Posts Tagged ‘Computer Humor’

Fickle Limerick

Thursday, September 29th, 2011

Fickle Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A popular gal who was fickle
Found herself in a terrible pickle:
A fellow she spurned
Launched a web site that turned
Her long wooers-list into a trickle.

A Limerick Ode To My Husband Mark Kane

Thursday, July 14th, 2011

A Limerick Ode To My Husband Mark Kane
By Madeleine Begun Kane

You’re in Facebook at last — Hip Hooray!
Till this morning, you kept saying “Nay!”
The reason is clear
Why you’re finally here:
I’ve joined Google-Plus as of today!

Digital Impasse

Thursday, April 21st, 2011

Digital Impasse
By Madeleine Begun Kane

My brain is packed with secret codes
To access all my stuff,
Like bank accounts and sundry cards.
Recalling them is rough.

I pay my bills online and need
A PIN for each of those.
My website has a password too,
Protecting verse and prose.

These letters, numbers, symbols mix
In ways to stave off theft.
We’re warned to make them quite complex,
Defeating hackers deft.

We’re also cautioned, “Vary them.
Don’t make your codes the same.
A thief gets hold of only one —
You’re screwed and you’re to blame.”

So ciphers clutter up my mind.
I dare not write them down.
With paper bearing secrets dear,
A thief could go to town.

I’m forced to hide them in my brain —
A codified morass,
Despite my fear that one day soon
They’ll flee my mind en masse.

(Prompted by secrets at Poets United.)

Creative Keys

Tuesday, April 19th, 2011

Creative Keys (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When you’re whipping your verse into shape
And are caught in a verse-challenged scrape,
The delete key is handy.
Assisted by brandy,
And last, but not least, try escape.

(Prompted to escape)

Ode To AWOL Faces On Facebook

Thursday, December 9th, 2010

When Facebook makes changes, they usually annoy me. But I must admit that I mostly like Facebook’s new format and profiles, now that I’m getting used to them.

However, I do have one limerick-worthy peeve which you may have experienced — the now-you-see-it-now-you-don’t line of five photos that (sometimes) sits near the top of our pages.

So I bring you my Ode to AWOL Faces on Facebook:

Ode To AWOL Faces On Facebook
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Sometimes lines of five photos appear
Near the top. Then they vanish. Oh, dear!
Facebook’s done it again.
I will have to try Zen
To cope with this format’s premiere.

Fight Firewalls With Kindle

Saturday, January 30th, 2010

My humorist pal Rose Valenta recently created a Kindle version of her blog and inspired me to do the same. Why? Because many employers are getting strict about web access, blocking employees from reading their favorite blogs and sites — even while they’re on a break or at lunch.

But your boss can’t control what you read on your Kindle. And Amazon makes it easy for bloggers to create Kindle blog editions, allowing fans to bypass their bosses and keep up with their reading.

That brings me to my latest limerick:

Fight Firewalls With Kindle
By Madeleine Begun Kane

You’re at work, but on break — want to read.
But your boss did a dastardly deed:
Your fav’rites are blocked.
Your net access is locked.
But he can’t stop a Kindle blog feed.

My News: I’ve created Kindle versions of both my blogs. So if you’d like to read this general humor blog on your Kindle reader you can subscribe right here. And if you’d like to read my other political satire blog on your Kindle device, you can subscribe right here.

Attention Fellow Bloggers: If you’d like to publish your own blog on Amazon Kindle, Amazon makes it pretty easy and has a helpful Kindle Blog FAQ here. You can also find some useful info over at Mashable and some Kindle badges and icons here.

Warning: Reading blogs on Kindle isn’t free, except for the 14-day free trial for each blog. Monthly Kindle blog subscription fees are controlled by Amazon and priced at either $0.99 per month or $1.99 per month. Moreover, only 30% of the revenue goes to the blogger.

And Now For The Sales Pitch: Each of my two blogs is priced at $0.99 per month.

So if you’re a Kindle owner, I hope you’ll give the Kindle version of this humor blog and/or the Kindle version of my political satire blog a try.

Is Google At War?

Wednesday, October 24th, 2007

Many prestigious and popular sites just took a huge Google PageRank hit. For instance,  The Washington Post, Forbes, The Chicago Sun-Times, and SFGate.com have all dropped from a 7 to a 5.

Search engine experts and webmasters are speculating that Google is punishing these and numerous other sites because of their advertising practices.  And that brings me to my latest haiku:

Is Google at war,
Smiting ad revenue streams
That bypass Google?

(You can find more of my technology, computer, and search engine humor here and my news haiku here.)

Ode To The Segway Scooter

Friday, September 15th, 2006

How’s this for a corporate nightmare? Every Segway Personal Transporter ever manufactured has been recalled due to a “software glitch in the scooters that can make riders fall.”

This recall calls out for a limerick, don’t you think? So here’s my Ode To The Segway Scooter:

The maker of scooters called Segway
Has recalled them from road, walk, and hedgeway.
Their software’s quite galling.
It’s prone to cause falling.
Now lawyers have fresh “we allege” prey.

Bloggers’ Rhapsody (Can Be Sung To Gershwin’s “Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off”)

Tuesday, August 8th, 2006

You praise my weblog
And I’ll mention your blog.
You link my weblog
And I’ll link to your blog
Weblog,
Your blog,
Weblog,
Your blog,
Let’s call the whole thing off.

You laud my rampage
On Bush’s last outrage.
You say I’m so sage,
Go check out my web page. …

(Bloggers’ Rhapsody is continued here.)

A Traveler’s Net Woes

Tuesday, August 8th, 2006

If your husband ever invites you to join him on a business trip, be sure to ask him these questions:
   1. Will you ever get to see him while he is not — technically — asleep?
   2. What will he do, if you accidentally lock yourself out of your hotel room in the middle of the night while you are not — technically — dressed?

Unfortunately, I didn’t think to ask these questions when my husband Mark invited me to join him for a six-week Boston business trip. So I had to learn the answers the hard way. …

( A Traveler’s Net Woes is continued here.)