Archive for the ‘Language Humor’ Category
Saturday, September 24th, 2022
How to punctuate: That is the query.
Ill-timed marks can be irksome and dreary.
Bangs, ellipses, and dashes
Add drama in flashes.
Overuse is abusive!!! — Be leery!!!!!
(National Punctuation Day is celebrated yearly on September 24th.)
Tags: Bangs, Dashes, Ellipses, Exclamation Marks, Grammar Humor, Grammar Limerick, Holiday Haiku, Language Satire, National Punctuation Day, Odd Holidays, Punctuation Day, Punctuation Humor, September Holidays, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Language Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Writing & Publishing Humor | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, September 14th, 2022
My self-challenge for today was writing a limerick using the new-to-me word “fugleman.”
An assertive, decisive, and frugal man
Was also an excellent bugle man.
He would make extra dough
Playing band gigs and so
In parades, he was always the fugleman.
Tags: Band Humor, Band Limerick, Bugle Humor, Bugle Limerick, Frugality, Fugleman, Marching Humor, Marching Limerick, Money & Finance Humor, Money Limerick, Music Humor & Verse, Music Limerick, Parade Humor, Parade Limericks
Posted in Language Humor, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, September 7th, 2022
I use new-to-me words in my verse;
Vain attempts to cajole and coerce
My old brain into learning
Their meaning. But spurning
Those efforts, my mind makes me curse.
So I’m forced to confess with veracity
That I wish I had greater capacity
To remember cool words,
But my brain’s for the birds,
Which explains all my failed orchidacity.
Tags: Brain Humor, Brain Limerick, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Memory Humor, Memory Limerick, Orchidacity, Showiness
Posted in Aging Humor & Verse, Language Humor, Limericks, Memory Humor | 7 Comments »
Monday, September 5th, 2022
Sometimes I challenge myself by using a hard-to-rhyme word in a limerick. In today’s case, it’s “latrinalia,” which means stuff written or drawn on bathroom walls.
Now before you say, “Lots of things rhyme with latrinalia, according to Rhymezone,” let me add that Rhymezone is WRONG!
Since the Final Stressed Syllable of latrinalia is NAL, true rhyme words must end in “alia” preceded by a Different Consonant, such as AuSTRalia, or mamMalia, or reGalia, or the two words I use in this limerick:
If you happen to read latrinalia,
You won’t find any sesquipedalia,
You’ll see swear words and gripes
Writ by marginal types,
But no poems inspired by Thalia.
Tags: Language Humor, Language Limerick, Rhyming Humor, Rhyming Limerick, Writing & Publishing Humor, Writing Limerick
Posted in Language Humor, Limericks, Writing & Publishing Humor | 1 Comment »
Saturday, September 3rd, 2022
How can I resist using “bombilation” in a limerick?
Bombilation is driving me nuts,
And it comes from a home that abuts
My backyard. I complain,
But I’m met with disdain.
My revenge? A large doghouse with mutts.
Tags: Animal & Pet Humor, Animal Limerick, Dog Humor, Dog Limerick, Noise Humor, Noise Limerick, Noise Poem, Pet Humor, Pet Limerick, Revenge Humor, Revenge Limerick
Posted in Animal & Pet Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Noise Humor | Comments Off on Sound Revenge (Limerick)
Wednesday, August 31st, 2022
Since Wordsmith’s “Word of the Day” today is “Hotheaded,” I decided to use it in a limerick:
A hotheaded fellow named Hugh
Was irked by a huge check-out queue.
To disperse the long line
He yelled “Gun!” — the damn swine.
He wears stripes now; “lines” up the wazoo!
Tags: Clothing Humor, Clothing Limerick, Gun Humor, Gun Limerick, Hotheaded, Language Humor, Lines Humor, Lines Limerick, Prison Humor, Prison Limerick, Queues Humor, Stripes, Word of the Day, WordSmith, WOTD
Posted in Clothing Humor, Crime & Punishment Humor, Guns & Safety Humor, Language Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Word of the Day | Comments Off on Hotheaded Hugh (Limerick)
Wednesday, August 24th, 2022
A mother-to-be gave a shiver.
Her whole body was soon all-aquiver.
She sobbed: “As predicted,
My diet’s restricted.
Doc told me it’s time to de-liver.”
Tags: Confusion Humor, Confusion Limerick, Diet Humor, Diet Limerick, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Maternity Humor, Maternity Limerick, Miscommunication Humor
Posted in Communication Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Language Humor, Limericks | Comments Off on The Confused Mom-To-Be (Limerick)
Sunday, August 7th, 2022
Sometimes, when I play with a new-to-me word, I get a bit silly:
“What color’s your purse?” asked a nurse.
“A deep purple?” The answer: “It’s ‘perse!’”
“Yes, I know. But what shade
Is your pocketbook’s suede?”
“I said ‘perse!’” (Plus a colorful curse.)
Tags: Colors Humor, Colors Limerick, Communication Humor, Communication Limerick, Fashion Humor, Fashion Limerick, Homonym Humor, Homonym Limericks, Homonym Poems, Homonyms, Homophone Limericks, Homophone Poems, Homophones, Perse, Wordplay Humor, Wordplay Limerick
Posted in Communication Humor, Fashion Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Wordplay | 2 Comments »
Thursday, July 21st, 2022
The WordleBot’s frequently callous
And when rating my play displays malice.
It shows frequent ill will;
Credits luck, rarely skill.
So it MUST have a miniscule phallus.
A Wordle solution in three
Brings me joy, so I’ll murmur: “Yay, me!”
Then I check with the Bot,
Who reviews what I got
And dispels any feelings of glee.
When I (rarely) solve Wordle in two,
All I get is a snide “Whoop Dee Doo!”
What’s it take for a pat
On the back from that rat?
This goes on too much longer? I’ll sue!
Tags: Games Humor, Games Limerick, Language Humor, Language Humour, Language Limerick, New York Times Humor, Puzzles Humor, Puzzles Limerick, Word Games, Word Usage Humor, Wordle, WordleBot
Posted in Games Humor, Language Humor, Limericks | 1 Comment »
Monday, June 6th, 2022
Question: If someone says, “I sanction that sanction,” do you know what he means?
The word “sanction’s” an odd term to use
Cuz it’s prone to perplex and confuse.
It can mean an approval…
Or trade-list removal.
In other words: Good or bad news.
Tags: Contranym Humor, Contranym Limerick, Contronym Humor, Contronym Limerick, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Sanction Limerick
Posted in Language Humor, Limericks | 2 Comments »
Saturday, May 21st, 2022
An annoying acquaintance loves roe
And dishes all covered in dough.
He’ll eat beef by the herd
And most any old bird,
But he’ll always refuse to eat crow.
Tags: Animal and Pet Humor, Argument Humor, Argument Limerick, Bad Behavior, Beef Humor, Behavior Humor, Bird Humor, Bird Limerick, Birds Humor, Crows, Eating Crow, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Fowl Humor, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Know-It-Alls, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Meat Humor, Poultry Humor, Wordplay, Wordplay Humor
Posted in Animal & Pet Humor, Behavior & Personality, Food & Drink Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Wordplay | Comments Off on A Recipe For Trouble (Limerick)
Friday, May 20th, 2022
A boy was bawled out by the nuns
For his sly use of off-color puns.
But he swore “I’m not punning!”
(The fellow was cunning.)
“Besides baking, just what’s done with buns?”
Tags: Bawdy Humor, Bawdy Limerick, Children Humor, Education & School Humor, Education Limerick, Nun Humor, Nun Limericks, Nuns, Pun Humor, Pun Limerick, Religion Humor, Religion Limerick, School Humor, School Limerick
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Children Humor, Education & School Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Religion Verse, Wordplay | Comments Off on The “Innocent” Punster (Limerick)
Wednesday, May 4th, 2022
Frustration’s a puzzling norm
When in word games like Wordle you’re warm:
You need one letter more
And you’re pissed to the core;
You’ve guessed “story” and “stork,” but it’s “storm.”
Tags: American English, Language Humor, Language Humour, Language Limerick, New York Times Humor, Puzzles Humor, Puzzles Limerick, Spelling Humor, Spelling Humour, Spelling Limerick, Word Games, Word Usage Humor, Wordle
Posted in Games Humor, Language Humor, Limericks | Comments Off on Wordle Downers (Limerick)
Wednesday, April 20th, 2022
Harold hadn’t cut corners in ages,
Despite his reduction in wages.
When told he should do it,
His answer was “Screw it!
That makes it too hard to turn pages.”
Tags: Cutting Corners, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Money & Finance Humor, Money Limerick, Reading Humor, Reading Limerick, Wages Humor, Wages Limerick
Posted in Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor | Comments Off on Cornered (Limerick)
Thursday, April 7th, 2022
A young gal grabbed her daughter to scold ’er:
“You should know better, now that you’re older.
Throwing snack food is rude,
Also wasteful and crude,”
Said the mom with a chip on her shoulder.
Tags: Badly Behaved Children, Child Humor, Food Humor, Food Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Parenting Humor, Parenting Limerick, Snack Food Humor
Posted in Children Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Parenting Humor | Comments Off on Snack Food Grievance (Limerick)
Wednesday, April 6th, 2022
A marathon runner named Ace
Loved to brag about every damn race.
His long-winded tales
Would induce plaintive wails:
“Stop meandering. Cut to the chase!”
Tags: Bragging Humor, Bragging Limerick, Competitive Humor, Competitive Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Marathon Humor, Marathon Limerick, Running Humor, Running Limerick, Talkative Limerick, Talkativeness
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Exercise Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Outdoors Humor | Comments Off on Long-Winded Limerick
Monday, April 4th, 2022
To cross ev’ry “T” ain’t just fine;
It’s required — not merely benign.
But by crossing a “U,”
You have set it askew…
And in fact you are crossing the line.
Tags: Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Writing & Publishing Humor, Writing Limerick
Posted in Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Writing & Publishing Humor | Comments Off on More Idiom Idiocy (Limerick)
Wednesday, March 23rd, 2022
A man did his best to disguise
His retinal issues with lies.
When at last he sought ocular
Aid, he was jocular:
“Doc, you’re a sight for sore eyes!”
(March 23 is World Optometry Day.)
Tags: Eye Humor, Eye Limerick, Eyes Humor, Eyes Limerick, Health & Medical Humor, Health Limerick, March Holidays, Odd Holidays, Optometrist, Optometry Day, Optometry Humor, Optometry Limerick, Patients Humor, Patients Limerick, Vision Humor, Vision Limerick
Posted in Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays, Vision Humor | 1 Comment »
Monday, March 21st, 2022
This is what happens when I play with idioms:
“Your home sale is under suspension,”
Read the notice, provoking dissension.
“Human bones have been found
In your yard, underground,
And those bones are the bone of contention.”
Tags: Bones Humor, Crime & Punishment Humor, Crime Limerick, Home Humor, Home Limerick, House Humor, House Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Real Estate Humor, Real Estate Limerick
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Crime & Punishment Humor, House & Home Humor, Idiom Humor, Language Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Real Estate Humor | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, February 22nd, 2022
Please help! I’m addicted to word games.
One might argue that some are absurd games.
I also play cards,
But (like linguists and bards)
Prefer verbal brain-teasers — my nerd games.
Tags: Addiction Humor, Addiction Limerick, Card Games, Double Dordle, Games Humor, Games Limerick, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Mini Crossword, Quordle, Spelling Bee Humor, Word Games, Wordle
Posted in Addiction Humor, Games Humor, Language Humor | Comments Off on My Latest Addiction (Limerick)