Archive for the ‘GOP Humor’ Category
Thursday, September 17th, 2009
South Carolina’s Governor Mark Sanford sure has expensive travel habits for such a “frugal conservative.”
The Not-So-Frugal Traveler (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Making staffers use each Post-It side,
Mark Sanford would wastefulness chide.
Then he’d charter a plane,
Throwing cash down the drain.
Sanford sure took his state for a ride.
Related Posts: Ode to Mark “Sweet Talker” Sanford; Mark Sanford’s Trail … Of Hypocrisy; and Mark Sanford — Lost? Or Losing It?
Tags: Conservatives Satire, Frugality, Governor Sanford, Philanderers, Planes, Republican Hypocrisy, South Carolina, Travel Expenses, Womanizers
Posted in GOP Humor, Governors Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Mark Sanford, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor, Wingnuts | Comments Off on Mark Sanford, The Not-So-Frugal Traveler
Friday, September 4th, 2009
Remember when a presidential speech to school kids was considered positive and uncontroversial? Back when Republicans were in the White House? Funny, what a difference one election can make.
President Obama wants to address schoolchildren about working hard, being responsible and playing by the rules, and all hell breaks loose:
Republicans Bring Classiness To the Classroom (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Act responsibly. Stay in your schools.”
“Study hard and please play by the rules.”
How dare the Prez preach
Such sins in his speech!
Ain’t no way to breed right-wing tools.
Related Posts: “Education President” Song; Education Humor; and Bush Isn’t An “Education President,” He Just Plays One
Tags: Education, GOP, Hypocrisy, Obama, Presidential Speech, Republicans Humor, Schools, Values Verse
Posted in Barack Obama, Education Limerick, GOP Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Social Satire, Speeches Satire, Students Verse, White House | 6 Comments »
Thursday, September 3rd, 2009
New Hampshire’s Senator Judd Gregg, a big “majority rules” fan back when Republicans held the majority, has suddenly become a minority rights advocate. I just can’t imagine why.
Way back when, Gregg was enthused about using filibuster-proof reconciliation rules to pass ANWR drilling legislation:
… “The point, of course, is this: If you have 51 votes for your position, you win,” Gregg told his Senate colleagues on the floor.
He added, “Reconciliation is a rule of the Senate (that) has been used before for purposes exactly like this on numerous occasions… Is there something wrong with majority rules? I don’t think so.”
Responding to the argument that it’s wrong to use reconciliation on a domestic oil drilling measure, Gregg concluded, “We are using the rules of the Senate as they are set up to be used, and that happens to be the rule of the Senate.”
Of course now that there’s a Democratic majority, Gregg has a rather different opinion and is leading the Republican fight against passing health care reform under reconciliation rules:
Sen. Judd Gregg has hundreds of procedural objections ready for a healthcare plan Democrats leaders want to speed through the Senate.
Gregg (N.H.), the senior Republican on the Budget Committee, told the Hill in a recent interview that Republicans will wage a vicious fight if Democrats try to circumvent Senate rules and use a budget maneuver to pass a trillion dollar healthcare plan with a simple majority. […]
Gregg said that Republicans could file “hundreds” of points of order objections to the bill, each one requiring 60 votes to waive.
“We are very much engaged in taking a hard look at our rights under reconciliation,” Gregg said. “It would be very contentious.”
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Ode To Senator Judd “Majority Rules, Except When It Doesn’t” Gregg
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Majority rule is just great,”
Said Gregg in the drilling debate.
“You’ve got 51 votes,
Then you win.” Check his quotes.
Yet 51 Dem votes don’t rate.
Related Posts: Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: ANWR Oil Drilling, Filibusters, Health Care Reform, Health Humor, Judd Gregg, Legislation Humor, Majority Rules, Minority Rights, Republican Hypocrisy
Posted in Filibuster Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Hypocrisy Humor, Judd Gregg, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 2 Comments »
Thursday, August 27th, 2009
From time to time, I write an alphabetical poem summing up a period’s zany and significant political moments. (My last one said goodbye and good riddance to Bush and Cheney.)
Although Barack Obama’s administration is still relatively new, there’s already plenty of material for another piece of alpha-political poetry:
A is for Alaska with its lovely Russian view.
B is for the Birthers who will rant and rave on cue.
C is for conservatives co-opted by the loons.
D is for each Democrat who caves and often swoons.
E is for elections that just never seem to stop.
F’s for raising endless funds so pols will stay on on top.
G’s for GOPers who so love to misinform.
H is for our health care — much in need of broad reform.
I is for insurance co’s. They love the status quo.
J’s for Joseph Lieberman. He really needs to go.
K’s for Teddy Kennedy whose legacy is great.
L is for Rush Limbaugh whose big talent’s spreading hate.
M’s for John McCain who’s always on a Sunday show.
N’s for nihilist congressmen, so fond of saying “No!”
O is for Obama. Hope he’s worthy of his rise.
P is for Fox pundits and their “fair and balanced” lies.
Q is for the questions town hall crackpots often pose.
R’s for right-wing zealots who are truthful-info foes.
S is for Mark Sanford’s Argentinean affair.
T’s for Texans Perry and Pete Sessions. What a pair!
U is the USA. There’s greatness at its core.
V’s for fam’ly values preached by hypocrites galore.
W’s for Dubya and the mess he left behind.
X and Y and Z are hard. Their rhymes I can not find.
Tags: Conservatives Satire, GOP Lies, House Republicans, Obama poem, Republican Hypocrisy, Senate Humor
Posted in GOP Humor, Political Commentary, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Wingnuts | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, August 18th, 2009
Watching Republicans out-maneuver President Obama on “bi-partisan” health care reform has been so painful, I sometimes feel forced to avert my eyes. So I’ve written this open double limerick to President Obama:
An Open Limerick To President Obama
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Obama, the GOP’s clear:
Won’t support any health reform. Hear?
You can whittle the bill
Down to bupkis — you still
Won’t get votes. Yes they’ve duped you, I fear.
Your naivety’s hurting our cause.
And so how about taking a pause?
Work with Dems on the Hill
To create a fresh bill
That has nary a GOP clause.
Related Posts: Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: Bipartisanship, Democrats Humor, GOP Lies, Health Care, Health Reform, Legislation Satire, Negotiations, Obama Verse, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 7 Comments »
Sunday, August 16th, 2009
Republican hypocrisy is stunning. Almost everyone who’s been throwing around the “death panel” epithet used to have a very different opinion of end-of-life-care planning:
1) Back in her half-term as Alaska governor, Sarah Palin spoke out for advance healthcare directives in her 2008 Healthcare Decision Day Proclamation.
2) Rush Limbaugh enthusiastically read ad copy championing LegalZoom.com, whose services include do-it-yourself living wills.
3) Newt Gingrich recently advocated for advance directives (end-of-life planning) in his July 2nd Washington Post column.
4) Most Senate and House Republicans voted to fund counseling for end-of-life issues and care in George W. Bush’s 2003 Medicare prescription drug bill.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Sarah and Limbaugh and Newt,
Put your “death panel” nonsense on mute.
Cuz you once were big fans
Of end-of-life plans.
Were they “death panels” too? Now please scoot!
Related Posts: An Open Limerick To President Obama; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: Death Panels, End-of-Life Care, Health Care Reform, Health Humor, Healthcare Directives, Living Wills, Medicare Satire, Newt Gingrich, Republican Hypocrisy, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin Limerick
Posted in GOP Humor, Health Satire, Hypocrisy Humor, Insurance Humor, Legislation Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rush Limbaugh, Sarah Palin | 3 Comments »
Thursday, August 6th, 2009
Planning to attend a local town hall meeting about health care reform? Hoping to learn something and to express your opinion?
Well, be sure to bring a pair of ear plugs. Because the only thing you’re likely to hear is an enraged, screaming mob. And the only thing you’re likely to learn is that it’s frustrating and possibly dangerous to be a Democratic Congressperson.
Here’s my limerick about the right-wing scheme to stifle intelligent discussion of the issues by inciting angry mobs to shout down these meetings.
Tantrum Politics
By Madeleine Begun Kane
If reform can’t be fought using facts,
Simply give civil discourse the ax.
Block discussion with mobs
Packed with morons like Dobbs.
That’s the path of Republican hacks.
Related Posts: An Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: Congress Humor, Health Care, Insurance Reform, Lou Dobbs, Mobs, Scare Tactics, Tantrums, Town Hall Meetings
Posted in Congress Humor, Democracy Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, House Satire, Insurance Humor, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Wingnuts | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, August 4th, 2009
Back in July, South Carolina Senator Jim DeMint bragged about Republican plans to “break” Obama. How? By killing health care reform, turning health care into Obama’s “Waterloo.”
So it’s no surprise that the President’s foes are wielding the Big Lie in their non-stop efforts to block reform. Or that their lies target the elderly, scaring them into thinking Democrats intend to mandate elder-euthanasia.
This brings me to my latest limerick, Waterloo Lies:
Waterloo Lies
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The GOP’s spreading big lies
To ensure that our health reform dies:
“The bill will kill gran —
Shorten seniors’ life span.”
Their goal? Cut Barack down to size.
Update: Check out the interesting and informative Health Wonk Review.
Related Posts: An Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; and Tantrum Politics
Tags: Big Lie, Elderly, Euthanasia, Health Care, Insurance Reform, Jim DeMint, Obama, Reform, Republicans Humor, Scare Tactics, South Carolina, Waterloo
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, James DeMint, Legislation Humor, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, South Carolina Humor, White House | 3 Comments »
Sunday, July 5th, 2009
Help! I can’t keep those Republican governors straight. For instance, why is Sarah Palin giving up her Alaska Governor gig? Some sort of wildlife scandal involving “dead fish” and a “lame duck?”
Flailin’ Palin (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Political blogs are atwitter
With news of Gov. Palin, the quitter.
Is it scandal or plans
To join prez also-rans?
Once aglitter, she’s GOP litter.
Tags: Alaska, Governor Palin, Governors, Lame Duck, Republicans Humor, Scandals
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Governors Humor, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Sarah Palin, White House | 7 Comments »
Wednesday, July 1st, 2009
South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford shouldn’t resign because he’s an unfaithful, lying, hypocrite … although he’s all that and more. He should resign because he’s a moron! Only a blithering idiot could, in one breath, publicly describe his lover as his “soul mate” and, in the next breath, vow to salvage his marriage and fall back in love with his wife, Jenny.
Ode to Mark “Sweet Talker” Sanford
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Sanford, you need to stay mum
Cuz your statements are dumb as they come.
Tell me: Why would your wife
Take you back in this life,
When your soul mate’s another? You bum!
Tags: Jenny Sanford, Mark Sanford, Philanderers, Scandals, South Carolina, Womanizers
Posted in Family Values Humor, GOP Humor, Governors Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Mark Sanford, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor | 3 Comments »
Wednesday, June 24th, 2009
All the explanations for Gov. Mark Sanford’s absence — the recharging, the writing, the catching up on projects, the naked Appalachian Trail hiking — are officially inoperative. Come to think of it, Sanford did take a hike — from his obligations to his wife and family and to his constituents.
A secret Argentinean affair! Wow! You have to give the righteous Republican Brownie points for creativity:
Mark Sanford’s Trail … Of Hypocrisy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The myst’ry of Sanford is solved.
We have learned an affair is involved.
Argentinean tryst!
Now that’s quite a twist.
Say goodbye to his Prez hopes. Dissolved!
Tags: Affairs, Argentina, Governors, Hypocrisy, Mark Sanford, Philanderers, Republicans Humor, Scandals, South Carolina, Womanizers
Posted in Family Values Humor, GOP Humor, Governors Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Mark Sanford, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor | 4 Comments »
Thursday, June 4th, 2009
Republicans have no shortage of things to fulminate about. One of their favorites? The General Motors bankruptcy:
Bankrupt Values (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
An auto co known as GM
In the past was considered a gem.
It’s in bankruptcy now.
Will that hurt? Yes, and how!
But the GOP’s goal? Blame the Dem!
(You can find my lighter car humor columns and limericks here.)
Tags: Automobiles, Bankruptcy, Blame, Cars, Democrats, Economy, Finance, General Motors, GM, GOP, Law Satire, Money, Obama, Republicans Humor, Values
Posted in Automobiles Satire, Barack Obama, Blame Game, Business Humor, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Bankrupt Values
Monday, May 25th, 2009
The omni-presence of Dick and Liz Cheney on (as Rachel Maddow loves to call it) “the TV machine” is nearly enough to get me to toss out my televisions. Of course, to have even a shot at avoiding their tortured lies, I’d have to cancel my Net connection, throw out my radios, and avert my eyes in the unlikely event that I encounter a newspaper.
Ode To The Deceitful Cheneys (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There once was a daughter named Liz
Who joined in the family biz.
The business was lying,
With all members vying
For liar-in-chief — each a wiz.
Tags: Dick Cheney Satire, Gitmo, Liars, Lies, Liz Cheney, Media, National Security, Newspapers, Rachel Maddow, Television, Torture
Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, Family Values Humor, Foreign Policy, Gitmo Humor, GOP Humor, Liz Cheney, Media Satire, National Security Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Rachel Maddow, Republicans Humor, Torture Humor | 8 Comments »
Saturday, May 16th, 2009
Republicans are truly gifted at changing the subject, and the media falls for it every time. Take CIA torture, for instance. Is the media focusing on who in the Bush administration broke the law and ordered torture? Of course not! Instead, the topic’s morphed into whether Nancy Pelosi is lying when she says the CIA misled Congress about torture.
Following Republican logic is never an easy task. But from what I can gather, here’s the Republican position: Bush’s CIA did nothing wrong, & Pelosi could have and should have stopped them.
In honor of the Republicans tortured position on torture, I’ve written them a theme song to the tune of Stephen Foster’s Camptown Races:
The “We Did Nothing Wrong, & Nancy Should Have Stopped Us” Song
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The CIA did nothing wrong.
Doo-da, Doo-da.
Pelosi knew and went along.
Oh, de doo-da day.
Torture is always right.
Torture can make our day.
And Nancy’s nothing but a lying nag.
She could have got in the way.
Interrogation must be tough.
Doo-da, Doo-da.
Pelosi knew we got too rough.
Oh, de doo-da day.
Never did break no laws.
Torture? Who, us? No way!
Pelosi’s nothing but a lying hag.
Nancy would lead you astray.
The CIA protects us all.
Doo-da, Doo-da.
It’s time Pelosi took the fall.
Oh, de doo-da day.
Torture was never done.
Torture is lots of fun.
And Nancy’s nothing but a lying nag.
Nancy Pelosi should pay.
Tags: Bush, CIA, Congress Humor, Interrogation, Media, Music, Nancy Pelosi, Republicans Humor, Song Parody, Stephen Foster, Torture, Waterboarding
Posted in CIA Satire, Congress Humor, GOP Humor, House Satire, Iraq War Humor, Media Satire, Pelosi Verse, Political Commentary, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Song Parodies | 4 Comments »
Thursday, May 14th, 2009
Republicans (and Joe Lieberman) have been staging yet another temper tantrum. What’s their grievance du jour? Speaker Nancy Pelosi said CIA leaders misled Congress about interrogation techniques.
My Homage To Feigned Outrage
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The CIA’s under attack
By the Speaker who gave it a smack.
She accused it of lying.
The GOP’s crying:
She’s mean and must take it all back.
Tags: CIA, Congress Humor, Feigned Outrage, Interrogation, Lieberman, Lies, Nancy Pelosi, Republicans Humor, Torture, Waterboarding
Posted in CIA Satire, Congress Humor, GOP Humor, House Satire, Iraq War Humor, Joe Lieberman, Pelosi Verse, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Torture Humor | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, May 12th, 2009
President Obama recently used the e-word in connection with his yet-to-be-named U.S. Supreme Court nominee, and the Republicans were (or pretended to be) horrified. Senator Orrin Hatch claimed empathy was a “code word for an activist judge”, while the ever-entertaining Michael Steele said in his inimitable, classy fashion, “I’ll give you empathy. Empathize right on your behind!”
But while many Democrats were outraged by Republican reaction, I’m empathetic enough to appreciate where they’re coming from:
Empathy is such an ugly word:
Injudicious moral flaw.
Empathy is totally absurd
And violates the rule of law.
(With my apologies to Billy Joel)
(My previous (and full length) song parody to this song is here.)
Tags: Activist Judge, Empathy. Republicans, GOP, Judges, Law Satire, Michael Steele, Obama, Orrin Hatch, Supreme Court
Posted in Barack Obama, Constitution Humor, GOP Humor, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Michael Steele, Music Humor, Political Commentary, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Song Parodies, Supreme Court | 1 Comment »
Monday, May 11th, 2009
Dick Cheney refuses to crawl back into his undisclosed location … and Democrats rejoice:
Which Veep Talks Too Much?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Dick, thanks for talking non-stop
And for ruining the GOP’s op
To convince normal folks
That they aren’t all jokes.
Keep ensuring their “rebrand” will flop.
Tags: Cheney, Democrats, GOP, Rebranding, Republican Rebranding, Republicans Humor
Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Which Veep Talks Too Much?
Friday, May 8th, 2009
Ode To Fresh Faces
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Republican planning is plain.
They want to rebrand, they explain.
So on Sunday’s TV
New faces we’ll see:
Folks like Cheney and Newt and McCain.
Tags: Cheney, Face The Nation, Fox News Sunday, Gingrich, McCain, Media, Rebranding, Republican Rebranding, Stephanopoulos, Talk Shows, Television, TV
Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, Fox News Humor, GOP Humor, John McCain, Media Satire, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Television (TV) Satire | 5 Comments »
Wednesday, May 6th, 2009
Newsflash via a Republican video ad: Obama is endangering the U.S. by consorting with foreign leaders like Venezuela’s Hugo Chavez and Saudi King Abdullah bin Abdul Aziz.
Oooooh! Handshakes! Scary!
Quaking Over Handshakes (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
We’re endangered, the GOP says,
By a handshake with Hugo Chavez.
Seems the nation Bush left
Is wholly bereft
And too weak for some pics with the Prez.
Tags: Foreign Leaders, Hugo Chavez, King Abdullah bin Abdul Aziz, Media, National Security, Obama Bow, Obama Handshake, Photo Ops, Republican Video Ads, Republicans Humor, Saudi Arabia, Venezuela
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Political Ads, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Quaking Over Handshakes
Sunday, April 26th, 2009
On Thursday, Obama sent the filibuster-happy Republicans a message: Their zero-vote obstructionism has consequences. More specifically, Obama plans to use the budget reconciliation process to enact health care reform and student loan legislation if the GOP fails to mend its obstructionist ways.
I thought I’d celebrate Obama’s filibuster-proofing plans with a double limerick:
They Only Have Themselves To Blame
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Bipartisanship had a chance.
But the GOP zero-vote stance
Was very instructive.
Their actions obstructive
Derailed any two-party dance.
They’ve clearly expressed their intent,
So as much as they scream and they vent,
We should screw the minority.
Let the majority
Govern how money is spent.
Tags: Bipartisanship, Budget, Budget Reconciliation, Congress Humor, Filibuster, GOP, Health Care, Majority, Minority, Obstructionism, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Student Loans
Posted in Barack Obama, Congress Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, House Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Tax & Budget Humor | Comments Off on They Only Have Themselves To Blame
Ode To Senator Judd “Majority Rules, Except When It Doesn’t” Gregg
Thursday, September 3rd, 2009New Hampshire’s Senator Judd Gregg, a big “majority rules” fan back when Republicans held the majority, has suddenly become a minority rights advocate. I just can’t imagine why.
Way back when, Gregg was enthused about using filibuster-proof reconciliation rules to pass ANWR drilling legislation:
Of course now that there’s a Democratic majority, Gregg has a rather different opinion and is leading the Republican fight against passing health care reform under reconciliation rules:
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Ode To Senator Judd “Majority Rules, Except When It Doesn’t” Gregg
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Majority rule is just great,”
Said Gregg in the drilling debate.
“You’ve got 51 votes,
Then you win.” Check his quotes.
Yet 51 Dem votes don’t rate.
Related Posts: Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies
Tags: ANWR Oil Drilling, Filibusters, Health Care Reform, Health Humor, Judd Gregg, Legislation Humor, Majority Rules, Minority Rights, Republican Hypocrisy
Posted in Filibuster Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Hypocrisy Humor, Judd Gregg, Legislation Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 2 Comments »