The blame game is going strong with the customary false equivalencies.
Limerick Ode To The Not-So-Super Committee
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Super Committee’s derailed,
And now we are being regaled
With tales blaming Dems
Sold as “media gems.”
It’s “balanced” reporting that’s failed.
Herman Cain was interviewed by CBN’s David Brody and uttered this priceless quote regarding his readiness for “gotcha questions:”
“When they ask me who’s the president of Ubeki-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan I’m going to say you know, I don’t know. Do you know? And then I’m going to say how’s that going to create one job?”
Limerick Ode To Herman Cain
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Herman Cain has an answer he’ll lob
At the press in a weave and a bob:
When he’s gotcha-ness leery
He’ll sneer at the query,
“How’s that going to create one job?”
Steve Benen points us to yet another example of the media blaming the wrong political party. According to the Washington Post, the Democrats, in resisting Republican precedent-changing demands for FEMA disaster relief offsets, was starting a “fight over a side issue:”
But Democrats decided to pick a fight over a side issue: an insistence by the GOP to pay for more disaster relief funding by cutting a popular auto-industry loan program. Republicans refused to back down.
So let me get this straight: Republicans try to change the rules, thereby holding disaster victims hostage … and it’s the Democrats’ fault?
This calls for two poems: a limerick and a tanka:
Dear Washington Post, you are wrong
With your Democrats started it song.
Disaster relief
Is the cause of this beef.
Give those offset demands a loud gong.
*****
Republican pols
Demand FEMA fund offsets—
Hold victims hostage,
While “liberal media”
Blames Dems for starting the fight.
*****
Certain media people are doing Rick Perry a huge favor by lowering the bar with tales of Perry being a lousy debater.
Limerick Ode to Rick “Bad Debater” Perry
By Madeleine Begun Kane
When press people lower the bar,
They enable a pol to go far.
Exceed expectations,
Then get more ovations,
And become a political star.
It amazes me that anyone could call David Gregory’s Newt Gingrich interview a “gotcha” interview. Yet that’s exactly what Newt’s been doing in the wake of his campaign’s self-destruction.
However, if you read the Meet The Press transcript, it’s clear that nobody trapped Gingrich into condemning Paul Ryan’s Medicare plan as undesirable “right-wing social engineering.”
So here’s my theory: Newt and his fellow Republicans have been coddled and spoiled by Fox News. As a result, many of them have lost their edge and can no longer handle themselves when asked even-handed questions.
I never thought I’d be saying this but…
Thank You Fox News (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
While Fox has been tempting to mock
Cuz its cov’rage is mostly a crock,
Softball questions spoiled Newt,
Who can’t handle a brute
Like Dave Gregory — Fox News, you rock!
UPDATE: To add to my amusement, Newt Gingrich is trying to forbid people from quoting his Ryan Plan criticism in an ad. Here’s Newt: “any ad which quotes what I said on Sunday is a falsehood. Because I have said publicly those words were inaccurate.”
Lots of luck with that, Newt.
By now you’ve surely heard that the Brooklyn-based Hasidic newspaper Der Tzitung “disappeared” Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and another woman from the iconic White House Situation Room photo, taken while the Osama bin Laden attack was going down:
The original photo, taken as the raid was occurring, famously shows Clinton in the center of the room, with her hand over her mouth. But the newspaper Der Tzitung, described by the Jewish Week as “ultra-Orthodox,” has a policy of never printing photos of women in its pages because it thinks they could be sexually suggestive. Thus, Clinton and counterterrorism director Audrey Tomason, who was seen standing at the back of the room, were removed from the picture.
In a non-apology apology, Der Tzitung said in part:
In accord with our religious beliefs, we do not publish photos of women, which in no way relegates them to a lower status. Publishing a newspaper is a big responsibility, and our policies are guided by a Rabbinical Board. Because of laws of modesty, we are not allowed to publish pictures of women, and we regret if this gives an impression of disparaging to women, which is certainly never our intention. We apologize if this was seen as offensive.
Some people may find the following limerick to be offensive. And to them I say, too damn bad!
Hillary Clinton — Bombshell? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
What a shame that some men are so weak,
They can’t handle so much as a peek
Of a Hillary pic.
Seems they fear that their dick
Can’t withstand her alluring physique.
UPDATE: A very funny take on this same topic.
Paul Ryan’s budget plan is both radical and fraudulent. But that doesn’t prevent an astounding number of journalists (who presumably count with their fingers) from treating it with respect and referring to it as “serious” and “bold.”
Limerick Ode To The Math-Challenged Media
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The math-challenged journos who laud
Ryan’s radical plan and applaud,
Say it’s “serious,” “bold,”
But his plan has no hold
On reality — naught but a fraud.
I almost always disagree with George Will. So it pains me to say this, but George Will is right. I’m referring, of course, to Will’s column lamenting the Republican 2012 presidential prospects — more specifically, the “vibrations of weirdness emanating from people associated with the party.” He illustrates his column with recent Mike Huckabee and Newt Gingrich shenanigans. And he doesn’t sound all that thrilled with the rest of the Republican pack.
That brings me to my latest limerick:
Weirdness from George Will
By Madeleine Begun Kane
George Will wrote a column with bite
On the GOP president fight.
He finds weirdness within
The candidate din.
Had to happen one day — Will is right.
I wrote this when the story of the Scott Walker / David Koch prank phone call first broke. But then I somehow forgot to post it. So a belated bravo to Ian Murphy of the Buffalo Beast for playing that entertaining and enlightening stunt on Scott “Union Buster” Walker. And now, at last, my limerick:
Limerick Ode To Wisconsin Governor Walker
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gov. Walker has fallen afoul
Of a prank that made Democrats howl.
He lengthily spoke
To a pseudo Dave Koch,
Spouting schemes that make honest folk scowl.
A Satirist’s Lament
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Tell me, what should I do when the news
Is so tragic, it gives me the blues?
Though my job is to mock it,
I just want to block it
And shield my poor overwrought muse.
I posted this limerick on my other blog, but it seems to be a better fit here:
The Problem With The Media Explained
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The journos compete in a race
To file columns and fill blogging space.
So nonsense abounds
In ill-informed mounds
Of opinions and factoids off base.
I was pleased to hear that Keith Olbermann has a new gig at Current TV.
In his new role, Olbermann will debut a new nightly show sometime in “late Spring.” The five-nights-a-week show will air in primetime (the exact timeslot, along with the precise start date are still undetermined), and Olbermann described it as “an improved and amplified” version of Countdown. The show will be produced at studios in New York City.
In addition to hosting the new show, Olbermann will consult and executive produce additional programming for Current, which could include bringing new hosts to the network as part of a primetime lineup of news and politics.
I thought I’d celebrate with a limerick:
Keith’s Current News
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Keith’s been hired by Current TV.
Will he rescue Gore’s baby? We’ll see.
He’ll be back to reports
That are newsy — not sports.
It bodes well for progressive esprit.
(My Limerick Ode To Keith Olbermann on his MSNBC departure is here.)
I, for one, am enjoying the Bill Kristol / Glenn Beck feud:
Last week, Fox News’ Glenn Beck launched a week-long effort to explain developments in Egypt as only he can. The deranged media personality cooked up truly bizarre conspiracy theories — even by his standards…
Over the weekend, The Weekly Standard’s William Kristol, a Fox News contributor, had seen enough. “[H]ysteria is not a sign of health,” Kristol wrote in a new column. “When Glenn Beck rants about the caliphate taking over the Middle East from Morocco to the Philippines, and lists (invents?) the connections between caliphate-promoters and the American left, he brings to mind no one so much as Robert Welch and the John Birch Society. He’s marginalizing himself, just as his predecessors did back in the early 1960s.”
Now let’s face it — Glenn Beck’s behavior has to be pretty crazy for a neoconservative like Kristol to write that sort of critique. And that brings me to my latest limerick:
It’s Kristol Clear That Beck Is Nuts
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Bill Kristol said Beck’s gone too far,
Which means Glenn’s scaled a very high bar.
Cuz when Bill says enough
To a wingnut, that’s rough.
Yes, Glenn’s sanity’s way under par.
I’m betting that most of you are alarmed by AOL’s acquisition of the Huffington Post. As you can see from this Limerick Ode To AOL’s Huffington Post Acquisition, so am I.
I was stunned to learn that Keith Olbermann is leaving Countdown and MSNBC effective immediately. Although I sometimes disagreed with him and even poked fun at Keith in verse, Olbermann’s departure leaves a gaping hole in my podcast-watching schedule.
I’ll miss Keith and look forward to his next show, wherever he turns up. In the meantime, here’s a limerick in his honor:
Limerick Ode To Keith Olbermann
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Keith, to my shock and dismay
I’ve learned that you’re going away.
Though I’ve mocked you at times
For bombacity crimes,
I miss you already. Oy vey!
Mad Kane (Madeleine Begun Kane) is a writer, musician, and "recovering lawyer." She won the Robert Benchley Society Award For Humor and enjoys writing limericks, song parodies, and current events haiku.
You can email her at madkane@madkane.com, visit her non-political humor blog, or stop by her home page.
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Pressing The Press On Voter Suppression (Limerick)
Monday, October 3rd, 2011Steve Benen has written an excellent post about the underreported voter suppression scandal:
And the Brennan Center For Justice has produced a frightening study of these “radical” voting law changes.
Now if only the media would take some time out from its hefty will-he-or-won’t-he Christie coverage, to report on this important issue.
Pressing The Press On Voter Suppression (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The GOP war on our voting
Is a problem the press isn’t noting.
Unfair laws will suppress
Dem votes with finesse,
The Republican prospects promoting.
Tags: Brennan Center, Election Humor, GOP Humor, Legislation Humor, Media Humor, Republicans Humor, Steve Benen, Voter ID, Voter Suppression, Voting Limerick, War On Voting
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