Posts Tagged ‘Gun Humor’

Gunning For Trouble? (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 28th, 2024

“At the moment we met, I was charmed.
But my mood swiftly moved to alarmed
When my date turned irate
Without cause, while she ate,
As she brandished hard proof she was armed.”

The Charmer (Limerick)

Monday, June 5th, 2023

A woman who’s bubbly and charming,
With a manner that’s outright disarming,
Will never take guff.
She’s surprisingly tough
And her bearing, when armed, is alarming.

Hotheaded Hugh (Limerick)

Wednesday, August 31st, 2022

Since Wordsmith’s “Word of the Day” today is “Hotheaded,” I decided to use it in a limerick:

A hotheaded fellow named Hugh
Was irked by a huge check-out queue.
To disperse the long line
He yelled “Gun!” — the damn swine.
He wears stripes now; “lines” up the wazoo!

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: SOLE or SOUL at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: July 4, 2020 at 4 p.m. Eastern)

Saturday, June 20th, 2020

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SOLE or SOUL at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to WEAPONS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best WEAPON-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on July 5, 2020, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, July 4, 2020 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my SOLE/SOUL-rhyme limerick:

When I ordered a French Dover sole,
My fish-dish arrived in a bowl.
“What’s THIS? Why no PLATE?”
I shouted, irate.
(My new rating is “Dinnerware Troll.”)

And here’s my WEAPONS-themed limerick:

What’s my weapon of choice? It is words.
Guns and rifles and knives? For the birds!
Kill or maim? Not my aim.
(Please don’t make me shoot game!)
I’m just one of those bookwormy nerds.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Heated Limerick

Wednesday, May 21st, 2014

Heated Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Chipotle says no packing heat
When you come to their rest’rants to eat.
This makes sense, cuz their food’s
Hot enough. Gals and dudes
Should save gunplay for home and the street.

Undone Limerick — 3rd Anniversary Edition (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, March 16th, 2014

A few minutes ago, I announced the 156th Limerick of the Week. And that means it’s anniversary time at Mad Kane’s Limerick-Offs.

The Limerick of the Week Awards started as an experiment three years ago in March 2011. Of course, I had been informally posting limerick prompts for years before that. But it was on March 13, 2011 that I decided to get organized and start picking weekly winners. Here’s what I wrote.

But I’m trying something a bit different this time: One of your limericks will be anointed Limerick Of The Week.

As you can see, my experiment took. So congratulations to all of you and thanks so much for helping to make this limerick competition such a success.

In light of our 3rd Limerick of the Week Anniversary, I’m offering you an alternative: In addition to your regular challenge, you may write a limerick related to SPRING, using any first line. Next week I’ll present an extra award — one for the best spring-related limerick.

And now, getting back to the business at hand, it’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A woman was feeling undone…*

or

A fellow announced, “We are done…”*

or

A creditor threatened to dun…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Undone Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A would-be inventor’s undone
When told to go back to square one;
His whole concept shot down
By each bank with a frown—
No bucks for his edible gun!

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!