Archive for the ‘Political Limericks’ Category

What’s Next For Steve Bannon? A Modest Proposal

Tuesday, January 9th, 2018

Steve Bannon from Breitbart’s been banned;
By the no-mercy Mercers, unmanned.
What’s next for that slob —
Donald’s ex-fav’rite blob?
Does the KKK’s Duke need a hand?

Trump’s Now and Future Limericks

Tuesday, January 9th, 2018

You probably know that Trump’s chimed in on the “Oprah presidential run” conversation. But did you also know that Trump’s already composed two Oprah limericks — one for this year and one for 2020?

Fortunately for my readers, I managed to get hold of the only copy:

Trump’s 2018 Limerick:

Though Oprah’s unlikely to run,
I’ll beat her and have lots of fun.
I know her real well
And I think that she’s swell,
But she’ll surely be YUUUGELY outdone.

Trump’s 2020 Limerick:

Dopey Oprah is sorry she ran.
Being prez is a job for a man.
And besides, it’s not clear
She was even born here.
She’s a mopey old flash in the pan.

Ode To Donald “Genius” Trump

Sunday, January 7th, 2018

Dear Donald, when people are smart,
And their genius is way off the chart,
They do NOT have to brag
And make ev’ryone gag,
Cuz their brains shine as bright as Descartes.

Trump Versifies (Limerick)

Saturday, January 6th, 2018

How dare the Dems say I’m a bum,
And lazy and crazy and dumb!
I am really, like, smart,
Stable genius with heart.
No collusion! No puppet! They’re scum!

Donald “Little Rocket” Trump (Limerick)

Wednesday, January 3rd, 2018

Donald’s “button’s” enormous, he brags,
As his linkage to sanity lags.
And the man whom he taunts
Is a madman who vaunts
His nuke power. Two loons, so hope flags.

Bannon v. Trump (Quatrain)

Wednesday, January 3rd, 2018

Bannon skewers Trump,
and Trump torches Bannon.
Both are bound for hell,
whose flames they are fannin’.

Trump’s “Deep State” Blues (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 2nd, 2018

Dear Trump, from the Oval you rue
And berate “the Deep State” with ado.
But you’re outside no more;
You’re an insider whore!
L’état, my dear Donald, c’est vous.

Trump On The Attack

Tuesday, December 26th, 2017

Trump’s attacking his OWN FBI.
And no one should have to ask why:
After decades of sinning,
Capped off by some winning,
His Reckoning Day appears nigh.

Greed Trumps All (Limerick)

Saturday, December 16th, 2017

Headline: “Donald Trump And GOP Leaders Could Be Enriched By Last Minute Tax Break Inserted Into Final Bill”

Corker’s tax “reform” “yes”-vote’s a blow!
So why did he switch it from “no?”
Mega real estate owners
(Like Corker) got boners
From a tax break that’s worth mega dough.

The Great Tax “Reform” Con (Limerick)

Saturday, December 16th, 2017

The tax “reform” process was stealthy,
And its impact’s acutely unhealthy.
The damage is clear;
We’ll lose ALL we hold dear,
As the rich become even more wealthy.

More BS From Moore (Limerick)

Saturday, December 16th, 2017

Headline: “Roy Moore: ‘Battle Is Not Over’ in Senate Race”

The battle’s not over, says Moore.
All your calls to concede, I’ll ignore
The election was flawed.
I’m sure there was fraud.
So send money. Keep funding my war.

Who Needs Qualified Judges? (Limerick)

Sunday, December 10th, 2017

My latest limerick was inspired by this Politico headline: “Republicans step up defense of ‘not qualified’ judicial nominees.”

“Unqualified” judges? Who cares!?!
If the nominee’s attitude squares
With Republican stances,
Trump’s Court-choice advances.
He’s OUR guy, so NO splitting hairs!

Demented Trump (Limerick)

Friday, December 1st, 2017

While speaking, Trump zigzags alarmingly,
Though supporters might swear that it’s “charmingly.”
Is his brain missing sprockets?
’Tween topics he rockets:
Taxes, Kim, taxes, Kim — NOT disarmingly!

Here’s the Trump quote I’m referring to:

“Because these massive tax cuts will be rocket fuel … little rocket man, rocket fuel for the American economy. He is a sick puppy.”

Limerick Ode To A Madman

Wednesday, November 29th, 2017

From a New York Daily News Editorial Headline: “Donald Trump is a Madman…”

Face the truth: “Donald Trump is a Madman.”
He’s a cad, I would add, and a bad man.
He deserves to be sacked.
Stop denying this fact:
The Emperor Trump is unclad, man!

Limerick Ode To Roy Moore Sycophant, Pastor Flip Benham

Tuesday, November 21st, 2017

Headline: “Pastor Says Moore Dated Teenagers for Their ‘Purity’”

A flip pastor says Moore dated teens
For their “purity.” I don’t know beans
About biblical teaching,
But what sort of preaching
Overlooks what indecency means?

GOP Pols Only Have Themselves To Blame (Limerick)

Friday, November 17th, 2017

PoliticalWire Headline: “The Conservative War on the Media Backfires”

Republican pols have been training
Their voters, through lie-packed complaining,
To reject any news
That might challenge their views–
A great aid to Moore’s Senate campaigning.

Who Ya Gonna Believe? (Limerick)

Saturday, November 11th, 2017

Russia meddled, our experts maintain;
Our Democracy’s suffered a stain.
But Donald would rather
Buy Putin’s false blather;
Trump’s owned by Vlad’s hard driving reign.

A Limerick For New York’s Mayor

Monday, November 6th, 2017

Bill de Blasio’s reign has been poor,
And I’m desp’rate to show him the door.
But the others are worse,
So it seems (with a curse)
I’ll vote “Bill,” but won’t say “Je l’adore.”

Limerick Ode To Trump’s Braggadocio

Sunday, November 5th, 2017

Says Donald, “I’ve always been great
With money.” My mem’ry’s first-rate.
My IQ’s through the roof.
What? You’re asking for proof?
I am PREZ, and you’re NOT. End debate!

Open Limerick To NRA Shills

Sunday, November 5th, 2017

Dear NRA shills, ev’ry prayer
And each thought that you send’s just hot air.
Let us know when you’ll draw
Up a gun control law.
Until then, stop pretending you care.