Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: STRIDE or ASTRIDE at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using either STRIDE or ASTRIDE at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

A jogger stopped trying to hide
Her concerns about being a bride;
She sent out this tweet
To her boyfriend: “You’re sweet.
Wedding’s off, though. Please take it in stride.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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59 Responses to “Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: STRIDE or ASTRIDE at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5”

  1. Daisy Mae Simon says:

    I’ve been quite obsessed, I confide
    Too excited to take things in stride
    I’m a fan who’s quite loyal
    Love those Men In Blue Royals
    And their impending crown- #KC Pride!

  2. Brian Allgar says:

    The lion would lazily stride
    Round his patch, or just lie on his side.
    “Hunt for dinner? Nah, this is
    A job for the missus –
    It’s housework, and I have my pride.”

  3. Brian Allgar says:

    She walked with a confident stride
    To show she had nothing to hide,
    But they found in her rack
    Forty ounces of crack –
    Her D-cups were B-cups inside.

  4. Brian Allgar says:

    In the desert, the hunter espied
    A corpse with two vultures astride.
    As they picked off the meat,
    He said “That looks like Pete –
    Guess he won’t be in need of a ride.”

  5. Brian Allgar says:

    The hooker was firmly astride,
    And her john was enjoying the ride.
    But his half-hour was up,
    She had others to shtup;
    “Oh, baby, I’m coming!” she lied.

  6. Brian Allgar says:

    Julius Caesar was said to bestride
    Like a mighty Colossus, world-wide.
    Cleopatra soon found
    That the rumour was sound:
    “It’s true, he’s colossal”, she sighed.

  7. colonialist says:

    A lady in skirts took a stride
    In crossing a manhole; inside
    The man down below
    Felt interest grow –
    A whole new dimension he’d spied.

  8. colonialist says:

    When horse riding bareback, astride,
    The pounding a man can’t abide;
    A woman is kitted
    To be better fitted,
    To the end she gets pleasure applied.

  9. Jesse Levy says:

    I wanted to take it in stride
    But I do have a lot of Mets pride
    Last night when they lost
    my heart turned to frost
    and I almost (just almost) cried.

  10. Jesse Levy says:

    Brian, “up” and “schtup” don’t actually rhyme.

  11. Judith H. Block says:

    A gal’s told to take it in stride,
    But it’s not very good for her pride,
    When her looks start to go,
    And her deep wrinkles show;
    For younger babes, she’s cast aside.

  12. Judith H. Block says:

    He excitedly moved while astride
    The gal who lay there, opened wide.
    The deed consummated
    He was satiated.
    She just came along for the ride.

  13. Mark Kane says:

    ‘Harlem Stride Piano’, ‘Stride Piano’, or ‘Stride’, is a jazz piano style that was developed in the large cities of the East Coast, mainly New York, during the 1920s and 1930s.

    Thomas “Fats” Waller’ is still the most famous proponent of this form of jazz piano playing, so I’ve dedicated this limerick to him:

    The pianist, “Fats” Waller, was wide,
    With a playful competitive side.
    So as all can attest,
    Given any request,
    He would take it and play it in ‘Stride.’

  14. Dave Johnson says:

    With Lady Godiva astride,
    They went for a notable ride.
    What the villagers saw
    Wasn’t sanctioned by law;
    But some were left swollen with pride

  15. Mark Kane says:

    Last night my lovely wife Madeleine and I strolled down to our neighborhood rooftop bar, to do shots and watch our Mets lose the fourth game of this year’s ‘World Series’. That’s what inspired this limerick:

    Most ‘Mets Fans’ take losing in stride,
    As they cheer them with vigorous pride.
    But choosing the place,
    For this World Series race,
    Requires them ‘High and Inside.’

  16. She always walked with pride
    And then she became a bride
    “It’s time to unwind
    No longer refined
    My legs are consummately astride”

  17. She walked with a definitive stride
    Her gait always cut and dried
    Then she met Dick
    Who changed her real quick
    Now she walks around starry-eyed

  18. Marty McCullen says:

    I wanted her for my next bride,
    But she always managed to hide.
    She said I was slick
    At turning a trick,
    But couldn’t ride horses astride.

  19. Tom Harris says:

    Priscilla took it all in stride
    When she became young Percy’s bride.
    She loved only him,
    Until, on a whim,
    She took three lovers on the side.

  20. Tom Harris says:

    His love organ, withered and dried,
    Robert could no longer keep stride
    With those young and horny.
    Though with Sigourney,
    The sly geezer certainly tried.

  21. Ian Graham says:

    He’d later regret having tried
    To make Soccer Sally his bride.
    Her vision of heaven
    Was teams of eleven
    Whereas he liked to play two astride.

  22. Brian Allgar says:

    Jesse, according to my rhyming dictionary, “up” and “shtup” (with no “c”) DO rhyme.l

    Note from Mad Kane: The Rhyming dictionary’s clearly not Jewish then, as opposed to both Jesse and me. :) I’m afraid that Jesse’s right. This Yiddish-derived word, spelled either schtup or shtup, has a u sound that’s more like the oo sound in book.

  23. Brian Allgar says:

    (This is a slightly modified version that replaces the one higher up.)

    Julius Caesar was said to bestride,
    Like Colossus, the world far and wide.
    Cleopatra soon found
    That the rumour was sound:
    “It’s the truth, he’s colossal”, she sighed.

  24. Brian Allgar says:

    (… wishful thinking, perhaps)

    It’s hard to take things in his stride
    When his ratings continue to slide.
    Here’s a riddle: Explain,
    What do Donald’s campaign
    And his hair have in common? —Both dyed.

  25. She went to Dr. Mc Bride
    So he could pull her legs astride
    It seems that Mama
    Said with her usual drama

  26. The man with the sexy stride
    Gazed at me and implied
    We’ll go to Le Cirque
    But he was such a jerk
    He took me for quite a ride

  27. When you walk with a confident stride
    You exude a certain pride
    Then you cough
    And your pants fall off
    And you end up with your brain downright fried

  28. Dave Johnson says:

    When fulfilling the moment astride,
    You might want to try EZ Glide.
    Just squeezing our tube
    For a nice, quickie lube
    Will ensure a most comfortable ride.

  29. Brian Allgar says:

    Well, never mind, Mad. After all, there are dialects in England (Yorkshire, for instance) where “up” is pronounced “oop”, so I’m covered – at least, I would be if I were a Yorkshireman.

    It’s true that most dictionaries give only the “oop” pronunciation. However, Wikipedia gives two phonetic possibilities: /ʃtʌp/, /ʃtʊp/. Unfortunately, I don’t know the phonetic alphabet …

  30. Hmm… Brian, perhaps you were thinking not of the Yiddish “shtup” but the similar Old English “shtup”, pronounced “tup”, in which the “sh” is silent… as in “Sh! don’t say ‘sh’!”

    Or maybe I’m full of (silent)it.

  31. Quoth the alchemist, glowing with pride
    At his latest alchemical stride:
    “With this potion, behold!
    I shall never grow old!”
    (Then he choked as he swallowed, and died.)

  32. If I walk with a spring in my stride…
    If I seem “bushy-tailed and bright-eyed”…
    Well, I’ve met a new girl,
    And my head’s in a whirl.
    Now excuse me: I must kiss the bride.

  33. “Archaeologists take it in stride
    When they call us ‘grave robbers’,” he sighed.
    “Now I’m off. I’ve a big
    Ancient Barrow to dig
    On the Banks of the Bonnie auld Clyde.”

  34. Brian Allgar says:

    Sir Jasper was fast; with one stride
    He was on her. “Oh, Sir, I’m untried!”
    “Not for long, here’s my yard!”
    But he couldn’t get hard –
    Viagra was not yet supplied.

  35. A maiden was told she must ride
    A horse,with her feet to one side
    To this day it’s rumored
    She showed off her bloomers
    When mounting the equine astride


    When you walk with a confident stride
    You exude a certain pride
    Then you cough
    And your pants fall off
    There you are with your brain all fried

  37. They walked with a loving stride
    He as her devoted guide
    Then he tripped on a rock
    She went into shock
    Now they’re buried side by side

  38. So joyful she was a bride
    Perpetually starry-eyed
    On a shopping spree
    She did shockingly see
    Out of the Holiday Inn he did stride

  39. Dave Johnson says:

    A hooker was sitting astride,
    While her client was up for the ride.
    When his big moment came,
    She called out the name
    Of the 8:00 waiting outside.

  40. Dave Johnson says:

    The G.O.P. candidates cried:
    “That last debate altered our stride!”
    CNBC showed
    They cannot bear the load;
    A FOX hole is where they should hide.

  41. Fred Bortz says:

    The GOP hopefuls have tried
    To convince us that science has lied.
    But as temperatures soar
    And the superstorms roar,
    The facts are just hitting their stride.

    All but one, Lindsay Graham, denied
    That we all need to act ‘ere we’re fried.
    But alas, every poll
    Shows him deep in the hole.
    His chances have practically died.

    And his other views? I can’t abide.
    So I’ll never be found on his side.
    In November sixteen
    There’ll be no in-between.
    I’ll vote Clinton or Sanders with pride.

  42. Raphael Harris says:

    Look man, i take it in stride,
    You know what they say, ‘time and tide’,
    A girl should say, ‘no’,
    When guys ask for…you know,
    Or the doctor may say, ‘the hare died’.

  43. John Armstrong says:

    The captain measures his stride
    Seeking his treasure to hide
    To the west one must hie
    From the hanged dead man’s eye
    There sixteen souls shall abide

  44. Tim James says:

    From high in the stands he espied
    The trotter he’d bet on break stride.
    That’s an instant DQ.
    He cried out, “Oh, screw you!”
    Now we’re seeing his sad, sulky side.

  45. Dave Johnson says:

    As the current Republican pride,
    He walks with a confident stride.
    But logic heads south
    When he opens his mouth;
    Ben Carson is hard to abide.

  46. David Reddekopp says:

    A man was once standing astride
    A woman who flatly denied
    Him entry. She’d beg
    “Your gigantic third leg
    Is too big!” He left unsatisfied.

  47. You could always discern his stride
    From the front, back, and side
    Chaplin was his name
    Achieving international fame
    His genius: totally bonafide

  48. Suzanne Heymann says:

    The soldiers all marched in their stride
    Wore their uniforms gladly with pride
    But what good is a war
    If just one out of four
    Comes back home while the others have died?

  49. Suzanne Heymann says:

    Hiding In Plain Sight:

    A passing parade came in stride
    Where two bank robbers thought they could hide
    Lost their clothes, lost their loot
    ‘Cept their low-hanging fruit
    The parade, it turned out, was Gay Pride.

  50. Suzanne Heymann says:

    A john sought a wench he could ride
    Saw two ladies and couldn’t decide
    They both said, “Ooo-la-la!
    Let’s do ménage aux trois!”
    He agreed and took both in his stride.

  51. Ailsa McKillop says:

    Jane Austen took things in her stride
    But could not her book’s title decide
    For the plot she’d created
    Of a lion group hated.
    It came to her: Prejudice and Pride!

  52. Dave Johnson says:

    A major league rookie named Clyde
    Was running the base path in stride
    With a ball girl named Flo
    To whom he would show
    His headlong professional slide.

  53. Ailsa McKillop says:

    Through dark London streets he would stride
    Indulging his vices with pride.
    This sociopath freak
    In vain did they seek:
    Dr Jekyll’s creation, Ted Hyde.

  54. Jim says:

    Not wanting her knot to be tied,
    She ran from the church with great stride.
    Her dad tracked her down,
    To get back the gown,
    Before the return policy applied.

  55. Suzanne Heymann says:

    He played his trombone with such glide
    Thus arousing his woman inside
    They tied music with sex
    Bound together with flex
    As she’d ride on his slide in her stride.

  56. David Reddekopp says:

    Add a woman with glide in her stride
    Subtract clothes (on the floor, or outside)
    Then in your consummation
    Use multiplication
    Once you get her legs to divide.

  57. Allen Wilcox says:

    There was once a young fellow from Hyde
    Park who thought that he could if he tried.
    He did and his fight
    For the House that was White
    Left him with a spring in his stride.

  58. Allen Wilcox says:

    Not the first time I neglected to use the required word Mad.
    Could you substitute the following for the last line?

    Left him with a spring in his stride.

  59. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun week of limericks.

    This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners: Limerick of the week 238.

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Limerick-Off Snipe.