Archive for the ‘Contests’ Category
Sunday, July 17th, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow I tried to ignore…
or
A woman I tried to ignore…
Here’s mine:
Rude Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow I tried to ignore
Was a rude, inconsiderate bore.
He’d sneeze in my face
And then cough just in case
All his germs failed to enter each pore.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Bad Manners, Manners Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Rudeness Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts | 68 Comments »
Saturday, July 16th, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to RJ CLARKEN who wins Limerick of the Week for this very clever verse:
A girl who was lovely and fair
Got a job as a family’s au pair.
She gave birth to a child
of the “Gov”, now reviled.
“He’ll be back” though, so please don’t despair.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Scott Crowder, Johanna Richmond, and Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Scott Crowder:
A gal who was lovely and fair
Had strawberry scent in her hair,
And nice melons to boot,
A real passion fruit,
But now she is shaped like a pear.
Johanna Richmond:
A gal who was lovely and fair
Drew men who felt licensed to stare.
So she carried a sign
That read “My body’s MINE —
Show respect or risk hospital care!”
Brenda Byant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes:
A gal who was lovely and fair
Went around with her top-half all bare.
She was grabbed by police
Who said “This stunt must cease!
You really should grow longer hair.”
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Brenda Bryant, Johanna Richmond, Limerick Of The Week, RJ Clarken, Scott Crowder, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week | 6 Comments »
Sunday, July 10th, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A gal who was lovely and fair…
Here’s mine:
Fair Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal who was lovely and fair
Had a spouse who’d gone heaven knows where.
She suspected foul play.
She’s the victim, I’d say:
An affair in his lair caused her scare.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Affair Limerick, Battle of the Sexes, Cheating Spouse, Crime, Foul Play, Husband Wife Limerick, Infidelity Humor, Marital Relationships, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Contests, Crime & Punishment Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Relationship Humor | 56 Comments »
Sunday, July 10th, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to Madeleine Sara Maddocks who wins Limerick of the Week for this very amusing verse:
A woman who always felt free
Used to hang upside down from a tree.
In the dead of the night
A young boy took a fright.
Now he’s scared to go out for a pee.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Ira Bloom, Victoria Ceretto-Slotto, and Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Ira Bloom:
A fellow who always felt free
Told the government: “Just leave me be!
Tax and regulate? Bub,
Drown yourself in a tub!”
While the rich bastards chortled with glee.
Victoria Ceretto-Slotto:
A woman who always felt free
Burned her bra when she turned twenty-three.
Now at age sixty-eight
She is rueing her fate,
As her boobies keep knocking each knee.
Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith:
A woman who always felt free
To sing any ditty off key
Now finds it great fun
To see co-workers run
when she warbles a plain do re mi.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Ira Bloom, Limerick Of The Week, Madeleine Sara Maddocks, Phyllis Sterling Smith, Victoria Ceretto-Slotto, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limericks | 6 Comments »
Sunday, July 3rd, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. (Just because it’s Independence Day Weekend, doesn’t mean I’m free to ignore my versifying duties.)
So here’s the deal: I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow who always felt free…
or
A woman who always felt free…
Here’s mine:
Freedom Loving Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow who always felt free
To do what he wanted with glee
Applied freedom one way,
Saying “Do what I say,”
To all, so his friend list was wee.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Freedom Humor, Friendship, Independence Day, July 4th, July Holidays, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Contests, Friendship Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts | 55 Comments »
Sunday, July 3rd, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. (This limerick challenge apparently got you all fired up because your submissions were unusually strong.) I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to ALTONIAN who wins Limerick of the Week for this very clever verse:
A fellow was playing with fire
When asked to milk cows in the byre.
He gave a great pull.
‘Twas no cow but a bull.
That’s how you end up in the mire.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Johanna Richmond, David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose, Jane Shelton Hoffman, and Altonian. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Johanna Richmond: (Two Honorable Mentions for Johanna this week)
A woman was playing with fire
When she sought to rekindle desire;
Though she turned up the heat
Sex was strictly Dutch Treat;
Seems her man didn’t like to perspire.
Johanna Richmond:
Old Midas was playing with fire
By insulting the guy on the lyre;
When that guy is Apollo,
Best shut up and follow
Or donkey ears you shall acquire.
David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose:
A fellow was playing with fire
In transferring money by wire
In hundreds of G’s
To a bank in Belize,
Where he secretly hoped to retire.
Jane Shelton Hoffman:
A fellow was playing with fire
And burned down the church in his shire.
When Robin Hood came,
He said, “I’m not to blame!
It must have been your friend, the friar!”
Altonian: (A double win for Altonian too)
A woman was playing with fire
When she thought she was all men’s desire.
She tried vamping one day
With a man who was gay
It was easy for him to deny her.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Altonian, David Lefkovits, Jane Shelton Hoffman, Johanna Richmond, Limerick Of The Week, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limericks | 6 Comments »
Sunday, June 26th, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow was playing with fire…
or
A woman was playing with fire…
Here’s mine:
Fiery Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow was playing with fire
When he called his new boss a big liar.
But he still has his job
Cuz his boss — call him Bob —
Was caught lying and forced to retire.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Boss Humor, Dishonesty, Employment Humor, Fire, Poetry & Prompts, Workplace & Career Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Contests, Honesty Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Workplace & Career Humor | 68 Comments »
Sunday, June 26th, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to BRENDA BRYANT a/k/a Rinkly Rimes who wins Limerick of the Week for this very amusing verse:
A gal who could never say no
Said ‘Come on! Don’t be shy, Romeo!’
She was eager to please
Even on a trapeze!
Which was great for the folk down below!
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Johanna Richmond, Scott Crowder, David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose, and Vivienne Blake. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Johanna Richmond:
A man who could never say no
Frenetically dashed to and fro;
With a mistress and wife
He had double the strife
Kissing two butts – a tough row to hoe.
Scott Crowder:
A man who could never say no
To pork chops and raw cookie dough,
Made me whisper “Oh, Lord,”
When he wobbled on board,
“I hope he don’t sit in my row.”
David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose:
A man who could never say no
To the urges that came from below
Was finally defeated,
When thousands retweeted
His self-composed, solo tableau.
Vivienne Blake:
A gal who could never say no
Married ten at a time, dontcha know.
Polyandry her crime,
She had to do time.
It was worth it, she loved ‘em all so.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Brenda Bryant, David Lefkovits, Johanna Richmond, Limerick Of The Week, Scott Crowder, Vivienne Blake, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limericks | 7 Comments »
Sunday, June 19th, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A man who could never say “no”…
or
A gal who could never say “no”…
Here’s mine:
Generous Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man who could never say “no”
Was warned by his wife to go slow.
“Just what are you thinking?
Our bank account’s shrinking.
Stop giving away all our dough.”
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Battle of the Sexes, Donations Humor, Generosity Humor, Husband Wife Limerick, Money Verse, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts | 46 Comments »
Sunday, June 19th, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to SCOTT CROWDER who wins Limerick of the Week for this very clever verse:
A gal who was proud of her clout,
When fondled would shudder and shout.
And she learned by and by,
It is spelled with an I.
The O and the U are left out.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Bruce Niedt and Ira Bloom. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Bruce Niedt:
A man who was proud of his clout
Brought a bat to the plate, big and stout.
Quite a menacing guy,
When the pitcher let fly—
But whaddya know, he struck out.
Ira Bloom:
A man who was proud of his clout
Nonetheless was consumed by self-doubt
‘Cause his aids quit en masse
Claiming “Newt, you’re an ass.”
All in all, he had little to tout.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Bruce Niedt, Ira Bloom, Limerick Of The Week, Scott Crowder, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limericks | 5 Comments »
Sunday, June 12th, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A man who was proud of his clout…
or
A gal who was proud of her clout…
Here’s mine:
A Limerick With Clout
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man who was proud of his clout
And had nary a hint of self-doubt
Became cocky and lewd
And carelessly crude.
As for power, he now has a drought.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Clout Humor, Crude Limerick, Lewd Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Power Verse, Self-Doubt, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts | 61 Comments »
Sunday, June 12th, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. Competition was extra strong this week, and I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to VERSEBENDER who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:
A fellow who loved fine cuisine
Had a spread in a big magazine.
But the shoot turned out lewd
‘Cause he cooked in the nude.
Some utensils are best left unseen.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Lynette Killam, Lewis Evans, David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose, Johanna Richmond, and Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Lynette Killam:
A woman who loved fine cuisine
Gave up struggling to keep herself lean.
She finally said,
“I’ll be thin when I’m dead…
I’d much rather be chubby than mean!”
Lewis Evans:
A fellow who loved fine cuisine
Was a cereal killing machine.
His obsession with grits
Rendered turbo-charged shits,
Wasting all who passed by his latrine.
David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose:
A fellow who loved fine cuisine
While camping with mujahedeen
Would freshly bake scones
While running from drones
And filling up flasks with benzene.
Johanna Richmond:
A fellow who loved fine cuisine
When served subpar supper, got mean;
His waitress, fed up,
Snarled, “Go elsewhere to sup;
Sir, our liver don’t merit your spleen!”
Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith:
A fellow who loved fine cuisine
When tipping was stingy and mean.
“My custom is still
Two percent of the bill.”
The spit in his soup went unseen.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: David Lefkovits, Johanna Richmond, Lewis Evans, Limerick Of The Week, Lynette Killam, Phyllis Sterling Smith, VerseBender, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limericks | 6 Comments »
Sunday, June 5th, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow who loved fine cuisine…
or
A woman who loved fine cuisine…
Here’s mine:
Gourmet Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow who loved fine cuisine
Thought non-gourmet dining obscene.
But he could not afford
The food he adored,
Which explains why that guy was so lean.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Dining Humor, Eating Limerick, Food Verse, Gourmet Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Contests, Food & Drink Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts | 64 Comments »
Sunday, June 5th, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the four Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to DAISY MAE SIMON who wins Limerick of the Week for this amusingly clever two-verse limerick:
A fellow was in a bad mood
When his girlfriend, he learned, was a prude.
As he tried to seduce her
She said “That’s ABUSE, sir!
Stop letting your penis protrude!”
Second thoughts changed her mind and her mood.
She’d really not meant to be rude.
After all, he was cute.
He had quite a salute.
But too late, he’d been verbally screwed.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes, VerseBender, Elaine Spall, and Martin T. Hodges. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes:
A fellow was in a bad mood;
He had swallowed a fly with his food.
As he coughed and he spluttered
Those nearest him muttered
“Those noises are terribly rude!”
VerseBender:
A fellow was in a bad mood
As he lay there distraught in the nude.
Other women had said
He was worthless in bed,
But this was the first time one booed.
Elaine Spall:
A woman was in a bad mood
Cause she couldn’t stop thinking of food.
Then she said “Better try it…
This new sticky diet…”
And painfully had her lips glued.
Martin T. Hodges:
A fellow was in a bad mood
After seeing himself in the nude.
He was down in the mouth
As his eyes travelled south
Where the length of his age could be viewed.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Brenda Bryant, Daisy Mae Simon, Elaine Spall, Limerick Of The Week, Martin T. Hodges, VerseBender, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limericks | 9 Comments »
Sunday, May 29th, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here are two excellent resources: OEDILF on Writing A Limerick and Speedy Snail’s Limerick Rhythm and Meter.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow was in a bad mood…
or
A woman was in a bad mood…
Here’s mine:
Moody Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow was in a bad mood
Cuz he’d just been informed he’d been sued.
He’d posted online
A libelous whine
And would soon be a very poor dude.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Defamation, Law Humor, Litigation Poem, Money Verse, Mood Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Contests, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts | 77 Comments »
Sunday, May 29th, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and four Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to PATRICK MCGUIRE who wins Limerick of the Week for this charming verse:
A fellow went out on a date
And proudly showed off his best trait.
The woman was awed
And loud did applaud,
But now she complains that she’s late.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) VerseBender, Catherine Palmer, Steve Vitoff, and David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
VerseBender:
A fellow went out on a date,
But found himself deep in debate.
You want to get kissed
Instead of dismissed?
Leave politics at the front gate.
Catherine Palmer:
A woman went out on a date
With a fellow who made her irate.
He showed up at her door
Like a john for his whore
And proceeded to ask for her rate.
Steve Vitoff:
A woman went out on a date.
But her date she began to berate.
She’d freak when he’d speak
And critique his physique.
Rest assured, they did not conjugate.
David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose:
A woman went out on a date.
That started and ended at eight:
“His chiseled physique
Would render me weak,
So I’m leaving before it’s too late.”
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Catherine Palmer, David Lefkovits, Limerick Of The Week, Patrick McGuire, Steve Vitoff, VerseBender, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week | 7 Comments »
Sunday, May 22nd, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here are two excellent resources: OEDILF on Writing A Limerick and Speedy Snail’s Limerick Rhythm and Meter.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A woman went out on a date…
or
A fellow went out on a date…
Here’s mine:
Dated Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman went out on a date
With a man who was easy to hate.
So why did she go?
He had plenty of dough
And was ancient and soon would be late.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Dating Limerick, Money Verse, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Contests, Dating Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts | 62 Comments »
Sunday, May 22nd, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and five Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to JOHANNA RICHMOND who wins Limerick of the Week for this witty and timely verse:
A fellow was hatching a plot
(Cruel, evil, corrupt, dot, dot, dot);
But for once folks cried out,
Even Newt voiced his doubt;
Paul, your vouchers aint worth diddly-squat.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith, Victoria Ceretto-Slotto, Earlybird, David Lefkovits a/k/a Mr. Goose, and Matty. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith:
A fellow was hatching a plot
To tutor his parrot a lot.
She not only could squawk.
In nine tongues she could talk.
She’s known as a true Polly-glot.
Victoria Ceretto-Slotto:
A fellow was hatching a plot
Involving his girlfriend named Dot.
He’d take her to Reno
and make a bambino.
Then she’d have to agree: “Tie the knot!”
Earlybird:
A woman was hatching a plot
To pepper her man with lead shot.
She thought she’d have fun
With a sawn-off shot gun,
Then boil his remains in a pot.
David Lefkovits a/k/a Dr. Goose:
A woman was hatching a plot
For seducing a boy who was hot:
“I’ll have him, me thinks,
After plying with drinks
At some out-of-the-way little boîte.”
Matty:
A woman was hatching a plot
To marry a man who was hot.
When she offered a lay,
The gent walked away.
A beautiful gal she was not.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: David Lefkovits, Earlybird, Johanna Richmond, Limerick Of The Week, Matty, Phyllis Sterling Smith, Victoria Ceretto-Slotto, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week | 11 Comments »
Sunday, May 15th, 2011
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here are two excellent resources: OEDILF on Writing A Limerick and Speedy Snail’s Limerick Rhythm and Meter.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow was hatching a plot…
or
A woman was hatching a plot…
Here’s mine:
Limerick Plot
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow was hatching a plot
To kidnap a rich fam’ly’s tot.
But the germ-fearing man
Abandoned his plan.
Seems the youngster was rescued by snot.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!
Tags: Children Limerick, Crime, Germaphobe Humor, Kidnapping, Plots, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Crime & Punishment Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts | 65 Comments »
Sunday, May 15th, 2011
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and two Honorable Mentions:
Congratulations to Earlybird who wins Limerick of the Week for this amusing verse:
A gal thought it time to take stock
When once, on omitting to knock,
She turned on the lights,
Found her man dressed in tights
And struggling to do up a frock.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Guy Peter Pietrobono and Victoria Ceretto-Slotto. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
Guy Peter Pietrobono:
A gal thought it time to take stock
Of her odd biological clock:
“With 12 kids today,
Plus 3 on the way,
These birth-control pills are a crock!”
Victoria Ceretto-Slotto:
A gal thought it time to take stock ––
Her love life was truly a crock:
She trusted her honey
Who fled with her money,
Betrayal that left her in shock.
She hired a lawyer to sue
And see that the creep got his due.
When she saw him in court,
He admitted his tort.
She said “Tough, it’s all over. We’re through.”
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
Tags: Earlybird, Guy Peter Pietrobono, Limerick Of The Week, Victoria Ceretto-Slotto, Writing Competitions, Writing Contest
Posted in Contests, Limerick Award Winners, Limerick Of The Week, Limericks | 11 Comments »
