Posts Tagged ‘Republicans Humor’
Monday, July 27th, 2015
The guys (and one gal) vying for the Republican presidential nomination are in a bind. With Donald Trump in the picture, it’s virtually impossible to get press coverage and boost poll numbers, even if you say something crazy. But I do have a “modest proposal” for them:
Debate Spot “Strategery” (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Many would-be debaters are freaking
Cuz that spot on the stage that they’re seeking
Is elusive at best;
They’ve been Trumped by a pest.
Here’s a tip for attention: Try streaking.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Donald Trump, Election Humor, GOP Humor, GOP Lies, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on Debate Spot “Strategery” (Limerick)
Tuesday, July 21st, 2015
Not that I’m a fan of Sen. Lindsey Graham, but Trump’s giving Graham’s private cell phone number out to the public is disgusting! I wish someone would do the same with Trump’s number, giving him a taste of his own caddish medicine.
And please don’t tell me two wrongs don’t make a right. Donald Trump deserves that and much more … including this limerick:
Lindsey Graham must buy a new cell;
He’s been doxed into mean-caller hell
By the Donald, who thinks
All opponents are finks,
Deserving a Trump “diss and tell.”
Tags: Campaign Satire, Cell Phones, Donald Trump, Election Humor, Invasion of Privacy, Lindsey Graham, Privacy Humor, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Lindsey Graham, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Privacy Humor, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Too Bad The Donald Can’t Be Docked For Doxing (Limerick)
Tuesday, July 21st, 2015
Help! I Can’t Stop Writing Trump Limericks!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The race has been thrown out of kilter
By Trump, who is lacking a filter.
I have three more lines left,
But I’m sadly bereft
Because “builder,” alas, ain’t spelled “builter.”
Tags: Campaign Satire, Donald Trump, Election Humor, GOP Humor, GOP Lies, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Help! I Can’t Stop Writing Trump Limericks!
Wednesday, July 15th, 2015
Republican Just Deserts (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Republican pols are distraught
Cuz their base supports “Trumpian Thought.”
But their years of supporting
Ill will and distorting
The truth gave them just what they wrought.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Donald Trump, Election Humor, GOP Humor, GOP Lies, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Republican Just Deserts (Limerick)
Wednesday, July 15th, 2015
“Lame” Critiques (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
So minimum wage laws are “lame?”
Sounds inane, but it’s Scott Walker’s claim.
What is “lame” is that Scott
Uses words without thought–
Schoolyard slams without substance. For shame!
Tags: Campaign Satire, Economy Satire, Election Humor, GOP Idiocy, Minimum Wage, Money Poetry, Presidential Election, Republican Primary, Republicans Humor, Scott Walker, Wisconsin, Work Humor, Workplace
Posted in Business Humor, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Employment Humor, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Scott Walker, White House, Wisconsin | Comments Off on “Lame” Critiques (Limerick)
Tuesday, June 30th, 2015
Open Limerick To Chris Christie
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Christie, you claim that you’re running.
If you are, then your chutzpah is stunning,
Cuz you surely know well
That you’ve no chance in hell.
Cunning prank perhaps? ’Fess up: You’re funning!
Tags: Campaign Satire, Chris Christie, Election Humor, GOP Humor, New Jersey, Republicans Humor, White House
Posted in Campaign Humor, Chris Christie, Election Satire, GOP Humor, New Jersey Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Open Limerick To Chris Christie
Wednesday, June 17th, 2015
Trumped Up Candidate (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Says Trump, “I shall build a great wall.
I’m the greatest wall-builder of all!
I’ll make Mexico pay
To construct it — Olé!”
There’s no tale that’s too tall for Trump’s gall.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Donald Trump, Drug War, Election Humor, Financial Disclosure, GOP Idiocy, Mexico Humor, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Mexico Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Trumped Up Candidate (Limerick)
Tuesday, June 16th, 2015
Don’t Fall For Trump’s Trompe-L’œil
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Trump, you’ve announced that you’ll run.
But I know it’s a stunt, and you’ll shun
That financial report.
When it’s due, you’ll abort…
After relishing limelight-filled fun.
NOTE: A presidential candidate can, in theory, “run” for four months without filing his personal financial disclosure with the FEC … and then abandon the campaign. And I’m betting Trump will do exactly that.
Why? Cuz Trump can BS all he wants to on his two-page unsworn-to summary of assets. But the actual legal filing has to be accurate. And I’m guessing that an accurate filing wouldn’t be nearly as impressive as Trump’s “asset summary.”
The Washington Post explains the personal financial reporting requirements for a presidential candidate:
…under a 1978 federal ethics law, presidential candidates must file a personal financial disclosure with the FEC within 30 days after announcing their candidacies. (They can request two 45-day extensions.) The filing must detail their financial interests and income, as well as those of their spouses and dependent children.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Donald Trump, Election Humor, FEC, Financial Disclosure, GOP Idiocy, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, FEC Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Don’t Fall For Trump’s Trompe-L’œil
Friday, June 12th, 2015
The Iowa GOP Board
Found its straw poll was being ignored
And disdained — even mocked.
So I sure wasn’t shocked
By its vote to at last cut the cord.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, GOP Humor, Iowa, Presidential Campaign Humor, Republicans Humor, Straw Poll
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Iowa Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on No More Grasping At Straws (Limerick)
Saturday, June 6th, 2015
An Open Limerick To Donald Trump
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Donald, I’m begging you: Run!
Join the “clown car” and add to the fun.
A debate with your mouth
Is sure to go south.
Is there anyone nuttier? None!
Tags: Campaign Satire, Donald Trump, Election Humor, GOP Idiocy, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Donald Trump, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on An Open Limerick To Donald Trump
Monday, March 23rd, 2015
Open Limerick To Ted Cruz
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My muse and I thank you, Ted Cruz.
We’re enthused by your news. No more blues!
I’m infused with elation.
You’re bruising our nation,
But your run means we rhymers can’t lose.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, GOP Idiocy, Presidential Election, Republicans Humor, Ted Cruz, Texas Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Ted Cruz, Texas Humor, White House | 1 Comment »
Monday, March 9th, 2015
Forty-seven Republican Senators have done something both appalling and unprecedented: They communicated directly with Iran in order to undermine Obama’s nuclear arms negotiations.
Now it’s one thing to try to convince Obama that Iran can’t be trusted to comply with a nuclear arms deal, or to try to impede an arms deal legislatively. But it’s quite another to essentially tell Iran not to bother complying because Obama deals aren’t worth the paper they’re printed on.
And the latter is precisely what they did. Here’s their open written message to Iran’s leaders, translated into a limerick:
Dear Iranian leaders, Obama
Might make you a nuke deal with drama.
But don’t bother to heed it.
We plan to defeat it.
So it’s worthless — each, word, clause, and comma.
Tags: Barack Obama, Foreign Policy, GOP, Iran, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, Foreign Policy, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on The Republican’s Open Limerick To Iran
Monday, March 2nd, 2015
Most Want President to Have a High School Diploma
A new Public Opinion Polling survey finds that 62% of voters think it’s important for the President to have a high school diploma, compared to only 31% who think it doesn’t matter.
Interesting: “There’s a large partisan divide on the issue: Democrats by an 81%-14% spread think it’s important, while Republicans are evenly divided on the matter at 45%-45%.”
When asked to respond to this poll, Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker said, “Only elitists and ISIS supporters would buy into that requirement, whereas Senator Rand Paul said, “Have I mentioned that I’m a doctor?”
Former Texas Governor Rick Perry, a fellow presidential hopeful, disagreed with both men, saying “Don’t glasses make me look smart?”
*****
UPDATE: I was chagrined to learn that my column has fallen afoul of Poe’s Law. What the heck is Poe’s Law? The “literary adage which stipulates that without a clear indicator of an author’s intended sarcasm it becomes impossible to tell the difference between an expression of sincere extremism and a parody of extremism.”
So for anyone who read this and accepted the poll as real and/or any of the quotes as real, this is hundred percent parody. It was inspired by an actual poll related to whether people believe a U.S. President should have a college degree.
UPDATE 2:
Poe’s Law compressed into a haiku:
In extremist times
reality/parody
appear to have merged.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Education Humor, Election Humor, Fake News, GOP Humor, News Parody, Parodies, Poe's Law, Rand Paul, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Scott Walker
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Fake News, GOP Humor, News Parodies, Political Limericks, Politics Satire, Rand Paul, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Scott Walker, White House | 3 Comments »
Monday, February 23rd, 2015
Why Republicans Embolden Our Enemies (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A government shutdown sounds sordid,
And I’m hoping it’s somehow aborted.
But the House GOP
Views the dangers with glee;
They assume they’ll again be rewarded.
Tags: GOP Idiocy, Government Shutdown, Homeland Security, House Republicans, Republicans Humor, Terrorists
Posted in GOP Humor, Government Services, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Terrorism | Comments Off on Why Republicans Embolden Our Enemies (Limerick)
Tuesday, February 3rd, 2015
Limerick Ode To Science Disbelievers
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Republican problem with science
Is their members respond with defiance
To facts that are proved.
(Have their brains been removed?)
They spread lies to excuse non-compliance.
*****
Refusing vaccines,
Don’t-Tell-Me-What-To-Doers
now infect us all.
*****
Exodus of thought–
an exodus of science–
the GOP way.
*****
Misinformation
delib’rately spread by Fox–
blindly accepted.
*****
Republican pols–
implacable enemy
of fairness and facts.
******
The truth-challenged pols
have taken over Congress–
therein LIES the rub.
*****
Tags: Anti-Science, Climate Change, Climate Science, Congress Humor, Fox News, Global Warming, GOP, Health Humor, Media Humor, Political Haiku & Senryu, Republicans Humor, Science Haiku, Science Humor, Science Senryu, Vaccine Humor
Posted in Climate Change, Global Warming, Health Satire, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Science Verse | Comments Off on Limerick Ode to Science Disbelievers plus Sundry Haiku
Monday, December 29th, 2014
Having It Both Ways (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Claim “Obama’s economy’s” sick?
Then take credit for upswings? How slick!
But my dear GOPers,
It doesn’t take seers
To know that you really must pick.
Tags: Economy, Economy Satire, Fiscal Crisis, Fiscal Humor, GOP, Obama poem, Republican Hypocrisy, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington | Comments Off on Having It Both Ways (Limerick)
Wednesday, November 19th, 2014
Inconvenient Facts (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Republicans love to get traction
By using executive action
As a pretext to jaw:
“Barack breaks the law!”–
Despite similar acts by their faction.
Immigration reform, for example:
Though Bush Senior and Reagan did ample
Such executive acts
It would seem, despite facts,
That on laws only Democrats trample.
Here’s a must-read, if you really want to understand the debate over deportations.
Tags: Barack Obama, Democrats Humor, Deportation Humor, Executive Action, Feigned Outrage, George Bush Sr., GOP, Immigration Humor, Immigration Reform, Republicans Humor, Ronald Reagan
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, Immigration Reform, Impeachment Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off on Inconvenient Facts (Limerick)
Wednesday, November 19th, 2014
Republican gals
awarded but one House chair–
housekeeping gavel.
Twenty-one gavels–
GOP guys get twenty.
One lone gal “keeps house.”
For those who are keeping score, Rep. Candice Miller is the only woman who will be wielding a gavel in the Republican-controlled House. Twenty committee chairmanships go to guys (mostly white), while the least prestigious one — the House Administration Committee — goes (again) to Miller.
Miller’s committee runs the day-to-day operations of the House. So if there’s a hearing about problems with the House cafeteria or bathrooms, Candice Miller’s “The Man.”
To be fair, the Administration Committee’s other principal function is oversight over federal elections. So I suppose Miller can also hold hearings on how to make it harder for Democrats to vote.
Tags: Candice Miller, Chairmanships, Election Humor, House Administration Committee, House Committees, House Republicans, House Satire, Republicans Humor
Posted in Election Satire, GOP Humor, House Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off on The Party Of White Guys Strikes Again
Wednesday, October 22nd, 2014
Chris Christie Wages War On Low-Wage Workers (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Chris Christie says minimum wage
Is too boring — he’s on a new page.
Dare to mention that matter—
He’ll spew out rude chatter.
Suggest raising it? Brace for his rage.
Tags: Chris Christie, GOP, Income Humor, Minimum Wage, Money Humor, New Jersey, Republicans Humor
Posted in Business Humor, Chris Christie, Employment Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Job Humor, Money And Finance Humor, New Jersey Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Wage Humor | Comments Off on Chris Christie Wages War On Low-Wage Workers (Limerick)
