Archive for the ‘Campaign Humor’ Category
Wednesday, February 15th, 2012
What century is this? The aggressive anti-contraception GOP stance makes me wonder whether I bought the wrong calendar.
Rick Santorum, a man who’s dangerously close to snatching the Republican presidential nomination away from Mitt Romney, apparently wants to preside over an antediluvian America: Here’s Santorum explaining why he wants to fight “the dangers of contraception:”
It’s not okay because it’s a license to do things in the sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.
And Rick is far from the only bedroom-obsessed Republican. GOP over-reach regarding contraception is approaching epic proportions:
Last week, Freshman Senator Roy Blunt (R-MO) filed legislation to allow any employer, religiously affiliated or not, to refuse to cover any essential or preventive health service, not just contraceptives, based on the “religious belief or moral conviction” of the employer. Word from DC is that Blunt and allies will attempt to add the provision as an amendment to other legislation now moving through the Senate….
The fact that American voters are overwhelmingly pro-birth control is apparently irrelevant to Republican politicians.
Perhaps a limerick might help Republican pols get the message:
Dear Bedroom-Invading Republicans (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Republican pols, please abstain
From ent’ring my bedroom domain.
And also stay out
Of my bathroom. Don’t pout!
If you’re truly “small gov,” you’ll refrain.
Tags: Birth Control Limerick, Campaign Humor, Contraception Humor, Election Humor, Employers, Feminist Limerick, Health Care, Missouri, Mitt Romney, Religion Humor, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum, Roy Blunt, Sexist Humor, Small Government
Posted in Abortion Rights, Birth Control Humor, Campaign Humor, Congress Humor, Constitution Humor, Contraception Humor, Election Satire, Feminism Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Religious Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum, Roy Blunt Humor | 3 Comments »
Monday, February 13th, 2012
Before I get to today’s Rick Santorum limerick, here’s a post from my other blog about the Mary Todd Lincoln portrait hoax.
Getting back to Santorum, Rick (not to be outdone by Ron Paul’s newsletter disclaimers) is feigning ignorance over his very own book:
Only days after having to explain a comment about women and emotions in combat, Rick Santorum seemed to struggle a bit on Sunday to explain a remark in his 2005 book “It Takes a Family” that blamed “radical feminists” for undermining families and for trying to persuade women that they could find fulfillment only in the workplace.
Asked on the ABC News program “This Week” about the book’s contentions, Mr. Santorum noted that his wife, Karen, had written that section — though only his name is on the cover and he does not list her in the acknowledgments as among those “who assisted me in the writing of this book.” …
In the interview on Sunday, Mr. Santorum pleaded unfamiliarity with the citation, saying, “I don’t know – that’s a new quote for me”…
Limerick Ode To Rick “What Book?” Santorum
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Rick, when you author a book
You have placed yourself square on the hook
For the contents inside.
You’re a coward to hide
From your screed. Either that, or a schnook.
Tags: ABC News, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Feminist Limerick, George Stephanopoulos, Karen Santorum, Political Books, Republican Cowards, Rick Santorum, THIS WEEK
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Feminism Humor, GOP Humor, Political Books, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, February 8th, 2012
Poor Karl Rove! His delicate sensibilities were offended by Clint Eastwood’s uplifting auto industry Super Bowl ad:
Over stirring French horns and stark photos of Detroit workers, the ad used the auto industry’s rebirth from bankruptcy as a symbol of American renewal and determination. But it contained some shocking language for those, like Mr. Rove, who are easily bruised:
“Detroit is showing us it can be done and what’s true about them is true about all of us. This country can’t be knocked out with one punch. We get right back up again and when we do the world’s going to hear the roar of our engines. Yeah.”
And Rove is just one among many Republicans expressing outrage over the ad narrated by Eastwood, a loyal Republican who says the ad has nothing to do with politics.
Clint Eastwood Ad Madness (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It seems Eastwood committed a sin:
His truth-telling ad brought chagrin
To the GOP crowd —
Words of hope said out loud
Are a threat — they might help our Prez win.
Tags: Advertising Humor, Auto Industry Bailout, Automobile Industry, Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Chrysler, Clint Eastwood, Detroit, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Halftime in America, Karl Rove, Marketing Humor, Patriotism Humor, Republicans Humor, Super Bowl Ad, Super Bowl Limerick
Posted in Automobiles Satire, Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Celebrity Verse, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Hollywood Humor, Karl Rove, Patriotism Poems, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 5 Comments »
Wednesday, February 8th, 2012
Pity the poor political journalist (or political satirist), who must conjure up constant commentary about a race that’s effectively over.
So it’s no wonder that the media’s in a tizzy over the Rick Santorum Sweep … even though it yielded Rick zero delegates.
Rick Gives Them Something To Talk About (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The press was beginning to mope.
But Santorum’s three wins offer hope
That the race isn’t done,
Mitt may NOT be the one.
But does Rick stand a chance? Answer: Nope!
Tags: Campaign Humor, Colorado, Election Satire, Journalism, Media Humor, Minnesota, Missouri, Mitt Romney, Republican Primary, Rick Santorum
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum | Comments Off on Rick Gives Them Something To Talk About (Limerick)
Monday, February 6th, 2012
This headline is funny, but not surprising: Donald Trump Takes Credit For Mitt Romney’s Big Win In Nevada:
“There was a lot riding on that particular race in Nevada and it was interesting, because the numbers were much, much greater than you thought,” Trump gloated. “And a lot of people are giving me credit for that. And I will accept that credit.”
Here’s the limerick that Romney staffers talked Mitt out of sending:
The Limerick Romney Wanted To Send Trump
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Donald, big thanks for your backing,
But I fear that your modesty’s lacking.
My win in Nevada
Was ME. You did NADA!
I regret I did not send you packing.
Tags: Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, Endorsements Humor, Mitt Romney, Nevada
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Nevada Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 3 Comments »
Friday, February 3rd, 2012
I’ve finally figured out how Newt plans to populate the moon: He’ll catapult the poor onto the moon via trampolines.
Yes, I know that sounds crazy. But I can’t think of any other explanation for this nutty Newt quote:
I really believe that we should care about the very poor, unlike Governor Romney. But I believe we should care very differently from Barack Obama….What the poor need is a trampoline so they can spring up, so I am for replacing the safety net with a trampoline.
Limerick Ode To Newt Lunacy
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The safety net’s bad, prattles Newt,
Suggesting we give it the boot.
From his odd bag of tricks,
Newt throws this in the mix:
Trampolines — out-of-poverty route.
Tags: Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Fiscal Humor, Mitt Romney, Moon Colony, Newt Gingrich, Poverty, Safety Net, Space Humor, Trampoline Limerick
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Space Exploration, Tax & Budget Humor | 3 Comments »
Friday, February 3rd, 2012
There’s been lots of talk about this Mitt Romney gaffe: “I’m not concerned about the very poor. We have a safety net there. If it needs repair, I’ll fix it.”
But as Ezra Klein points out, the problem with Mitt Romney isn’t his gaffes, it’s his policies, which would dig a deep hole in that safety net.
Keep The Safety Net Safe From Mitt Romney (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Find some holes in the safety net? “Fix it!”
That’s how hypocrite Romney depicts it.
But we’re onto Mitt’s game
And his policy aim:
What his policies do is deep-six it.
Tags: Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Federal Budget, Mitt Romney, Poverty, Safety Net, Tax Cuts
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 2 Comments »
Thursday, February 2nd, 2012
Will Trump endorse Newt? Will The Donald go with Mitt? Will Donald Trump fire himself from The Apprentice so he can run for president as a third-party candidate?
At long last, all that heady speculation has ended.
Trump Endorses Romney – Election Over (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Donald Trump had been sending up flares.
His endorsement speech finally airs:
Despite all that’s been writ,
He is going with Mitt.
I have only one question: Who cares?
Tags: Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, Endorsements Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Trump Endorses Romney — Election Over (Limerick)
Monday, January 30th, 2012
I never thought I’d say this, but please listen to Sarah Palin:
Sarah Palin still hasn’t officially endorsed Newt Gingrich, but she’s making it increasingly clear that she’s pulling for the former House speaker to continue to cause headaches for Mitt Romney.
Her latest bumper-sticker-ready pitch to Republican voters: “Vote for Newt, annoy a liberal.”
Listen To Palin and Annoy Me, Please! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Annoy Lib’rals, vote Newt — that’s the pitch
That Palin is spouting. How rich!
We’d delight in a Newt
V. Barack race, and root
For Mitt Romney to suffer that glitch.
Tags: Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Liberals, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Sarah Palin, Voting Limerick
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Sarah Palin, Voting Satire | 3 Comments »
Monday, January 30th, 2012
Some Republicans are worried they’ll be saddled with a brokered convention. And Newt Gingrich’s statement is upping their anxiety:
With just one full day of campaigning left until the Florida primary and polls indicating that Mitt Romney has substantially widened his lead in the Sunshine State, Newt Gingrich told reporters Sunday he is prepared to fight out the Republican presidential nomination all the way to a brokered convention.
“We have no evidence yet that Romney anywhere is coming close to getting a majority and I think when you take all the non-Romney votes, it’s very likely that at the convention there will be a non-Romney majority and maybe a very substantial one. My job is to convert that into a Gingrich majority,” Gingrich said.
Brokered Convention Blues (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The thought of a brokered convention
Is creating Republican tension:
Will Mitt’s delegate count
Sufficiently mount
If Newt nixes a prez run suspension?
Tags: Brokered Convention, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Presidential Campaign, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 5 Comments »
Thursday, January 26th, 2012
With the powers-that-be on the right hitting Gingrich hard, he’s surely in the market for endorsements. But I suspect Newt could do without imprisoned, former Rep. Randy “Duke” Cunningham’s stamp of approval:
Cunningham tells Gingrich in an electronic message he says he sent to the candidate last month that his fellow prisoners, and their families, support Gingrich:
“Newt, a voice out of the past. Down but not out and still fighting. First I do not want anything from you but have been watching the debates. I have 80% of inmates that would vote for you. They might not be able to but their extended families will.”
Newt’s Endorsement Blues (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Newt Gingrich, endorsed by a Duke:
From Duke Cunningham — praise not rebuke.
The imprisoned ex-Rep
Endorsed Newt with great pep—
One old colleague Newt doesn’t make puke!
Tags: Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Endorsements Humor, Newt Gingrich, Randy Duke Cunningham
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 2 Comments »
Thursday, January 26th, 2012
I can’t decide whether naming Santorum’s fund-raising appeal Conservatives United Moneybomb is stupid … or brilliant. Either way, it’s bringing in a scary amount of money.
Rick Santorum’s Acronym Antics (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Choosing acronyms tends to be tricky,
And it’s wise to be cautious and picky.
But Rick’s fundraising C.U.M.
Has raised a huge sum!
Rick Santorum, on Google, still icky!
Tags: Campaign Humor, Conservatives United Moneybomb, CUM, Election Satire, Fund Raising, Rick Santorum
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Santorum | Comments Off on Rick Santorum’s Acronym Antics (Limerick)
Wednesday, January 25th, 2012
According to Newt Gingrich, his serial wife-cheating makes him “normal,” better able to relate to the problems of average people, and more electable. You’ve got to give that fellow Brownie-points for creativity. Who else could turn multiple affairs into a plus?
In an interview with the Christian Broadcasting Network this afternoon, Newt Gingrich picked up Rick Perry’s torch in the so-called “war on religion,” promising that he would fight back against judges who are “trying to drive God out of life.” The thrice-married Speaker then defended his personal marital history, claiming his multiple affairs “make me more normal than somebody who wanders around seeming perfect” because he can understand “the human condition and challenges of life for normal people.”
Limerick Ode To “Normal” Newt Gingrich
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My affairs make me “normal,” says Newt.
As defenses go, Newt’s is a beaut:
Seems perfection is bad,
And unless you’re a cad,
Your empathy skills are minute.
Tags: Affairs, Campaign Satire, CBN, Christian Broadcasting Network, Electability, Election Humor, Empathy, God, Infidelity, Newt Gingrich, Religion Humor, Speaker
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Excuses Satire, Family Values Humor, GOP Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Religious Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To “Normal” Newt Gingrich
Tuesday, January 24th, 2012
Newt Gingrich seemed way off his game at last night’s Florida debate. And at first, I attributed this to Mitt Romney’s new, improved debating style.
But Newt apparently needs the adrenalin rush that comes with cheers and applause. And last night’s NBC debate rules precluded such a rush: Audience feedback was limited, in the interest of using the time for actual debating.
So now Newt (always on the outlook for another excuse to bash the media) is petulantly threatening to boycott any debate that limits the audience’s free speech:
Mr. Gingrich’s performance in the debate in Tampa on Monday night was far more muted. Critics noted that he seemed to be off his game. The National Journal, which co-hosted the NBC debate, compared Gingrich to “a stand-up comedian whose routine suffers without echoes of laughter egging him on.”
Mr. Gingrich clearly noticed something was off, too. “We’re going to serve notice on future debates,” he told Fox. “We’re just not going to allow that to happen. That’s wrong. The media doesn’t control free speech. People ought to be allowed to applaud if they want to.”
Hmmm…., I wonder how Newt feels about boos.
Limerick Ode To Newt’s Latest Temper Tantrum
By Madeleine Begun Kane
No cheering at last night’s debate!
This has Gingrich quite peeved and irate.
He says cheers from the crowd
Simply must be allowed.
Without cheers, will Newt Gingrich deflate?
Tags: Campaign Humor, Debate Limerick, Election Humor, First Amendment, Florida, Free Speech, Media Bashing, Media Humor, Mitt Romney, NBC, Newt Gingrich
Posted in Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 9 Comments »
Monday, January 23rd, 2012
Newt Gingrich demolished Mitt in South Carolina. Newt’s surging in Florida. And Romney’s large national lead is collapsing. Needless to say, the Republican establishment is starting to panic:
To the extent Newt threatens the Establishment, it’s because of his electability–or lack thereof. The GOP’s mandarins see Gingrich’s nomination as a sure way to blow their chance of deposing Barack Obama. They see Gingrich as the political equivalent of a Fukushima nuclear plant worker, with polls showing him to be lethally irradiated by his negative approval ratings. Whereas Mitt Romney is running about even with Barack Obama in head-to-head polling, Newt loses by double-digit margins. Sure, those numbers could change if Gingrich beats Romney and wins the nomination, with all the accolades it entails. On the other hand, his grandiosity syndrome may kick in, as it has before, and render him a laughing stock. Hence the many Establishment Republicans now saying things like, “Newt means losing 45 states.”
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Limerick Ode To Republican Panic
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Republican powers-that-be
Are scared of a Newt-nominee:
Newt’s grandiose ways
Could trigger malaise,
As voters to Democrats flee.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Florida, GOP, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Political Polls, Republicans Humor, RNC, South Carolina, Voting Limerick
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Polls, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor, Voting Satire | 6 Comments »
Friday, January 20th, 2012
The South Carolina primary is tomorrow, and Newt Gingrich’s poll numbers are picking up steam.
Mitt Romney’s South Carolina Blues (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It appears that Newt Gingrich may win
Tomorrow, to Romney’s chagrin.
Just imagine the gloating
Right after the voting!
If this happens, will Mitt take to gin?
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Political Polls, Presidential Campaign Humor, Republican Primary, South Carolina
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, South Carolina Humor | 8 Comments »
Thursday, January 19th, 2012
In case you’re asking
why Rick Perry has dropped out:
Donors talked Turkey.
*****
My head is spinning
from Republican debates.
I’m begging — please stop!
*****
View pols with caution.
Review records and viewpoints.
Behold all the lies.
*****
Brilliance from pols?
No reason to expect it.
Saneness would be nice.
*****
Tags: Campaign Funds, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Fund Raising, Political Haiku & Senryu, Politicians, Republican Debates, Rick Perry, Turkey
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, January 18th, 2012
You’ve probably heard that Rick Perry’s idiotic debate remarks, claiming Turkey is run by Islamic terrorists, led to a diplomatic incident. But did you know it inspired George W. Bush to send Rick Perry this limerick?
Limerick Letter From George W. Bush To Rick Perry
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Rick, I’ve been meaning to write,
Cuz I watch you debate with delight.
And your Turkey faux pas:
What a laugh — Ha! Ha! Ha!
Thanks for making me look really bright!
Tags: Campaign Satire, Debate Limerick, Diplomatic Incidents, Election Humor, Foreign Relations, George W. Bush, Presidential Debate, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, State Department, Turkey
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry | Comments Off on Limerick Letter From George W. Bush To Rick Perry
Friday, January 13th, 2012
Mitt Romney is fluent in French. Finally, something to like about him!
But not so fast! According to a Newt Gingrich ad, French fluency’s a non-non:
Limerick Ode To Newt “J’accuse” Gingrich
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Here’s a message from Newt’s latest ad:
Mitt Romney speaks French and that’s bad.
What an odd thing to knock:
Mitt sounds like a Jacques,
And bilingual is suspect. How sad!
Oddly enough, there’s ample evidence that Newt Gingrich pouvait comprendre cette phrase.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Foreign Languages, French Fluency, Mitt Romney, Newt Gingrich, Political Ads
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Language Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Ads, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Newt “J’accuse” Gingrich
Wednesday, January 11th, 2012
According to Mitt Romney, people who challenge Wall Street and economic unfairness are driven by “envy.”
Limerick Ode To Mitt “They’re All Just Jealous” Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Distribution of wealth on your mind?
Take exception to it and you’ll find
That according to Mitt
You’re an envious twit.
To inequities, Romney is blind.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Class Envy, Class Warfare, Distribution Of Wealth, Election Humor, Envy Humor, Financial Inequity, Income Tax, Jealousy Humor, Mitt Romney, Wall Street
Posted in Campaign Humor, Economy Humor, Election Satire, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor | 2 Comments »
