A crazy conductor named Dick
Had a fondness for “food on a stick.”
The guy was far gone;
Used his skewer-baton
To throw food at the winds with a flick.
*****
Happy “Something On A Stick Day.” (March 28)
Archive for the ‘Odd Holidays’ Category
Conductor Misconduct (Limerick)
Monday, March 28th, 2022Retaining Your Sense Of Humor (Limerick)
Wednesday, March 23rd, 2022A man did his best to disguise
His retinal issues with lies.
When at last he sought ocular
Aid, he was jocular:
“Doc, you’re a sight for sore eyes!”
(March 23 is World Optometry Day.)
My Sock Solution (Limerick)
Thursday, March 17th, 2022I always wear socks inside out.
That’s unseemly to many, no doubt.
But my feet ain’t discreet:
“Scratchy sock-seams,” they bleat.
How I hate when extremities shout!
May 9 is National Lost Sock Memorial Day. And December 4 is National Sock Day.
Happy Math Day!
Monday, March 14th, 2022Today (March 14) is “International Day Of Mathematics,” which gives me a good excuse to post this limerick:
A professor would often deride
His students as slackers who lied:
“For math you need smarts.
You’ve no brains. Try the arts.
You want me to pass you? Denied!”
Limerick Ode To The Printed Book
Wednesday, February 23rd, 2022I’m celebrating “Printed Book Day” (February 23) with my Limerick Ode To The Printed Book:
An occasional e-book is fine,
And I love reading columns online.
But I cherish the feel
Of a book that is REAL.
My ideal? Printed pages and spine.
Digital Madness (Limerick)
Monday, February 21st, 2022Tomorrow’s unique! Here’s a clue:
Zero-Two/ Twenty-Two/ Twenty-Two.
So start spreading the news:
Due to all of its twos,
There’s innumerous “Twosday” ado.
Happy Twosday!
Unnoteworthy Limerick
Tuesday, February 8th, 2022“The soprano attempted a note
That is out of her range,” went the quote
From the Op’ra Review.
“It was shrill, like a shrew.” —
A critique that still sticks in her throat.
(Opera Day is celebrated on two different days: February 8 and October 25.)
Happy “Read Aloud Day!” (Limerick)
Wednesday, February 2nd, 2022I’m a big believer in reading one’s limericks aloud to check for errors. And since it’s “World Read Aloud Day” (celebrated on the first Wednesday of February) I have a good excuse to post this limerick:
Reading lim’ricks aloud can be useful.
You may find that your meter’s abuseful.
Have you broken rhyme-laws?
(Your eye can miss flaws.)
So try it, and don’t be excuseful.
This Insult Won’t Fly (Limerick)
Wednesday, February 2nd, 2022Today is “World Ostrich Day.” And according to the Reid Park Zoo, the “second of February (2/2) was chosen to celebrate these unique birds because they only have two toes per foot!”
And the other interesting thing about ostriches, is that the whole “bury their head in the sand” thing is a myth. And that brings me to my latest two-verse limerick:
The ostrich’s rep has been bruised,
And ostriches aren’t amused.
We have all been misled;
They don’t bury their head
In the sand. They are falsely accused.
So if someone you know tends to hide
From the facts, shield the ostriches’ pride.
It’s time to adapt;
Find an insult more apt
Than “ostrich” with which to deride.
Croissants Caught In The Crosshairs (Limerick)
Sunday, January 30th, 2022The croissant’s a beloved dessert:
“That crescent’s the best!” some assert.
But others say “no”
To “wasting” their dough
On “stuff that’s less healthy than dirt.”
“National Croissant Day” is celebrated each year on January 30.
A Curmudgeon Confesses (Limerick)
Saturday, January 29th, 2022“A curmudgeon? Who, me? I’ll concede
That I tend to find fault with great speed.
And I often get cranky;
You might need a hanky
To deal with your tears from my screed.”
National Curmudgeons Day is celebrated each year on January 29.
Limerick For A Puzzling Day
Saturday, January 29th, 2022It’s “Puzzle Day.” Which one’s your fav?
I’ll try the Times Crossword, when brave.
I’m better at Mini;
Don’t feel like a ninny.
But it’s Wordle I savor and crave!
National Puzzle Day is celebrated each year on January 29.
Limerick Ode To “Just Do It” Day.
Monday, January 24th, 2022Today is the day to “Just Do It!”
If you don’t, you may possibly rue it.
What’s that thing you should do?
Perhaps one or a few
Things that scare you. You have some? I knew it!
National Just Do It Day falls on January 24.
My Handwriting Morass (Limerick)
Sunday, January 23rd, 2022It’s “National Handwriting Day.”
Can my scrawl be deciphered? No way!
Don’t attempt to decrypt
My handwritten script;
You’ll be stumped by my scribbly display.
January 23 is “National Handwriting Day.”
Limerick Ode To The Eagles
Monday, January 10th, 2022“Save The Eagles Day” — that’s today’s brand.
It’s a national day in our land.
Lest there be some confusion
Or even delusion,
I don’t mean the team or the band.
(“Save The Eagles Day” is celebrated each year on January 10.)
Aggrieved Roommate (Limericks)
Wednesday, January 5th, 2022“I’m sick of your cockatiel’s turds!
Plus it bit me again!” — angry words
From a roommate, unmuffled,
Whose feathers were ruffled.
“I’m moving. Your pet’s for the birds!”
*****
There are several bird-related holidays:
National Bird Day (January 5)
Northern Parrots National Cockatiel Day (May 20)
World Parrot Day (May 31)
Trivial Limerick
Tuesday, January 4th, 2022Here’s some info that’s useless, but true.
It is “Trivia Day.” (“Braille Day” too.)
My attempts to retain
Random facts are in vain.
So what day is today? I’ve no clue!
(Both Trivia Day and Braille Day are celebrated each year on January 4.)
Engaged By The Cello (Limerick)
Wednesday, December 29th, 2021My beau plays the cello. His bow
Makes the loveliest music I know.
I love him, I think,
But my mother, a shrink,
Says I won’t, once I’ve heard Lorne Munroe.
Happy “International Cello Day!” (December 29)
