Posts Tagged ‘Detroit’

Romney’s Lies Are Jeep (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 30th, 2012

Mitt Romney keeps repeating a claim that he knows to be false: Both in speeches and ads, he asserts that Chrysler’s moving all Jeep production to China. In truth, Chrysler’s adding 2200 Jeep employees in Toledo, Ohio and Detroit, Michigan.

But what’s a little thing like the truth, when you’re trying to deceive your way into the White House?

Romney’s Lies Are Jeep (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Romney’s China-Jeep ad is a lie.
Yet he keeps doubling down on it. Why?
Cuz he’s paid little price
For his lies. That device
Gets him votes. Bid democracy “Bye!”

Mitt Romney’s Taxing Crowd Numbers (Limerick)

Friday, February 24th, 2012

Imagine giving a speech in a stadium meant to hold 65,000 people. Now imagine only 1,200 people showing up.

If you want to see what that looks like, check out this photo of Mitt Romney’s speech in Detroit’s Ford Stadium.

Mitt Romney is holding an event at Ford Stadium which has failed to attract enough people to come even close to filling it up (in fact, you could fit Romney’s 1,200 person crowd in the 65,000-seat stadium 54 times over).

Mitt Romney’s Taxing Crowd Numbers (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Just twelve-hundred folks in a place
Meant for sixty-five-thousand. Bare space!
That’s Mitt in Detroit:
Romney’s team ain’t adroit,
And poor Mitt has a very small base.

Clint Eastwood Ad Flap Madness (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 8th, 2012

Poor Karl Rove! His delicate sensibilities were offended by Clint Eastwood’s uplifting auto industry Super Bowl ad:

Over stirring French horns and stark photos of Detroit workers, the ad used the auto industry’s rebirth from bankruptcy as a symbol of American renewal and determination. But it contained some shocking language for those, like Mr. Rove, who are easily bruised:

“Detroit is showing us it can be done and what’s true about them is true about all of us. This country can’t be knocked out with one punch. We get right back up again and when we do the world’s going to hear the roar of our engines. Yeah.”

And Rove is just one among many Republicans expressing outrage over the ad narrated by Eastwood, a loyal Republican who says the ad has nothing to do with politics.

Clint Eastwood Ad Madness (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

It seems Eastwood committed a sin:
His truth-telling ad brought chagrin
To the GOP crowd —
Words of hope said out loud
Are a threat — they might help our Prez win.

Revisionist History On Auto Pilot

Wednesday, May 25th, 2011

Remember when Republicans opposed the automobile industry bailout, slamming Obama for his “government takeover?”

Now that Obama’s auto industry rescue plan is a raging success, Republicans have acknowledged their error and congratulated Obama on a job well done, right?

Hahahahaha!

So can we trust the media to make sure Republicans like Romney, Corker, Pawlenty, Kasich, and their ilk don’t scam people into thinking the bailout was their idea?

You’re kidding, right?

Revisionist History On Auto Pilot
By Madeleine Begun Kane

So what did Republicans say
To auto co bailouts? No way!
But the past they would edit
And try to take credit:
It worked, so that plan was “their” play.

Shameless Republicans On Christmas Attack

Wednesday, December 30th, 2009

Republicans have been treating Nigerian Abdulmutallab’s failed Christmas Day bombing of Flight 253 like a Christmas gift from Al Qaeda — something really juicy to exploit.

In fact, the Republicans’ partisan response to this attempted terrorism has been so shameless, even Politico noticed.

Republicans like Pete Hoekstra, James DeMint, Dan Burton, and many others have earned themselves a triple limerick by playing politics with national security:

Shameless Republicans On Christmas Attack
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Exploiting a terror attempt
Is surely beneath all contempt.
But that never would stop
Such a GOP op:
“Bash Obama! He failed to preempt.”

There is plenty of blame they should share
For that terrorist scare in the air.
We’ve no TSA head:
DeMint “held” him instead
Of a vote. It’s Republican guerre.

As for funding our air travel screening,
They vote no. Seems they’re pro-terror leaning.
Though their record is poor,
They keep spouting full-bore.
Please Republicans, spare us your preening.

NOTE: Here’s some unrelated, but timely, New Years Resolutions humor: It Is Hereby Resolved.