Limerick Trips (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And since Mother’s Day is approaching, I’m offering you an alternative: In addition to your regular challenge, you may write a limerick related to Mother’s Day, using any first line. Next week I’ll present an extra award — one for the best Mother’s Day limerick.

And now, getting back to your regular Limerick-Off challenge: I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow who took many trips…*

or

A fellow who frequently trips…*

or

A gal who enjoys taking trips…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Trips
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow who took pricey trips
Was exceedingly chintzy with tips.
Just deserts fin’ly came
When he crossed the wrong dame,
Who laced his dessert and his dips.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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59 Responses to “Limerick Trips (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. Bob Dvorak says:

    A woman enjoyed taking trips
    With an eye to a guy ‘tween her hips.
    Pick her out in the line
    At the counter — the sign?
    She’s the one can’t stop licking her lips.

  2. Diane Groothuis says:

    This woman enjoyed taking trips
    And she had body art neath her hips
    And the artist so dumb
    At the back of her bum
    Had freely embellished two lips.

  3. A fellow who took many trips
    To clubs where a young lady strips
    Got the fright of his life
    Recognising his wife
    Both dancing and pulling large tips.

  4. Ailsa McKillop says:

    A fellow who took many trips
    Over global cuisine smacked his lips
    He travelled to Britain
    And forthwith was smitten
    With a craving for fried fish and chips

  5. Sue Dulley says:

    Astronomers like to take trips
    To see every solar eclipse.
    To witness totality
    In any locality
    They travel in trains, planes and ships.

  6. Ailsa McKillop says:

    A fellow who takes many trips
    For his firm, who make magnetic strips
    (For smart cards, with circuit
    Embedded, to work it)
    Goes to Thailand to buy microchips

  7. Pat Hatt says:

    A fellow who took many trips
    Also locked many lips
    To the unwilling
    He found it fulfilling
    But has many bruises on his hips

  8. Ailsa McKillop says:

    A lady who took many trips
    Had to discourage drunken old rips
    With hauteur she would glare –
    A basilisk stare! –
    At fellows who made risqué quips

  9. Stephen Fleming says:

    A fellow frequently trips
    Because he frequently sips
    From a bottle of wine
    With mushrooms so fine
    To sense a reality eclipse.

  10. kaykuala says:

    A fellow who took many trips
    Felt guilty for he often sleep
    Woke up with grunt
    For missing the fun
    By nature he just could not help it

    A fellow who frequently trips
    Is so clumsy with such a habit
    Knocks into tables
    Upset lots of people
    Grins but not bothered one bit

    Hank

  11. foam says:

    A fellow who frequently trips

    While watching a lunar eclipse

    Once found himself mooning

    A lady cartooning

    Who smacked him then drew on his hips

  12. brian miller says:

    a fellow who took many trips
    (and along the way kissed a few lips)
    found late in life
    it hard to find a wife
    with the reputation of taking so many sips

  13. yt cai says:

    Old Tim Leary took too many trips
    While on acid his mind did some flips
    Took a trip to Cape Cod
    And thought he saw God
    Both inside a bag of kettle chips

  14. Chris Papa says:

    A lady who took many trips,
    Would land on her rear from such slips,
    With little to fear,
    Since her padded rear,
    Would accomadate friends’ S-M whips.

  15. yt cai says:

    To buffet Jane took many trips
    For more of those tasty beef tips
    She kept up the pace
    It was a close race
    Went straight from her lips to her hips

  16. John Sardo says:

    A gal who enjoys taking trips
    Gave a bartender really big tips
    She gave him her number
    An invitation to slumber
    While his pants she dreamily unzips.

  17. John Sardo says:

    A gal who enjoys taking trips
    To warm climes to take naked dips
    She was really a tease
    No guy would she please
    Left the water and gave them all flips.

  18. John Sardo says:

    A gal who enjoys taking trips
    Before boarding had too many nips
    She’d flirt without shame
    But took all the blame
    For kissing the guys with hot lips.

  19. John Sardo says:

    A fellow who took many trips
    Got sequestered and did double flips
    He went into a rage
    Was put in a cage
    Before finally coming to grips.

  20. Mark Kane says:

    A stripper who frequently trips,
    Has her breasts grazing men’s hungry lips.
    Her clients are jerks,
    But this really works.
    These “Stumbles” are raising her tips.

  21. Diane Groothuis says:

    That fellow who frequently trips
    And linguistically makes lots of slips
    Should try a new style
    Of pants for a while
    Since buttons are safer than zips.

  22. Ailsa McKillop says:

    An investor who took many trips
    Owned many quite valuable scrips
    Which highly were scoring
    (Sorry, this is so boring)
    If they suffered no stock exchange blips

  23. Ailsa McKillop says:

    A lady who took many trips
    Taught jam-making, passing on tips
    Marmalade: not abstruse!
    Simmer sugar; lemon juice
    Orange rind, thickly sliced — and the pips!

  24. Sue Dulley says:

    A skater’s mom takes many trips
    To watch her do axels and flips.
    She uses these missions
    To judged competitions
    To watch out for digital slips.

  25. yt cai says:

    Over words the comedian trips
    At the clubs he mangled his quips
    Jokes just wouldn’t align
    Wouldn’t know a punch line
    If it hit him square between the hips

  26. Sue Dulley says:

    In the ‘fifties young sweethearts made trips
    To the cinema just to lock lips.
    Too young for the sack
    They’d smooch at the back
    Not stopping for popcorn or chips.

  27. Sue Dulley says:

    Some cars aren’t ideal for long trips.
    They look like old cartoon space-ships.
    For more miles per litre
    Drive something that’s neater -
    Keep hot rods for cruising the strips.

  28. Sue Dulley says:

    Historians made lots of trips
    To Troy to find cheeks, eyes and lips
    Of beauty divine
    But found less than nine
    That might launch a few dozen ships.

  29. Illsa Gorrey says:

    A fellow who frequently trips
    With reality could not come to grips
    He sought acid and shrooms
    And opium blooms
    To give day to day living the slips

  30. Radnoft Pladzitcki says:

    A fellow who frequently trips
    To the John eats too many chips
    Chocolates, Deep Frys
    Biscuits and Pies
    And plenty of Cheesy Dips.

  31. Ailsa McKillop says:

    As Sue pointed out in her verse
    The occasion to get out one’s purse
    And buy treats for one’s mother
    Is a date wholly other
    Here in the UK — so perverse!

    To England of centuries ago
    The roots of the custom we owe
    With the spring wind a-wuthering
    Girls would go home “a-mothering”
    Bearing posies on mums to bestow

    Am I a pedant? No, no!
    There again — [lets her pedantry show]
    The name here for this fun day
    Is Mothering Sunday
    When to “mother church” one should go

    Now the date of this happy event
    Is always fourth Sunday in Lent
    I won’t get all religious
    And write screeds prodigious
    But with lunar phases ’tis blent

    Easter Day is the date, once released
    Makes binding on vicar and priest
    Holy days fore and aft
    So — I know it sounds daft –
    Mothers’ Day is a moveable feast

  32. Craig says:

    My career lets me take lots of trips.
    I tend bar on some cruise-liner ships.
    I like it a lot
    ‘Cause there’s nothing so hot
    As a drunk girl with really big tips.

  33. Diane Groothuis says:

    I’m wondering what I can say
    On the subject of next Mothers’Day
    I extend all my Love
    To Mums here and “above”
    WIth showers of blessings on way.

  34. Craig says:

    On some of these bartending trips
    I meet girls with slim hips and full lips.
    If they’re pretty and young
    (Since I’m very well hung)
    Sometimes I’m the one giving big tips.

  35. Diane Groothuis says:

    Craig D has been taking some trips
    And meeting some girls with nice hips
    When they’re young and pretty
    He tries to be witty
    Saying “I’m Houlahan call me ‘Hot lips’”

  36. John Larkin says:

    A fellow who frequently trips
    could not account for his slips.
    A friend who could see
    said, “It’s plain as can be.
    Your lips take in too many nips.”

  37. Fred Bortz says:

    The astronomer’s too frequent trips
    To savor Miss Moonbeam’s sweet lips
    Were the proximate cause:
    He forgot Kepler’s Laws
    And was late for the solar eclipse.

  38. Sue Dulley says:

    Aron Ralston’s on one of his trips,
    Canyoneering; a massive rock slips
    And pins down has arm.
    Escape means self-harm -
    Thank goodness it’s north of his hips.

  39. Tim James says:

    The computer rep took many trips,
    Packing memory cards in his grips.
    With each service call done,
    Every client, bar none,
    Would tell him, “Goodbye, Mr. Chips.”

  40. Judith H. Block says:

    People who take many trips
    Know alot and have great travel tips!
    They agree with gusto,
    That an AGS show
    Has great gerbils and makes new friendships!

  41. Kirk Miller says:

    A fellow enjoys taking trips
    And says that before modern ships’
    Invention, vacations
    Were cheaper sensations,
    “‘Cause each cruise was on sail,” the man quips.

  42. Diane Groothuis says:

    A bookmaker cheating with tips
    Made illegal signs with his lips
    If it’s winning I’ll pout
    I will smile if it’s out
    If it’s nobbled I’ll wiggle my hips.

  43. Ailsa McKillop says:

    A gal who enjoys taking trips
    Finds eating out bad for the hips
    She has a salad first course
    Then the fish with no sauce
    And the pudding she just simply skips.

  44. A gal who enjoys taking trips
    To casinos world over for chips
    Enough to buy horses
    For running tough courses
    And doesn’t care who/what she whips.

  45. David Lubar says:

    A fellow who took many trips,
    Watched far too much Youtube for clips
    Of the places he toured,
    So he ended up bored –
    Deprived of some great Serendips.

  46. Watch out for those travel hook-ups, Craig:

    A fellow on one of his trips
    Took a girl from the neon-lit strips
    To a no-tell motel…
    Now he doesn’t feel well;
    Plus his pecker’s turned purple and drips.

    And while we’re on the subject:

    Our neighbors bring back from their trips
    Strange parasites, fevers and grippes;
    The last they’ve run by us is
    Schistosomiasis
    (*Their* parties everyone skips).

  47. Sue Dulley says:

    Entomologists make flying trips
    To the rain forest, where each tree drips
    With insects bizarre,
    Less buggy by far
    Than house flies, mosquitos and thrips.

  48. A girl who took many trips
    got herself stuck midships
    Said she to the barge
    You have gotten quite large
    and I can’t heave my ho with my hips

  49. A fellow who took a few trips
    was found making love on the strip
    the sixties are over
    and he lost composure
    the year that they replaced his hip

  50. a fellow who frequently trips
    Met his friend on the deck amidships
    “Nice to see you”, says he
    “Should we meet up for tea?”
    “Or a bite of their cake and some sips?”
    Ta da!

  51. yt cai says:

    A seaman took exotic trips
    To ports on old rickety ships
    They barely set sail
    Thus starting this tail
    From lips of his cabin boy, Pip’s

    The behemoth with anger drips
    Out of water it does daring flips
    Enjoys wriggling about
    Shoots water from spout
    As tail from side to side whips

    One day at point of full eclipse
    From belly of beast a roar rips
    He was calling his prey
    In an awesome display
    Setting off distant radar blips

    In fear Ahab had too many nips
    Of rum laced with fermented turnips
    Went straight to the root
    Drunk it out of a boot
    The loose laces kept thrashing his lips

    Day darkness gave Ahab the yips
    Balked at pushing in all his chips
    In that game of life
    Cut deep like a knife
    Like flesh from the bone it outstrips

    The whale took one of its deep dips
    Rose upward at record speed clips
    Opened wide its jaws
    The widest of maws
    Before long the stern was in its hips

    Through choppy waves Moby Dick zips
    Still hearing old Ahab’s terse quips
    It’s not a big shocker
    In Davey Jones locker
    That the Captain is pushing up tulips

  52. Sue Dulley says:

    (*Not spam*) Many people make trips
    To Nevada, where all along strips
    The ca$inos entice
    With their slots, cards and dice,
    Free drinks, good buffet food and … chips.

  53. Diane Groothuis says:

    A lady who took many trips
    Saved all her sucked orange pips
    They were all-round her house
    Until one day a mouse
    Ate them and suffered the “ships”.

  54. Sue Dulley says:

    She’s made three cold-med-buying trips
    To the drugstore but still her nose drips.
    You’ve heard her loud cough
    When not sleeping it off.
    “Can a girl catch a man-cold?” she quips.

  55. Sue Dulley says:

    My friend goes on short hiking trips
    And always her pack she equips
    With clothing excesses,
    Some maps, GPSs,
    Her bird book, binocs, snacks and sips.

  56. Sue Dulley says:

    A comet makes regular trips
    Round its orbit, a long thin ellipse.
    To prepare for the day
    Our earth gets in its way
    We’ll need some apocalypse tips.

  57. Diane Groothuis says:

    Those dear Jewish Mothers not meek
    Expect phone-calls three times a week
    But it’s not a good habit
    To call on the Sabbath
    They won’t pick the phone up to speak.

  58. JulesPaige says:

    A fellow who frequently trips
    Often a word or two slurs and slips
    Unable to spell would be one thing
    But with a mike – don’t let him sing,
    Especially Karaoke with those trembling lips!

    ©JP/davh

  59. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone for another fun week of limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner, The Mother’s Day-themed Limerick Award Winner, the Facebook Friends’ Choice Award Winner, and the Honorable Mention Winners!

    Limerick of the Week 113

    But you can still have lots of limerick fun because a new Limerick-Off has just begun: Limerick Buff