Archive for the ‘Campaign Humor’ Category

Our Vendetta-In-Chief (Limerick)

Monday, November 23rd, 2020

Headline: “Vindictive Trump Seeks To Undermine Biden”

The Donald’s vindictive and mean,
So he’s venting his voting-loss spleen
And punishing Joe
And the nation. The woe
Trump’s inflicting is foul and obscene.

Our Brazen Almost-Ex-President (Limerick)

Thursday, November 19th, 2020

The Donald keeps getting more brazen
With the voter fraud nonsense he’s raisin’.
Trump lies and conspires,
Throws bombs and sets fires,
As he blocks the Prez Joe Biden phase-in.

Open Limerick To Emily Murphy

Thursday, November 19th, 2020

Headline: “The self-inflicted agony of Emily Murphy”

Dear woman who runs GSA:
You are under great stress, so you say.
Your pressure is huge?
You deserve it, you STOOGE!
You’re the cause of this mass disarray.

Bargaining With The Devil (Limerick)

Tuesday, November 17th, 2020

Says Trump, no transition for Joe!
I’m not leaving this dump — I won’t go.
I’ll remain here at least
Until I’m deceased.
Change my mind? That would take tons of dough.

Liars Flee “Censorship” (Limerick)

Monday, November 16th, 2020

NY Times Headline: “Fact-Checked on Facebook and Twitter, Conservatives Switch Their Apps

“Since the election, millions have migrated to alternative social media and media sites like Parler, Rumble and Newsmax.”

If you’re fact-checked on Facebook or Twitter,
There’s no need to feel outraged or bitter;
Join Parler or Rumble.
The folks there don’t grumble
At lies. They just spread ’em and titter.

What Trump’s Good At (Limerick)

Monday, November 16th, 2020

The Donald’s fomenting unrest,
And keeps failing the leadership test.
He ain’t leaving, he says;
He’s our worst ever prez…
Though at spreading big lies, he’s the best.

Bomb-Thrower-In-Chief (Limerick)

Friday, November 13th, 2020

While Biden is counseling calm,
The bomb-throwing Trump has no qualm
About causing upheaval
And chaos. Trump’s evil!
Can’t wait for the Joe Biden balm.

Trump’s Dangerous Purge (Limerick)

Thursday, November 12th, 2020

Headline: “Trump’s Defense Department purge threatens our security”

Donald Trump is engaged in a purge;
A destruction of government surge.
He’s stacking positions
With yes-men whose mission’s
To help Donald heighten his scourge.

Victim-In-Chief Trump (Limerick)

Thursday, November 12th, 2020

Headline: “Trump wants to be forced out”

Trump’s a “victim” who’s constantly peeved;
He’s “defrauded,” “maligned,” even “thieved.”
Is martyrdom great
For his brand? Yes, damn straight!
Like his base, Donald’s always aggrieved.

Transition Madness (Limerick)

Wednesday, November 11th, 2020

Headline: “How Trump’s transition of power delay threatens national security and public safety”

Joe’s win’s been established with surety.
Yet Trump shows his lack of maturity:
To impede Joe’s transition
Is reckless; Trump’s mission
Is risking our nation’s security.

Open Limerick To Donald Trump

Wednesday, November 11th, 2020

Dear Donald, you’ve lost. Joe has won.
Your plan to stay put’s been undone.
And your sore-loser acts
Do not change any facts;
There’s no fraud, so your win chance is NONE!

The Trump Enablers Are Still Enabling (Limerick)

Tuesday, November 10th, 2020

Headline: “By humoring Trump, the GOP is enabling authoritarianism”

The GOP’s humoring Trump
Cuz they’re scared of that venomous grump,
Who’s vindictive and bitter —
Might diss them on Twitter.
So they skitter and dodge; each a chump.

Yet Another “If Trump Could Write Limericks”

Saturday, November 7th, 2020

It’s FAKE NEWS that I lost out to Joe;
He’s a Liar, a Fraud, and a Schmo!
I will NEVER stop Suing,
Berating, and Booing.
Will I vacate the Oval? HELL, NO!!!

How Donald Will Handle Loss (Limerick)

Wednesday, November 4th, 2020

Will Donald Trump ever concede?
I doubt it; that sort of a deed
Requires some class.
Needy Donald’s an ass.
Self-promotion is Trump’s only creed.

My Worried Prediction (Limerick)

Sunday, November 1st, 2020

Donald Trump will be jumping the gun
And loudly proclaiming “I won!”
He’ll ignore the result
And give cues to his cult
That it’s time for some bloodthirsty “fun.”

Limerick Ode To the Boaster-In-Chief

Sunday, November 1st, 2020

Using any excuse for a boast,
Trump will brag via speech, tweet, or post:
He’s the best and the greatest
(And no doubt the straightest.)
Another four years … and we’re toast!

Trepidatious Times (Limerick)

Sunday, November 1st, 2020

How I long to at last feel elation.
But for now, all I feel’s trepidation.
I’ll be filled with chagrin,
If Joe doesn’t win;
What we’ll face is our nation’s ruination.

GOP Quandary

Saturday, October 31st, 2020

Headline: “Trump drags down GOP senators, giving Democrats more paths to the majority”

Mitch McConnell and Co bet it all
On the Donald, but in the long haul,
Having pinned hopes and dreams
For their vile, evil schemes
On that crook, they are bound for a fall.

Trump Musing About Losing (Limerick)

Thursday, October 29th, 2020

Headline: “Trump Ponders Being a Loser”

I hear tell that the Donald’s been musing
About maybe, conceivably losing.
It’s a frightening thought,
For his future is fraught;
Relocation to prison is bruising.

Trump Supporters Left Out In The Cold (Limerick)

Thursday, October 29th, 2020

Headline: “Hundreds stranded in the cold waiting for buses in chaotic post-Trump rally scene”

Trump fans were left out in the cold
At an Omaha rally, we’re told.
Freezing temps — people stranded,
Their treatment offhanded;
Cast aside like they’re garbage or mold.