Archive for the ‘Republicans Humor’ Category

Sasse’s Trump Critique Lacks Freshness (Limerick)

Monday, September 3rd, 2018

Headline: “Republican senator slams Trump’s DOJ attack: US ‘not some banana republic'”

Dear Senator Sasse, words are cheap.
Without action, you’re naught but a creep
Who seeks credit for drivel.
Don’t shirk! Do not shrivel.
Be statesmanlike! Act! Take the leap!

Trump-Tweet Billboard Trolls Ted’s Campaign (Limerick)

Monday, September 3rd, 2018

Headline: “Activists to remind Texas about Trump’s ‘Lyin’ Ted’ Cruz tweets with mobile billboard”

The Donald’s campaigning for Cruz.
I’m amused (aren’t you?) by this news:
A huge sign filled with tweets–
Donald’s anti-Cruz bleats–
Will be giving both scoundrels the blues.

Donald’s Bad For Our Health (Limerick)

Sunday, September 2nd, 2018

Donald Trump and his pals make me roil.
They have soiled us and make my blood boil.
How I pray we soon foil them;
In prison embroil them.
In the meantime, o’er lim’ricks I’ll toil.

Does Trump Despise His Own Supporters? (Limerick)

Thursday, August 30th, 2018

Headline: “Trump Secretly Despises His Own Supporters”

Donald Trump shows contempt and disdain
For Jeff Sessions; he’ll often complain
That Jeff’s accent and schools
Are both southern. Trump-tools
Are undoubtedly viewed in that vein.

The Conspiracy Theorist-in-Chief Strikes Again (Limerick)

Tuesday, August 28th, 2018

Trump’s latest conspiracy theory
(And they all make me terribly weary)
Is that Google is biased;
Bad press appears highest!
Poor Trump — fact-based news makes him teary.

Dishonorable Donald (Limericks)

Monday, August 27th, 2018

I rarely agreed with McCain,
And his votes gave me cause to complain.
But Trump NEVER was fit
To clean John McCain’s shit,
So how DARE he treat John with disdain!

**********

I never supported McCain.
My vote McCain never did gain.
But compared to the rest
Of his party, with zest
(Even dead) my support he’d attain.

Resign Already! (Limerick)

Friday, August 24th, 2018

Hey Donald, it’s time to show spine.
Save your nation and fam’ly — resign!
You destroy and debase;
You’re an Oval disgrace.
While you’re at it, take Pence, your Veep-swine.

Hatch Still Hitched To Trump (Limerick)

Friday, August 24th, 2018

Hatch after Cohen plea deal: ‘I think Trump is a much better person today than he was then.’

Orrin Hatch seems a dignified chap,
But he’s really a Party-first sap.
His virtue is feigned,
His deceit unrestrained.
A Trump lapdog, the man’s full of crap.

The “What’s The Big Deal?” Defense (Limerick)

Wednesday, August 22nd, 2018

Trump’s personal lawyer’s confessed
To committing at Donald’s behest
And direction some crimes,
While his party-mate slimes
Are pretending to be unimpressed.

Trump’s Really Really Extra Bad Day (Limerick)

Tuesday, August 21st, 2018

“Guilty” Manafort ain’t going free,
And Cohen has taken a plea.
So brace for more tweets
Packed with self-serving bleats;
Whiny Trump can’t let anything be.

Rudy’s Nuts and That’s The “Truth”

Sunday, August 19th, 2018

Rudy Giuliani to Chuck Todd: “Truth isn’t truth.”

Says Rudy, truth doesn’t exist.
(That lesson in law school I missed.)
Seems reality’s dire
Cuz Trump is a liar,
And the truth can no longer assist.

Gangster Trump Calls John Dean A “RAT” (Limerick)

Sunday, August 19th, 2018

Donald Trump describes Dean as a “RAT.”
How revealing an attitude’s that!
John Dean helped expose
White House crimes, but Trump chose
Gangster slang — law and order my hat!

McGahn’s The Man (Limerick)

Saturday, August 18th, 2018

Headline: “White House Counsel Has Cooperated Extensively With Mueller’s Obstruction Inquiry”

When the Russia probe shit hits the fan,
The fallout won’t land on McGahn.
No he won’t take the fall;
He’s been giving his all
To assisting Bob Mueller. Smart man!

Just Call Donald “His Highness” (Limerick)

Saturday, August 18th, 2018

Headline: “Brennan Says Trump Is ‘Drunk on Power’”

Donald Trump wants his critics to cower,
So he punishes them with a glower.
Since his only concern
Is himself, he will spurn
All restraint, for he’s dead drunk on power.

Trump Won’t Get To Reign In His Parade (Limerick)

Friday, August 17th, 2018

No parade for the Donald! How SAD!
And needless to say, the man’s mad;
He’d looked forward to riding
A tank and presiding
In autocrat fashion … like Vlad.

Trump Can’t Escape Tapes (Limerick)

Monday, August 13th, 2018

Trump made FALSE claims of taping, with drama,
Feigning grievance from fake spy-claim trauma.
But he’s now in bad shape
Cuz his CRONIES have tape.
Seems the only NON-taper’s Obama.

Limerick Ode To Omarosa

Friday, August 10th, 2018

Omarosa, I’d love to believe
All your claims about Trump, but I grieve,
Cuz as much as they sound
Like the Donald, I’m bound
To discount them; like Trump, you deceive.

Trump’s Migrating Standards (Limerick)

Thursday, August 9th, 2018

Headline: “Melania Trump’s Parents Become U.S. Citizens, Using ‘Chain Migration’ Trump Hates”

The Donald condemns “chain migration”
To enthused and extended ovation.
Yet his wife seems quite pleased
To exploit it. It eased
Her mom and dad’s path to our nation.

Trump Puts Press At Risk (Limerick)

Thursday, August 9th, 2018

Headline: “Media boost security as Trump ramps up ‘enemy’ rhetoric”

When the media covers Trump rallies,
It’s as risky as ent’ring dark allies.
Donald’s shown us his cards,
So the press now needs guards
Due to menacing crowds and threat tallies.

The GOP’s “Blue Wave” Blues (Limerick)

Thursday, August 9th, 2018

Headline: “4 signs of a blue wave from Election Day: Republicans should be running scared”

Most Republican leaders see Trump
As creating a GOP slump.
But not Donald! He’ll brag
And pretend the “Trump drag”
Is “fake news,” as our “blue wave” odds jump.