Posts Tagged ‘Presidential Campaign’

Open Limerick To Emily Murphy

Thursday, November 19th, 2020

Headline: “The self-inflicted agony of Emily Murphy”

Dear woman who runs GSA:
You are under great stress, so you say.
Your pressure is huge?
You deserve it, you STOOGE!
You’re the cause of this mass disarray.

Limerick Ode To An Endless Republican Primary

Thursday, March 8th, 2012

Rick Santorum’s campaign is stunningly inept in its failure to qualify for sundry ballots.

Yes, I know that Santorum’s campaign is woefully under-funded. And that he never expected to get this far. But at some point, I can’t help wondering whether Santorum is using the faith-based method of ballot qualification.

Of course all this begs the question: Why the heck can’t Mitt Romney finish him off?

Limerick Ode To An Endless Republican Primary
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Rick Santorum’s campaign is inept,
Under-funded, abysmally prepped.
Yet the contest is split:
Hairline wins made by Mitt
Where the Gov should have easily swept.

Brokered Convention Blues (Limerick)

Monday, January 30th, 2012

Some Republicans are worried they’ll be saddled with a brokered convention. And Newt Gingrich’s statement is upping their anxiety:

With just one full day of campaigning left until the Florida primary and polls indicating that Mitt Romney has substantially widened his lead in the Sunshine State, Newt Gingrich told reporters Sunday he is prepared to fight out the Republican presidential nomination all the way to a brokered convention.

“We have no evidence yet that Romney anywhere is coming close to getting a majority and I think when you take all the non-Romney votes, it’s very likely that at the convention there will be a non-Romney majority and maybe a very substantial one. My job is to convert that into a Gingrich majority,” Gingrich said.

Brokered Convention Blues (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The thought of a brokered convention
Is creating Republican tension:
Will Mitt’s delegate count
Sufficiently mount
If Newt nixes a prez run suspension?

Open Limerick To President Obama

Wednesday, August 31st, 2011

Rumor has it that Obama is belatedly concerned about his base:

Open Limerick To President Obama
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Obama, how nice that you’ve noted
Your “base” is now far less devoted.
You took us for granted—
No longer enchanted!
In our hearts and our minds you’re demoted.

Donald’s Trumped Up Campaign

Monday, May 16th, 2011

Surprise, surprise — Donald Trump has announced he isn’t running for president. Of course there’s no way Donald Trump was ever going to seek the presidency — the man’s a self-described germaphobe.

Donald’s Trumped Up Campaign
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Were you hoping for President Trump?
There’s a hurdle he simply can’t jump:
The hand-shaking mob —
On the stump, that’s his job.
And a hand is a germ-laden sump.

(More Donald Trump humor here.)

McCain And Palin Make Rudy Look Like A Class Act

Tuesday, October 7th, 2008

It’s not easy to make Rudy Giuliani look like a class act. But both McCain and Palin have managed to do it quite handily.   While Rudy (on at least one occasion) had the decency to chide an audience member for connecting Democrats with terrorists, McCain and Palin apparently feel no such compunction. Why do I say that? Because they greet   anti-Obama audience-shouts like “Treason,”  “Terrorist!” and “Kill!” with silence.

McCain And Palin Make Rudy Look Like A Class Act
By Madeleine Begun Kane

John McCain, I sure hope that you’re proud:
You and Palin prompt rage in a crowd.
Your supporters shout swill:
“Treason!”  “Terrorist!” “Kill!”
Even Rudy would say: Not allowed!

Ode To Attack Dog Palin

Tuesday, October 7th, 2008

Ode To Attack Dog Palin (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Palin proudly proclaims “I don’t blink!”
(Doesn’t count when it’s merely a wink.)
She attacks with a smile,
Throwing lies cross the aisle —
Slimes Barack as a terrorist fink.

A Do-Over Supreme Court Test For Palin?

Thursday, October 2nd, 2008

According to Fred Thompson, Sarah Palin’s inability to name a single Supreme Court case she disagrees with wasn’t her fault.  Why not?  Because Katie Couric didn’t give her a list of cases.    I half-expected Thompson to demand  a do-over test.

A Do-Over Supreme Court Test For Palin?
By Madeleine Begun Kane

You’re excused, dear Ms. Palin. Rejoice!
Now that Thompson has lent you his voice,
The court case-test you flunked
Has been strongly debunked
As unfair — wasn’t  multiple choice.