor
Posted in Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor | 7 Comments »
Wednesday, August 24th, 2011
Telecommuting Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow who telecommuted
Had a short trip to work — undisputed.
His bed and PC
Were as close as can be.
Yet his tardiness got the guy booted.
Tags: Business Verse, Commuters, Computer Verse, Lateness Humor, PC Humor, Technology Humor, Telecommuting, Workplace & Career Humor
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Business Humor, Commuting Verse, Computer Humor, House & Home Humor, Limericks, Technology Humor, Workplace & Career Humor | 13 Comments »
Thursday, July 14th, 2011
A Limerick Ode To My Husband Mark Kane
By Madeleine Begun Kane
You’re in Facebook at last — Hip Hooray!
Till this morning, you kept saying “Nay!”
The reason is clear
Why you’re finally here:
I’ve joined Google-Plus as of today!
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Computer Humor, Facebook Limerick, Google, GooglePlus, Husbands & Wives, Internet Verse, Technology Limerick
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Google, Internet Humor, Marriage Humor, Personal, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, July 12th, 2011
Limerick Ode To Google+
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Would-be early adopters are pining.
For Google-Plus entry they’re whining.
Invitees get to brag:
“I got in, while you lag.”
A great come-on of Google’s designing.
(You can find me on GooglePlus here. And you always find my Google+ link on my right sidebar a bit below my photo.)
Tags: Computer Verse, Early adopters, Google, GooglePlus, Social Marketing, Social Media Poetry, Technology Humor
Posted in Business Humor, Communication Humor, Computer Humor, Google, Internet Humor, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor | 8 Comments »
Friday, June 24th, 2011
Dear Facebook: Get Up To Speed
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Facebook seems sluggish of late.
First I click, then I wait and I wait.
It’s getting annoying —
No longer enjoying
My visits. I’m getting irate.
Tags: Computer Verse, Facebook Humor, Impatience, Social Media Poetry, Technology Humor
Posted in Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor | 8 Comments »
Thursday, April 21st, 2011
Digital Impasse
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My brain is packed with secret codes
To access all my stuff,
Like bank accounts and sundry cards.
Recalling them is rough.
I pay my bills online and need
A PIN for each of those.
My website has a password too,
Protecting verse and prose.
These letters, numbers, symbols mix
In ways to stave off theft.
We’re warned to make them quite complex,
Defeating hackers deft.
We’re also cautioned, “Vary them.
Don’t make your codes the same.
A thief gets hold of only one —
You’re screwed and you’re to blame.”
So ciphers clutter up my mind.
I dare not write them down.
With paper bearing secrets dear,
A thief could go to town.
I’m forced to hide them in my brain —
A codified morass,
Despite my fear that one day soon
They’ll flee my mind en masse.
(Prompted by secrets at Poets United.)
Tags: Banking Humor, Bill Paying Poem, Brain Humor, Codes, Computer Humor, Computer Security, Cyber Crime, Hacker Humor, Memory, Online Humor, Passwords Humor, Privacy Humor, Secrets, Technology Verse, Theft
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Computer Humor, Crime & Punishment Humor, Internet Humor, Memory Humor, Privacy Satire, Technology Humor | 28 Comments »
Tuesday, April 19th, 2011
Creative Keys (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When you’re whipping your verse into shape
And you’re caught in a rhyme-challenged scrape,
The delete key is handy,
Assisted by brandy,
And last, but not least, try escape.
(Prompted to escape)
Tags: Brandy Humor, Computer Humor, Creativity, Editing Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Advice Humor & Poems, Computer Humor, Creativity Verse, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Technology Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor | 28 Comments »
Friday, April 15th, 2011
Limerick Ode To Voicemail
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear voicemail, I love and adore you.
And I’m puzzled by those who deplore you.
Oh, the charm of your voices
And all of those choices.
Wait, I’m lying — I really abhor you.
(Related Humor: The Outgoing Message I’d Love To (But Probably Shouldn’t) Leave On My Answering Machine (Limerick))
Tags: Phone Humor, Telephone Verse, Voicemail Humor
Posted in Communication Humor, Computer Humor, Limericks, Social Satire, Technology Humor, Telephone Humor | 9 Comments »
Thursday, March 17th, 2011
Designing programs
for software business clients —
command performance.
*****
Military gifts
like General Patton’s patch —
commanding presents.
*****
Want satisfaction
when your weapon’s sarcasm?
Pick a smart target.
*****
An unrooted soul
steps on the joy of others
and roots for failure.
*****
Meaningful haiku
that’s smart, breezy, yet mellow —
ticklish challenge.
*****
(Haiku Heights commands prompts us to write haiku using the word command; One Single Impression wants us to be sarcastic; Sensational Haiku Wednesday roots for us to write haiku; and Three Word Wednesday prompts us to use breeze, mellow, and tickle in one fell swoop.)
Tags: Computer Software, Computer Verse, Gift Humor, Haiku & Senryu, Military Humor, Sarcasm Humor, Writing Haiku
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Computer Humor, Haiku & Senryu, Poetry & Prompts, Telephone Humor | 27 Comments »
Saturday, March 5th, 2011
I’ve just discovered a new search engine that, believe it or not, does stuff that Google can’t do. It’s the newly launched Greplin, and you can read all about its young founder Daniel Gross here.
So what’s the big deal about Greplin? It indexes and lets you search stuff that’s stored up in the “cloud.” Things like your Facebook posts, Twitter tweets, G-mail, Google Docs, LinkedIn posts, business applications I’m unfamiliar with, etc.
Let’s take its Facebook interface, for instance. Just put a key word or phrase into its search box and up pops a list of your posts (and your friends’ posts) using that word or phrase. I’m finding it so handy, I even wrote this haiku:
Forecast Not Cloudy
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Greplin’s great engine
is searching what Google can’t,
and I’m on cloud nine.
Tags: Cloud Computing, Computer Software, Daniel Gross, Facebook, Gmail, Google, Greplin, Internet Humor, Linked-In, Search Engines, Technology Review, Twitter, Web Humor
Posted in Business Humor, Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Haiku & Senryu, Internet Humor, Search Engine Tools, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor, Twitter Humor | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, February 22nd, 2011
Each year our calendars are jam-packed with weird, oddball holidays created, presumably, by equally weird people. Since I’m just as odd as the next person, I figure I’m entitled to invent one too … assuming I can come up with something strange that isn’t already taken.
Anyway, while scrolling through several calendars specializing in bizarre holidays, I noticed a startling omission. Apparently, nobody’s thought to invent All My Gizmos Are Working Day. That is, until now.
So with the powers vested in me as a member in good standing of the New York State Bar, I hereby declare March 2, 2011 to be the first annual All My Gizmos Are Working Day.
As you might expect, I’m commemorating this spanking new holiday with a limerick. But before I get to my verse, let me first acknowledge that most people won’t be able to really celebrate All My Gizmos Are Working Day on March 2nd. In fact, there’s a good chance I won’t be able to enjoy it either.
Why not? Because I can’t remember the last time that I didn’t have at least one broken gadget — a kitchen appliance, TV, DVD player, stereo, land line, cell phone, computer, e-book reader, MP3 player, etc. At least one electronic thingamajig is always misbehaving.
But hope springs eternal, right? So here’s my celebratory limerick:
Limerick Ode To All My Gizmos Are Working Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
All My Gizmos Are Working Day’s here.
March 2nd’s that day of good cheer.
If, alas, you’re disgusted
Cuz something is busted,
Try again on March 2nd next year.
(Inspired by Big Tent’s anti-holiday prompt.)
UPDATE: I’ve learned that March 26th is Make up your own Holiday Day.
Tags: All My Gizmos Are Working Day, Broken Gadgets Verse, Calendar Humor, Computer Verse, Gadget Humor, Gizmos, Holiday Satire, Law Humor, Limerick, Make Up Your Own Holiday Day, March Holidays, Odd Holidays, Technology Limerick, Weird Celebrations
Posted in Celebrations Poetry, Computer Humor, Holiday Humor, Humor Columns & Humorous Essays, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Social Satire, Technology Humor, Weird News Snark | 22 Comments »
Monday, February 21st, 2011
Somebody please explain to me why Facebook invented and retains the stupid Poke feature. In the meantime, here’s my A Poke In The Facebook limerick.
A Poke In The Facebook
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Facebook friends, please do not poke.
I don’t care if you’re female or bloke.
If you’ve something to say,
Use the commenting way.
Or message me. Pokes are a joke.
Tags: Communication Humor, Facebook Humor, Facebook Limerick, Facebook Pokes, Social Networking Humor, Technology Verse
Posted in Communication Humor, Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Limericks, Social Media Humor, Technology Humor | 4 Comments »
Thursday, December 9th, 2010
When Facebook makes changes, they usually annoy me. But I must admit that I mostly like Facebook’s new format and profiles, now that I’m getting used to them.
However, I do have one limerick-worthy peeve which you may have experienced — the now-you-see-it-now-you-don’t line of five photos that (sometimes) sits near the top of our pages.
So I bring you my Ode to AWOL Faces on Facebook:
Ode To AWOL Faces On Facebook
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Sometimes lines of five photos appear
Near the top. Then they vanish. Oh, dear!
Facebook’s done it again.
I will have to try Zen
To cope with this format’s premiere.
Tags: Computer Humor, Facebook Limerick, Photos, Profiles, Technology Verse
Posted in Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Limericks, Technology Humor | Comments Off on Ode To AWOL Faces On Facebook
Monday, October 4th, 2010
Movie audiences sure seem to love Aaron Sorkin’s The Social Network, even if Facebook’s main founder Mark Zuckerberg doesn’t.
Hubby Mark and I saw it Saturday night and we certainly enjoyed it. And that brings me to my limerick review of this delightful film about Facebook’s founding and the lawsuits it inspired:
The Social Network (Limerick Review)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Social Network’s a wonderful flick —
Snappy dialogue — listen, it’s quick.
Depositions are used
Rather well — I’m amused.
As for Oscars this year, it’s my pick.
Tags: Aaron Sorkin, Computer Verse, Entertainment Limerick, Facebook Limerick, Films, Flick Limerick, Legal Limerick, Mark Zuckerberg, Movie Reviews, Movies, Oscars, Social Network Review, Technology Verse
Posted in Business Humor, Computer Humor, Entertainment Humor, Facebook Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Movie & Play Humor, Public Figures, Technology Humor | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, September 22nd, 2010
The movie about Facebook, The Social Network, has been getting a ton of publicity this week. So I wonder if Facebook’s outages today were caused by the extra publicity, or just an unfortunate coincidence.
Of course I immediately went into Facebook withdrawal and wrote this pair of haiku:
I think Facebook’s down.
Where to go to confirm this?
On Twitter, of course.
and
Facebook back — Hurray!
Have I cheered prematurely?
So Twitter tells me.
Tags: Computer Verse, Facebook Humor, Haiku & Senryu, Movies, Social Networking Humor, Twitter Verse, Web Addict, Web Withdrawal
Posted in Addiction Humor, Computer Humor, Facebook Humor, Haiku & Senryu, Technology Humor, Twitter Humor | Comments Off on Some Fun With Facebook’s Outage
