When I shovel, I try to obey
The best shoveling way, which they say
Involves using one’s thighs.
So it’s not a surprise
That our staircase is daunting today.
Archive for the ‘Seasons Humor’ Category
Shoveling Post (Muscle) Mortem
Sunday, January 24th, 2016Not That I’m Complaining, But… (Limerick)
Thursday, December 24th, 2015I’m not writing a climate-change screed,
But I’d wager most folks would concede
This is crazy as heck:
Icy drinks on our deck,
Late December, New York. Coat? No need!
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: LIES or BELIES or RELIES at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5
Saturday, December 12th, 2015It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using LIES or BELIES or RELIES at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write a themed limerick related to any December holiday, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best holiday-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick-Off Award Winner on December 27, 2015, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, December 26, 2015, at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
The weatherman forecast clear skies.
But I wasn’t surprised by the cries
And the shrieks and the bawling
When rain started falling;
I’ve weathered the weather guys’ lies.
Please feel free to write your own limerick(s) using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
It’s Raining Acrostic Limericks
Wednesday, October 28th, 2015Rather wet is the weather today.
Also terribly gloomy, I’d say.
It’s so nasty, I’m glad
Not to need something bad.
You can bet from my house I won’t stray.
Not Mad About The Weather (Limerick)
Tuesday, August 4th, 2015Not Mad About The Weather (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Each summer I bitch about heat.
Humidity too makes me bleat.
But the current one’s better
Than most — wore a sweater
One night, which beats sweat indiscreet.
(DVerse Poets wants weather about the dog days of summer.)
Yet Another Anti-Winter Poem
Friday, March 20th, 2015Yet Another Anti-Winter Poem
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Oh damn you winter! Go away!
Why can’t you take a hint today?
Intruding on our spring delights
With snow is NOT within your rights.
The calendar has made it clear
It’s spring. So why are YOU still here?
I’ve foolishly already stored
Our boots and shovels, long abhorred.
I’m forced to fetch them one more time
For duties not at all sublime.
Your crime of trespass? No mere gaffe!
I just might sue on spring’s behalf.
Windy St. Patrick’s Day Limerick
Tuesday, March 17th, 2015Windy St. Patrick’s Day Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Thinking Jack Frost had split, we high-fived.
But our basking in warmth was short-lived.
Winter managed to con us–
Cold wind is upon us–
A low blow as St. Pat’s Day arrived.
(More wind poetry here.)
Staten Island Chuck the Groundhog Lives (Limerick)
Monday, February 2nd, 2015There’s been a Groundhog Day rules change at the Staten Island Zoo, in the wake of last year’s groundhog death at the klutzy hands of Mayor Bill de Blasio:
Staten Island Chuck the Groundhog Lives (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Seems the zoos of New York had their fill
Of Mayor-caused Groundhog Day-kill.
Last year’s groundhog is dead,
So “no holding,” they said.
“We are Chucking your touching rights, Bill.”
Wintry Woes (Limerick)
Monday, February 2nd, 2015Wintry Woes (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I so wish all these snow storms would wane.
I’d prefer their replacement with rain–
Even better, with drizzle–
A limited mizzle.
Cuz this winter has gone down the drain.
Shoveling Duty (Limerick)
Monday, January 26th, 2015Shoveling Duty (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It’s snowing, alas and alack,
And I just finished shov’ling — can’t slack
During storms this severe.
But I did it. Oh dear!
All the snow I removed has come back.
*****
Blizzard in progress.
I resent New York City
resembling Fargo.
*****
Oboe-playing years
armed my shoulders for shov’ling,
but failed to prep mind.
I Knew It Couldn’t Last (Limerick)
Wednesday, September 3rd, 2014This summer’s weather in New York City, especially August, has been astonishingly pleasant. And then September hit.
I Knew It Couldn’t Last (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I was right with my weather suspicions;
We’ve reverted to dreadful conditions.
High humidity, heat,
Heavy T-storms compete,
As we weather their juxtapositions.
Weather Wariness (Limerick)
Monday, July 21st, 2014Weather Wariness (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
New York’s weather, right now, is delicious.
Its loveliness makes me suspicious:
Are we being set up
For a fall? I fear yup,
We are in for some elements vicious.
Limerick Ode To A Stormy Independence Day
Friday, July 4th, 2014Limerick Ode To A Stormy Independence Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The East Coast, alas, is awash
With Hurricane Arthurly slosh,
Bringing wind gusts and rain
And flooding — the bane
Of saluting the 4th with panache.
Limerick Ode To AC
Thursday, July 3rd, 2014Today is the first day of Air Conditioning Appreciation days. (July 3 to August 15)
Limerick Ode To AC
By Madeleine Begun Kane
How I long to be sweaty-skin-free.
“Make it cool!” is my summertime plea.
Humidity, heat
Make me drip with defeat.
Yes indeed, I’m a fan of AC.
My Unreasonable Complaint (Limerick)
Sunday, June 22nd, 2014My Unreasonable Complaint (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I’m not hot. There’s no sweat on my brow.
I’m not cold. Yes, I’m forced to allow
That the last sev’ral days
Have had moderate rays.
So what will I bitch about now?
Sunny Limerick
Tuesday, May 27th, 2014Sunny Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I confess that I’m really not one
To use sunscreen, but please don’t make fun.
My skin’s still protected;
The scheme I’ve selected
Is hide and stay out of the sun.
Happy Sun Screen Day! (May 27)
UPDATE: “Don’t Fry Day” falls on the Friday before Memorial Day.
Weather Report (Limerick)
Friday, May 9th, 2014Weather Report (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It’s springtime — a lovely May day;
Perfect temps, fragrant breeze from the bay.
Don’t be jealous or curse,
Cuz I’ve seasoned this verse
With deceit. It is cold, damp, and gray.
An Eclipsed Eclipse (Limerick)
Tuesday, April 15th, 2014An Eclipsed Eclipse (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Last night, I kept searching the skies
For that promised “blood moon,” but my eyes
Were betrayed by the pall
Cast by clouds — a thick wall,
Which cut my dream view down to size.
Open Limerick To My Southern Hemisphere Friends
Thursday, March 20th, 2014Open Limerick To My Southern Hemisphere Friends
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Don’t be mad, if it’s fall where you are.
(My friends are from near and from far.)
I can’t help blow my cork
Over spring in New York,
Which (so far) appears way under par.
Springtime Blues
Thursday, March 20th, 2014Springtime Blues
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It’s the first day of spring — so they claim,
And I’m searching for someone to blame,
Cuz we’re still in the throes
Of winter, which chose
To give springtime a very bad name.
