Archive for the ‘Social Media Humor’ Category

My Reaction to Facebook’s Upcoming “Reaction” Buttons (Limerick)

Wednesday, January 27th, 2016

Dear Facebook, your “like” button’s fine.
Add a “dislike” to “like?” I won’t whine.
But your plan for Reactions
Six button distractions–
Makes me certain the “sad” one will shine.

Few Seem To Heart Twitter’s New Hearts (Limerick)

Tuesday, November 3rd, 2015

When I signed onto Twitter today,
I found to my shock and dismay
That favs are now hearts.
Hence poisonous darts
Are turning its management gray.

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: STRIDE or ASTRIDE at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

Sunday, November 1st, 2015

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using either STRIDE or ASTRIDE at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

A jogger stopped trying to hide
Her concerns about being a bride;
She sent out this tweet
To her boyfriend: “You’re sweet.
Wedding’s off, though. Please take it in stride.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Is Facebook Messing With Me? (Limerick)

Monday, October 5th, 2015

Dear Facebook, I’m tired of clicking
On comments friends post, that ain’t sticking.
Fix your database please;
Stop your comment-list “tease.”
Piss off users? Your stats take a licking.

What I Do When Facebook Is Down (Limerick)

Monday, September 28th, 2015

During Facebook’s outage today, I was reduced to posting this limerick on Twitter:

#Facebookdown so I’ve come here 2 Tweet
& nobody takes a backseat
2 my posting addiction,
A dreadful affliction.
My FB surrender’s complete.

(“2” instead of “to,” “FB” instead of “Facebook,” and “&” instead of “and” all done in order to comply with Twitter’s 140-character limit.)

Stop Teasing Me, Twitter!

Wednesday, August 12th, 2015

Stop Teasing Me, Twitter!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

For a moment, I’m thrilled at the news:
“Twitter’s ending our 140 blues.”
But I’m joyous too soon–
Just DMs get that boon.
Tiny tweets will keep stifling my muse.

(DM on Twitter refers to Direct Message, much like Private Messages on Facebook.)

Blockheads On The Block (Limerick)

Monday, June 8th, 2015

A Facebooker constantly “yelled.”
No grievance he held could be quelled.
He’d gripe and he’d boast
On each post — now he’s toast;
From most friendships that fellow’s expelled.

Tweet Marvels (Limerick)

Friday, December 19th, 2014

Tweet Marvels (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I marvel @ poets who fit
A lim’rick on tweets. It takes grit
& patience & toil
2 manage 2 boil
Lim’ricks down so u read what I’ve writ.

Note: The 140 character per tweet limit on Twitter is a tough taskmaster; It was all I could do to fit the five lines in a tweet, even after changing “@” to “at,” “and” to “&,” “to” to “2,” and “you” to “u.”

And even then, there was no room for my title, byline, post URL, or this hashtagged indication of what prompt inspired me: #5prompt (marvel.)

Limerick Ode To National Unfriend Day (Nov. 17)

Monday, November 17th, 2014

Limerick Ode To National Unfriend Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Do Internet pests take their toll
And play an insidious role
In your Facebooking life?
You can deal with such strife:
Just unfriend all those trolls. Take control!

Open Limerick To Hubby Mark

Friday, December 27th, 2013

I wrote this limerick in response to Mark’s post about being urged by Facebook to “like” Kim Kardashian’s page.

Open Limerick To Hubby Mark
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Mark, I don’t mean to sound prim,
But I’d rather you NOT be-friend Kim.
If you do, your IQ
(already askew)
Will drop points till your brain power’s dim.

Twitter Limerick Fit

Thursday, August 1st, 2013

Not only does dVerse’s Sam Peralta ask us to write poetry on Twitter, he wants our poems to be precisely 140 characters. So here goes — a Twitter limerick, 140 characters on the nose:

It’s hard to fit lim’ricks on Twitter,
A wonderful haiku transmitter.
When I try to write short
I’m forced to abort
& verses alas lose their

And here it is on my @Madkane Twitter account.

Smite SMODJ! (Limerick)

Friday, July 19th, 2013

This limerick was inspired by Facebook friend Douglas Frank, who proposed a new texting acronym:

SMODJ, pronounced similar to “smudge.”
It stands for: Social Media Outrage Du Jour.

Smite SMODJ! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Social Media Outrage Du Jour
(SMODJ, for short) can be tough to endure.
Angry pro and con litter
In Facebook and Twitter
Stream ceaselessly. Stop, please! No more!

Facebook Faces The Hashtag Music

Friday, June 14th, 2013

Facebook Faces The #Hashtag Music (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Facebook honchos have fin’ly said “yes”
To #hashtags, but under duress:
All the cool kids at Twitter
Treat hashtags like glitter,
A trend Facebook dares not transgress.

#Facebookhashtag #Facebookhashtags #hashtagsfacebook #hashtagfacebook

Timeline Fix (Limerick)

Monday, May 13th, 2013

Facebook has changed its Timelines again — loading up our left columns with all sorts of images. But my 3-verse limerick provides the solution:

Timeline Fix
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Facebook timelines have sunk to a crawl.
They’re so slow, that I just want to bawl.
But I’ve figured the reason
They seems to be freezin’:
With pics, FB’s littered the wall.

I’m referring to pics on the left—
A long column of imagery heft.
Books and “like” pics galore,
Movies, TV, and more.
But it’s fixable. Don’t feel bereft!

There’s an option that Facebook calls “hide”
For most image groups — on their right side.
Strip that left column bare:
With few images there,
It won’t feel like your Timeline has died.

Hashtag Madness (Limerick)

Monday, April 8th, 2013

Please relax Cher fans — Cher is still alive:

Legions of Twitter users were fooled into thinking the pop singer had passed after people began posting about late British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher under the hashtag #nowthatcherisdead.

Hashtag Madness (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“Nowthatcherisdead” — hashtag blur
Has created one hell of a stir:
Dear fans of Ms. Cher,
Who’ve read “news” you can’t bear:
Cher’s alive. Thatcher’s dead. As you were!

Dear Facebook: Enough With The Questions! (Limerick)

Wednesday, January 23rd, 2013

Every time I sign on to Facebook, I’m confronted by stupid questions from Facebook, meant to prompt me to post. Alas, they’re more likely to prompt me to scream.

Dear Facebook: Enough With The Questions! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Facebook, don’t ask how I’m doing,
Or feeling or even what’s brewing.
“How’s it going?” will rile me.
Don’t try to beguile me
With gimmicks, or brace for some booing.

Limerick Treat (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, November 11th, 2012

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow would frequently treat…*

or

A woman would frequently treat…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Treat
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow would frequently treat
His friends to tall tales from a tweet.
He assumed Twitter’s feed
Was a factual read,
But its myth-spreading speed can’t be beat.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Muse Amusement (Limerick)

Saturday, January 28th, 2012

I was browsing my GooglePlus feed, when I encountered this post by poet Tyler Lovelace:

I hate when the first verse of a poem writes itself just to tease you. Then you have to force a lot of the poem out.

I swear my muses are all teases and skanks.

Tyler’s post prompted me to write this comment:

Trimmed down, that could make you a good limerick first line:
“My muses are teases and skanks …”

Tyler immediately (and generously) said the line was mine, thereby becoming my non-tease, non-skanky muse.

Here’s my limerick:

Muse Amusement
By Madeleine Begun Kane

My muses are teases and skanks—
At their worst when my mind’s drawing blanks.
When they offer me rot,
Then I warn them, “Do not
Expect thanks for a concept that tanks!”

Yet Another Facebook Rant

Tuesday, January 17th, 2012

If Facebook’s trying to annoy its users, it’s doing a really good job of it.

Lots of people (including me) have been wondering why their Facebook posts have been getting fewer comments and “likes.” Turns out that most people aren’t seeing the latest posts. Why? Because the “powers that be” at Facebook are morons!

To be more specific, Facebook’s News Feed default setting is now delivering old posts, referred to in polite company as “Highlighted Posts.” Want to see fresh posts, like a normal, sane person? Then you have to click on “Sort” and then select “Recent Stories First.”

To make matters worse, selecting “Recent Stories First” must be done routinely. Why? Because Facebook doesn’t allow you to permanently change its “Ancient Stories That You’re Really Sick Of & Never Want To See Again” default.

My Facebook rant wouldn’t be complete without a limerick, would it?

Yet Another Facebook Rant
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Facebook, I wish you would halt
Your News Feed’s annoying default:
It’s simply not sporting
To make us do sorting
To see posts that are fresh. Oy gevalt!

Political Un-Friendship (Limerick)

Thursday, January 12th, 2012

My Facebook friend, comedy writer/director/producer Chris Bearde, recently said:

Satire, taken broadly as a form of comedy protest, will bring you FB friends and lose you some too… so the playing field is always level.

Chris’s comments inspired me to write this limerick:

Political Un-Friendship (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Facebook friends can at times take offense
At jokes at their party’s expense.
If they click on “unfriend”
In order to end
Such humor exposure, they’re dense.

UPDATE: I’ve just found out that November 17th is National Unfriend Day. Apparently, the holiday was invented three years ago by Jimmy Kimmel. So, who should be “unfriended?” According to Kimmel, the “proud parent,” “the Instagrammer,” and the “overly-political poster” should all be history. Methinks I fall afoul of the third category.