Limerick of the Week (141)
It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off.
Congratulations to Chris Doyle, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:
If you’re tired at the wheel, I suggest
That you stop at a trooper’s behest.
And if ordered to nap,
Don’t refuse, because . . . zap!
You’ll be tased for resisting a rest.
Congratulations to Johanna Richmond, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for this limerick which received the most Facebook “likes.”
I know I just said, not in jest,
That I planned to give lim’ricks a rest,
But that promise won’t mute me:
I’m back! OK, shoot me—
I’m wearing my bullet-proof vest.
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) John Lawrence Ramos, Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes, Chris Doyle, Steve Whitred, Johanna Richmond, and Craig Dykstra. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
John Lawrence Ramos:
At the diner, a man would ingest
His romaine without pants, shirt or vest;
When the waitress looked pained,
He politely explained
He preferred his green salad undressed.
A woman was speaking in jest
When she said, “All my sins are confessed.”
She’d forgotten a few.
That’s what girls tend to do
When their past simply can’t pass the test.
A beekeeper tells me in jest
That he plans, when he’s laid to his rest,
To give all that he owns
To his Queen and her drones,
Thus completing his final bee-quest.
I once knew a girl who’d suggest
She was better in bed than the rest.
I said “Don’t mean to boast,
But I’m better than most.
We should challenge ourselves to a test!”
Don’t you hate it when folks say,”I jest!”
After putting your pride to the test?
Hell, “I Jest!” just won’t do
When “How was it for you?”
Is rejoined by “You looked better dressed!”
My gal went out joggin’ but jest
Wasn’t close to approprit’ly dressed.
Guys would run along side her
As soon as they spied her—
‘Cause her top failed at keepin’ abreast.
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!