Trump is mad at John Kelly. Here’s why:
Re the Donald’s campaign, he let fly
Quite a wall-vow affront;
It’s surprisingly blunt.
“Uninformed,” though, sounds better than “lie.”
Archive for the ‘GOP Humor’ Category
Trump v. Kelly (Limerick)
Thursday, January 18th, 2018Trump Aced The Test? (Limerick)
Wednesday, January 17th, 2018Donald brags about doing “the best”
On the MoCA exam. You impressed?
This raises to mind
Just one question, I find:
Could a houseplant fare well on that test?
Open Limerick To Donald Trump
Saturday, January 13th, 2018Dear Donald, your work ethic’s poor;
You’re a lazy-ass bum to your core.
But the harm’s so widespread
When you DO work, instead…
Kindly loaf and go golfing much more.
Trump’s Now and Future Limericks
Tuesday, January 9th, 2018You probably know that Trump’s chimed in on the “Oprah presidential run” conversation. But did you also know that Trump’s already composed two Oprah limericks — one for this year and one for 2020?
Fortunately for my readers, I managed to get hold of the only copy:
Trump’s 2018 Limerick:
Though Oprah’s unlikely to run,
I’ll beat her and have lots of fun.
I know her real well
And I think that she’s swell,
But she’ll surely be YUUUGELY outdone.
Trump’s 2020 Limerick:
Dopey Oprah is sorry she ran.
Being prez is a job for a man.
And besides, it’s not clear
She was even born here.
She’s a mopey old flash in the pan.
Ode To Donald “Genius” Trump
Sunday, January 7th, 2018Dear Donald, when people are smart,
And their genius is way off the chart,
They do NOT have to brag
And make ev’ryone gag,
Cuz their brains shine as bright as Descartes.
Trump Versifies (Limerick)
Saturday, January 6th, 2018How dare the Dems say I’m a bum,
And lazy and crazy and dumb!
I am really, like, smart,
Stable genius with heart.
No collusion! No puppet! They’re scum!
Donald “Little Rocket” Trump (Limerick)
Wednesday, January 3rd, 2018Donald’s “button’s” enormous, he brags,
As his linkage to sanity lags.
And the man whom he taunts
Is a madman who vaunts
His nuke power. Two loons, so hope flags.
Bannon v. Trump (Quatrain)
Wednesday, January 3rd, 2018Bannon skewers Trump,
and Trump torches Bannon.
Both are bound for hell,
whose flames they are fannin’.
Trump’s “Deep State” Blues (Limerick)
Tuesday, January 2nd, 2018Dear Trump, from the Oval you rue
And berate “the Deep State” with ado.
But you’re outside no more;
You’re an insider whore!
L’état, my dear Donald, c’est vous.
Trump On The Attack
Tuesday, December 26th, 2017Trump’s attacking his OWN FBI.
And no one should have to ask why:
After decades of sinning,
Capped off by some winning,
His Reckoning Day appears nigh.
Greed Trumps All (Limerick)
Saturday, December 16th, 2017Headline: “Donald Trump And GOP Leaders Could Be Enriched By Last Minute Tax Break Inserted Into Final Bill”
Corker’s tax “reform” “yes”-vote’s a blow!
So why did he switch it from “no?”
Mega real estate owners
(Like Corker) got boners
From a tax break that’s worth mega dough.
The Great Tax “Reform” Con (Limerick)
Saturday, December 16th, 2017The tax “reform” process was stealthy,
And its impact’s acutely unhealthy.
The damage is clear;
We’ll lose ALL we hold dear,
As the rich become even more wealthy.
More BS From Moore (Limerick)
Saturday, December 16th, 2017Headline: “Roy Moore: ‘Battle Is Not Over’ in Senate Race”
The battle’s not over, says Moore.
All your calls to concede, I’ll ignore
The election was flawed.
I’m sure there was fraud.
So send money. Keep funding my war.
Demented Trump (Limerick)
Friday, December 1st, 2017While speaking, Trump zigzags alarmingly,
Though supporters might swear that it’s “charmingly.”
Is his brain missing sprockets?
’Tween topics he rockets:
Taxes, Kim, taxes, Kim — NOT disarmingly!
Here’s the Trump quote I’m referring to:
“Because these massive tax cuts will be rocket fuel … little rocket man, rocket fuel for the American economy. He is a sick puppy.”
Limerick Ode To A Madman
Wednesday, November 29th, 2017From a New York Daily News Editorial Headline: “Donald Trump is a Madman…”
Face the truth: “Donald Trump is a Madman.”
He’s a cad, I would add, and a bad man.
He deserves to be sacked.
Stop denying this fact:
The Emperor Trump is unclad, man!
Limerick Ode To Roy Moore Sycophant, Pastor Flip Benham
Tuesday, November 21st, 2017Headline: “Pastor Says Moore Dated Teenagers for Their ‘Purity’”
A flip pastor says Moore dated teens
For their “purity.” I don’t know beans
About biblical teaching,
But what sort of preaching
Overlooks what indecency means?
GOP Pols Only Have Themselves To Blame (Limerick)
Friday, November 17th, 2017PoliticalWire Headline: “The Conservative War on the Media Backfires”
Republican pols have been training
Their voters, through lie-packed complaining,
To reject any news
That might challenge their views–
A great aid to Moore’s Senate campaigning.
Who Ya Gonna Believe? (Limerick)
Saturday, November 11th, 2017Russia meddled, our experts maintain;
Our Democracy’s suffered a stain.
But Donald would rather
Buy Putin’s false blather;
Trump’s owned by Vlad’s hard driving reign.
