Posts Tagged ‘Crime Humor’

Voting-Fraudster-In-Chief (Limerick)

Thursday, September 3rd, 2020

Headline: “Trump Committed Felony Urging Supporters to Vote Twice”

Donald Trump told supporters: “Vote twice,”
Which is awful, unlawful advice.
His words aren’t just flawed;
He’s encouraging fraud.
Yet another Trump crime with no price.

Donald’s “She’s Not My Type” Defense (Limerick)

Tuesday, June 25th, 2019

Headline: “Trump’s repeated defense against assault accusations: call the accuser unattractive”

Donald’s message: I’m very selective
When viewing a victim, prospective,
So her rape claim’s a lie,
And it’s obvious why:
She isn’t “my type!” She’s defective!

“Otherwise Blameless?” (Quatrain)

Saturday, March 9th, 2019

Headline: “How could anyone think Paul Manafort lived an ‘otherwise blameless’ life?”

NOT a limerick:

Judge Ellis while sentencing Paul
Said his life has been “otherwise blameless.”
But that claim just ain’t true. Not at all!
Seems both Paul and Judge Ellis are shameless.

“Smocking Gun” Mockery (Limerick)

Monday, December 10th, 2018

From a Trump tweet today: “No Smocking Gun…No Collusion.”

Donald tweets about guns that ain’t “smocking,”
Which occasions a whole lot of mocking.
Poor Trump’s in a bind,
For soon he will find
Much bad news and “clean” coal in his stocking.

Trump: “Witness Tamperer In Chief” (Limerick)

Monday, December 3rd, 2018

Headline: “Kellyanne Conway’s Husband Accuses Trump of Witness Tampering”

Donald’s latest illegal pursuit:
Witness tamp’ring on Twitter. The coot
Injudiciously hurts
His case; his tweet-blurts
Furnish proof Trump can never refute.

Trump Must Pay! (Limerick)

Monday, November 26th, 2018

For his crimes and his wrongs, Trump must pay.
It’s essential! We should not delay,
Else the normalization
Of crass aberration
Shall forever remain on display.

Leading By Example (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 23rd, 2018

Headline: “Man Cites Trump After Groping Woman on Flight”

Trump’s impact is rather immense,
And it often defies common sense.
Grope a gal sans permission?
No need for contrition;
Just rely on the “Donald Defense!”

The “What’s The Big Deal?” Defense (Limerick)

Wednesday, August 22nd, 2018

Trump’s personal lawyer’s confessed
To committing at Donald’s behest
And direction some crimes,
While his party-mate slimes
Are pretending to be unimpressed.

A Discordant Note (Limerick)

Saturday, June 30th, 2018

Some look at our system with awe,
But the man who keeps breaking the law
Gets to help load the court
With wingnuts who’ll thwart
Donald’s punishment. Rather a flaw!

Trump’s Bravery Claims Are All Wet (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 27th, 2018

The Donald’s a cowardly fella,
Who has bravery fantasies stella.
He’d save kids, he’ll maintain,
Though (I guess) not from rain:
Watch him hogging his big-ass umbrella.

Our Brave Oval Knave (Limerick)

Monday, February 26th, 2018

This CNN headline cries out for a limerick: “Trump on Florida shooting: ‘I really believe I’d run in there, even if I didn’t have a weapon'”

Dear Donald: How lovely to know
That you’d bravely and willingly go
T’wards a gunman to save
High school students! You knave,
How’re those bone spurs of yours? What a schmo!

Open Limerick To NRA TOOLS

Thursday, February 22nd, 2018

Dear NRA lovers and tools:
“Armed teachers protecting our schools?”
This insults the police
Who FULL-TIME keep the peace.
Sniper skills ain’t a hobby, you fools!

A Prison Awaits Him (Limerick)

Saturday, January 27th, 2018

Trump tried to dump Mueller and failed —
Yet another obstruction unveiled.
How much proof will it take
Till his allies foresake
Him, and Donald is finally jailed?

Dear Donald: Soliciting Campaign Donations From Foreign Government Officials Is Illegal (Limerick)

Friday, July 1st, 2016

It’s illegal and terribly brash
To ask foreign officials for cash
For your U.S. prez run.
That’s what Donald has done.
Will he pay any price? Balderdash!