Drunken Limerick Limerick Audio

Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts…

Here’s mine:

Drunken Limerick (Drunken Limerick Audio)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man who was drunk and lacked smarts
Was playing a bar game of darts.
His dart throw went wild
And he injured a child.
He should stick to a card game like hearts.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

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18 Responses to “Drunken Limerick Limerick Audio

  1. Audrey Regan says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Surprisingly broke many hearts
    Gals would claim he was hot
    Though he clearly was not
    They just liked his house in St. Barts

  2. A man who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Was trying to get rid of some warts
    The barmaid said, “It’s
    Just a couple of zits,
    Don’t you know that from Liberal Arts?”

  3. scott says:

    A man who was drunk and lacked smarts,
    Thought himself a modern Descartes.
    “I exist cuz’ I think.”
    “I don’t smell, but I stink,”
    He is full of more than just farts.

  4. Brion Emde says:

    A man who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Was trying to light up his farts
    The noxious explosions
    Caused burst of emotions
    He’s lucky he kept all his parts

  5. Linkmeister says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Mistakenly thought he had parts
    He made passes at girls
    Who’d never give him a whirl
    And railed that they all were just tarts.

  6. jesse levy says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    would belch loudly in fits and in starts
    He was in church you see
    and when he dropped his rosary
    he let go the most legendary of farts

  7. madkane says:

    These are great fun! Thanks and please keep them coming!

  8. jesse levy says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Wanted to increase his money parts
    To show he was dumb
    (As dumb as they come)
    He got a degree – a bachelor of arts!

  9. Audrey Regan says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Doctored records, photos and charts
    It all seemed so convincing
    Yet the sane folks were wincing
    This is how a bloody war starts

  10. Audrey Regan says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Fell into the sea at St. Barts
    A small fish named Rose
    Now lives in his nose
    While hungry things feast on his parts

    These creatures are thankful alright
    Just ask the piranha named Wight
    The guy was well-pickled
    The fish are just tickled
    They nibble then party all night

  11. madkane says:

    These are great fun! Thanks, and please keep them coming.

  12. Johanna Richmond says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Feared he’d misplaced a few of his parts
    So he lowered his drawers,
    Got down on all fours
    And fondled his newfound sweethearts.

  13. Thomas Auzinger says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Started his poems with farts
    Though most of the time
    They resisted to rhyme
    He never gave up on his flatulent arts.

  14. Dr. Goose says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Could still prove a point of Descartes’:
    “Though I’m tipsy and dumb,
    ‘Cogito ergo sum,’
    And my sum counts for less than my parts.”

  15. madkane says:

    What a fun selection of limericks. Thanks! And I’m looking forward to more.

  16. Edward says:

    A guy who was drunk and lacked smarts
    Fell in with mischievous tarts
    Who bamboozled the guy
    Into unzipping his fly
    Then poured hot sauce on his tender parts.

  17. Jim Welsh says:

    A man who was drunk and lacked smarts
    didn’t much care for darts
    so he left the bar and got in his car
    he cried in his beer and mourned his loss which was the passing of his uncle, Uncle Art

  18. Steve Nance says:

    Well, the fellow was drunk and lacked smarts,
    But his lawyer — well, he knew his arts.
    In the suit that he filed,
    Queried he, “Why’s that child
    In a bar with some drunks playing darts?”