Ginning Up Limericks (Limerick-Off Monday)

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s who won last week.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A man who was partial to gin…*

or

A gal who was partial to gin…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Ginning Up Limericks
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man who was partial to gin
Played it often and tended to win.
When encouraged to switch
And play poker, he’d bitch:
“Gin is wholesome, but poker’s a sin.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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91 Responses to “Ginning Up Limericks (Limerick-Off Monday)”

  1. Kay Salady says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Played on Wednesdays with all of her friends
    She was a sore loser
    As well as a boozer
    Who sat with a half-witted grin

  2. A man who was partial to gin
    hailed his partner in drink as his kin
    but got into trouble
    so drunk he saw double
    and thought that the guy was his twin.

    They drank ’til a quarter to three.
    Both men (one imaginary).
    Then came their perplexion
    when up popped the question:
    “Who’ll drive us both home, you or me?”

  3. A girl who was partial to gin
    Would later explain, with chagrin,
    “I think it’s the ice
    Or maybe the lime slice
    That puts my poor head in a spin.

  4. colonialist says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Estranged all his kith and his kin;
    ‘Shum tipple all day
    Keepsh the fambly away,’
    Was what he remarked with a grin.

  5. colonialist says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Said, ‘Juniper berries are in;
    Stuff from malt, grapes and hops
    Is best left in shops,
    Or, better still, cast in a bin.’

  6. Rinkly Rimes says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Said ‘Come on, let the party begin!’
    But with constantly boozing,
    And teenage-girl floozing,
    He ended up like Errol Flynn.
    *

  7. kaykuala says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Wouldn’t change but just grinned
    What do I care
    This is my fare
    No one’s bother of how I’ve sinned

  8. A man who was partial to gin
    Mixed a cocktail to pour the stuff in
    He chopped up a weenie
    Into his martini……….
    Wurst shape he has EVER been in!

  9. J Sardo says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Made white Russians for a fin
    A friend called him a fink
    You use vodka in the drink
    But these Russians come with a bedroom spin.

  10. jesse levy says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    and more than occasional sin,
    would take any guy
    who just happened by
    and let the big dope stick it in.

    Now she’s ruing the day
    she let virtue just fall away
    She’s big now with child
    and no longer wild
    All she can say is “Oy Vey!”

  11. Pat Hatt says:

    A man who was partial to gin,
    Sucked many back after his big win.
    He awoke the next day,
    And to his dismay,
    Was lying next to a relative of Rin Tin Tin

  12. A gal who was partial to gin
    Found that it led her to sin
    With men in great numbers
    Dock workers and plumbers
    So she didn’t know where to begin.

  13. A man who was partial to gin
    Had visions of growing more thin
    Heard of the gin diet
    Decided to try it–
    An empty head now tops this pin!

  14. Thom says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    At Mauna Kea she stood on the rim
    She stared at the bottle
    And with speed she did throttle
    The booze down her throat she didn’t win

  15. Veralynne says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Would drink ’til it ran down his chin.
    Not much fun at a party,
    He’d start out hale and hearty
    But pass out, his face in a grin.

  16. Veralynne says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    To work was ever late getting in.
    When he got home, Wife would say,
    “Change ties–it’s the start of your day!”
    He was a loser in every way.

    The boss would have fired him, but
    They both were in the same rut.
    The economy adrift,
    Both gave their jobs short shrift
    Thinking by cards they could “make the cut.”

    But they both ended up in the gutter.
    One tried golf, but he wasn’t a putter.
    They moved to Las Vegas and
    Tried their hand at cards in the sand
    But it all disappeared in a sputter.

    [WOW! That was lame desperation, eh? LOL!]

  17. Craig says:

    A gal who was partial to gin,
    ‘Cause it gave her a license to sin,
    Finally gave up on men,
    And swore “Never again!”
    Since the last one turned out to be kin.

  18. Craig says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Committed a marital sin.
    She finally confessed
    What her husband had guessed
    From the evidence there on her chin.

  19. Dr. Goose says:

    A man who was partial to gin, 
    As the liquor vermouth should be in,
    When offered some vodka,
    Wound up in the squad car 
    The bartender called in chagrin.

  20. Craig says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Drank too much of it, to his chagrin.
    His hangover fog
    Needs some Hair Of The Dog
    So: “More gin! Let the healing begin!”

  21. Craig says:

    A man who was partial to gin,
    For a bet he was trying to win,
    Followed gin with some rum,
    Then tequila – how dumb!
    It came out the same way it went in.

  22. Craig says:

    OK, one more, then I really gotta stop and do something else (sheesh!):

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Drank her dinner – day out and day in.
    “It’s the thing that I love,
    And the big secret of
    How I keep so incredibly thin.”

  23. RJ Clarken says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    had a brother who loved Scotch (his twin.)
    But regardless, they’d swill
    like the devil, for thrill.
    In their book, not to drink was a sin.

  24. RJ Clarken says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    liked her Gimlets with extra lime in,
    ‘cause when sippin’, she’d pucker
    for each barfly sucker
    who’d pass by and give her a grin.

  25. Nan Reiner (a/k/a Kitty Ditty) says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Performed a contortionist spin.
    When asked how he stuck it,
    Said “I’m from Nantucket,”
    And flashed a lascivious grin.

  26. Nan Reiner (a/k/a Kitty Ditty) says:

    Not content to let Craig corner the questionable taste market, I’ll offer one more:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Warned her lover, “Before you begin,
    I’ll wager a nickel
    Your cuke will be pickle
    The moment that you stick it in.”

  27. A gal who was partial to gin,
    became an embarrassment to her country and kin,
    when a party of bigots caved in,
    and thought they would give a woman a spin.
    When all she could do was talk stupid and grin,
    and changed the talk of the country to Palin.

  28. A gal who was partial to gin,
    found a man who was partial to sin.
    When the gal would drink gin,
    it would make her give in,
    to the priest she was repenting her sin.

  29. “revised”, “better”

    A gal who was partial to gin,
    found a man who was partial to sin.
    When the gal would drink gin,
    she would always cave in,
    to the priest confessing her sin.

  30. OK last one

    A gal who was partial to gin,
    married a man with a prick like a pin.
    In her gin induced fog,
    she always slept like a log,
    but her kids all looked like the dog.

  31. Matt Monitto says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Said, “The GOP folks,” with a grin,
    “Are so foolish and dumb
    That this drunken old bum,
    Should campaign; I’d be certain to win!”

  32. Matt Monitto says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Went on game shows, and thought he could win.
    But his chance? Microscopic:
    He said “Pants” for the topic
    “What I usually urinate in.”

  33. Craig says:

    Dang, these are addictive:

    A man who was partial to gin.
    Has discovered the wages of sin:
    “I’ve a brand-new tattoo
    And I’m missing a shoe,
    And I’ve still got no clue where I’ve been!”

  34. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    His wallet was down to a fin
    He begged to the clerk
    Who was quite a jerk
    And popped him one right in the chin

  35. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    liked limericks ’bout men who did grin
    He knew he mistuck it
    The dude from Nantucket
    Was only just scratching his chin

  36. Rich D says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    had scars up and down her shin
    When on her knees
    she never said please
    Just shimmied herself right on in

  37. Rich D says:

    A couple quite partial to gin
    In public they often did sin
    Got it on in a crowd
    They were rather loud
    All sounds that were lost in the din

  38. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Imbibed as his paint job begin
    He felt rather faint
    As it spilled in his paint
    Oh well, I’ll just drink the thin

  39. Rich D says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Engaged in such contests herein
    Although she tried hard
    She just was no bard
    Her problem was making it rhyme

  40. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    caused limericks that made us all grin
    I offer this post
    To amuse our host
    Cuz no way in hell will it win

  41. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Got married and was off with a grin
    They went to Niagara
    But he left his Viagra
    “A flop”, when the reviews came in

  42. A man who was partial to gin,
    A cruise ship captain who was an Italian,
    put his gin, and his ship on the rocks,
    he was seen sprinting only in socks,
    and was the first to abandon his ship.

  43. John Larkin says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    thought all whom he knew had a twin.
    When he found out the trouble
    that caused him to see double,
    then his path to sobriety would begin.

  44. A Ferret who was partial to gin,
    would get loaded and hit on the Minks at the gym.
    In the weasel world cross breading is a sin,
    but the Ferret thought one day a masked Mink might be in.

    “OK sorry I have had to much gin!”

  45. I”m fixing stuff

    A man who was partial to gin,
    a cruise ship captain who was an Italian,
    put his gin, and ship on the rocks.
    He was seen sprinting in only his socks,
    and was the first to abandon his ship to the docks.

  46. Dr. Goose says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    in London, but not in Berlin,  
    Admitted: “Perhaps 
    My pref’rence in schnapps 
    Depends on the city I’m in.”

  47. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Was singing “The Mighty Quinn”
    He was drunk as snot
    And soon he forgot
    Is the last word “without” or “within”?

  48. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Was convinced he was Erroll Flynn
    As pissed as a fart
    He forgot his part
    And what flick he thought he was in.

  49. A man who was partial to gin
    Drank and drank cause he never fit in
    He stood on a post
    Raised his glass up in toast
    And said, “Seagrams, you’re a true friend”

  50. Colleen Murphy says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Saw a lake that he chose to jump in.
    Then he started to think
    When he felt himself sink –
    Oops! I guess I should learn how to swim!

  51. Old Ollie says:

    you got a literal LOL from me

  52. A man who was partial to gin
    Pitched relief in the Red Sox bullpen
    When put in to save the big game
    Found the gin had ruined his aim
    And he then plunked a fan in Row 10

  53. A gal who was partial to gin,
    Would lick every drop off her chin.
    She shrugged off her affliction
    When accused of addiction
    “That’s a slur!” she would say, with a grin.

  54. Mama Zen says:

    Now, that’s excellent!

  55. Tom Hale says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Took his new bike for a spin
    Wrecked, they tangled as one
    And could not be undone
    So they notified his next of Schwinn

  56. colonialist says:

    A chap who was partial to gin
    Created a heck of a din,
    The bouncers then bounced him,
    His girlfriend renounced him,
    And slammer he’s in for his sin.

  57. A man who was partial to gin
    Used to drink till it covered his chin
    With a glistening spritz.
    It is sad, but that fits
    The description of half of my kin.

    (The other half are the women.)

  58. Mark Megson says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Drank dry every bar she was in
    She’d drink without tonic
    At speeds supersonic
    And boy did the bartenders grin

  59. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    imagined he was Ho Chi Minh
    He stood with a snap
    Pointed to a map
    Said, “My trail is marked with a pin!”

    Hey, poor Ho Chi hasn’t gotten any love with these rhymes yet :) So, off I flail into territory unknown….

  60. J Sardo says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Didn’t know where to begin
    To fix a fine brew
    From a dry bottle she knew
    Would leave her in utter chagrin.

  61. Granny Smith says:

    A gal an who was partial to gin
    Wished to play at gin rummy. A sin?
    Her fantasy? Cash
    A very large stash
    Due to drink, though, she never could win.

  62. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Played guitar like some mystical djinn
    But during his vamp
    He rubbed on a lamp
    His wishes had yet to begin!

  63. brian miller says:

    a man who was partial to gin
    had breath like pine needle sin
    blew noxious clouds
    when he belched aloud
    with the ladies was all done in

  64. Granny Smith says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Eschewed food and soon grew very thin.
    Her early demise
    Was not a surprise.
    She sipped from a straw and fell in.

  65. a man who was partial to gin
    grew over the years very thin
    he played chess all day long
    singing that one silly song
    that was like a lullaby to him

  66. poemblaze says:

    Great limerick, Madeleine. Here’s a bad one on short notice.

    A man who was partial to gin
    went to the circus in Flynn.
    When the acrobats twirled
    his dinner got hurled.
    He never went to the circus again.

  67. Beth Winter says:

    This gal who was partial to gin,
    slyly said with a wink and a grin,
    it can change a dull bore
    into a sex-starved whore.
    Grab the bottle and hit me again!

  68. zongrik says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    woke up in the local prison
    her whole demeanor stank
    sitting in the drunk tank –
    with her head trapped in the trash bin.

    I found the most perfect picture. check it out Trash Bin Drunk

  69. Hi Madeleine,

    Thanks for stopping by and for such a lovely comment. I’m so sorry I’m not much of a one for limericks but will try and put my thinking cap on ;)

  70. Michael Grove says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    also had an identical twin.
    One night he made a pass,
    and was a complete ass,
    then his brother took it on the chin.

    by Michael Grove

  71. Hi – Eyes closing but wanted to give some a try…
    ********************

    A man who was partial to gin
    Was a rummy known to all friends and kin
    When implored please to stop
    Up he’d sloppily hop
    Shouting “What’s wrong with some cards! Shut your din! “

    *******************
    A man who was partial to gin
    Delighted from end back to begin
    A concerned hand on his arm
    Would trip in him an alarm
    Having him run circles with a half in bag grin

    ******************
    A man who was partial to gin
    Decided a gams contest he’d win
    Even though he was a guy
    Thought this block he’d get by
    His ginned mirror told him his legs a shoe in

    ***************
    A man who was partial to gin
    Tonic never did he ever begin
    Took it straight down
    Any way else was for a clown
    Till his lady the White Rock Queen contest did win

    A man who was partial to gin
    Said I’ll beat you hands down and then win”
    Took a hammer and pounded
    As the poor other guy bounded
    From this literal lush all yang and no yin

    *********************

  72. chris dunn says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Claimed it bolstered her feminine Yin
    And when faced with a gang
    A’brim-full of male Yang
    Her gin brim-full Yin would still win.

  73. Umesh Rao says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Was clad in a suit from Pierre Cardin
    Piously devoted to his drink
    He ignored his lady’s wink
    The lady divorced him for this sin

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Saw an opportunity for a win
    She offered him another glass
    He gladly accepted it with class
    Together they went for a spin

  74. A man who was partial to gin
    but could never seem to win
    said, “It’s not that I’m dumb,
    I just likes me rum
    and never know when to say when

  75. A man who was partial to gin
    Thought a singing contract he could win
    But the”Idol” judges sent him packing
    When his voice was slurred and lacking
    Now he sings Karaoke at the Holiday Inn

  76. Bone says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Would call me some nights after ten
    “I’m lost,” she would swear
    “No, you’re just downstairs
    Prob’ly wandered in the closet again”

  77. Belinda says:

    A gal who was partial to gin
    Claimed it added a glow to her skin
    When the host served red wine
    she got up and said “fine”
    and delivered a toast with a grin.

  78. G-Man says:

    A man who was partial to Gin
    During breakfast is when he’d begin
    He mixed Tanqueray and Tropicana
    Brush his teeth with Ipana
    And have an ALL DAY shit eating grin!

  79. Laura Shavis says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Cared not that some thought it a sin
    With each glass he’d pour
    He’d want that much more
    ’til his acts would cause him chagrin!

  80. Granny Smith says:

    A priest who was partial to gin
    And overindulged in his sin
    With shivers of shock
    Was addressing his flock!
    And, shaken, he said, ” god can’t win!”

  81. Sara McNulty says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    and tonic with lime to begin,
    Soon nixed the tonic
    Was pronounced pneumonic
    Losing all the respect of his kin.

    ————————–
    A man who was partial to Gin
    Rummy, and poker would grin
    When he had a good
    Failed to keep his face bland
    There was simply no game he could win.

    —————————-
    A dame who was partial to gin
    during prohibition, a sin,
    Danced the Charleston each night
    In a beam of spotlight
    `Til the Feds armed with axes moved in.

  82. Neal P says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    gave the cop a lop-sided grin
    Oh, Sgt. McDermitt
    you may lift my permit
    Still I’ll ride to the bar on my Schwinn

  83. Mark Kane says:

    A man who was partial to gin,
    Drank cocktails while searching for sin.
    But he didn’t get far,
    Driving fast in his car.
    Now I think you best call next of kin.

  84. sandra says:

    a gal who was partial to gin
    was one of a southern twin
    she could not resist,
    to give an assist,
    and share a glass with her twin.

  85. Rich D says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Awoke with his ass in a bin
    As he left the dumpster
    He pulled off his rumpster
    A used and unraveled lambskin

  86. Kathy El-Assal says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Used his tub for distilling some in,
    But his wife, unaware,
    Stripped herself bare
    And pickled her pretty pink skin.

  87. Kathy El-Assal says:

    A woman was partial to gin,
    Bridge, canasta: her drive was to win.
    A game of strip poker–
    Now that nearly broke her–
    Reduced her to panties and skin.

  88. Kathy El-Assal says:

    Lovely Ilsa was partial to gin
    When she spotted Rick’s place and went in.
    In old Casablanca
    She used lingua franca
    To ask that Sam “Play It Agin”.

  89. Robert Schechter says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Told his bartender once with a grin,
    “Maurice, I insist
    That you toss in a twist,
    For my doctor says I am too thin.”

    A man who was partial to gin
    Said, “The thing is that when I begin
    I find I can’t stop
    Till the world is a top
    And I’m dizzily watching it spin.”

    A chap who was partial to gin
    Announced, “Don’t put tonic within
    The glass that I drink from.
    It’s a practice I shrink from.
    Diluting one’s liquor’s a sin.”

    A man who was partial to gin
    Was wholly committed to sin.
    “‘Partial,’ I think,
    Is okay if it’s drink,
    But I always take all if it’s skin.”

    A man who was partial to Gin-
    Seng tea told me, “Tetley’s a sin,
    Just warmed-over piddle.
    It’s an out-of-tune fiddle
    While Ginseng’s a fine violin.”

    A man who is partial to gin
    Meets a gal who thinks card games are sin,
    But she gives up her scruples
    When his money quadruples.
    “It’s a virtue,” she says, “If you win.

    A man who was partial to gin
    Asked me, “Are you a yang or a yin?”
    “I’m yang,” I replied,
    “Outside of my hide,
    But I’m utterly yangless within.”

  90. sideview says:

    A man who was partial to gin
    Announced with a lopsided grin
    “I’m giving up drinking
    And taking up thinking,
    I just don’t know where to begin”/

  91. madkane says:

    Thanks everyone for your fun limericks. This Limerick-Off is officially over. And the winner is…

    Congratulations to the Limerick of the Week Winner, the Facebook Friends’ Choice Award Winner and the Honorable Mention Winners! LImerick of the Week 52.

    But you can can still have fun with limericks because a new Limerick-Off has already begun: Shrill Limerick.