Frazzled Limerick Limerick Audio

Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A frazzled new father named Jim…

Here’s mine:

Frazzled Limerick (Frazzled Limerick Audio)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A frazzled new father named Jim
Bought his baby toy trains on a whim.
When his wife saw the gift,
She was terribly miffed,
So she yelled, “That’s for you. What’s for him?”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

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Update: May 2 is Baby Day.

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19 Responses to “Frazzled Limerick Limerick Audio

  1. Daisy Mae says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    Was expecting a ‘her,’ not a ‘him’
    But when baby came out
    With a special male spout
    ‘Twas clear they could not name it ‘Mim’

  2. Anne says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    Noticed his wife had gotten less trim
    He felt real betrayed
    Cuz he wanted to get laid
    Without out waiting for her to get back from the gym.

  3. jesse levy says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    Had married Lulu – a bim
    They had this here kid
    But the Dad’s feelings slid
    Cause it sure didn’t look much like him.

  4. Ryan says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    He took his young son for a swim
    As he jumped in the pool
    He looked like a fool
    As his kid breaststroked right past him

  5. A frazzled new father named Jim
    Is pretty much out on a limb
    He changed his tot’s diaper
    But neglected to wipe her
    Now that’s one stinky gross seraphim

  6. Audrey Regan says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    Was worn out and feeling so grim
    With no time for eating
    His health took a beating
    His friends are now calling him Slim

    His wife is the happy breadwinner
    In love with her job at McZinner
    She yells “honey I’m home”
    Plays with baby Jerome
    While poor frazzled Jim makes her dinner

  7. madkane says:

    What fun limericks! Please keep them coming. Thanks!

  8. Josette says:

    A frazzeled new father named Jim
    Left town with police after him
    He ran with a start
    Breaking sweet mommies heart
    Not thinking he had committed a sin

    He dodged the police on the run
    While running he had him some fun
    The father was found
    tied up and quite bound
    With mommy beating “the crap” out of him.

  9. Audrey Regan says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    Decked out in a hat with a brim
    Rode up to the wrong floor
    Raced into Room 54
    And shocked an old patient named Tim

    The old senile geezer screamed “MOSES
    Some stranger just bluntly imposes!”
    Jim stammered and muttered
    And nervously stuttered
    “H-here I br-brought you some roses”

  10. scott says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim,
    Is backwards and really quite dim.
    He diapers his pet,
    Takes his kid to the vet,
    And puts on his clothes for a swim

  11. Neal P says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    was losing his vigor and vim
    he’d keep a dry eye on
    his unruly scion
    but ended up wetter than him

    [if you’ve done the 2 a.m. changing — you know]

  12. Brion Emde says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    Had diapers right up to his brim
    In air that was stinky
    He poked with his pinky
    He did not know poop was so grim

  13. Marie York says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim,
    had a son not yet diapered by him.
    When Mom had gone out,
    he just gave a shout…
    to “grandma”, but, she was not dim….

    Grandma explained to dear “Dad”,
    that results could often be had,
    when little ones are dry,
    ” ’cause they probably won’t cry…
    All that poop then won’t seem very bad!”

  14. Dr. Goose says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    Favored lullabies proper and prim;
    While cradling gently,
    He’d pucker intently
    And whistle a Methodist hymn.

  15. Marie York says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim,
    was trying to stay fit and trim.
    He ran ’round the block
    with the baby in her frock
    and a stroller that could keep up with him.

    The neighbor kids gave him the chase
    to see if the baby named “Grace”
    would cough up her chow
    if they stopped him awhile
    and momentum throws milk in his face.

  16. Audrey Regan says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim
    Fell down on the ice, broke a limb
    Now he’s strapped to a board
    In a hospital ward
    While the nurses make fun of him

    Soon the morphine and gravol will pass
    Through his veins bye-bye pain bye-bye gas
    Yet he stares at the ceiling
    How embarrassed he’s feeling
    That he slipped and fell flat on his ass

  17. madkane says:

    Oh good! Lots more fun limericks! Thanks, and please keep them coming!

  18. Edward says:

    A frazzled new father named Jim,
    Was sapped of his vigor and vim.
    He had himself snipped
    Because he was whipped
    And feared another babe might do him in.

  19. Lisa Nash says:

    I love these limericks! I think that anything that can introduce some humor into parenting is a great thing. Thanks so much for bringing a smile to this mom’s day ;D