Limerick Fall (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow who’d taken the fall…*

or

A gal was enjoying the fall…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Fall
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow who’d taken the fall
For his boss got enraged, took an awl
And then spiked the guy’s head.
His boss is now dead.
All told, it’s a job-ending brawl.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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66 Responses to “Limerick Fall (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. Rob Pivarnik says:

    A fellow who’d taken a fall
    Was not very upset at all,
    For pain was his kink,
    So, despite what you’d think,
    He really was having a ball.

  2. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    A gal was enjoying the fall
    Of her rival, who (motto: “Take all”)
    Fooled their boss for a while
    With her blinding white smile
    Til his incessant calls of “Hey, doll!”

    Led to snarls of rebellion one day,
    And facades both had built dropped away.
    Leers and Teeth had it out,
    Curse and shout became rout:
    Our gal likes her additional pay.

  3. Tom Harris says:

    Poor, old Adam after the fall,
    Was sure Eve had way too much gall.
    She’d said, “Here, take a taste.”
    Which he did in haste.
    But he’d never liked apples at all.

  4. Mark Kane says:

    A woman would easily fall
    For southern guys, it was their drawl.
    She’d try and resist,
    Until she was kissed.
    She so fancied that sexy “Y’all.”

  5. Mark Kane says:

    A woman would easily fall
    For cute guys, as she’d trawl through the mall.
    She’d flash them some lace,
    Then soon need a place.
    Thank G-d for the handicap stall.

  6. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    The people rejoiced in the fall
    Of their burden, the feared Berlin Wall.
    Came the day peace prevailed,
    Reunited halves hailed;
    Ponder distance between them – now small?

  7. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    We wept at the sight of their fall:
    The two towers, which had stood so tall
    But fell on that day.
    Love or hate, which holds sway?
    I plead peace, forgiveness for all…

  8. John Sardo says:

    A gal was enjoying a fall
    Festival at a large mall
    She drank hard rum cider
    Too much woe betide her
    At a stall took a fall with legs all asprawl.

  9. John Sardo says:

    A fellow who’d taken a fall
    For a gal who was seven feet tall
    Though short as an elf
    Was proud of himself
    With his talents the gal he’d enthrall.

  10. John Sardo says:

    A fellow who’d taken a fall
    For a friend who stayed late at a ball.
    Went out with his wife
    Had the time of his life.
    And said “I was never St. Paul.”

  11. Kirk Miller says:

    After many a day of snowfall,
    To the snowgirl the snowman did call,
    “I do hope that perchance,
    You would like to go dance.
    And the venue, of course: the Snow Ball.”

  12. Kirk Miller says:

    An event that was sad did befall
    To a history student named Paul,
    Changed his major one day;
    The professor did say
    That the field had no future at all.

  13. Kirk Miller says:

    It looked like hard luck would befall
    The seamstress, who started to bawl.
    When she hung by a thread,
    Tailor saved her, instead.
    For her, it was quite a clothes call.

  14. Kirk Miller says:

    From the spring until late in the fall,
    Since the days I was young and quite small,
    I’d play catch just for fun.
    Now I play with grandson.
    You should try it. It’s really a ball!

  15. Kirk Miller says:

    Many rattlesnakes hope men will fall
    When they’re bitten, so quickly they crawl.
    It’s a game the snakes play.
    When two men get away,
    Snakes’ coach says that you can’t venom all.

  16. Kirk Miller says:

    When from Eden the people did fall,
    Said the snake to them both with much gall,
    “Here’s a tip for Adam
    And for you, dear madam:
    You should know that you can’t venom all.”

  17. Judith H. Block says:

    A fellow who’d taken the fall
    For his boss, wasn’t happy at all.
    “I want a HUGE pension,
    Or the truth I will mention!
    Pay now or you’ll join my downfall!

  18. Craig says:

    I’ve been seeing this girl since last fall.
    In the bedroom, she sure does it all!
    I’m one testicle shy
    But I still can’t deny
    That this gal is the Belle of the Ball.

  19. Judith H. Block says:

    A gal was enjoying the fall
    Of her boss,who had tried to maul
    Her ofttimes,
    He paid for his crimes!
    She showed him who’d won after all!

  20. It’s Thanksgiving. What happened to fall?
    It was summer, now winter — that’s all.
    It was sixty degrees;
    Now I’m starting to freeze…
    So please hurry and open the mall!

  21. A boy had a terrible fall –
    In the fountain he fell in a sprawl
    (For this is what comes
    From doing one’s sums
    While walking on top of a wall).

    Whatever the future may bring,
    We’ve now seen a marvelous thing:
    I think you’ll agree
    How rare it must be
    For a summer to fall in the spring!

  22. John Ramos says:

    A progressive young man took a fall
    When he tripped on a curb at the mall;
    He felt like a cad
    For he hated to add
    To the problem of more urban sprawl.

  23. Craig says:

    At a Hallowe’en party last fall
    I hooked up with a gal in the hall.
    She was really quite gifted,
    Her mask never lifted –
    I love a good masquerade ball.

  24. Craig says:

    When the debutante took a bad fall,
    The resulting unladylike sprawl
    Made it clear in a flash
    That the “belle” of that bash
    Wasn’t even a lady at all!

  25. rbasler says:

    Humpty Dumpty, he had a great fall
    But he shouldn’t have been on that wall
    The sign said, “NO EGGS!
    “UNLESS YOU HAVE LEGS!”
    Now his brains are all scrambled, so LOL!

  26. Patrice of the ManyCats says:

    In Phoenix, we long for the Fall
    But have few autumn leaves to enthrall
    Us, baked in the sun:
    Scrambled brains, three to one!
    I prance as I unpack my one shawl :)

  27. Craig says:

    The truth behind ol’ Humpty’s fall?
    He had climbed up the neighbor gal’s wall.
    Seems that chick was quite sleazy
    She’d go “over easy”
    And sunbathe in nothin’ at all.

  28. Fred Bortz says:

    POE IS ME… NOT

    On a dark, dreary midnight one fall,
    He awoke to a scavenger’s call.
    But wouldn’t you know it,
    That second-rate poet
    Never heard, “Nevermore!” Not at all!

  29. Fred Bortz says:

    Humpty Dumpty, he had a great fall
    From the Garden of Eden’s tall wall.
    At least that’s the thesis
    Of the Goose Exegesis
    To the best of my faulty recall.

  30. Ira Bloom says:

    A fellow who’d taken a fall,
    On consuming too much alcohol,
    Said “I’ve now found the floor.
    I could get to the door,
    If I only could locate the wall.”

  31. yt cai says:

    A woman was wearing a fall
    Twas raven in hopes to enthrall
    The problem with these locks
    Is they attracted big cocks
    Crowing on their way to the ball

  32. Tom Harris says:

    Humpty Dumpty had a great fall,
    Slipping off a very large wall.
    It wasn’t a joke,
    Three men drowned in the yolk,
    But the horse scrambled from its stall.

  33. THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING
    The Knowledge that came from the Fall
    Was not what’s reported at all.
    ‘Twasn’t Evil and Good;
    Rather, both understood
    Adam’s penis was laughably small.

  34. O learn from my fate, and don’t fall
    In love with a “Barbie”-type doll,
    For she may come to life.
    Then you’re stuck with a wife
    Who is plastic and twelve inches tall.

  35. John Ramos says:

    The stir-fry chef Yu Hong did fall
    Into love with the song “Glad Rag Doll.”
    Now Diana’s sweet voice
    Informs each menu choice;
    Before Yu can wok, Yu must Krall.

  36. A fellow who’d taken a fall
    When his crack use enraged City Hall,
    Said, “The smidgeon I had
    Doesn’t make me all bad.
    I have ladies lined up to the wall!”

  37. P Diane Schneider says:

    As temperature started to fall
    My energy started to pall
    So I went out and bought a
    Macchiato Latte
    And had to be sure it’s a tall

  38. Tom Harris says:

    The cute chick for whom Fred did fall
    Could not stand him, no not at all.
    But Fred had money,
    So she called him “honey,”
    And let him take her to the ball.

  39. Abby says:

    A gal was enjoying the fall
    So much all she could do was crawl
    Through a pile of leaves,
    Full of laughs and dry heaves.
    She’d finally heard nature’s call.

  40. John Ramos says:

    A colonial thief took a fall
    When caught with a big sphagnum haul.
    He was trying to clear
    A large debt to Revere.
    That’s right: He robbed peat to pay Paul.

  41. billgncs says:

    A fellow who’d taken the fall
    learned a lesson on the art of a brawl
    while rules may be nice
    they rarely suffice
    ’cause a sucker punch counts twice for all

  42. Tim James says:

    I fear that I let my guard fall
    With a gal I thought quite a fine doll.
    The next morn (my mind boggles)
    I discerned that beer goggles
    Have nothing on grain alcohol.

  43. kaykuala says:

    A fellow who’d taken the fall
    How easy to be hoodwinked by all
    He got to thinking
    No more giving in
    Knock them blue, make them look small

    Hank

  44. A pal of mine who hates the fall..
    I yet endeared to the winter snow…
    But nah..I love the fall
    Wherever winds blow..is where i go
    For whatever snows..i stay…away..

  45. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    From grace a young fellow did fall
    After his girl said his dick was too small
    He replied with a snigger
    “If your quim was much bigger
    You could hire it out as a hall.”

  46. Charley Simmons says:

    OSHA requirements prevent his great fall
    When a modern day Humpty sits on his wall.
    With harnesses and a large safety net,
    Climbing up and down is now a safe bet.
    And all the King’s horses can stay in their stall.

  47. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    An old hooker had a great fall
    Went arse over head in the Mall
    But while she was falling
    The sight was appalling
    For was wearing no knickers at all.

  48. Charley Simmons says:

    An old maid was raking her leafs in the Fall
    When she came on a yard gnome quite handsome tho’ small
    “I’m magic he said. I come alive once a year
    If you let me make love there is nothing to fear.”
    She squealed with delight and they both had a ball.

  49. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    A Reps sales continued to fall
    At the annual Birth Control Ball
    For sale he had Pessaries
    And all sorts of accessories
    To aid f*****g, but sold bugger all.

  50. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    With Summer, Winter and Fall
    Together with Spring tends to gall
    Then there’s fire and flood
    Cyclones and mud
    Down Under we’ve now got it all.

  51. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    To desires a young fellow did fall
    Seeing girl bending over a wall
    And although uninvited
    With her he united
    Until both were thrown out of the Mall.

  52. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    In the scrub he had a terrible fall
    Which left him with only one ball
    And much later he found
    When playing around
    His Golf Bag held no balls at all.

  53. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    A fellow had a real nasty fall
    Fell in the dry pool at the Mall
    Had he drowned in the pool
    That would have been cruel
    But he did’nt he died from the fall.

  54. Mark Kane says:

    You’ve been drinking but try not to fall.
    Soon you find yourself deep in a brawl.
    If this was “Breaking Bad,”
    You’d be more mad than sad,
    And just laugh and think “Better Call Saul.”

  55. rafael says:

    A man of the clothe took a fall
    Bar’s height into Heaven too tall
    So he cried,”Oh sweet Jesus
    I’m down on my knees’es
    For whom, in the Hell, do I call?”

  56. Dr. Goose says:

    A fellow had taken a fall
    In the men’s room, while “heeding the call;”
    But the key to his fame
    Was impeccable aim;
    Did he sprinkle a bit? Not at all.

  57. Dr. Goose says:

    The Serpent, for causing The Fall,
    On his belly henceforth had to crawl.
    So the Scriptures begin
    With Original Sin,
    As it’s well-known to most (but not all).

  58. Charley Simmons says:

    A teacher was fired this fall
    When caught having sex in the hall
    Not with a student,
    He was more prudent
    But the mascot goat for football.

  59. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    Being 80 I hope I don’t fall
    While I’m perving on neighbour Lyndall
    To watch her caressing
    Herself while undressing
    As I stand on this chair in the hall.

  60. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    A Trapeze artist slipped and did fall
    When aroused by his partner Myall
    But she saved him real quick
    Grabbing him by the dick
    And part of his hairy left ball.

  61. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    A Clone had a real nasty fall
    Pushed by other half from a high wall
    Who when caught made a fuss
    And started to cuss
    So was jailed for an obscene clone fall.

  62. Johanna Richmond says:

    Hmmm…
    Submissions on holidays fall…
    While you geniuses shop at the mall,
    Just WATCH how I slip in
    And give you a whippin’
    You can’t put a price in sheer gall.

  63. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    Nudists blindfold the women each Fall
    Creating a fun game for all
    They check each male’s member
    And try to remember
    Who’re the owners of each dick and ball.

  64. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    An old lady knocked out in a fall
    Dreamed she was nude on her boobs in the Mall
    She near had a stroke
    For when she awoke
    Found Graffiti on her backside and all.

  65. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    A Fancy Dressed ghost had a fall
    Spilling food and drink over his shawl
    So he quickly undressed
    Hoping not to shock guests
    Who of course couldn’t see him at all.

  66. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun week of limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner, the Facebook Friends’ Choice Award Winner, and the Honorable Mention Winners: Limerick of the Week 142.

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Crabby Limerick.