A Dog Of A Limerick

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A wealthy old woman named Kate…

Here’s mine:

A Dog Of A Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A wealthy old woman named Kate
Left her dog an enormous estate.
Her children all stewed
Till they finally sued.
Who won? Well, each lawyer did great.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.

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26 Responses to “A Dog Of A Limerick”

  1. Carroll says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Liked to sit on her ass when she ate
    She got terrible fat’
    Eating herrings and sprat
    Now she wants to move on to pate. (I know, I know..)

  2. A wealthy old woman named Kate
    died suddenly from stuff she ate.
    Her kids blamed each other
    for poisoning Mother,
    reluctant to blame fickle fate.

  3. Linkmeister says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Worried muchly about her bald pate
    Said she “I need hair!
    It just isn’t fair!”
    And she angrily railed against fate.

  4. A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Kept her money locked in a crate.
    She checked it often
    Till she left in a coffin
    That’s the story of the late woman Kate.

  5. KB says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Was aware of her children ingrate
    So she picked a pen and paper
    Decimated them with a scraper
    Of a will, and a piece of black slate!

  6. KB says:

    It is Kate who killed the unfortunate
    Kids her mate and she did procreate
    Through a will
    That sadly still
    Is for eighty years under legal debate

  7. KB says:

    That dear old lady, Mrs. Kate in an inebriated state
    To her elephant did write her testament to dedicate
    A thousand acre banana orchard and an eel
    Three igloos and twenty three pans of steel
    And the Graf Zeppelin tied to a mast in her estate

    I hope Mrs. Kate now knows her bananas will
    Let her elephant remain content and have his fill
    While the irate neighbor will savor
    The elephant’s smelly favor
    Of puddles and broken trees rolling down hill

  8. Ellen Garneau says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate,
    Was finally asked out on a date.
    Although he was charming,
    The news too alarming,
    Her immediate death was just fate.

    Her suitor, just what should he do?
    She was dead and had turned rather blue.
    So he dressed her all up,
    Took her out for a cup,
    And left her body there in the loo.

    The case finally came to probate.
    What a cumbersome task of the state.
    Second cousins did fight,
    A scene into the night.
    They were entitled to her estate.

    The funeral was a small affair.
    Her family, they just never did care,
    In her will it did say,
    Her own Church she would pay,
    So no one but her Pastor was there.

  9. A wealthy old woman named Kate,
    looked to want ads to find a mate.
    Responders all booed
    when they saw her nude
    but a blind man thought she was great.

  10. linda moss says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate,
    Forever and always was late.
    A young guy came calling
    But he left her a-balling,
    when her wheelchair got stuck at the gate.

  11. Jesse Levy says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Was constantly running late
    It made her hubby mad
    So she went with the fad
    And traded him for a much younger mate.

  12. A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Pretend to be gay when she’s straight
    She wore rainbow suspenders
    And confused both genders
    Now she stays home and just masturbates.

  13. Mad Kane says:

    Wow! What a fun assortment of limericks and verse. Wealthy Kate apparently has made your imaginations run wild. Thanks, and please keep them coming.

  14. Denise Kusel says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Began to question her fate
    She wanted to know
    Why ill winds blow
    When she never shared her plate

  15. Veralynne Pepper says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Was never in need of a date
    The young men came runnin’
    When the yacht or Bentley engine was gunnin’
    Cuz she hired young, healthy girls by the crate.

  16. Veralynne Pepper says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Had suitors whenever she ate
    The butcher, the baker
    The finest wine maker
    They all came to fill Miss Kate’s plate

  17. Jeff says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Was convinced that it’s never too late.
    So she looked for a man
    Just as hard as she can
    Using all of that money as bait.

  18. Carroll says:

    A wealthy old woman names Kate
    Got terribly tired of her mate
    So she used all that money to fin a new honey
    The prenup made ex de-inflate.

  19. Dr. Goose says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Said, “I won’t spend a dime on a date,
    But I’d sure like a suitor
    A little bit cuter
    Than that which you have to inflate.”

  20. Mark Kane says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Loved sex with any hot mate.
    She’d bed guys by the dozens,
    Then do all their cousins.
    But no one dared making her wait.

  21. madkane says:

    Thanks so much everyone. It’s great to see so many fun limericks. And more are welcome, of course.

  22. Steve Vitoff says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Had a cousin who traveled upstate
    When the cousin got home
    She wax-papered her comb
    And kazooed til it just got too late…

  23. Steve Vitoff says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Got frustrated learning to skate
    so she took off her rollers
    became an ayatollah
    and moved kith and kin to Kuwait

  24. Swisstoons says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Had no trouble finding a date.
    Old men didn’t suit ‘er.
    Young men who were lewder
    Did all of her appetites sate

  25. madkane says:

    Thanks to all of you once again for your delightful limericks! I’ve just posted a new Limerick-Off right here: http://www.madkane.com/humor_blog/2010/05/03/opera-verse/ . Hope to see your limericks there too!

  26. Sally Franz says:

    A wealthy old woman named Kate
    Strolled her gardens just to meditate
    But her kids, spouse and sister
    Had her panties in a twister
    She grabbed Jack Daniels just to medicate