Limerick of the Week (43)

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off. I’m very pleased to announce the winning Limerick of the Week and the Honorable Mentions:

Congratulations to GORDON RICHMOND who wins Limerick of the Week for this clever verse:

As the new year approaches, men swear
They will aim for the toilet with care,
But the subject in hand
May ignore the command
And reroute its direction mid-air.

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Robert Basler, Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes, Robert Schechter, Madeleine Sara Maddocks, Johanna Richmond, and Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:

Robert Basler:

As the new year approaches, men swear
They will read all the works of Flaubert.
But soon, it’s “Hey, Mabel!
“This channel on cable
“Shows reruns of ‘Sonny and Cher!’”

Brenda Bryant a/k/a Rinkly Rimes:

As the New Year approaches men swear
That they’ll have a real hot love-affair.
But the girls that they meet
In the bar, on the street,
Say “We’re sorry! Your cupboard is bare!”

Robert Schechter:

As the new year approaches, men swear
To rise from their sofa or chair
And move their fat asses.
The impulse soon passes,
Replaced by a staunch laissez faire.

Madeleine Sara Maddocks:

As the new year approaches, men swear
To dispose of their old underwear,
As their grubby old briefs
Rouse disparaging shrieks
From the gals they invite to their lair.

Johanna Richmond:

As the new year approaches, men swear:
No more meat or at least none cooked rare;
Why have twelve beers when six
Is an adequate fix?
As for porn, only followed by prayer!

Phyllis Sterling Smith a/k/a Granny Smith:

As the New Year approaches, gals swear
That they MUST buy some NEW clothes to wear.
But each husband still clings
To his old worn-out things:
“You can NOT throw them out. Don’t you dare!”

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.

In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.

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6 Responses to “Limerick of the Week (43)”

  1. Johanna Richmond says:

    Congratulations, Dad! I knew you’d be a natural:) And congrats to all the HM’s as well! Love this community of funny, talented people:)

  2. Madeleine says:

    LOL! Thanks for the honourable mention. That was my hubby’s favourite too.There was some stiff competition this week.
    Congrats to GORDON.

  3. sideview says:

    Gordon – a worthy winner ;-)

  4. Veralynne says:

    Wheeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!! Lotsa fun but a difficult choice of prime quality! Well done, all! You’re rare talents in this medium–I’ll “steak” my rep on it!

  5. madkane says:

    Congratulations once again to all the winners!