Archive for the ‘Politics Satire’ Category
Monday, September 10th, 2007
I had to laugh when I heard about Brit Hume’s exclusive Fox interview with General David Petraeus and Ambassador Ryan Crocker “about the state of the Iraq war and their testimony to Congress.” What’s the matter — wasn’t Hannity available?
Petraeus and Crocker Face Hume Humiliation (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gen. Petraeus and Crocker on Fox
(Not exactly the school of hard knocks)
Where they weave and they spin
And avow “We must win,”
While Brit Hume bows and kisses their socks.
And now a quick haiku about the purported Iraq violence reduction:
Reducing violence
In Iraq is quite easy:
Redefine violence.
(You can find more of my Petraeus humor here and my previous Brit Hume humor here.)
=========
And now some links, for your reading (and viewing) pleasure:
* ‘Old Navy” Stores Looted, After Hiring Rumsfeld as CEO
* About.com’s Political Humor on Bush’s Gaffes
* Hit it: morrrrrre…than the greatest polls the worrrrrld has known…
* Digby’s Overplaying Their Hand
* Exclusive! — The Patraeus testimony In advance! (Dick Polman)
* Larry Johnson on Dave Petraeus and Iraq Kabuki
* The Very Polite Matt Bai On Giuliani
* Blog Carnival of Observations On Life
* Sunday Funnies
* Carnival of Principled Government
Tags: Ambassador Ryan Crocker, Brit Hume Humor, Fox News Satire, General David Petraeus, Hannity, Iraq Surge, Iraq War Humor, Iraq War Violence, Petraeus Congressional Testimony
Posted in Brit Hume, Foreign Policy, General Petraeus, Iraq War Humor, Media Satire, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire | 4 Comments »
Sunday, September 9th, 2007
These days I find Bush gaffes more sad than amusing. But I couldn’t resist this great headline: Bush backs ‘Austrian troops’ at ‘OPEC’.
You say APEC, and Bush says OPEC.
You say Australian, and Bush says Austrian.
APEC,
OPEC,
Australian,
Austrian:
Let’s call the Bush term off.
(My apologies to the Gershwin brothers.) [tags]Bush Gaffes, Bushisms, APEC, OPEC, Australian, Austrian, Gershwin[/tags]
Posted in Bushisms, George Bush Satire, Politics Satire, Song Parodies, White House | 6 Comments »
Wednesday, August 29th, 2007
I just couldn’t resist writing some limericks about the hypocritical, gay-bashing Senator Larry Craig:
A Trio Of Limericks For Idaho Senator Larry Craig
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Craig confessed to a crime in the loo
He proclaims that he never would do,
Cuz he’s straight as can be:
He was just there to pee,
And perversions he’d always eschew.
When Larry was under arrest,
He was stressed, which is why he confessed.
All his actions are pure
And he’s really demure
And not gay, except when he’s undressed.
Larry Craig says he has a wide stance
In the john when he zips down his pants:
He’s an innocent man.
His arrest in the can
Was an error, cuz Craig ain’t no nance.
Tags: Anti-Gay Legislation, Anti-Gay Politicians, Idaho Senator, Larry Craig, Wide Stance
Posted in Homophobia, Larry Craig, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 16 Comments »
Monday, August 27th, 2007
Poor Alberto Gonzales! During those countless (and fruitless) Congressional hearings, Gonzales had but one job — protect George Bush. And so he lied, obfuscated, feigned amnesia, and did everything he could to muddy the truth. Consequently, this George Bush line, made during the Gonzales resignation announcement, made me laugh out loud:
It’s sad that we live in a time when a talented and honorable person like Al Gonzales is impeded from doing good work because his good name was dragged through the mud for political reasons.
Of course, the obvious question is “What good name?” But putting that aside, Bush fails to mention the provenance of all that mud. This haiku should explain it:
Dub’s dirty secrets
Created the “mud” Bush claims
Gonzales dragged through.
(You can find more of my Alberto Gonzales humor and poems here.)[tags]Alberto Gonzales, Resignation, Al Gonzales Good Name, Congressional Hearings, Gonzales Verse, Gonzales Poetry, Gonzales Haiku, Gonzales Lies, Gonzales Amnesia[/tags]
Posted in Alberto Gonzales, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 2 Comments »
Thursday, August 23rd, 2007
Can we ever get rid of Bush’s spinmeister cronies? Apparently not. Sure, they eventually quit. But they stubbornly refuse to stay quit.
Remember when Karen Hughes resigned amidst all sorts of hoopla? Well, she stayed away for roughly a nanosecond and she’s currently with the State Department, “leading efforts to promote America’s values.”
And now the dishonorable Ari Fleischer has resurfaced and, once again, he’s flacking George Bush’s needless war, via the White House front group Freedom’s Watch.
I thought I’d celebrate Ari’s comeback with a limerick:
Why I No Longer Get Excited When Bush Cronies Quit
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Bush spinmeisters keep coming back:
First Karen returned. What a hack!
Now Ari is here,
Spreading war lies and fear.
Guess they don’t really leave; they just pack.
=========
And now some links, for your reading (and viewing) pleasure:
* The Buzzflash Media Putz of the Week
* Don Davis’s Bush Explains His ‘Domino’ Theory of Vietnam
* skippy has lots of fun at Mitt Romney’s expense
* Norm at OneGoodMove has the Daily Show’s Samantha Bee commenting on Bush’s vacation record
* Digby on Michael McConnell and retroactive immunity for private companies
* All Hat No Cattle presents Bush’s History
* Carnival of Satire
* Carnival of the Decline of Democracy [tags]Freedom’s Watch, White House Front Group Bush Spinmeisters, Ari Fleischer, Karen Hughes, Bush Spokesman Humor, Bush Flacks, Bush Cronies[/tags]
Posted in Ari Fleischer, Foreign Policy, Freedom's Watch, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Iraq War Humor, Karen Hughes, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, August 22nd, 2007
Have you seen this photo of Russian President Vladimir Putin? Boy, that Pootie-Poot is majorly buff! And something tells me that George Dubya Bush is seriously jealous. After all, he sure as hell isn’t built like this.
That brings me to my latest poll:
{democracy:10}
Update: How come so many presidential physiques are in the news? Apparently French President Nicolas Sarkozy’s naked “poignees d’amour (love handles)” were retouched by the French magazine Paris Match — tightened to make him look more svelte. [tags]Vladimir Putin, Pootie-Poot, Buff Russian President, Putin Humor, Putin Satire, Dubya Humor, Gym Rats, Bush Putin Poll[/tags]
Posted in Foreign Policy, George Bush Satire, Politics Satire, Polls, Vladimir Putin | 2 Comments »
Sunday, August 19th, 2007
I wasn’t surprised to hear that Tony Snow plans to leave his Bush spokesperson gig when his “money runs out,” and possibly as early as September.
In fact, the only thing that surprised me was that he came back to his White House job at all after his latest bout with cancer. I can’t imagine anyone with a life-threatening illness wanting to spend what could possibly be his last years or even months being a Bush patsy on a government salary. And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Yet Another Snow Job?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Bush spokesman, ex-Foxer named Snow
Is quite ill and is planning to go.
Must be stressful to lie
Ev’ry day for that guy.
Why not do it for big network dough? [tags]Tony Snow, White House Spokesman, Bush Spokesman, Snow Resignation, Fox Cable News[/tags]
Posted in George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tony Snow, White House | 5 Comments »
Friday, August 17th, 2007
Do you think the long-awaited General David H. Petraeus’s Iraq surge report will “see” as much “tangible progress” as Petraeus claimed to see in the election-influencing op ed he wrote for the Washington Post back on September 26, 2004?
Will it be a “clear-eyed report from a top general” accurately assessing military progress? A report that even approaches the honest document Bush promised in order to buy himself a lot more time?
Hahahahaha!
Anyone who nurtured even the slightest fantasy that the Petraeus assessment would be the real deal, now must surely know otherwise:
Despite Bush’s repeated statements that the report will reflect evaluations by Petraeus and Ryan Crocker, the U.S. ambassador to Iraq, administration officials said it would actually be written by the White House, with inputs from officials throughout the government.
And though Petraeus and Crocker will present their recommendations on Capitol Hill, legislation passed by Congress leaves it to the president to decide how to interpret the report’s data.
So why is Petraeus sacrificing what little remains of his integrity by letting the White House author his report? Yes, you guessed it — it’s time for another poll:
{democracy:9}
(You can catch up with my previous polls here. And check out Petraeus’ Report To Be Cribbed From … ‘Monarch Notes’.)[tags]General David Petraeus, Petraeus Iraq Surge Report, George Bush, Tangible Progress, Petraeus Poll[/tags]
Posted in Foreign Policy, General Petraeus, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Iraq War Humor, Politics Satire, Polls, Republicans Humor, White House | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, August 14th, 2007
Okay, so Karl Rove has resigned to spend more time with his family. Yeah … right. This calls for a poll, don’t you think?
{democracy:8}
(My Bush impeachment poll is still open for business, and you can find my Bush’s Brain limerick here..) [tags]Karl Rove’s Resignation, Bush’s Brain Resigns, Polls, Polling, Humor[/tags]
Posted in George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Karl Rove, Politics Satire, Polls, Republicans Humor, White House | 4 Comments »
Thursday, August 9th, 2007
According to Americablog, CNN’s Ed Henry has reported that Bush now has a spanking new (and personal) press briefing room podium.
I guess the podium used by Tony Snow and Dana Perino must have cooties. Or perhaps they’re hiding some sort of electronic “dictate the answers to Bush” equipment inside his personal podium. On the other hand, this just might be Dick Cheney’s undisclosed location.
Bush on his podium
Fills me with odium.
Pass the Imodium. [tags]Bush Podium, Bush Press Conferences, Cheney Undisclosed Location, Tony Snow, Dana Perino[/tags]
Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Press Conferences, Republicans Humor, Tony Snow, White House | 5 Comments »
Sunday, August 5th, 2007
I finally dare to fantasize that the Democrats may have gotten their act together, and they pull a cowardly stunt like this:
Just when the Dems at least are talking tough (even if they aren’t acting tough), they let Bush and Cheney intimidate them into giving them more spying powers. …
Can’t the Democrats just say “no,” as in “Sorry, you have proven that you can’t be trusted with increased spying powers, in fact you are still failing to fully inform Congress and the American people about the illegal spying you have conducted in the past and are still, apparently, conducting”?…
Unfortunately, my January 2006 limerick, George Bush Says His Spying Is Cool, remains valid. But that certainly won’t prevent me from writing another one:
Bush Growls; Dems Kowtow
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Dems disappoint us again,
Backing Bush in his eavesdropping yen.
We need Dems to defend us
From Bush bills horrendous.
When will Dems turn from mice into men?
And now it’s time for a new poll, though my Bush impeachment poll remains open for business:
{democracy:7}
(You can find lots of my privacy, technology, and computer humor columns, song parodies and verse here.) [tags]Democratic Cowards, Bush Eavesdropping, Eavesdropping Poll, Bush Spying, Gonzales Eavesdropping[/tags]
Posted in Congress Humor, Democrats Satire, Eavesdropping, George Bush Satire, House Satire, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Polls, Senate Satire, White House | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, July 24th, 2007
Alberto Gonzales is but one of the Bushie liars and Bush enablers whose Congressional hearing testimony can be summarized by this limerick:
Every Bushie’s Testimony Summed Up In A Single Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Don’t recall, don’t remember, can’t say
What I did or I said on that day.
But I happily swear
On the life of ma mère,
I did nothing that’s wrongful. No way!”
(You can find more of my Gonzales satire here, my legal humor here, and my limericks and other satirical verse here.)
UPDATE: Don’t forget to vote in my Bush Impeachment Poll! [tags]Bushies, Liars, Congressional Testimony, Senate Testimony, House Testimony, Senate Hearings, House Hearings, Deposition Humor, Subpoena Satire, Bush Cheney Administration, Bush Enablers, Convenient Memory, Alberto Gonzales, Gonzo, Liars[/tags]
Posted in Alberto Gonzales, Congress Humor, Corruption Humor, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, House Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, White House | 3 Comments »
Saturday, July 21st, 2007
Requisite Bush colonoscopy snark:
Dick Cheney’s in charge
While George Bush is unconscious.
How’s this day different…?
(You can find more of my news haiku here.) [tags]President Bush, VP Cheney, Bush Colonoscopy, Bush Snark, Politics Haiku [/tags]
Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Health Satire, News Haiku & Senryu, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 3 Comments »
Tuesday, July 17th, 2007
Remember when the Republican majority flipped out at the mere whisper of the word filibuster? Remember when GOPers led by Bill Frist, Mitch McConnell, and Trent Lott threatened the “nuclear option” if Democrats had the audacity to filibuster any of George Bush’s extremist judicial nominees?
Those were heady days back then, when Republicans would scream “Up or down vote!” and decry Democrats as “obstructionists,” and the media would obediently parrot their condemnations. Oh yes … and the Democrats caved and failed to filibuster, giving us a whole slew of rightwingnut federal judges who will haunt us for many decades to come.
Well now that the Republicans are the minority party they just love the filibuster and have conveniently forgotten that they ever condemned it.
Back when filibusters were “bad,” I wrote a filibuster song parody to the French-Canadian children’s song Alouette. Somehow it seems like a good time for a new set of lyrics to the same tune:
The Full-a-Bluster Song
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Filibuster.
Ban the filibuster!”
Ancient bluster
from the GOP.
With a Dem majority
Republicans think differently:
“Great device!
Ain’t it nice.
Blocks Dem bills!
They’re all on ice.”
Oh…
Filibuster
Suddenly has luster.
Grand Old Party’s
Hack Hypocrisy.
(You can find more of my political song parodies here.)[tags]Filibuster, GOP Hypocrisy, Trent Lott, Mitch McConnell, Bill Frist, Song Parody, Republicans, Iraq War, Nuclear Option, Up Or Down Vote, Obstructionism, Judicial Nominees[/tags]
Posted in Congress Humor, Constitution Humor, Filibuster Humor, Foreign Policy, GOP Humor, Iraq War Humor, Legislation Humor, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Song Parodies, Trent Lott, Uncategorized | 7 Comments »
Monday, July 16th, 2007
From: Lugar_and_Warner@Senate.gov
To: Stephen_Hadley@Whitehouse.gov
Subject: Our “Pretty Please Pretend To Plan to End The Iraq War Eventually” Proposal
Thanks bunches for making the rounds yesterday with all that Bush veto talk. Karl was right! It was just what we needed to make antsy constituents think our amendment actually does something. [tags]Stephen Hadley, Senator Richard Lugar, Senator John Warner, Karl Rove[/tags]
Posted in George Bush Satire, Iraq War Humor, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, White House | Comments Off on An AWOL Email
Wednesday, July 11th, 2007
Dan Froomkin isn’t surprised that “confronted with a tide of anti-war sentiment and a growing number of defecting Republican lawmakers, the White House is changing not its policy on Iraq, but its message.” Froomkin pithily sums it all up:
Enter the new White House talking point: You want out? We want out, too!
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Message: I Share … Your Goals. (Bush to the Revolting Republicans)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Bush’s party has grown rather sick
Of the war in Iraq spawned by Dick,
Cause Election ’08
Looms and threatens their fate,
And Rove platitudes won’t end it quick.
(You can find more of my antiwar humor here.) [tags]Bush War, Iraq War, Antiwar Sentiment, Revolting Republicans, Election 08, Defecting GOP Lawmakers[/tags]
Posted in Congress Humor, Election Satire, Foreign Policy, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, House Satire, Iraq War Humor, Karl Rove, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, White House | 4 Comments »
Tuesday, July 3rd, 2007
I can almost hear that promise Bush and Cheney surely made to Scooter Libby way back when:
Tell no tales,
And you won’t go to jail.
Scooter came through with flying (and lying) colors and has now gotten his unjust deserts:
Bush obstructs justice,
Rewarding Scooter’s silence:
Prison-free pay-off.
(You can find more legal and lawyer humor and satire here and more news and political haiku here.) [tags]Scooter Libby, Lewis “Scooter” Libby, Commutation, Commuted Sentence, Bush Obstructs Justice, President Bush, VP Cheney, Cover Up, Valerie Plame[/tags]
Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, Law Satire, Libby Humor, News Haiku & Senryu, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, June 26th, 2007
Oh, lovely! Ralph Nader is threatening to run for President again:
Suffering From Bloomberg-Envy … Or Just an Idiotic Egomaniac?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Seems that throwing elections is fun
For Ralph Nader, who’s threat’ning to run
Once again in ’08.
So I’m angry, irate—
That’s how Bush got his place in the sun.
(My previous Ralph Nader satire is here.)
Posted in Campaign Humor, Democracy Humor, Election Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Ralph Nader, White House | 1 Comment »
Thursday, June 21st, 2007
As a long-time New York City resident, I’m amused by Rudy Giuliani’s candidacy. And I find it ironic that Rudy doesn’t dare brag about the one thing that might appeal to people put off by his pro-choice, pro-gay rights positions — Giuliani’s aggressive stance against free speech.
But understanding irony has never been Rudy’s strong suit. For instance, he’s unlikely to appreciate the irony underlying his running as the security-candidate, after Newsday outed him as a greedy windbag who was forced to drop-out of the bipartisan Iraq Study Group because he was too busy giving lucrative speeches to attend ISG meetings:
The GOP’s In For A Rudy Awakening
By Madeleine Begun Kane
He’ll protect us–that’s Rudy’s motif.
But his claim must defy all belief:
Cause when push comes to shove,
Major wealth’s his first love.
He’s the ISG Drop-Out-In-Chief. [tags]Rudy Giuliani, Security President, ISG, Iraq Study Group, Newsday, New York City, Pro-Choice, Pro-Gay Rights, Free Speech, Security Candidate, Greedy Windbag, Lucrative Speeches[/tags]
Posted in Election Satire, Foreign Policy, Free Speech, GOP Humor, Iraq War Humor, New York Mayors, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Rudy Giuliani, White House | 1 Comment »
Thursday, June 21st, 2007
I wonder if President Bush was as surprised as the rest of us at learning that his VEEP isn’t part of the Executive Branch. Yup, Bush’s Lord and Master Dick Cheney has declared his office to be exempt from all sorts of pesky legal Executive Branch requirements because — presto chango — it isn’t part of the Executive Branch. Needless to say, Henry Waxman and the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee aren’t pleased with Cheney’s out-of-the-box Constitution-plundering assertion.
Just one question: If VEEP Cheney isn’t part of the Executive Branch, does that mean he’s waived his right to claim Executive Privilege? Just wondering.
(You can find more of my legal and lawyer humor and satire here.)
[tags]Dick Cheney, Vice President Richard Cheney, Executive Privilege, Executive Branch, Chairman Waxman, House Oversight And Government Reform Committee, Constitutional Crisis, George Bush, Satire[/tags]
Posted in Constitution Humor, Constitutional Crisis, Democracy Humor, Dick Cheney Satire, GOP Humor, Henry Waxman, House Satire, Law Satire, Politics Satire, White House | 1 Comment »
