Posts Tagged ‘Justice Antonin Scalia’

Clarence Thomas Speaks (Limerick)

Tuesday, March 1st, 2016

CNN 2/29/16 Headline: “Justice Clarence Thomas breaks 10-year streak, asks question in court.” (The issue before the court was whether a domestic assault conviction based on reckless conduct qualifies as a misdemeanor crime of domestic violence that would block firearm possession.)

Clarence Thomas can talk, after all;
Once famed for a decade-long haul
Of no-questions-in-court,
Now that Nino is mort,
He is having a gun-query ball.

Scalia (Song Parody To Leonard Bernstein’s Maria, from West Side Story)

Monday, July 6th, 2015

Though I already wrote an Antonin Scalia limerick today, I’m itching for more. So I composed these song parody lyrics to the tune of “Maria.”

Now Scalia/Maria does sound obvious. So I’m surely not the first to use “Maria” to parody Scalia. But I don’t want to do a Google search, lest I be inadvertently influenced by someone else’s lyrics.

And with that disclaimer out of the way, here’s my parody:

Scalia,
The jiggery-pok’ry Scalia,
Treats justice like a game,
The worst judge I can name, you see.

Scalia,
The wingnutty jurist, Scalia,
Demands the final word
With phrases so absurd, to me.

Scalia,
When he loses a case, he’s sulking,
And his presence is always so hulking.

Scalia,
The nastiest Justice, Scalia.

Scalia, Scalia, Scalia, etc.

Scalia,
Pitches disses, instead of reason,
Disagreements with him — treats like treason.

Scalia,
That sore-losing, pompous Scalia.

The most odious person on that Court:

Scalia!

Limerick Ode To Antonin Scalia

Monday, July 6th, 2015

If you follow the U.S. Supreme Court, you know that Justice Scalia ended the term by hurling some colorful, spoiled-bratty insults at his fellow judges. His behavior was so over-the-top, that Slate created The Antonin Scalia “Sick Burn” Generator, an insult creator packed with Scalia-isms.

This calls for a limerick, don’t you think?

Using lingo arcane and absurd,
Scalia must have the last word:
Gives “the bird” to his peers
With “pure apple sauce” jeers
He’s a “jiggery-pokery” turd.

Limerick Ode To Antonin Scalia

Monday, April 21st, 2014

I can’t help wondering whether Supreme Court Justice Scalia says weird things like this just for attention:

Speaking at the University of Tennessee College of Law on Tuesday, the longest-serving justice currently on the bench was asked by a student about the constitutionality of the income tax, the Knoxville News Sentinel reports.

Scalia responded that the government has the right to implement the tax, “but if it reaches a certain point, perhaps you should revolt.”

Limerick Ode To Antonin Scalia
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Suggesting that students revolt
Over taxes ain’t very adult.
It seems doltish Scalia
Has mouth diarrhea.
I surmise that his brain’s short a bolt.

Limerick Ode To Scott Brown

Wednesday, October 3rd, 2012

Dear Scott Brown: When trying to sell yourself in Massachusetts as a moderate independent, it’s best not to name Antonin Scalia as your favorite U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Methinks you made Elizabeth Warren’s day.

Limerick Ode To Scott Brown
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Scott Brown, seems your cover’s been blown:
Your favorite Justice is known
As Extremist Supreme.
You named Nino! Your scheme
To sound moderate’s naught but a drone.

Supreme Indecency (Limerick)

Tuesday, April 3rd, 2012

Chances are, you’ve heard about the latest Supreme Court travesty:

In a 5-4 decision, the court ruled against a New Jersey man erroneously arrested during a 2005 traffic stop for a fine he had already paid. Today’s ruling holds that even people arrested for minor offenses can be subjected to strip searches.

Supreme Indecency (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Thanks to Kennedy, Roberts, Scalia,
And their pals, cops can strip ya and see ya.
They don’t need any reason:
It’s strip searching season.
Our privacy’s gone! Mama mia!